https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 30 Apr 2026 12:38:50 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2638243 Tue, 18 Oct 2016 07:25:41 +0000 kiddosc 2638243@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Goose: I think that sounds pretty good. I wish I knew what kind of questions, if any, that he'll ask. </p> <p>@daniellemybelle: I like that explanation, thank you. I think we'll just bury the box. I'm not sure I want to open it. </p> <p>@MenagerieMama: Thank you. She was mine before I'd even met DH. She was an awesome dog. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2638132 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 20:18:02 +0000 MenagerieMama 2638132@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No advice but she was beautiful. She looks like the combo of my two pups if they had a baby! My heart breaks for you. Fur babies are special. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2638129 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 20:16:21 +0000 Mrs. Goose 2638129@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@daniellemybelle: good idea! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2638119 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 19:56:40 +0000 daniellemybelle 2638119@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think I would skip the burning part and just say, the vet / some people helped us put her body in a smaller box after she died so we could bury her in the yard. Are you planning on actually burying the physical ashes or the box of ashes?</p> <p>EDIT TO ADD: If he asks how, I would just say, "it's a special process called cremation." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2638089 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 18:42:26 +0000 Mrs. Goose 2638089@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Gotcha. Maybe he'll just be okay with limited info like chuckles suggested. You could maybe say that when people or animals die there isn't enough space for them to fit in the earth the size they were so they use heat to shrink them.-so it's not putting the potentially upsetting/scary image of fire in there, but it is effectively explaining what happened and why there is a teeny box. </p> <p>I know when we buried my grandfather's ashes a long time ago now I just separated the two things from each other and thought nothing of it, if that makes sense. Sort of like if you don't think about it it didn't happen. The ashes are just there because that's his body and that's what it's like bow. I know that wouldn't work for a kid because they're often curious. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2638013 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 15:55:56 +0000 kiddosc 2638013@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Goose: He knows what it means to burn something, so I just don't want to put the image of her burning into his head. I generally try to be as honest with him as possible, but I don't even like to think of the idea of her body burning. </p> <p>@Chuckles: I hope that's the case. I just want to be ready with something to say if he asks more questions. </p> <p>@LCTBQE: Thank you. It was really unexpected :sad: </p> <p>@youboots: We've talked about where she has gone spiritually, and how she's going become part of the earth again. It's more handling the question of how she's come to fit into a tiny box. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2638012 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 15:51:48 +0000 psw27 2638012@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No advice, I'm just here to say I'm sorry about your pup. We lost our dog last year and it still sucks! xo. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2637976 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 14:42:37 +0000 youboots 2637976@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My friend liked the book Lifecycles about everyone going back to the earth in death- she read it to her kids when their dog dies. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2637975 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 14:41:33 +0000 LCTBQE 2637975@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No advice for your question, but I'm sorry you lost your doggy, she is beautiful. It's the hardest thing in the world. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2637967 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 14:28:28 +0000 Chuckles 2637967@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry for your loss. Could you start by saying that her body is in the box before going into the ashes part of it? Your LO is old enough that he will probably ask more questions, but it might be a case of kids being satisfied with less information that we expect. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2637911 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 13:39:19 +0000 Mrs. Goose 2637911@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sorry for your loss. </p> <p>Do you think you could just explain the whole thing honestly? Saying that both people and animals are buried when they die, either in a coffin or in a small box as ashes and it doesn't hurt at all. I know it's not the same thing, but I candidly explained my csection to my 4.5 year old niece last year because we were talking about babies and her birth and my daughter's which were totally different from each other. </p> <p>Obviously you know your child best and know if it will scare him or not, but I don't see anything wrong with telling him exactly what happened and then moving on from it and letting him do something special for the burial (like burying a dog toy or asking him to say his favourite thing about your dog), hopefully he wouldn't dwell on the burning aspect. It might surprise you how easily kids accept things and understand things. Just my thoughts... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-explain-cremation#post-2637699 Mon, 17 Oct 2016 08:49:14 +0000 kiddosc 2637699@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We lost our sweet Callie-dog this summer and have her ashes. I plan to bury them in our yard with a stone marker. I'd like to do this before it gets too cold and the ground freezes since I don't want to hold on to her ashes all winter. </p> <p>I'd like to have E be part of her burial, he's 4.5. I know that if I tell him they're ashes that he'll ask additional questions, but I don't want to freak him out and tell him that her body was burned. How should I explain what we are burying?</p> <p>And a picture, because I miss her so much... </p> [attach=1439/16/of72e2.206x274.callie.jpg]