https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 18 Apr 2026 06:57:22 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1718094 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 10:11:06 +0000 mrsjyw 1718094@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think around 3 months. I went back to work, DH &amp; I went on our first date night out, I lost a lot of my baby wt, and felt like DS and I were in a good routine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1718076 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 10:07:08 +0000 skibobrown 1718076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For me it took a long time. It's hard to pinpoint exactly when b/c it happened gradually, but I'd say between 6 months and a year things really started feeling normal (or I guess a new normal) for me again. I'd also say that a real turning point for us happened around 2.5 months when we started putting DD to bed between 7 and 8 PM. Getting some "us" time in the evening after DD was asleep made me feel a lot more human again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1718027 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 09:54:18 +0000 Glitter 1718027@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm 7 wks PP and don't feel like myself physically, but emotionally I do. I guess if/when I lose the extra belly fat and the acne scars fade I'll feel like myself physically again. But emotionally, I think I fell right into motherhood. I love it and it though life has changed a lot, this feels like me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1717782 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 08:42:15 +0000 blackbird 1717782@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For me, it's come in stages. I felt good after a few months, then when I went back to work, I felt like I had more pieces of "me". Then better after 6/7 months, and really great at her birthday. Something about that 1 year mark :) </p> <p>I still have a social life and have always maintained it. But it's peppered within my regular life of being a mom. I still make time for a happy hour now and then, I still make time to be a very active person, and I still make time for friends. I do crafts and things I enjoy after she goes to bed. Sometimes I get burnt out, though. It happens. </p> <p>Honestly, for me, once E was STTN consistently, I was able to spend more time on myself and doing fun things, instead of prioritizing sleep and being a miserable cranky ass. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1717697 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 08:16:52 +0000 petunia354 1717697@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think maybe 9ish months? I had been back to work for a while and we had a pretty solid routine by then.</p> <p>Although he just started STTN most of the time at 18 months, and I truly didn't feel like myself until I started to get some consistent sleep. I have high sleep needs though.... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1717694 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 08:16:01 +0000 Mrs. Lion 1717694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Physically I felt back to normal within a couple weeks. Mentally and emotionally, I don't know if I will ever feel "normal" again, since I am now a SAHM and this life is completely new to me. It is a continually changing process. It took me until about 9 months or so to realize that there wasn't going to be a magical moment where everything would get easier...that it was just going to continue to be challenging, just in different ways.</p> <p>ETA: as far as social life goes, that didn't change too much. We have always been ones to travel and spend time with friends either at their houses or ours, before and after baby was born. This has pretty much stayed the same, although we do have to be a bit less flexible with LO's schedule. The thing that did change is that I had a hard time adapting to not having people around me all the time. I am still in the process of finding new friends who are available during the day. Building relationships takes time, and I didn't anticipate how hard it would be to be flying solo all day with a pretty easygoing baby. The boredom and loneliness really took a toll on me during the first year. It is slowly getting better, but only because I have worked really hard to make the effort to meet people and spend time with friends. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1717661 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 07:58:18 +0000 JoJoGirl 1717661@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I started to feel "better" around 6 months and really like myself around a year. LO started STTN at 10 months and I started getting treated for PPD right at the same time, so the combo really boosted me back to where I was before mood-wise.</p> <p>But you asked about having a social life... that never recovered! Mostly because any "free" time I have I prefer to spend 1) having alone time at home with DH 2) sleeping or 3) working out. Social life has fallen to the bottom of my priority list, and I'm okay with that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1717652 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 07:54:05 +0000 looch 1717652@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Gosh, it took me a long time. I think it is partly due to the fact that I stayed at home following the birth of my son. For someone that has spent the majority of their adult life working and going to a job, it was kind of stifling.