https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 01 May 2026 09:16:49 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64449 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 21:58:54 +0000 CarrieLouWho 64449@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Keppa - This is kind of what I'm worried about. My friends are the same way... loving, but can definitely be nosy. We are going to NYC, and we always split a bottle of good wine for dinner, which is what I'm thinking about.<br /> That stinks that you had to tell your friends that way. That's definitely a worry of mine.<br /> Thanks again everyone! I do tend to overthink, but it's so new figuring out how to handle this stuff!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64414 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 21:26:09 +0000 Mrs. Oyster 64414@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like #2 for good friends.</p> <p>When I was only 5 weeks along I went on a girl's weekend that was planned before I found out I was pregnant. Normally not a big deal, but this one was planned as a wine tasting weekend (oops!). I tried the whole "I'm on a medication that requires me not to drink" bit - but both of my friends are incredibly nosy and one of them is a nurse who insisted on knowing what meds. I had a medication in mind, but she promptly told me I could drink small amounts on it and be fine (ughhh). Why can't people leave well enough alone sometimes??<br /> I ended up alone with my other girlfriend at the bar one night and ordered a N/A mixer. She adamantly refused to drink unless I got something and made things very awkward. I finally, angrily, told her why I couldn't drink and even though it was nice to have her in-the-know - I'm still annoyed that they couldn't just drop it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64221 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 19:25:13 +0000 Mrs.M57 64221@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@winniebe- i did similar in early pregnancy, at a wedding reception i secretly ordered cranberry and vodka sans vodka, and made sure to ask for the lime so it looked more real!</p> <p>I would go with #2 though as well a good way to add in the ttc </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64142 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 18:41:05 +0000 winniebee 64142@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It was hard. But then again, I socialize with friends often and that socializing usually entails a few glasses of wine.</p> <p>In early pregnancy, I usually ordered "vodka sodas" but secretly asked the waitress or bartender to hold the vodka. Smaller settings are tough, but you would be surprised how many people really won't notice if you aren't drinking. You could always pour yourself some wine and take it to the bathroom to dump a little. Or, if it's beer, you can dump out the beer and put water in it and drink it. </p> <p>#2 is a good option, though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64139 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 18:38:58 +0000 PennyLainne 64139@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I went to a stagette and I poured my own drinks all night and all I put in was ginger ale... No one even knew the difference.. And if any one asks why you arn't drinking too much just say that your not feeling 100%. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64138 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 18:38:34 +0000 betsyboop 64138@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think #2 is a great option.<br /> I found the social drinking thing really tough when I was in my 1st trimester. I even went to a wedding at 8 weeks - 10 minutes into cocktail hour, a "friend" confronted me in front of 7 or 8 other people asking me why I wasn't drinking, started giggling, and then said "You're pregnant, aren't you????" SO AWKWARD. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64114 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 18:28:33 +0000 MrsH 64114@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You could just tell them you aren't feeling it or are watching what you eat/drink lately. Neither are a lie. I'm a horrible liar/my cheeks flush when I get uncomfortable sometimes so I'm not sure how I'm going to handle this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64089 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 18:18:12 +0000 mamimami 64089@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am a bad liar. At one event (a work-related WINE TASTING) I faked sips. But with my friends, I just ordered non-alcoholic things. One noticed and called me out, and you know what? It was fine. I swore her to secrecy of course, but it was fine. </p> <p>You asked if you were overthinking, and I'm afraid you might be! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64082 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 18:15:28 +0000 MegWag 64082@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This was just never really an issue for me. I can't imagine a situation where me not drinking (granted, I'm not a huge drinker to begin with... but still) would be a big deal. I think if you don't make a big deal of it and gloss over it, others won't care.<br /> Whenever I see these types of threads I just really can't understand why the act of simply not having a drink needs to be "spun", but maybe it's just a difference in lifestyle/friendships. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-64057 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 17:59:36 +0000 sulli301 64057@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is hard! I feel your pain because my DH's family always has beer with dinner, etc so it was a bit hard for me but I managed. Same with coffee! I just would say I was tired or "Oh, nope, had a couple last night..." etc. Actually, funny side-note, we attended the wedding of a friend towards the end of my first trimester, well we didn't want to steal any spotlight by telling people so I was sipping on diet pop &amp; lemonade but one of DHs friends knew &amp; was like "ohhh good" when he realized it was a virgin drink. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63843 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 13:55:36 +0000 CarrieLouWho 63843@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks everyone for your opinions! I think I just needed to hash it out and I tend to be an opinion gatherer. They are my closest girlfriends, so they will definitely be paying attention to the drinking. So, I'll probably go with some variation of #2 and I agree with @Cameron'sMomma - to say that I don't want to go into too much detail and not to ask every month, that I'll give them an update when there is one to give. They will be super excited about TTC though, so that should be good. </p> <p>For more social situations, @Rubies idea is great! I hadn't thought of that. I've avoided a happy hour last week with some old co-workers b/c I wasn't sure how to handle the situation... now I have a plan! </p> <p>@ArtBee - I am sooooo terrified that I'm going mc. I'm trying so hard to be positive, but it's definitely in the back of my mind too. That's also why we want to wait a while to tell everyone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63731 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:35:19 +0000 FancyGem 63731@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would just say that I'm TTC and can't drink. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63728 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:32:00 +0000 tlcbaby 63728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I did something similar to what @Rubies did - I would just pour a very small drink of wine and my husband would sneak drinks so I would just drink a little bit.