https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 27 May 2026 13:49:44 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2336896 Wed, 28 Oct 2015 11:00:22 +0000 namaste 2336896@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Once a quarter + certain holidays. Once a month would be too much (My ILs live 45 mins away...) because we are really busy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2335668 Tue, 27 Oct 2015 12:37:26 +0000 snowjewelz 2335668@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I picked at at most once a month you go to them, and it's fine if they wanna come up (but gotta clear schedule with you first). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2334687 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 20:48:55 +0000 MrsB2012 2334687@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was in between once a month and the 6 x per year. I voted 6x per year, but I'd say more every 4-6 weeks. But, that's also based on what I think would be reasonable with my inlaws. ( who I dont care for. ) If I actually enjoyed seeing my inlaws, I'd say more often, 1-2x per month maybe :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2334684 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 20:48:12 +0000 CakeLady 2334684@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted once a month, though I think if we were 2 hours from my in laws they would want to get together every weekend, they don't mind driving at all and are super family oriented. As it is we live a plane ride + 2 hr car ride and they aren't in good enough health to fly we see them 3 times a year or so. </p> <p>My mom lives 30-40 minutes away and we see her at least once a week if not more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2334558 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 19:41:53 +0000 littlecasita1122 2334558@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We live 1.5 hours from my parents and a little over an hour from in-laws. We aim for visits every 3-4 weeks, they come to visit us more than we see them. Sorry but my LO still naps, and it's not guaranteed he'll nap in a car. The great-grandparents make a stink and wish we came down there more often but it is what it is. I also work Sun mornings so it's hard with scheduling. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2333778 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 10:41:38 +0000 nana87 2333778@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My in-laws live about a 4-hr drive away and they get pissy if they don't see LO about 1x/month. My dad lives in the same city as us and we prob see him 2x/motnh, though he travels a lot as he and my mom are long-distance plus he has business travel. on weekends my mom is in town, we see them more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2333677 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 09:48:10 +0000 Applesandbananas 2333677@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We see the ILs 1-2x per year due to geographical distance.</p> <p>We see my side 4-6x per year due to lack of interest from them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2333656 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 09:35:49 +0000 Greentea 2333656@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it depends on the relationship with the grandparents. I grew up seeing mine everyday and it was the best thing ever (they lived across the lake and we'd take the boat). 2 hours to me is nothing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2333653 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 09:33:50 +0000 jmarionsmith 2333653@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted once a month, assuming you alternate months on who does the driving.</p> <p>But in our family, my ILs live 2 hours away and we see them every other weekend. (It would probably be more often if MIL and DH didn't work every other weekend.) BUT they do most of the driving, with us driving to them about once every other month. It used to be a BIG issue with me because I felt like it was too much, but honestly, now that LOs are older it's nice to know that we can almost always count on having a babysitter at least twice a month! :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents/page/2#post-2333606 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 09:02:48 +0000 autumnleaves 2333606@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It depends on who is driving. My parents are not living together and neither can drive. My dad lives 40 minutes away and I was seeing him every other week but it has been really challenging to have to go see him every time. I recently decided to reduce it to one time a month. It would be different if they were able to come and visit us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333578 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 08:36:07 +0000 blackbird 2333578@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd say probably every 6-8 weeks. Hell, DH's grandparents live 40 min away and we see them probably once a month+special occasions. Our weekends are just never that free, it seems. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333540 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 08:10:03 +0000 WinterBee 2333540@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Briony: My parents and grandparents live in my home town about 4 hours away door to door. We typically visit once a month-month and a half including holidays. We don't have LOs yet, but are TTC and will most likely keep this up.<br /> I feel like it's lots, especially because we stay for the whole weekend. Even with the distance we still end up seeing/spending more time with my family even though my DHs lives in the same town as us! :meh:<br /> Currently my parents NEVER visit us, they've only been here once and I drove them! Hoping that will change when babies come along. I'm hoping to do joint events with both sets of in-laws. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333525 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:56:12 +0000 MtnBiker 2333525@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We see both families a lot. More than I'd like personally - but LO loves it, and they're all only 20 minutes away. My mom gets kind of jealous since we see the ILs consistently once a week - but she doesn't want to commit to a routine, so sometimes when she calls last minute I have to decline. My ILs also do all of our laundry, which is a huge help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333522 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:54:21 +0000 mediagirl 2333522@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Briony: what do you think is reasonable...now that you have lots of other opinions? :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333518 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:51:20 +0000 mrs.shinerbock 2333518@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted once a month because I think there is a difference between reasonable and optimal for your family. </p> <p>My parents live 1 hr 45 min away and we go up there for the weekend about once a month (spend Fri and Sat night) but often coincide with holidays. My parents drive here about once a month to see us and my sisters, who both live in the same city as I do, and visits often coincide with birthdays or other kid events. My LO is almost 2 and my older sister has 2.5 yr-old twins.