https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 04 May 2026 03:07:04 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1788302 Tue, 29 Jul 2014 23:50:09 +0000 808love 1788302@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@kml636: it is that lack of impulse control. Sounds like your LO is a huge dog lover as well.<br /> @Cole: yes, great idea- will look for clues that she wants to go in.<br /> @mrs.lion: yes, I won't hesitate to be firm when necessary</p> <p>Thanks, Bees! I appreciate you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783626 Sun, 27 Jul 2014 12:46:31 +0000 Cole 1783626@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@808love: I keep wondering what we are going to do about giving our dog a safe spot that a toddler can't get to too. The only thing I can think of right now is our bed or the guest bed (I swear I wash all the linens before anyone comes over!) I don't think the penned in area is a bad idea though for times when toddlers are in overdrive. Make it a positive for the dog and maybe it will even "ask" to go in. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783608 Sun, 27 Jul 2014 12:24:54 +0000 Mrs. Lion 1783608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@808love: i think in this situation if you want the behavior to end quicker you need to tie it to a very stern no and removal from the situation every time. Simply saying gentle touches with a 3 year old is probably not going to work. She is old enough to understand consequences, and i really do think if you set some very clear boundaries about what is ok and what is not (petting gently is ok, poking or pulling are not, for example) she will learn very quickly. But you have to be firm, just like you would be if she was about to run into the street. Being rough with a dog is potentially just as dangerous. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783601 Sun, 27 Jul 2014 12:18:33 +0000 Applesandbananas 1783601@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: lol love it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783595 Sun, 27 Jul 2014 12:12:54 +0000 kml636 1783595@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>your daughter is so cute! My LO is 20 months and absolutely uses our dog as her #1 play toy... Our dog lets her pull her ears, poke her, step on her... obviously I am not thrilled and I keep telling her "gentle" and put her in the corner if she does it, but she just doesn't seem to get it yet. It really makes me nervous for her to be around other dogs as they may not be as understanding, so I'm really trying to eliminate this behavior! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783585 Sun, 27 Jul 2014 12:07:21 +0000 808love 1783585@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: lol @ your dog-baby dialogue!</p> <p>Ok so I'm not the only one with the constant reminders about gentle touches. I didn't expect to have to monitor her and model so much but I just have to keep doing it. I'm very grateful our dog is mellow so far.<br /> @Cole: She has a little fenced off area in the house with her bed for sleeping but she needs us to allow her into the area-not like she can escape there on a moment's notice. I'm going to get another sized Kong. I got a big one but she hardly played with it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783444 Sun, 27 Jul 2014 09:08:30 +0000 Foodnerd81 1783444@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: I feel like my dog is trying to prove a point by not moving. Like he is saying, "looks, kid. I've been here for 11 years, you just got here a year ago. This is MY rug." And her response is, "Haha, look, I can pull your fur out with my fist and eat it!" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783401 Sun, 27 Jul 2014 08:04:56 +0000 ShootingStar 1783401@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: Ha, I have no sympathy for my dog getting upset with the baby poking her because she always puts herself right in the middle of the action. She knows how to leave if she wants to. Luckily the dog is super patient and sweet with him and he's only 8 months, so "gentle touches" are a work in progress. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783314 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 22:34:12 +0000 Foodnerd81 1783314@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@AnneBird: totally agree with all you said. </p> <p>@808love: my 1 year old loves the dog, and he tolerates her. I get so sick and tired of "be gentle", stop pulling the dog, gentle! GENTLE!!! all day long. And the dog gets annoyed but stays right in the middle of the rug she is playing on even though he has a bed that she is not allowed in. It's a work in progress. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783127 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 16:57:57 +0000 Cole 1783127@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think you got some great suggestions from others. One idea I heard recently was an extension of the safe place idea. The trainer was suggesting that you give the dog breaks through the day in their safe spot and make them special for the dog- give it a Kong or fun toy and put them in their spot. You can do this at times when your lo is likely to be especially into the dog and it also helps train the dog to know their safe spot is a good place to be as opposed to them being segregated. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783018 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 14:10:20 +0000 Applesandbananas 1783018@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My 16m gets over zealous with our dog and smacks our fog, I pull him back and model " nice hands" and if he continues, I redirect him/help the dog escape. </p> <p>Our dog is super laid back too but I don't want LO to think it's okay to hit him/pull his tail, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1783006 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 13:58:41 +0000 gingerbebe 1783006@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Model specific behavior. If your kid is not playing nice separate them but in eyesight stroke and love on the dog gently while narrating so she can see how happy and calm the dog is when touched lightly. Tell her she can play with the doggy again she she can be nice but she can't harass the dog or it will get mad. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782969 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 13:14:43 +0000 808love 1782969@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsh: I really like that it is a privilege mindset. And yes a little more time and consistency is what I need to do instead of knee jerk scolding, out of uncertainty and nervousness.