</p> <p>I became myself again when I started working again a year and a half ago. My focus shifted from being solely on my son to being on my marriage, myself, my family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1717534 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 05:12:17 +0000 ElbieKay 1717534@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son is 3.5 months old. I am still recovering physically. I am healed in a medical sense, but yoga is a lot harder and I still have residual lower back and hip pain. I went back to work three weeks ago and am still trying to figure out that balance. At present I could probably work towards resuming my social life -- i.e., I could make it work logistically -- but it would be at the cost of my ability to focus on my job and take away time with the baby. Plus, right now he is exclusively breastmilk fed, so being away from him is logistically complicated unless I am at the office where I am set up to pump and have a routine for it. So, I am choosing to forego most baby-free socializing for the time being. It's the lowest stress option for me.</p> <p>But, I'm 37 and spent 9 years living in Manhattan from ages 25-34. I have done a LOT of socializing and am pretty much over it except for my very closest friends. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1717516 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 04:01:39 +0000 illumina 1717516@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO is 9 months old and although I have really good days where I feel like I've got this, for the most part I still worry a lot and other days where I think I have no idea what I'm doing. I still don't feel like my old self though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self/page/2#post-1717512 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 03:44:12 +0000 Bubbles 1717512@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO is 6 months and I still don't really feel like I am quite there yet. We've come a long way and I am far more happy and confident than the early days - but I still regularly doubt myself and the decisions I make. He's still BF the majority of the time, and will only take a bottle from me, so that makes a difference. </p> <p>Like others said, a regular and active social life feels a long way off! But LO and I are out and about regularly and go to lots of classes and playgroups - so that is a big improvement on the social front and means I have people to talk to as DH works long hours and I stay home. </p> <p>Physically I bounced back pretty quickly - certainly by 6 weeks pp I felt completely recovered and my body was back to normal. I had a straightforward delivery and no stitches though which I think helped! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717507 Tue, 24 Jun 2014 03:32:04 +0000 Cherrybee 1717507@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>is tarted to see light at the end of a long, long tunnel when she was around 5 months old. I only really started feeling like my old self again once I went back to work, when she was 6.5 months. I started feeling like "I got this" when she was around 8 months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717461 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 22:58:10 +0000 keepcalmcarrie 1717461@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Physically, it was about 2 months - by then, my stitches had healed, breastfeeding was easy, I was back to pre-preg weight, I just felt good. Emotionally, it was about 4 months - which was also when he started really sleeping in longer stretches (like, not 7 hours, but 9 or 10 - so I had a few hours to myself at night, and not a terribly early wake-up). Before that, I had some pretty serious anxiety, but I didn't realize it until later. It's like I was holding my breath for his entire newborn life! I will definitely be more aware of that with LO#2.</p> <p>But socially? I LOL-ed at what @Silva: - I still do not have a "regular and active social life," and LO#1 is almost 16 months. We see our friends every few weeks, sometimes just once a month. I guess we don't make it enough of a priority right now, but with a really active toddler, I am TIRED at the end of the day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717425 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 21:51:15 +0000 Trailmix 1717425@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's been a year and I'm still waiting... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717416 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 21:42:07 +0000 NurseMommy 1717416@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I honestly don't feel like myself even at 13 months. I do, however, feel like a better version of myself. I think I starting hitting my stride around 4 months; at 6 months I was feeling pretty good, and I'm really loving life right now.</p> <p>eta: going back to work 6 weeks ago really helped me start feeling "normal" again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717404 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 21:27:17 +0000 Lindsay05 1717404@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>After a year with my first. I had (and still at times) miss my old self and life but those moments are getting farther apart. Its a HARD adjustment! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717397 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 21:21:57 +0000 Grace 1717397@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm still not there at 10 months. It did get a lot closer to normal life at 6 months, but I'm still up 2x a night, I never get to sleep until my body wants to wake. Still breastfeeding and I hate pumping, so I can't be away that long. And I'm still on maternity leave so I feel like my real life is on hiatus. I think life is good now and not such a struggle, but it doesn't feel like normal life yet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717380 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 20:57:06 +0000 loveisstrange 1717380@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, she was about 15 months old. I had some emotional/mental issues from my birth and bad PPD. