https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 29 Apr 2026 03:19:13 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897611 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 21:56:17 +0000 mrsbubbletea 2897611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I need to work both smarter and harder. I am so overwhelmed by my to do list at all times that I just sort of get the bare minimum done and feel cranky and stressed out all the time. Essentially a SAHM with two kids 4 and 2. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897587 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 15:25:24 +0000 graceandjoy 2897587@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oops I meant to say expecting #3 above :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897579 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 14:08:22 +0000 LadyDi 2897579@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I SAH and I have three under the age of 4 and my youngest is only 3 months, so I totally understand how you feel. Especially with wanting them to be older. I don't want to wish time away, especially not my last snuggly baby, but I do look forward to a little more self-sufficiency from them. </p> <p>I don't have much advice, just wanted to say solidarity! I feel stretched pretty thin most days. I try to make a plan on Sunday for the week and try to make one goal for various parts of my life (ex: cleaning goal: clean the bathrooms, children goal: make DS a dr appt, self-care goal: go to yoga one night, etc). I try to batch cook on weekends if I can, or at least do some meal prep. In the mornings after the kids have breakfast I get everyone dressed, the baby usually naps so I put the older two in their bedroom to play while I clean up from breakfast, finish emptying the dishwasher, and then I start prepping lunch. I try to keep up with the kitchen during the day so I don't get overwhelmed later...this means that our meals are usually pretty simple and repetitive. I try to clean up toy clutter before nap time and my 4 yo is old enough to help with that now. I only do laundry on Sundays unless there is some kind of major blowout and DH helps with that. I sadly can't afford a cleaning person right now (we used to have one when I was working and it was amazing) so cleaning the house has really slipped since having my third. I think I might try to set up some regular grandparent time during the week to tackle cleaning. If you have parents or family nearby to ask for help, definitely do it! Now is the time! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897536 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 08:52:51 +0000 graceandjoy 2897536@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel you! Although you definitely have way more on your plate than I do! We're expecting #2 and with two working parents, limited budget (so no one cleaning my house for me!), it's definitely a lot of work and I feel overwhelmed a lot too. </p> <p>I think sitting down and listing out everything that goes on, and seeing what the priorities are will help. Over the years since kids, I've lowered my expectations A TON on non-priority things. DH &amp; I just split up the work how it make sense the most, not necessary just to be even. </p> <p>And these early years, I really just have zero me time and rarely and date nights. BUT having some order to the household and our lives do give me sanity. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897531 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 07:52:57 +0000 Ajsmommy 2897531@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just want to say kudos to you!!! I only have 2 LO's and i feel like i am drowning half the time. But i remind myself that it's just a season or a phase. Hang in there! You're doing great. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897528 Mon, 23 Sep 2019 06:36:57 +0000 cyoung 2897528@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you so much! This is all good advice. I’ll definitely try to do these things and see if it helps. As much as I love my kids and this age is fun there are times I can’t wait for them to be older. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897522 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 20:54:24 +0000 annem1990 2897522@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My biggest stress-relief is keeping the house clean. I'm adamant that after every meal and before every nap time/bedtime the whole house is cleaned up. There's never a dish leftover, laundry not done before bed, toys on the floor before nap, etc. It never gets overwhelming that way and it's just been a good habit. Even if I'm exhausted, I will not wake up to a dirty house so the day starts much less stressful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897521 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 20:48:04 +0000 nwm 2897521@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i totally feel you on this, and definitely agree with the advice to give yourself a break and lower your expectations where you can. they will not be this little and needy forever. </p> <p>that said, for me what has helped me feel more ahead of the game is really working to have a routine that accomplishes the things that i really care about and felt like i was letting slide. one of our biggest struggles lately have been evenings, because my son's bedtime was such a mess. i spent a few concerted weeks being a little more rigid about it, and then making a point of spending some time right after he goes down picking up around the house. then, when i sit back down to work in the evenings, i feel much more productive. now i'm working on doing better with morning routines, because i know they could be more efficient.