https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 05 Nov 2026 23:45:33 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-811355 Mon, 27 May 2013 15:31:38 +0000 lomom 811355@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Twine: I hope the LC can provide some kind of guidance. When I talked to her to set up the appt, she said she had a 36 weeker and went through a lot of what I'm going through. So hopefully just meeting with her will be helpful. I don't have any non-HB support right now.</p> <p>@runsyellowlites: I don't even know if he'd nurse at this point. I haven't had much luck getting him to latch nor have I had anyone to help me work with him. I don't even know of he'd latch at this point. I hope he does, but he's been on bottles for quite awhile with little exposure to nursing. I'm going to the mommy baby class at the hospital tomorrow, the LC I have the appt with on Wednesday will be at that class so I might have a chance to talk to her then.</p> <p> @googly-eyes: I really want to switch. I'm hoping the LC has some recommendations for breastfeeding supportive peds and I can broach the subject with DH. It's probably a good idea to switch anyway, since his ped only works Mon-Thurs and once mat leave is over, I'll be off every Friday and really should schedule his appts then. DH would be more willing to switch on those grounds.</p> <p>@meganmp: if his ped would look at adjusted age, LO is in the 50th percentile. He's gaining extremely well and is very happy and healthy. But I really feel like he isn't seeing the big picture. :(</p> <p>@zippylef: thank you for your support, I really appreciate it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-811224 Mon, 27 May 2013 13:29:25 +0000 loveisstrange 811224@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: Honestly the comments about him still being a doctor were more for the other bees who were just saying "eff him". </p> <p>I know how hard it is. I went through all the same things. I didn't buy bottles either. I refused to quit even though it was killing me. I totally, totally understand. It's an extremely tough place to be. Do what you need to do. I really hope this LC can help you, whether that be helping you to latch or helping you gain some closure about quitting.</p> <p>But yeah, seriously... your ped does kind of sound like an ass. I'd maybe start shopping around for a new one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-811198 Mon, 27 May 2013 13:05:14 +0000 meganmp 811198@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I say F the ped, too. Our ped had concerns about an eating issue, too, but we did what WE, as the parents, thought was best and DD has gone from the 0 percentile to 35th. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-811190 Mon, 27 May 2013 12:52:54 +0000 googly-eyes 811190@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: You know, regardless of all this feeding stuff, if you don't like your child's pediatrician, you're probably better off switching. I feel like that's a doctor you need to trust. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-811102 Mon, 27 May 2013 11:36:03 +0000 Smurfette 811102@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: honestly I feel more bonding time just snuggling with her. I just have felt bonded from the beginning. I mean she came from me and we made her, so it is just natural to me. Maybe BF helped her with bonding, not sure. She is with me all day, well for another week:(, so I think that helps her attachment to me.</p> <p>I know most bond with BF. I might not so much cause I am not loving BF. It is better then the beginning but I still don't love it. I won't be one to do it fod a year at all. I think if I do 6 months that will be great for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-811055 Mon, 27 May 2013 11:12:29 +0000 runsyellowlites 811055@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: I think considering all you've told us of your lo, his awesome growth (seriously it took over 2mths for P to gain 3lb), &amp; your peach of a pedi, I'd just try nurse in that kind of situation! I don't think some extra milk received through comfort nursing is going to hurt anything! It's not like bc he didn't get that 10cc through a bottle he's going to start losing weight, although your pedis awful counsel sure made it seem that way. I also think that if I wasn't going to just nurse in that situation DH would be up making a bottle so he could get a little more understanding of the work &amp; stress of the route he's agreeing with the pedi on! Ugh!</p> <p>I'm really sorry you had a rough night! Is there anyway you could chat over the phone with this LC before your meeting, just for situations like this? Idk... You're definitely a better patient than I am bc I would've just tried to nurse! Lol ((hugs)) to you for your awesomeness! Hope today is easier than last night! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-811013 Mon, 27 May 2013 10:45:19 +0000 Mrs. Twine 811013@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Septemberlove; I'm sure he really means well in terms of wanting health and growth for your son, I just think he is presenting his advice in such a dire and forceful way that it makes me a little angry. Mostly angry that if you were not the type to ever buck authority you would probably just let yourself be bullied into doing it the way he is suggesting without investigating alternatives. I really believe that there are other ways to make sure your son is getting the nourishment he needs. I hope you find the LC to be really helpful! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-811008 Mon, 27 May 2013 10:39:41 +0000 lomom 811008@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Twine: the SNS is on my list of questions for the LC :) I really am not a fan of the ped either, I think he's just seeing the number on the scale rather than the big picture. I really don't think he cares one way or the other if LO has BM or the high calorie formula on its own. And he certainly doesn't have a clue as to how much work EPing is. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810991 Mon, 27 May 2013 10:25:19 +0000 Mrs. Blue 810991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: I just want to say that I completely understand everything you are going through. I was so frustrated and disappointed to give up on nursing. I felt like a failure and every bottle just made my feel guilty and irritated. At 11 weeks now, I pump and use formula, and I'm mostly okay with it finally. I still have times that I get down but there aren't tears amd massive guilt all the time anymore. I give them as much pumped milk as I can, an give them that. Then, I give a bottle with just a little more formula than what they typically finish because I'd rather waste that then breastmilk. Also, I get both bottles ready before I start to avoid te screaming banshee part. :)</p> <p>I really hope you are able to get nursing to work for both of you, but if it doesn't, know that this isn't the hill you die on. Do everything you can to meet your goal, but I promise you will definitely end up strongly bonded with a growing, happy, healthy little one no matter how you end up doing feedings. Also, your ped sounds like a jerk. I mean, we struggled with nursing and I had to supplement, but he was always supportive of me trying to BF as much as I could as long as I was willing to supplement if needed to make sure my peanuts were gaining weight. Good luck with the LC! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810979 Mon, 27 May 2013 10:18:08 +0000 googly-eyes 810979@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yup, bottles can be frustrating. I think all the things @zippylef said are pretty much what comments I'd make... Also re: the weighing, maybe he's just thinking along the lines of not being able to do that every feeding. Is his requirement long term or short til he hits a certain weight? I know maybe this sounds backward but is it possible to do the bottle (so he gets the min amt of fortified milk) and then bf til he's full? My LO wouldn't have gone for that but maybe yours will? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810975 Mon, 27 May 2013 10:16:19 +0000 Mrs. Twine 810975@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Okay, pardon my french, but your ped. sounds like a f***er. I really, really do not like him. It is not a "super scale," it is called a scale. And yes, it can measure intake fairly accurately. Have you considered doing the fortification through an SNS? Also, you can rent one of those "super-scales" from home health if you are really concerned and want to track for every feeding. Medela makes a great one. The LC could teach you how to do it, or you can just look up the scale and follow the tutorial they have (here is one example: <a href="http://breastfeedingmiracles.blogspot.com/2011/05/feeding-test-weights.html)" rel="nofollow">http://breastfeedingmiracles.blogspot.com/2011/05/feeding-test-weights.html)</a>. Then you could use a small amount of pumped milk in the SNS (or just the fortifier, if it is a liquid already) with the fortifier and just nurse. I understand the concern about weight gain, truly I do, but I think you have some options here and it is frustrating to me to see what I perceive to be ignorance (or misinformation, or whatever you want to call it) turning this into such a rough situation for you. Babywearing can be great for bonding, and you can also do skin to skin that way (similar to Kangaroo care). Being close to your body that way mimics what he was used to in utero (the sounds, the movement, your familiar smell) and has been found to help with weight gain and also to have positive impacts on self-regulation (heart rate, breathing...). You definitely don't have to do any particular feeding method to have wonderful bonding with your kids. I didn't feel any different bonding-wise with Ellie, who took a bottle at every feeding in addition to nursing, and Lorelei who never took a bottle. Bonding happens in so many different ways, and is really as unique as each parent-child pair. