https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 08 Apr 2026 02:14:05 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not/page/2#post-2190341 Wed, 27 May 2015 08:48:46 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2190341@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks guys. It's actually really encouraging to hear other people getting mad about this. It's very frustrating, and while I know some of it has to do with federal regulations, there are also a lot of factors that the clinic isn't willing to consider in individual cases. Mostly I just wish they'd told me up front that they wouldn't be able to help me. I was honest when I made the appointment, and honest during the appointment with the doctor, and in both conversations it sounded like they'd be able to help no big deal. So $282 that could've paid for an IUI with a midwife is down the drain. Incredibly frustrating. I'm not even sure they're willing to do the tests now, as they said it might be next week before they call me back about that. Next cycle starts next week. We've had such great experiences since moving here, everyone has been so incredibly welcoming and wonderful to us, even though we are basically in a pretty conservative, rural area. Luckily experiences like this are the exception and not the rule. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not/page/2#post-2189974 Tue, 26 May 2015 20:05:01 +0000 ms.line 2189974@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: Such homophobic bullshit!! So glad you found midwives willing to do your IUI. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not/page/2#post-2189955 Tue, 26 May 2015 19:42:10 +0000 QBbride 2189955@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: that is so ridiculous! I'm so mad for you. Like what if you had walked in and pretended you guys were together? So basically you're being punished for being honest about the situation. Sorry you are dealing with this :sad: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not/page/2#post-2189929 Tue, 26 May 2015 19:18:07 +0000 mrscobee 2189929@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: That is so ridiculous! I am unsure about how they can be getting away with this! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not/page/2#post-2189916 Tue, 26 May 2015 19:04:44 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2189916@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I tried, but I had already used the word "donor," so they weren't convinced. I even asked if they required that straight couples to be married (because it seemed that they wouldn't take MY word for it, but that they take everyone else's word for it). No, of course not. They don't have to be married. They just have to say they're together. Very frustrating, and exactly why California passed the law that allows recipients to waive the testing and quarantine if they've used the donor before at home. Because that use of the donor at home basically qualifies as a sexual relationship. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not/page/2#post-2189908 Tue, 26 May 2015 18:55:11 +0000 mrscobee 2189908@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: Ugh!! So frustrating! Did you try to tell them you were in a sexual relationship? If you did, I don't get how they can deny services because they are basically taking everyone's word for it! I hope you can recover your costs and the IUI works out elsewhere. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2189904 Tue, 26 May 2015 18:44:36 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2189904@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Update:<br /> I talked to the fertility clinic today. They said no. After charging $282 out of pocket (they didn't even offer to bill insurance) and giving me the impression that they would be able to help us, they called today to tell me there is no way to waive the testing and quarantine requirements, and that they couldn't help me. It sounded pretty final. So, I asked if I could at least still get the testing done, the bloodwork and HSG that was planned, even if they won't do the insemination. The MA said she'd have to ask the doctor. She wasn't sure. I made sure to use the words "deny services" when I asked. Hard to imagine that they'll refuse to do testing. If they do, I'm finding a lawyer and demanding my $282 back, because that's absurd. </p> <p>Anyway, I've found a couple midwives in Berkeley who will do IUIs for less than the clinic in Medford would've charged. The clinic already called in my clomid script, and I've picked up the first month's worth. I have 3 refills, so that will at least get me through the first few tries, even if they refuse to work with us at all. I'm hoping they'll let me do the bloodwork and HSG, and then I can time it right with our donor to go to Berkeley for the insemination next month. If not, we might start looking for a donor in the Berkeley area who would be willing to donate for IUIs. </p> <p>Ugh, more hoops, more complications. This is a frustrating process... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188198 Sun, 24 May 2015 16:00:04 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2188198@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ms.line: Oh I didn't see that post in my last reply. Thank you!! I was having trouble sorting through all of the legal sites, not knowing which ones would really be relevant to this situation. I'm going to get in touch with the one in CA to see if they will help me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188195 Sun, 24 May 2015 15:58:56 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2188195@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ms.line: Yes. That makes sense. I will call them on Tuesday to see what I can do. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188185 Sun, 24 May 2015 15:27:48 +0000 ms.line 2188185@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Here's a listing of reproductive law attorneys in Oregon: <a href="http://attorneys.lawinfo.com/reproductive-rights/oregon/" rel="nofollow">http://attorneys.lawinfo.com/reproductive-rights/oregon/</a> </p> <p>This place is based in CA, but specifically mention that they work on donor sperm issues: <a href="http://www.iflg.net/what-we-do/sperm-donation-law/" rel="nofollow">http://www.iflg.net/what-we-do/sperm-donation-law/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188177 Sun, 24 May 2015 15:07:51 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2188177@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Amorini: Any ideas how I might go about finding an attorney who has knowledge in this area? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188175 Sun, 24 May 2015 15:07:27 +0000 ms.line 2188175@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think you should call them back and say exactly that! You colloquially used the term "donor" because he's not your life partner - however, your relationship with him meets their standard of a "ongoing sexual relationship." If they still give you friction, I'd get a lawyer on that strongly-worded letter. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188172 Sun, 24 May 2015 15:03:00 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2188172@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe if I find a lawyer to write a strongly worded letter, they might back off and just accept our situation as a sexual relationship. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188171 Sun, 24 May 2015 15:02:25 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2188171@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Amorini: Yeah, I've been thinking of calling an attorney. I'll spend today and tomorrow researching who might be best to call. I'm sure there are a few in the SF Bay Area who might be able to help.<br /> @bluestriped bee: Thanks. I know it could work with frozen sperm, unfortunately it's not just the freezing that they need to do, but a ton of STD testing and a 6 month quarantine, all of which costs a fortune and takes 6 months!<br /> @ms.line: They mentioned having us sign a waiver, but they've never done this before so they don't have a waiver for us to sign! They're not refusing us service, but time is of the essence and I'm getting the impression they're not motivated to make this happen next cycle. If our donor wasn't moving at the end of June I wouldn't be so stressed, but I was really hoping to have one good go at it in June before he moves.<br /> I totally agree about Andrew's take on the situation in that thread. I read that as well. I wish I'd looked into it further before I went for my first appointment, and hadn't said the word donor. Unfortunately now they know he's a donor. Maybe I can call them back and just say we have an ongoing, committed sexual relationship, so they need to just let us do the IUI. We're both committed to making this baby happen, and like Andrew said, his sperm has been finding it's way into me for months now, so I think that should count as sexual!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188150 Sun, 24 May 2015 14:21:51 +0000 Torchwood 2188150@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ms.line: I was wondering if it would be possible to do that. I mean, not all couples actually have sex to conceive, and they aren't going to be turned away over it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188104 Sun, 24 May 2015 11:54:29 +0000 ms.line 2188104@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: WTF, that is such bullshit. The clinic isn't offering you a waiver to sign? I thought "Andrew's" take on the language of "sexually intimate relationship" on this thread was interesting: <a href="https://knowndonorregistry.com/discuss/any-experience-with-getting-the-6-month-sperm-hold-waived" rel="nofollow">https://knowndonorregistry.com/discuss/any-experience-with-getting-the-6-month-sperm-hold-waived</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2188010 Sun, 24 May 2015 08:08:52 +0000 BSB 2188010@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: oh, wow. I'm in WA state. Have you called around to other RE clinics?</p> <p>About frozen sperm, my DH and I have used his frozen sperm a bunch of times for both our IUIs and IVF. My RE does prefer fresh samples but for us havng sperm frozen was a good backup if he couldn't provide one on the day of the IUI or IVF. While you do lose viability when you freeze, it's still possible to get pregnant using frozen sperm.</p> <p>I'm sorry about all the legal issues you are facing with using your sperm. Maybe other clinics might have different requirements. </p> <p>Oh, everytime my DH dropped off a sample to freeze, the lab did test his sperm to check for motility and sperm count. Maybe that's all they need. Everytime my DH dropped off a sample to freeze, it would cost us $400 to cryopreserve his sample. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2187989 Sun, 24 May 2015 07:00:11 +0000 Amorini 2187989@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: I'm so sorry. I really am. This is so unfair. Not that you need another hoop to jump through, but I might think about engaging an attorney to "strongly encourage" the clinic see straight and draw up papers. I know it might sound like a long shot, but I would ask for some pro bono help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2187931 Sun, 24 May 2015 00:17:42 +0000 Torchwood 2187931@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: Ooh, now I'm all mad. This freaking country sometimes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2187930 Sun, 24 May 2015 00:15:38 +0000 Torchwood 2187930@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: Ugh! That's so frustrating, and absurd! I hope you can work it out somehow. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2187887 Sat, 23 May 2015 21:46:12 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2187887@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well, it turns out I may not get to follow the original plan for next month. Last I talked to the office, which was on Thursday morning, they were sounding awfully unsure about letting me use our sperm donor for the IUI. When I was in the appointment, the doctor really just said she needed to come up with some paperwork for us to sign and that it would be fine. I talked to her MA on Thursday to let her know I wanted to do the HSG, and she basically said she wasn't even sure we could do the IUI because we don't have any paperwork signed. I told her I'd be happy to sign anything, but they don't even know WHAT paperwork I should sign. I've looked into it, and depending on who you talk to, this is a BIG legal issue. I guess you can only do an IUI with fresh sperm if you're in a "sexually intimate relationship". So...even though I've been taking all of the risks of a sexually intimate relationship for the last 8 months, the government says it doesn't count and I would still have to test, freeze, quarantine, and retest the sperm in 6 MONTHS before doing an IUI. To the tune of $2500-$4500. Are you kidding? I'd be better off buying sperm! Plus, frozen sperm isn't as viable and has a much shorter life span. This is so frustrating. I wish I knew how to fix this but I can't figure it out. And I don't get the impression the clinic will help in any sort of timely manner. Now, in CA, apparently there is a law that allows women who have inseminated at home using the same sperm to waive the testing and quarantine requirements. However, I live far closer to the closest clinic in Oregon (still an hour and a half) than I do to a clinic in CA who will do this (3.5 hours) and the donor himself lives in Oregon. Oh so frustrating. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2184434 Wed, 20 May 2015 12:05:01 +0000 LoveHope 2184434@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lauren0817: did you end up having any blockages? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2184313 Wed, 20 May 2015 10:32:58 +0000 lauren0817 2184313@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms - It sounds like you have already decided to go ahead with the HSG, but I just wanted to add one more HSG success story. After TTC naturally for 13 months, we saw a reproductive endocrinologist who recommended a HSG as part of our initial testing. I ended up getting pregnant naturally the month that I had the HSG (I think I need to have the HSG before day 10 of my cycle, so I definitely got pregnant afterwards). Unfortunately I miscarried at 10 weeks (there was a genetic issue, so nothing to do with the HSG). I know HSG can clear minor blockages and something about the dye that they use is thought to enhance fertility. Even if you don't end up getting pregnant right after your HSG, you will know whether your tubes are open which could have a huge impact on choice of treatment. Hope everything goes well :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2183872 Tue, 19 May 2015 20:47:34 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2183872@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ms.line: Thanks! If this month doesn't work, I'll be joining your POAS 6+ months thread for June! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2182991 Tue, 19 May 2015 10:55:04 +0000 LoveHope 2182991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: good luck :goodluck: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2182927 Tue, 19 May 2015 10:28:24 +0000 ms.line 2182927@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: Ugh, what a bummer! Fx that your IUI does the trick! :goodluck: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2182910 Tue, 19 May 2015 10:23:53 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2182910@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well, I think we've decided to go ahead and do the HSG. I haven't called the insurance company yet, but will do so today. I got an email from our donor saying that he is moving out of the area in June, luckily though he timed it so he would be here for our first IUI next month. Big bummer, although I had a feeling it was a possibility at some point. Here's to hoping that this cycle or next cycle works for us, as finding a new donor is a huge, complicated, awkward and generally awful task. So we decided that given that information, we will go ahead and pull out all the stops for next cycle. Fingers crossed! I'm 2-3 dpo now, so maybe this cycle will just work! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2181482 Mon, 18 May 2015 08:42:59 +0000 LoveHope 2181482@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: im getting an HSG done tomorrow. My insurance covers partial but we're responsible for the rest. At this point im willing to do what it takes. I can't take this not knowing anymore. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2181291 Mon, 18 May 2015 04:29:13 +0000 dc yoga bee 2181291@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: definitely check with insurance! Mine doesn't cover any fertility treatments as @travellingbee: mentioned, but HSG was considered diagnostic testing, which was covered. I literally got pregnant 72 hours after mine. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/hsg-or-not#post-2181274 Mon, 18 May 2015 01:34:07 +0000 jaguar 2181274@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@2farmmoms: I am definitely on the PLUS for HSG's. I chuck it in the 'could help, can't hurt' basket - and you might get lucky after. If nothing else, you'll know that any failed cycles after this are NOT because of tubes. x </p>