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717353 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 20:33:48 +0000 QueensBee 1717353@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I felt like myself again on my first day back to work, 6 months pp. I loved being at home with LO on mat leave, and definitely did social things, but it felt like my own life again when I was back at work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717350 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 20:32:21 +0000 pl0508 1717350@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>About 9 months I think. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717348 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 20:29:32 +0000 cascademom 1717348@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I felt normal physically a couple weeks postpartum. Emotionally, I felt great post birth. Stresses put on our marriage made our first year incredibly difficult. I wish I could look back on it more fondly, but I don't. Getting into the groove of motherhood happened around 6 months old. Toddlerhood can be really awesome and really awful. Just dealt with a screaming toddler worked up by Daddy trying to get him calmed down enough to read while being starving. Fun times! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717325 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 20:14:48 +0000 MrsStar 1717325@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I felt back to normal straight away. My midwife visited the day after we got home and asked if I really just had a baby - I felt normal, just with a sidekick with me 100% of the time. Lo was an easy baby though (she never cried during the first 6 weeks, no colic, no reflux, sleeping in 4 hour intervals) which I think really helped. Of course I was tired (and annoyed with dh at times), and had sore boobs but I felt good. I just hope I feel the same when we have another lo. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717316 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 20:09:37 +0000 Mae 1717316@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like this is several different questions...</p> <p>Physically I *sort* of felt like my old self around 4 weeks. I am at 6 weeks now and not totally healed (I had a complication with my c-section incision so I'm dealing with that, but it doesn't hurt or hinder me in any way). Especially my boobs still hurt. But in terms of just feeling like I wasn't in pain, could get around like normal, and could wear my old clothes (mostly)... 4 weeks.</p> <p>Emotionally I think I started to feel mostly back to normal around 4-5 weeks as well, although I continue to get better as we do more stuff. At 5 weeks it was our first weekend after all the family had left and DH and I took LO out to go grocery shopping and go to target and I was like... omg we can run errands! We can DO this! We can leave our house! It was really exciting haha. Then the next day my parents came down and watched LO so DH and I could go see a movie, and I feel like that sort of reminded us that there is a life after baby. And this week (6 weeks) I just had a friend come by to hang out for the first time, and tomorrow I have my first photo shoot (work) since having the baby. So little by little, I'm reclaiming pieces of my old life! *full disclosure: Our LO is a really good sleeper, and that probably helps me feel better about things*</p> <p>As a mom? 4 weeks. It was my first week home alone with LO after having a week in the hospital and 3 weeks of family or DH home with me. I was terrified. But by the second day I felt like wow.. I am capable of caring for her by myself. I'm fine. We're both surviving. I got this. hah </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717289 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 19:50:57 +0000 kml636 1717289@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I read in some article that it takes 4 months... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717258 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 19:26:35 +0000 SleepyMonkey 1717258@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Probably around 6 months. At 4 months I felt like it wasn't too bad. At 6 months I started to feel comfortable being a mother and I understood why people had more than one. That's when I started feeling back to my old self. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717255 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 19:22:52 +0000 lawbee11 1717255@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She started napping better and taking bottles at around 5-6 months (was on a bottle strike before then), so around that time. I'm still tired as hell, but that's when it got easier for us to leave her with a sitter/my mom and go out for date nights or for me to leave her with DH to go out with friends. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717253 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 19:19:01 +0000 cmomma17 1717253@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like a started hitting my mom stride around 9/10/11 months honestly. Feeling pretty good and happy now at 14 months. Life is different but I love it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717248 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 19:10:18 +0000 Boheme 1717248@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I still don't feel normal. Not better, not worse, just different. Does that even make sense? I feel like my pre-baby life is light years behind me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717246 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 19:07:25 +0000 Smurfette 1717246@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@swedishfish: it was amazing how it helped me feel better </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-long-did-it-take-you-to-really-settle-into-being-a-mother-or-feel-back-to-your-old-self#post-1717243 Mon, 23 Jun 2014 19:01:26 +0000 swedishfish 1717243@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Smurfette: yes! I stopped pumping at 5 months and weaned at 6 months. That's when I started feeling more in control and like "me" again. </p>