https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 22 May 2026 05:14:20 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-308155 Mon, 24 Sep 2012 13:36:00 +0000 heffalump 308155@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bree72: We got lucky with my LO's night time sleep, she was always a great night time sleeper and slept 12 hours by 2 1/2 months. Nap time was a different story.... she was an awful napper and I'd always have to move her and do stroller, car, swing, etc. We also didn't feel comfortable with CIO and just dealt with it. Then one day when she was 8 months DH stuck her in her crib and she fell asleep, no tears. She's been a great crib napper ever since! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-308146 Mon, 24 Sep 2012 13:32:43 +0000 cvbee 308146@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BeachMama: I'll update too: we did CIO. Now I can even put him down wide awake at an appropriate nap/bed time and he goes to sleep himself. It worked really well for us, but a month ago I was very against CIO for us. Keep following your instinct for what is best! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-308145 Mon, 24 Sep 2012 13:32:10 +0000 BananaPancakes 308145@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@artbee: I think this is how I'm going to handle it. I don't mind rocking him to sleep after a bottle at all, and I'm sure I'll miss it when he grows out of it. </p> <p>I don't think I can do cry it out, and, *knock on wood*, his sleep is getting better, so hopefully we won't have to. I do try to jostle him a little when I transfer him to his crib, though, so he wakes up a bit and realizes he's in his crib. If I set him down totally passed out, he'll wake up in 30 minutes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-308065 Mon, 24 Sep 2012 12:55:01 +0000 LAGS 308065@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO used to fall asleep on her own pretty well but that went to hell during the whole sleep regression thing. I found myself rocking her into a dead sleep at every nap and at night. It got to a point where she needed more and more rocking and was getting more and more pissed when waking up after I put her down so I knew it needed to stop. </p> <p>What I'll do is rock her until drowsy and put her down and wiggle her, or rub her head or tummy. At first she always got mad when I put her down so it basically took a lot of picking her back up, rocking her until calm and drowsy again, putting her back down. I just repeated as much as necessary. After a few days of this I can put her down once and usually don't need to do more than stroke her head and shush a little before leaving. My LO is stubborn, but I'm sure there are others who could put her to shame so it might not work for all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-308055 Mon, 24 Sep 2012 12:52:10 +0000 meredithNYC 308055@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BeachMama: Sounds like you are doing great! I was going to chime in and say that LO is 17 weeks and we have been sleep training since about 12 or 13 weeks, after having one hellish week of very little daytime sleep.</p> <p>I was never opposed to CIO so perhaps it was easier for me that way? I am also lucky in that LO very rarely loses it for longer than say, 10 minutes. If she does I will go in and comfort her and, if needed, try and put her down again later after she has settled.</p> <p>I know there are opposing viewpoints on this matter, but do not let yourself feel bad for doing CIO. Think of all the babies whose parents did CIO. I'm sorry, but I just don't believe that they are all damaged adults. On the other hand, if you find that it absolutely does not work for your baby, don't feel bad for abandoning it. You have to do what's best for you, but I totally feel you on the need for sleep (for both baby AND mom!). It's so important! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-308050 Mon, 24 Sep 2012 12:51:21 +0000 heffalump 308050@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, I never did the drowsy but awake when my LO was little. If she fell asleep when she was eating (which she almost always did) I wasn't going to mess with it. Eventually she just stopped falling asleep and I did put her in her crib drowsy but awake as she got older, and it wasn't an issue. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-308020 Mon, 24 Sep 2012 12:39:57 +0000 BeachMama 308020@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Update - I've been able to put LO down when she was still awake 3 times and she's fallen asleep. Granted, it's not consistent but it was a great moment for me to realize that she COULD do it. The first time was after being frustrated with her trying to nap, I just set her down to cry so I could get a break. Ten minutes later, she was passed out. Two other times I've been able to rock her till she's sleepy then set her down and she'll cry for a minute or so then pass out. Of course, there have been quite a few other times that I tried to let her cry and it just got worse and worse. Still a work in progress! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293243 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:50:39 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 293243@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We could put her down wide awake until she lost interest in her pacifier. Now that she refuses a pacifier at 4 months and can't really soothe herself, she needs to be rocked our bounced to sleep. I don't mind though. She is only gonna be a baby for such a short amount of time and I love the quiet moments in her nursery when I am putting her down. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293191 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:21:40 +0000 Mrs. Pen 293191@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cvbee: aw thanks! It's crazy how much you can learn in just 6 months of a baby's life!! I should write a book ;) bahaha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293188 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:20:33 +0000 cvbee 293188@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: I love all your tips! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293185 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:18:52 +0000 cvbee 293185@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BeachMama: My fix was to wait longer before putting him down for a nap. I know the experts say the opposite but my experience says this. For example, this morning it was 2.5 hours before his 1st nap. Now he's been napping for an hour and twenty minutes and counting. When I was putting him down 'at the first sign of sleepiness' (which was much earlier) he was only sleeping 45 minutes. You will have to keep experimenting. Good luck! (And as I said earlier, I've only figured out naps, not how to keep him from waking up in the first hour of bedtime....putting him down earlier or later for bedtime doesn't seem to make a difference yet there). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293180 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:16:26 +0000 Mrs. Pen 293180@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BeachMama: yeah that's what Cobi did. He nursed to sleep, but would wake up within 20 minutes. That continued until he learned to fall asleep on his own, then he started sleeping really long stretches (anywhere from 6-11.5 hours!). Could you try the gradual nursing to sleep? Break the latch just before she starts to doze off and lay her down. Keep your arms cradled around her until she falls asleep and then gently ease your arms up.<br /> Do that for a few days, then break the latch a little earlier, and cradle her in the crib for a little while (yes - this is extremely hard on the back - but hopefully you will only have to do it for a week or two).<br /> Continue this progression. If she regresses, start over but never nurse her fully to sleep or you'll be back where you were. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293176 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:15:08 +0000 LivsMama 293176@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BeachMama: I totally feel your pain. I think we started sleep training right after the 4 month sleep regression. I even started a topic on it at the time lol (shes almost 14 months now.) CIO was the ONLY thing that worked for us. People think Im evil for it, but its not like I let her scream for hours. HEres a tip-you know the difference between angry screams and sleepy wails and the screams that are hysterical and inconsolable. Id go in for those hysterical ones and pick her up and calm her down, but the others I just let go. Its hard, but it gets easier, and it took literally 3 days for her to only cry for less than a minute. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293175 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:15:07 +0000 cvbee 293175@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: good call on the warm blanket thing. I actually just started putting a blanket in the crib under him because I noticed that the crib sheet was cold on his head (even if he was in a sleep sack the head is sticking out and touches the cold crib sheet). Or I have the blanket on him as we nurse so he is part of the blanket package on the way into the crib. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293173 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:14:35 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 293173@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BeachMama: @Sandy wrote an excellent description of what she did. It was such a help for us and I've gone back to it numerous times. (It's the 12th entry)</p> <p><a href="http://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-do-before-sleep-training" rel="nofollow">http://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-do-before-sleep-training</a></p> <p>Good luck to you!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293169 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:13:09 +0000 birdieputt 293169@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>it's hard to do "drowsy but awake" if she is overtired. infants under 4 months old shouldn't be up for more than 2 hours at a time. as soon as your baby starts looking drowsy, do your bedtime/nap routine and put her down BEFORE she is overtired. </p> <p>babies are able to learn how to self-soothe by the time they are 4 months old (age adjusted). try offering a pacifier or a lovey if that will help her self-soothe when you first put her down. swaddling and white noise are also great. also check her sleep environment - consider getting room darkening shades. if she is still not settling down, then you might want to consider sleep training her (i.e. CIO) if you are comfortable with that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293163 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:11:31 +0000 BeachMama 293163@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cvbee @cocobee - I've been nursing to sleep but lately it hasn't been working. Shell fall asleep on the boob, I'll transfer to the crib and 5 minutes later she's awake again. Maybe this is part of the 4 month regression? So I've had to bounce her to sleep more lately which is killing my back. </p> <p>She's also been waking earlier from naps (30 min) and will sometimes go back to sleep if I bounce her again. I'm just getting worried she's getting too depended on it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293159 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:11:13 +0000 winniebee 293159@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: Great post : ) </p> <p>I usually have to do one pick up after we put DS in his crib (he basically nurses to sleep...) He cries and cries and I pick him up and hold him a little, maybe feed him a little more, burp him and then put him back down. The second soothe I do not pick him up unless he is hysterical. Usually I can go in, put my hand on his belly, stroke his head, put on the mobile and offer a sucker and he'll get calm and go to sleep. Not perfect, but getting there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293154 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 10:10:23 +0000 Mrs. Pen 293154@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cvbee: hahaha well I have big boobs lol but also his mattress is still at the highest it can be.<br /> Oh and his crib isn't very tall either, just above waist level for me. AND I am tall, 5'8, so that might make it easier lol.</p> <p>A variation I used to do was hold him away from my body over the crib so that he didn't fall asleep because of the warmth/closeness of my body. That is a huge reason babes wake up when you put them down - all of a sudden they lost their heat source and it startles/scares them. </p> <p>My midwife suggested putting a blanket in the dryer, then right when you are ready to lay them down, put them on the blanket. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293123 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:59:40 +0000 cvbee 293123@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: that is hopeful about the progression that you took with the drowsy---thanks! Whoa! boob draping?! Either you are a gymnast or your crib/boob situation is way different from mine. I don't think I could get my boob down there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293121 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:57:57 +0000 Mrsbells 293121@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are working on this too, but we are doing it in stages. For now When she is drowsy but awake I put her on a pillow on our bed and then put her pacifier in her mouth. She doesnt feel as alone as when she is in her crib, so she relaxes, sometimes plays a little and then sleeps. Once she is asleep I transfer her to her crib. Eventually I will transition to putting her directly in her crib. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293120 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:56:59 +0000 Mrs. Pen 293120@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cvbee: that's how we did it too! We always nursed to sleep. Then gradually I would lay him down while he wasn't fully in his milk coma, but mostly, and he'd usually drift off. Now I can give him some milk, and while he's still wide awake lay him down, he will coo, roll over and go to sleep. Sometimes there is some fussing but he is so good about it now. I'm sure you'll be able to continue working your way up to it.</p> <p>There were many times I would literally drape myself over the crib and dangle my boob in his mouth with him laying in his crib so that he could actually fall asleep in his crib. Crazy - but it works!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293115 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:54:41 +0000 Mrs. Pen 293115@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Cobi was the same way... I think that method is often called the put down pick up method, and there is a similar one called the sleep lady shuffle. Both are supposed to be "no cry" options and very gentle and soothing, but Cobi just felt betrayed and emotionally hurt. He would look at me with sad, sad eyes and just bawl, big tears rolling down his cheeks. It was heartbreaking. </p> <p>It never worked for us either until Cobi was 6 months, then we started sleep training and it was still hard, but now we're over the worst of it. We found out he only responded to the extinction method. I hate the idea of it, it sounds so cold, but he would only get angry if we were next to him and doing nothing. He would calm down the second I picked him back up.</p> <p>I wouldn't have done the extinction method before 6 months though. I think anytime earlier is too young.</p> <p>I think that your best bet is to just keep trying every few days or once a week or so. </p> <p>Ultimately this is such a short time in your life right now - she will only need you for so long. I now look back on all the months Cobi slept on me, the long nights I rocked him in my arms and forfeited sleep for me - I don't regret one night. I was tired, sure, but it was so. worth. it. I would give a million bucks to relive those nights of holding my precious sleeping baby who NEEDED me. Now? He won't sleep in my arms. He thinks it's play time if he's with me. It makes me sad! </p> <p>It took me awhile to get to that place where I was HAPPY doing it, I had to realize there was a little human who needed me. He needed ME, he wanted me. He felt comforted by me - now how awesome does that make you feel?! I couldn't amount that feeling to anything. It was priceless. </p> <p>I hope you find a solution soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293108 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:51:41 +0000 cvbee 293108@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BeachMama: I'm not totally there yet, but I switched from movement to sleep (which, at 16-plus pounds was getting literally tiring for me) to nursing before sleep. My body thanks me. I find when he's got the magic milk in his tummy (and I'm not putting him to sleep too early) then he can do drowsy-to-sleep no problem for naps. </p> <p>For night time I'm still nursing to sleep but expect that it should work since it works for naps....I'm just too chicken to try yet, as we've had bedtime issues lately (4 month sleep regression). </p> <p>Mine is also one who gets more upset with crying and does not calm when 'comforted without picking up'. A major key for me is not putting him down too early though, because for a while I was trying not to go too long before putting him down for a nap, and then even the 'magic milk' wasn't working, he'd cry and I'd be back to breaking my back to movement him to sleep. </p> <p>Now that I wait longer the magic milk works every time. I nurse til his eyes are closed, but his hands are still moving and I break his latch when he switches to shallow sucking and transfer him to the crib. His eyes do open and his arms squirm a bit, but I put a blanket on him and his eyes close and he settles to sleep. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293104 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:47:44 +0000 winniebee 293104@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Subscribing to this thread..... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293097 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:39:25 +0000 BeachMama 293097@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@livsmama -yeah I'm sure we are going to do some sort of CIO because I'm exhausted she also won't take a bottle very well so I do all night feelings, which is 2-3 at this point. It's going to be hard to keep up with when I return to work. She's still too young/little to sleep train but hopefully in a month or so. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293076 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:24:13 +0000 LivsMama 293076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Liv was the same way. If I went in and touched her or just shushed her, she got piiiiiiiiiiiiissed. Honestly, the drowsy but awae thing didnt work for us until like 7 or 8 months. And even up until now, I nurse or rock her to sleep, and she wakes up during the transfer to the crib. Usually she stands up and looks at me, then lays back down and falls to sleep. It did take some crying .I was VERY anti-CIO, but Id had enough one day and over the course of the following 3 days, she figured it out on her own with CIO. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-do-drowsy-but-awake#post-293044 Thu, 13 Sep 2012 09:09:32 +0000 BeachMama 293044@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO was pretty colicky and fussy the first 4-5 weeks. She literally wouldn't let me put her down or she'd start screaming. So she got bounced/rocked to sleep every night. There was NO way that "drowsy but awake" would work with her. Now she's 16 weeks and still needs movement to fall asleep (and swaddle and white noise). And I'm getting tired of it! But anytime I try to put her down drowsy her eyes pop wide open and she starts crying. </p> <p>How did you start the "drowsy but awake" process? Should I pick her up and comfort her and just keep trying again and again? If I leave her to cry, or if I just try talking to her or patting her she just gets more and more upset </p>