https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 28 Apr 2026 01:33:56 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309232 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 23:48:04 +0000 daniellemybelle 1309232@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Everyone is different - visitors, even close friends, gave me anxiety for about 6 weeks. I would err on the safe side and make visits short &amp; sweet. Bring fresh fruit &amp; easy snacks. We had way too much "food-food" &amp; not enough easy stuff! Ask how nursing is going &amp; make lactation cookies if she's worried about supply at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309211 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 23:29:24 +0000 sandy 1309211@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just drop off a meal and maybe a short visit but like others said I wasn't up for entertaining for the first 2 months </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309187 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 23:10:58 +0000 FaithFertility 1309187@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@runnerd: that actually makes its easier I think...... we would go over time to time and have dinner and chat, and she didn't feel guilty for having me over and her DH got some guy time in too with my DH as well!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309182 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 23:07:21 +0000 mlm2934 1309182@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@FaithFertility: we have same relationship, her DH is also my DH's best friend </p> <p>Thanks for the advice guys! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309159 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 22:56:13 +0000 FaithFertility 1309159@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My best friend had her baby and she was in the NICU fkr two weeks :((( heartbreaking! I would text and all what she needed, I bought over dinner and when LO came home me and DH just let v them know time and time again, we were here for anything ad her DH is my DH best friend too!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309111 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 22:28:36 +0000 Grace 1309111@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Food! I also really loved the company because I found it lonely by myself. Not everyone is like that, so make sure you ask. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309088 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 22:18:34 +0000 littlecasita1122 1309088@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I preferred more bonding time with just me, my husband and LO for the first few weeks so we kept visitors to a minimum. However, I would have loved if friends offered to come over for dinner and just held the baby so my husband and I could have eaten together at least once a week.</p> <p>If you do food, I would recommend bringing muffins, snacks, easy on-the-go items. One friend prepared a couple crock-pot meals for us which was great (she basically threw all the ingredients in a zip-lock bag and then we stored in the fridge until we were ready to make it).</p> <p>Always check in a couple hours before you're supposed to visit to make sure your estimated arrival time is still good. I was not comfortable nursing in public and I felt like people would always show up in the middle of a nursing session. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309075 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 22:06:30 +0000 Corduroy 1309075@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't want any visitors the first week but when I was ready I would have loved:<br /> -friends to announce that they are totally cool with me nursing in front of them. I'm going to do it anyway so don't make me wonder if you care. If your friend wants privacy for nursing insist on being the one to leave the room. New moms often have a "nursing station" set up. Don't sit in it or make her feel like she needs to move from it for any reason. If she's comfortable nursing in front of you bring her water &amp; snacks.<br /> -cookies &amp; hand held food<br /> -Once DH went back to work I would have loved someone to offer to come to Target or BRU with me. Some of those early trips were so daunting.<br /> -Texts saying "hi" but not with a lot of questions or expectations of responses. It seems so easy to respond to a text but in the early days it wasn't easy at all for me.</p> <p>Every new mom is different so just arm yourself with lots of ways to be helpful and I'm sure you'll be appreciated. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309069 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:57:57 +0000 cmomma17 1309069@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@runnerd: the best friends were the ones who texted well in advance to figure out a good time (in our case, early in the day was awesome, late afternoon and evening were a nightmare!), stopped by, didn't stay long at all, told me I looked great, and left delicious food! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309043 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:45:53 +0000 Mrsjets 1309043@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Food! Casseroles, rotisserie chickens, salads, or party food like cheese, meat, crackers, veggies, fruit ect were awesome as food always sat around a bit before I got to it. </p> <p>My sisters, mom and MIL just cleaned without asking - I really appreciated it. Also, I had a grocery list that my BFF went out and got for me (with my cc) a couple times since my 3rd degree cut made walking impossible.</p> <p>I liked company to leave around the hour mark the first 2 weeks - unless they were doing something for us of course! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309010 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:34:05 +0000 Rescuemom10 1309010@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yup I agree with the food. I like to make a couple meals. Something that they just have to throw in the oven that's ready to bake or even something that can be thrown in the freezer for later. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1309000 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:31:49 +0000 matador84 1309000@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely organize or arrange meals. If it's a really close friend, I totally wouldn't care if they did the laundry. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308993 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:28:09 +0000 skibobrown 1308993@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with food and holding baby while you shower or nap. Also, some people might not want their stuff touched, but I would have loved anyone to just tidy up a little bit. Wash the dishes in the sink or get the piles of random baby crap back into some semblance of order. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308984 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:24:35 +0000 mrs.shinerbock 1308984@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wanted people to come visit. Especially after DH went back to work, but too early to start taking her out places. And food is great. Especially things I could eat one-handed and didn't have to really prepare.</p> <p>When my sister ca me home with her twins, what she really wanted was some one to come hold a baby so she could get things done. With two, it seemed that one of them was always crying to be held, so she couldn't do anything but hold babies for the first few months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308980 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:22:10 +0000 Cara M. 17 1308980@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wanted to be alone with my baby and DH while we bonded and breastfed around the clock. I did really appreciate the few times that family brought us food, heated it up, and held her while we ate. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308971 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:17:28 +0000 ALV91711 1308971@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Food definitely. Also some tidying up would be nice. Don't ask what she wants done though as she may just say nothing. Just grab the broom and sweep or wash some dishes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308969 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:16:56 +0000 coastmama 1308969@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wanted to show off my baby! We had recently moved to a new city at the time, so most of my friends were far off and I missed having them around. I would have loved for someone to come and watch the baby so I could have napped or showered or even run an errand. That would have been amazing. When LO was 6 weeks old, I did have two friends come visit and they kept LO one night so me and my husband could go out to a nice dinner. I really appreciated it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308967 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:15:56 +0000 Beyond2 1308967@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't really want any company other than my mom, but I did really appreciate a quick drop off of meals from friends. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308963 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:13:41 +0000 MamaMoose 1308963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh I wanted my friends around me as much as possible. Especially if they brought me food!!! I found adjusting to motherhood to be a lonely time for me because I was battling a lot of anxiety. Having my best friends visit really helped keep my spirits up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308953 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 21:08:05 +0000 MapleMoose 1308953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Food that can be eaten with one hand and quickly heated up (or no heating required like sandwiches). Or ask if they are craving any takeout. Also muffins or oatmeal chocolate chip cookies make excellent snacks for those night wakeups with baby. </p> <p>As for guests, DH and I got to the point where we actually had to take a break from visitors because people just kept coming and we were exhausted and trying to bond with our new baby. Keeping guests entertained and the house presentable was really not on our list of priorities at that point. Plus visitors just wanted to stay and hang around. It would have been better if they had stopped by with food and had a short visit and then took off (after making sure we were all set). It was so awkward having to keep leaving the room to go try to breastfeed or pump. If the visits were shorter I could have avoided that. My mom came to do laundry, chores, and watch the baby so we could nap so those things were all set and guests didn't have to do that. I would have been so stressed having visitors over while trying to keep the house clean. Don't think I could have tolerated all those guests if it weren't for my mom! I had a second degree tear so I was out of commission for a while. DH and my mom kept the house running. Also my brothers came and walked our dog which was great.</p> <p>ETA: Bring food in disposable containers that you don't care about getting back. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308795 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 20:02:51 +0000 Smurfette 1308795@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Meals!! I didn't want a lot of company since R wanted to nurse all the time. But we got like two meals and more would have been so awesome. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308793 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 20:02:22 +0000 Foodnerd81 1308793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Food, that is quick and easy to prepare (by prepare I mean heating in the oven or microwave), and in disposable cookware so the mom doesn't have to wash it and keep track of whose is whose. And once Dh went back to work having someone come over just to chat was really nice. If it was someone I saw multiple times per week I'm sure I'd want to see them soon.<br /> I would just text and say you want to bring some food over, let you know when is a good time. I felt bad asking people to come over when I wanted company. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308790 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 20:00:38 +0000 Ash 1308790@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wanted to be left alone - I didn't want to try entertaining while trying to adjust to mommyhood. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308789 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 20:00:22 +0000 Mamasig 1308789@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Bring food and offer to watch the baby so she can nap or take a shower! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308786 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 19:59:09 +0000 mrsbookworm 1308786@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Offer to hold the baby while mom takes a shower/nap. I would have really appreciated that instead of having to "entertain" visitors! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308778 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 19:55:14 +0000 avivoca 1308778@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Bring food. We did not have the time nor the brainpower to prepare meals, only to heat them up. I also wish more people had offered or insisted on doing chores around the house. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308771 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 19:52:21 +0000 regberadaisy 1308771@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it's someone I'm super close to that I see several times per week I would expect them to visit me ASAP. :) </p> <p>One of the best things ours friend would do is come over with takeout and even clean up afterwards! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308770 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 19:52:16 +0000 swedishfish 1308770@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Everyone's different but I really only wanted my close family around often. I really appreciated food though. It was next to impossible to cook early on. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308767 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 19:51:37 +0000 deerylou 1308767@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I tried to do everything, myself. Totally screwed myself on that front, ha! I wish more people would have insisted, and told me to shut up.</p> <p>Help with meal preparation and laundry would have been most helpful! I wanted space while my husband was on leave, but relished in company once he returned to work. Just having someone to chat with and share tea was really nice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-be-helpful-to-new-mom#post-1308757 Mon, 30 Dec 2013 19:47:21 +0000 mlm2934 1308757@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My best friend just come home from hospital with babies. Despite spending the last year trying to get pregnant, I have zero experience with babies/new moms as adult. What help did you most want/appreciate from your close friends, even if you wouldn't have asked. </p> <p>How much space did you want from people you normally see multiple times per week? </p>