</p> <p>To contrast with another family - my sister takes her boys to visit my parents every 6 weeks or so and only spends 1 night or makes it a day trip. Her husband often does not go and gets his alone time while she goes there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333513 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:45:39 +0000 LuLu Mom 2333513@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We live 20 minutes from each set of grandparents, we see them every other week (minimum) and this is the way we all enjoy it. Sure some months get busier and we may only see them once a month but I know some of my fondest memories growing up are those spend with my grandparents, and as someone who lost both her grandma and grandpa in the last year, I'm glad I have those memories as a child, I know some of my cousins did not. In my mind grandparents aren't going to be around forever, so if they want to spend time with my children I will make it work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333500 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:33:26 +0000 mrsjyw 2333500@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Once a month! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333494 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:29:54 +0000 mediagirl 2333494@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Once a month! My parents live 2.5 hours away and I expect that we will see them once every month. It's tough to do more than that but not hard to do once a month. We typically swap off - we go there, they come here. But they come here more because they're retired and we're obviously not. We have a 3 year old. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333493 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:27:34 +0000 littlebug 2333493@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We live 25 minutes from all everyone and I refuse to commit more than once a month to grandparents. And that's spreading across 3 sets of grandparents. We have things we want/need to as a family. If we committed one weekend a month to each set, we'd never have time as a family. When we lived 2 hours away, we'd plan visits with one set of grandparents each month. However, if we came home for a weekend, we'd try to squeeze all 3 sets into one weekend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333489 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:22:57 +0000 twodoghouse 2333489@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted once a month because I do think that's reasonable. However, we see my ILs once a week and they would like to come more often. Their primary residence is only 45 min away, but their farm house where we spend more time is 1 hr 45 min away. Lately we've been going there every other weekend and the weeks in between my ILs come to us. Honestly, this has been an ongoing issue since my twins were born 17 months ago. So even though I feel a little overwhelmed with once a week visits, it's actually a compromise. :bummed: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333488 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:22:46 +0000 Bao 2333488@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Once a month or every 5 weeks or so. So holidays, birthdays and some times inbetween. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333486 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:18:06 +0000 Modern Daisy 2333486@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think once every 2 months is perfect for a 2 hour drive that you are trading off with them! Once a month is too often. We see DH's parents twice a year since they live a plane ride away. My parents are a 30 minute drive and we are there once about every 6 weeks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333474 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:03:32 +0000 Foodnerd81 2333474@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Somewhere between once a month and 6 times a year, assuming you are sharing the driving duties. </p> <p>My parents live 5 hours away and we see them prob 5 times a year? But nearly always it's me driving to them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333472 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 07:01:55 +0000 clover 2333472@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a 2.5 year old and ILs who live almost 2 hours away and very rarely want to drive here. We usually go over once a month (there may have been a couple months out of the year that we made it twice due to special occasions). If they were willing to split the drive I'd be fine with alternating every other week. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333466 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 06:54:56 +0000 regberadaisy 2333466@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Briony: I think once a month, coinciding with special occasions is reasonable. If they want to see the kids more, can they drive to you? Or meet halfway for lunch/activity or early dinner? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333461 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 06:52:36 +0000 BananaPancakes 2333461@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Once a month if they're driving. Every other month if I'm driving. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333455 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 06:49:44 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2333455@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Voted once a month, but that's even alot IMO. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333447 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 06:39:52 +0000 looch 2333447@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When I was living closer to my inlaws, we'd see them about two times a month, for a few days at a time. I'd make a 2 hour trip, on 3 trains with my big stroller and bags to arrive on Thursday and stay the weekend, basically.</p> <p>My mother in law loved it and it gave me a break from being the primary care taker during the day. It was great to have another set of hands and I basically didn't have to do any housework or prepare any meals, it was almost like being on vacation! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333444 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 06:37:10 +0000 catomd00 2333444@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Every 2-3 weeks assuming you're alternating driving. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-often-is-reasonable-to-see-grandparents#post-2333433 Mon, 26 Oct 2015 06:02:24 +0000 MamaCate 2333433@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My ILs are two hours away. How much we see them depends on how busy we both are, but I voted six times a year. I would say that is about average and includes both sides doing the driving. But there are times we go up as often as three times in six weeks (once for a visit after a plane flight, once for a work training where MIL babysat my LO, once for a visit) or go several months.</p> <p>When they come to us they are helpful and will treat us to lunch rather than expecting to be entertained. </p>