<br /> @brownie: I think she does want a specific responsibility. That will help too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782966 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 13:14:20 +0000 Tanjowen 1782966@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with @Brownier - crates are a lifesaver! It's our dogs safe space, and we covered the top with a blanket. She retreats there if overwhelmed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782963 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 13:05:54 +0000 brownie 1782963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Give her some responsibility for the dog. My son has been feeding the dogs since he was 16 months old. It gives them some respect for him.</p> <p>Have supervised times for them to interact but do it after getting the energy out of both of them (walks). Then if she gets rough, separate them immediately. You say this works. Tell her the dog needs a time out until she can treat him nicely . Then model and show. </p> <p>Give the dog a safe space he can go that she cannot. Both of our dogs are crate trained and he isn't allowed in the crates. That way they can escape if he gets to be too much. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782911 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 11:19:35 +0000 808love 1782911@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@AnneBird: thanks for sharing that warning and your story. I was hoping our dog would go under the table inside but she hasn't figured that out. She has a spot outside. She found it after my daughter poked her all over, 'testing for germs'. Poor dog. I closely supervised after that incident the second day.<br /> @MrsH: Thank you so much for your support! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782906 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 11:11:31 +0000 MrsH 1782906@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@808love: I would just keep teaching your LO how to act with the dog, one week probably isn't enough time for it to sink in. It may help if you separate the two each time your LO doesn't play nice. That will also help teach her that owning an animal is a privilege not a right.</p> <p>Even if your new dog is the calmest dog ever it is still a new environment for your dog and your dog is still getting settled. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782902 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 11:04:41 +0000 AnneBird 1782902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't let these thing "go" just because your dog is so calm and patient. My first thought is that you just never know when a dog is going to have enough... And, even if your sweet dog never does anything, letting these behaviors go may be un-intentionally teaching your daughter that all dogs will accept such interactions which could spell trouble later on.</p> <p>My dog (50 pounds) will let toddlers pull on his tail and poke his eyes (yeah, i know), but I still speak up and tell all kids who interact with him that its not OK to be rough and that we use "gentle hands". I grew up with rotties and we never had issues, but looking back I realize that our parents were very strict about the kinds of interactions they would allow us to have with all dogs (big or small), and the interactions you mentioned were firmly in the forbidden list....</p> <p>One last note, I would encourage you to find a place for the dog to go to when she is a bit stressed out that your daughter can't get to... maybe another room? or a tall bed? Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782899 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 11:03:31 +0000 808love 1782899@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: yes she is super excited and that is her way of playing. Ok I will follow through on her timeouts like you advised. I am pretty confident it will work if I am consistent like you mentioned. It has just been a long time since I have had to discipline this way with her. My firm discipline skills are rusty and it was such an unexpected issue. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782894 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 10:59:58 +0000 808love 1782894@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: I did try the instructional approach and praise at first. Many times. I got too weary of her not listening I turned to scolding. But you are right--maybe I have to be more patient with her learning the dog. Separation is the only thing that has gotten LO to stop. But she is nearly to tears because she loves her new dog soooooo much. To pieces! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782892 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 10:58:10 +0000 Mrs. Lion 1782892@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>3 is plenty old enough to understand appropriate vs inappropriate behavior. I would model what kind of interaction with the dog is okay, and be extremely firm about interactions that are not. Its a safety issue, just like with running into the street or touching a hot stove. I would also give clear consequences for breaking the rules....for example, "if you touch the dog like that you will have to go play in another room and not see the dog". But once you set the limit you really have to enforce it every single time. Otherwise it will be confusing for her.At 3 she should be able to understand and will catch on pretty quickly. It sounds like she is just excited and doesn't know how to play appropriately with the dog yet, not that she is being intentionally disobedient. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782891 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 10:56:16 +0000 MrsH 1782891@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Instead of scolding I think teaching your LO to interact nicely with the dog will go a long way. Nice pets, this is how we touch the dog, this is how we play with the dog, this is how we show the dog love, etc. For the sake of the dog can you segregate them to different parts of the house when LO is being particularly "interactive?"</p> <p>ETA: sweet picture </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-a-3-year-old-not-to-harass-the-dog#post-1782890 Sat, 26 Jul 2014 10:52:00 +0000 808love 1782890@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Looking for ideas...we adopted our relatively calm Australian Cattle mix last weekend. LO is beyond thrilled but I am constantly scolding her about not pinching the dog's snout shut or hugging her super tightly around the neck. The scolding is making it unpleasant for everyone. My husband lets LO go and occasionally scolds the dog for mouthing LO. So I started scolding him-haha DH. That's not working either. I guess I am just worried about protecting LO from unexpected bites. I also want to protect the dog from being irritated but I think I am more irritated than the dog! Do I just let it go as the dog is pretty calm? I see her trying to get away from LO at times and I feel badly for the dog. I love LO and enjoy her passion for dogs...but I don't want her to behave like Darla from Finding Nemo. </p> <p>Help- never owned a dog (and/or a 3 year old) before!</p> <p>[attach=1524/14/n9bthk.498x600.image.jpg] </p> [attach=1524/14/n9btlm.600x400.image.jpg]