</p> <p>for me i put a lot of stock in routine because it takes the mental energy out of everything. i don't have to wonder what to do next and then double check that i've done everything. sometimes to me that is the biggest battle. of course, little ones love to throw wrenches in routines, but i feel like they are worth the effort of keeping up.</p> <p>we've had minor health and other issues lately that require appointments, so i totally sympathize as well on how much those can interrupt your normal routines. i find it helps where possible to schedule appointments for the same general time so you can have an "appointment day" routine, but of course that's easier said than done. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897518 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 18:58:06 +0000 ALV91711 2897518@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This weekend we batch cooked some foods and I meal prepped for the week. As much as it sucked I know it will help the evenings this week. But now my house is a mess since I didn’t clean. </p> <p>I just went back to work after being home for a year. What I found helped was to have a plan for each day. One chore and one thing fun with my kids and I always made my bed. If I got more done great! And if not that was fine too. Every night after my boys are in bed I try to take 15 for myself. Sometimes I do a mask and sometimes I sit alone in my room doing nothing. This helps me get through anything else I need to do that evening. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897506 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 11:15:55 +0000 Hypatia 2897506@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It’s a hard season of life, truly. The first thing you might want to do is lower your expectations. ;)</p> <p>What’s helped me is making a list and continually revisiting it to evaluate how I can change things. What emotional, physical, and household priorities matter most to me? I try to be specific and not fill it up with more than ten things (five is better). It might have things like:</p> <p>Your son’s speech therapy<br /> A clean kitchen and bathrooms<br /> Self-care on Sunday evenings (husband babysits)<br /> Mother daughter date night on Saturday<br /> Social time—mother’s morning out?</p> <p>After looking at the list, I would try to figure out what I can outsource. Can you afford a cleaning lady once a week? Can you hire a college student to drive your son to his therapy classes? Can your mom come over once every two weeks to watch the kids while you tackle laundry? Can you pump or give formula more often to give yourself a break from the newborn while your husband takes over? Can you have your groceries delivered, or order online and have your husband pick them up?</p> <p>I also like to set myself up for as many “easy victories” as possible. This will vary from person to person...for me, it gives me a sense of accomplishment to make my bed every morning, always have my diaper bag ready to go, have a daily schedule that is flexible but very specific, and meal prep lunches and dinners when I can. The more routine, the less, “What do I do next??” anxiety I have. </p> <p>I think the key might be something like what James Clear talks about in his book, Atomic Habits. You don’t have to change everything overnight. Try to focus on making things 1% easier / better, one task at a time, and all those very small changes will add up to a significant shift. </p> <p>This might not be an option right now, depending on how sleep deprived you are, but I’m finding that it’s worth it to go to bed earlier and wake up an hour before my kids. Even if I do absolutely nothing but lay in bed on my phone, I still feel better than if I had went from sleep to full mom mode immediately. I try to use that time to plan out my day, take a shower, read a book or go for a morning walk. If that isn’t possible right now, just keep in mind that it will be, say, six months from now. Things ARE going to get easier. Don’t lose sight of that! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-smarter-not-harder#post-2897505 Sun, 22 Sep 2019 10:08:49 +0000 cyoung 2897505@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How do you ladies stay on top of things? I feel like I’m drowning haha </p> <p>I feel like I’m always running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off. I have 3 under 3 and between trying to tend their needs and also deal with my mental health issues (I’m bipolar and have a eating disorder :( ) daily I feel like a mess. I love my life and I’m happy but some days I’m ready to jump in the car and drive to the beach. I know I should give myself some grace but I feel always behind and like I’m constantly struggling. My son has a speech delay and is possibly autistic. So I’m scheduling appointments and therapy sessions for him a lot. My oldest daughter is going though her “terrible twos.” She honestly just wants more attention so I’m trying to give her some extra. And my newborn is just being a newborn and I feel spread thin. My husband helps a lot so I have him to lean on. He is amazing. I know I should go be myself a break but I really need some tips on how to be work smarter not harder. 3 kids is hard!!!!! Especially so young. </p>