https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 29 Apr 2026 05:23:16 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2619155 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 22:03:41 +0000 808love 2619155@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO went through that phase. Just be patient. If anything....here's a suggestion...bit by bit, you could try reminding LO of specific things she couldn't do before and now can do. (Then let go of the conversation without any expectation. The underlying message here is CONFIDENCE.) The next time she says I can't, tell her a story of something you couldn't do and now you can. (Then drop it. The underlying message is I UNDERSTAND. YOU ARE NOT ALONE WITH THIS STRUGGLE.) The next time it happens, tell her how you wish you could turn her can't into a big giant CAN OF MARSHMALLOWS or CAN OF LAUGHTER or CAN OF WHATEVER SHE LIKES (Just make it silly, then drop it. The underlying message here is IT IS FUN, YOU SUPPORT HER AND DISSIPATES ANXIETY/FEAR OF DISAPPOINTMENT FROM YOU) Oh also, in a completely non-situation remind her that she CAN if she has the courage to give it a try.<br /> ....Before you know it, LO will come along. :) She probably just needs some space to grow and creative ways to support her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2618530 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 06:01:55 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2618530@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sunny: this is the situation we are in. Ugh! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2618515 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 03:02:54 +0000 lamariniere 2618515@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What I do when this happens (and if it's something I know my kid knows how to do or could do), I guide him step by step orally without actually touching/helping him do it. For example, there's a (short) fireman pole at the playground and he really wants to do it, but he's not very brave. He will do it if I help him, but he's scared to do it alone. So I've stood there watching and told him "put your hand here", "put your leg here" and he does it and then feels so confident after and starts doing it on his own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2618231 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 17:49:37 +0000 MrsSRS 2618231@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We say a cheerful, "nope, we aren't saying I can't right now. Say I can try!" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2618195 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 17:19:53 +0000 Mrsbells 2618195@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Bao: My started saying I cant around 3 years of age. And i basically tell her not to say that. I've told her she can do anything if she puts her mind to it. I always remind her to give her best try and maybe say "I think need some help with this" rather than "I cant" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2618186 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 17:05:55 +0000 sunny 2618186@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO has been telling me "I can't! I need help!" for EVERYTHING. Even things I know she can do herself (potty, wash hands, put on socks &amp; shoes). It's been driving me batty! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2618003 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 13:39:16 +0000 Bao 2618003@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@avivoca: that's so interesting! I may try that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2618000 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 13:37:10 +0000 avivoca 2618000@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Bao: H has been listening to the Frozen soundtrack a lot lately and has really started telling everyone that she can't do something. I'm going to stop playing it for awhile to see if it makes a difference. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2617987 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 13:30:17 +0000 Bao 2617987@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MUI831: that's a good idea, I'll start using that phrase and see how it goes! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2617986 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 13:29:53 +0000 Bao 2617986@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: @yin: I think we have the same kids haha! I hate to say it but I find comfort in knowing I'm not alone. @ShootingStar: she does, hmm... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2617984 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 13:26:57 +0000 Mommy Finger 2617984@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I usually say "show me how you try" and that gets him to at least attempt it. Usually he completes the task and gets lots of praise. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2617824 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 11:27:51 +0000 yin 2617824@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hear this all the time. LO was also driving a Jeep over the weekend, and he kept saying "I can't" on repeat. Ugh. He immediately says that he can't because he is afraid of failure. All I want for him to do is try his best. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2617797 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 11:05:14 +0000 ShootingStar 2617797@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Any chance she's been watching Frozen a lot? I swear my son learned "I can't" from Elsa. He was saying it a ton but not as much since he got out of the Frozen phase. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2617749 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 09:56:19 +0000 looch 2617749@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yep....how funny is it that with everyone of your posts, I am like that's my son too!</p> <p>My son either gets things on the first try, or he says he can not do it and won't try again. I don't have any suggestions on what to do, other than just to show him that everyone makes mistakes and doesn't get it on the first try every time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-cant#post-2617595 Thu, 08 Sep 2016 07:43:14 +0000 Bao 2617595@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO has been saying "I can't" a lot lately, she gets so anxious about things and is not willing to try a lot of new stuff. For example the other day she was sitting in her power wheels jeep and since it's new to her she didn't want to try and drive it. She sat there and just said she can't, even though I was 3 feet away encouraging her to just try one time, driving towards me. This goes for a lot of things she does, her default answer is "I can't". I know she is only 4 but is there a way to encourage her to think more positive? We constantly tell her she can, and she will be ok and we are right there with her etc etc. </p> <p>Anyone been through this? </p>