</p> <p>I faked sick one other instance.</p> <p>And I had a very nice bartender one night who made me fake drinks that looked quite fancy! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63707 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:18:43 +0000 Boogs 63707@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Could you order virgin mixed drinks without tipping them off? Otherwise, if you are comfortable sharing #2 is your best bet so you don't have to watch what you eat. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63685 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:07:20 +0000 kml636 63685@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This was really hard for me. </p> <p>I told some people I was on a diet &amp; couldn't drink. </p> <p>When I felt it was unavoidable (work function where I knew people would say "Your'e pregnant"!) I got one drink which I took a few sips of. But in the end, I was so uncomfortable, I wish I wouldn't have gone at all. This go round, I'm thinking of just not going to any events where everyone else will be drinking. It's not a good solution, but I don't want to feel uncomfortable or pressured to drink. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63679 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 12:04:07 +0000 tequiero21 63679@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i think #2 is good. if they even ask! i usually say i'm the designated driver lol. but then, i'm not a big drinker to begin with so no one would really notice if i didn't drink. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63666 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 11:57:46 +0000 CameronsMomma 63666@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd tell them you're TTC but that it's a sensitive subject and you're not ready to discuss it but treating your body the best you can. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63610 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 11:20:43 +0000 mediagirl 63610@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like #2 if they're good friends. Let them know what you've been through. You don't have to let them know you're pregnant yet that way. They'll be so excited for you, they won't worry if you're pregnant or not then they'll be SUPER excited when you do tell them! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63609 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 11:19:25 +0000 LuLu Mom 63609@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had this this weekend when I found out (only 4-5 weeks along as well) I did tell my best friend howver no one else at the table knew. I had a NA beer in front of me so I had a few sips out of that, otherwise my friend would switch me glasses with her near empty one to put in front of me so no one woudl notice my cup wasn't getting lower. I don't think anyone picked up on it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63607 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 11:18:13 +0000 heffalump 63607@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Personally I wouldn't want to do #2. Just in case anything happened to the baby.... then they'd constantly be asking if you were pregnant and it would probably just make you very upset. I miscarried so I'm very paranoid about that.</p> <p>I would either say the diet thing or that you have a headache/you've been getting headaches so you're trying to stay away from wine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63583 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 10:47:09 +0000 PastaAndPotato 63583@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>are these your very close girlfriends? i would go with your option #2, or, if you're still not comfortable discussing it, i like @Rubies: suggestion of getting a half glass of wine and just having it handy - once dinner starts and everyone gets talking, no one will notice that you're not drinking as quickly as everyone else (or at all!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63571 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 10:31:33 +0000 cascademom 63571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like using the medication one. I have a work social event coming up, so then I'm going to fake a drink then and make sure that the waitress knows. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63564 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 10:23:03 +0000 Shutterbug 63564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe just say you have a headache and don't want to add to it with wine? Or will that not work two days in a row? :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63524 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 09:53:46 +0000 Mrsbells 63524@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would just say I'm on medication and cant drink. You dont have to give details. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63520 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 09:52:33 +0000 Adira 63520@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I also really like #2! It's pretty safe since you know you're pregnant and is a very good excuse! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63513 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 09:46:48 +0000 Rubies 63513@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had half a glass of wine poured for me and took fake sips here and there...After the meal was well underway, it was easy to not drink and not be noticed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63511 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 09:45:26 +0000 Andrea 63511@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think #2 sounds like a great idea since you know you're already pregnant! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-avoid-drinking-wout-saying-that-youre-pregnant#post-63508 Tue, 31 Jan 2012 09:43:14 +0000 CarrieLouWho 63508@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Bee’s I need your help. Since we are only 4-5 weeks pregnant, DH and I decided to wait till closer to the end of the first trimester to tell our friends. We’re going to tell our parents in 3 weeks probably. Also, we haven’t told any of our friends that we were TTC, mostly b/c I didn’t want to deal with people asking every month if we were pregnant (glad we did that too, b/c it’s been 15 months). </p> <p>So, here’s the dilemma. This weekend I’m going with my 2 best friends to visit another friend out of state. She just had her baby in October and we haven’t had a chance to go see her &amp; the baby yet. Well, I’m usually one that drinks wine with dinner and I know my girls will be drinking this weekend. I’m trying to figure out how to say I’m not drinking without saying I’m pregnant. I don’t like the “I’m on antibiotics and can’t mix alcohol” b/c everyone knows that means you’re preggo.<br /> Here are my 2 thoughts:</p> <p>1 – I did a detox diet in the fall to help lose weight. I could say that I’m doing that again… but that means I’d have to be super careful about other stuff that I eat while with them (no bread/carbs, no red meat, etc). </p> <p>2 – Tell them that we’ve been TTC for a while and I’m on Clomid and can’t drink. This lets them in on the fact that we’ve been trying without telling them that we are pregnant. Also, when we do announce that we’re pregnant, it won’t take them by complete shock (not that it would, we’re 28 &amp; 35…so babies aren’t a shocker).<br /> Am I over-thinking this? Any other suggestions? </p>