https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 14 Apr 2026 23:29:54 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-sibling-kindess#post-609563 Sun, 03 Mar 2013 16:17:15 +0000 MrsH 609563@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Superhero: have you tried the "hands are for helping not hitting" type stuff? I think there is a hands are not for hitting book for kids.</p> <p><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Hands-Are-Hitting-Best-Behavior/dp/1575423081" rel="nofollow">http://www.amazon.com/Hands-Are-Hitting-Best-Behavior/dp/1575423081</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-sibling-kindess#post-609395 Sun, 03 Mar 2013 13:53:45 +0000 BoogieBea 609395@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Superhero: completely agree. It's important to teach them why they shouldn't do something versus just having them obeying. We've also been helping him identify all the different emotions he may be feeling. That's been really helpful as well. His teacher made these simple faces of emotions on a stick - kind of like emoticons on popsicle sticks. And whenever the kids are having a moment, she has them pick out how they're feeling. He's at a point now where he can tell us whether he's feeling happy, sad, angry, etc. So, I make him tell me how he's feeling whenever he acts up with his sister. So when he tells me he's angry and doesn't like her. I tell her that it's okay not to like her at the moment and he should just keep his distance from her. Usually, in 10 minutes, he'll calm down and come back to tell me he's happy and likes his sister again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-sibling-kindess#post-609235 Sun, 03 Mar 2013 11:30:38 +0000 Mrs. Superhero 609235@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BoogieBea: we try to "gossip" about her good behavior, but that's a great reminder!</p> <p>After some thought I think we will try some role playing and try to find some picture books on the subject. I really want her to understand that it's wrong, not just that she gets punished. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-sibling-kindess#post-608876 Sun, 03 Mar 2013 00:59:30 +0000 BoogieBea 608876@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We've been battling the same behavior as well. We're actually working with his teacher on his behavior. He's been acting up at school (not with his main teacher - but with his art and PE teacher) lately as well.<br /> Lately, He's been really responding to being praised for good behavior. When I pick him up, his teacher will tell me how well (or not well) behaved he was that day. He loves it when he hears her tell me that he was well behaved. And now, we reverse it at home and say that we'll tell his teacher that he's well behaved because he ate his dinner well or what not. He's eating it all up and is really tryin to demonstrate his good side - at times.<br /> Also, it turns out that his sister is not a pushover. She'll shove him back or find opportunities later on to return a jab. And he's much more bothered by it than she is when he shoves her. So that's when we explain how he makes her feel the same way when he is not kind to her.<br /> 3 has been the most troubling age by far! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-sibling-kindess#post-608867 Sun, 03 Mar 2013 00:36:00 +0000 Mrs. Superhero 608867@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: Interesting, we haven't really discussed the concept of promises...not sure how to start? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-sibling-kindess#post-608866 Sun, 03 Mar 2013 00:35:24 +0000 HLK208 608866@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are sort of having this problem right now. DS plays too rough with his 9 month old sister sometimes. I have to tell him that we need to teach her how to be gentle so if we play gently, she will learn. I wish I could give you more advice. Three really is SO difficult! We do have a reward chart with things he should do (play nicely with sister, clean up toys, behave in church, etc) and he gets an X if he doesn't do one of his tasks. So, three X's means he loses something or other. Typically a toy or something related to what caused the problem. When I draw that X, I can tell that it bothers him. I *think* he is catching on because he just started telling his sister how to be gentle or he will tell her when she isn't being very nice haha. It helps that he has a role, to be her teacher. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-sibling-kindess#post-608849 Sun, 03 Mar 2013 00:22:30 +0000 mrbee 608849@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do you ever ask Ria to promise you she won't do something? Been doing this with Charlie and it's been the most effective behavior management we've come across for our 3 year old!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-to-teach-sibling-kindess#post-608804 Sat, 02 Mar 2013 23:43:41 +0000 Mrs. Superhero 608804@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Or more specifically, how do I teach my (barely) 3 y/o to stop shoving her sister over. I know Ria is little to understand empathy, but she can't keep it up! We are working on getting her to tell us if Sunny is bugging her, and to use her words instead of hiting but she is still getting time outs all the time for it and I'm getting exhausted.</p> <p>Three is a hard age. She didn't used to yell "no!" at me either. I want her to learn self discipline and respect, and I'm not ready to give up and spank her (worked on me?) but I am getting frustrated.</p> <p>I keep reading that you should use natural consequences, but as far as I can see, the natural consequence is that Sunny gets hurt and apparently that's not much of a deterrent.</p> <p>(and sorry, hostesses, I forgot to choose a category!) </p>