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810972 Mon, 27 May 2013 10:14:16 +0000 lomom 810972@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dagret: yeah :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810962 Mon, 27 May 2013 10:04:33 +0000 dagret 810962@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: oh yeah, I forgot about that part. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810921 Mon, 27 May 2013 09:34:09 +0000 lomom 810921@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Smurfette: what do you feel like helps with bonding?</p> <p>We do some skin to skin but when he naps on me, I feel so tremendously close to him. Just sitting with him and watching his chest rise and fall and watching him smile in his sleep and knowing how comforted he is by being close to me... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810916 Mon, 27 May 2013 09:31:25 +0000 lomom 810916@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dagret: we have to fortify it with a high calorie formula, so we have to follow the formula rules of once its heated up, it's eaten or thrown away within an hour. It really really sucks. If it were just BM, I'd absolutely reheat. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810909 Mon, 27 May 2013 09:26:35 +0000 lomom 810909@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@zippylef: I'm definitely going to talk to the LC about not having his ped on board. I know his concern is weight gain, I want him to gain weight too and would never jeopardize his health. But his ped acts like i'd starve him. I know breastfeeding isn't the only way to bond but it was always my hope to breastfeed so I'm really having a hard time giving that up. Maybe meeting with the LC will bring closure, if we're unable to get LO to latch. It's hard because I feel like the EPing is interfering with bonding but I just can't give it up yet. Not until I know for sure he won't latch. But even then, my goal was a year of BM and its going to be hard to walk away from that goal too. It's just been a huge struggle I never anticipated. :( I didn't even buy bottles before LO was born (or a pump). I was so sure I would nurse and do everything I could to make it happen. I even gave away all the formula samples we got in the mail because I didn't want it in the house. I put up with EVERYONE telling me I couldn't do it and now that's looking like the reality and it's so hard to give up that dream and come to terms with bottle feeding. I know he'll thrive regardless of whether he's drinking BM or formula. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810882 Mon, 27 May 2013 08:53:37 +0000 dagret 810882@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Im sorry, thats so frustrating. </p> <p>I reheat breast milk for the next feeding if its within, say, 4 hrs. We haven't had any problems. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810753 Mon, 27 May 2013 05:29:58 +0000 Smurfette 810753@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: bottles suck! It is a battle to get R to take one at night. Started using formula cause I would rather waster money then BM and the effort pumping.</p> <p>I know you are super frustrated and I would be too if I were you. I will say though I don't feel the bonding with R and breast feeding. Sometimes it is nice that I am the one that can comfort her but other times it is hard cause everything is on me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810742 Mon, 27 May 2013 05:03:01 +0000 loveisstrange 810742@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: I mean, I think his concerns are somewhat legitimate. I definitely think you should see this LC and then maybe get her to contact your ped and maybe work something out? He doesnt sound overly informed on breastfeeding but he IS still a doctor and he still has your LO's best interests at heart. Don't completely disregard him.</p> <p>Second, bonding happens no matter what. C was on the bottle from day 1 and we are still very closely bonded. We didn't have to try, it just happened. BF is NOT the only way to bond with your baby. I also wanted to add that bonding was what made me quit trying to BF/pump. It was stressing me out and interfering with my bond with her. Best advice my LC ever gave me.</p> <p>As a bottle-feeding mom, dealing with growth spurts is rough. As much as it sucks, its best to overfill the bottles a little and let a bit go to waste. Unfortunately, it's just the nature of the beast. From my own experiences and from what everyone told me, a little waste is good because thats how you know that they need to increase their intake. When they drain a couple bottles in a row, increase the amount in the next bottle by .5oz, and so on and so forth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810738 Mon, 27 May 2013 04:51:19 +0000 lomom 810738@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@zippylef: his reasoning is that we can't fortify the breastmilk if LO is nursing and we can't measure intake. He didn't believe me when I said the LC had a scale and would measure LO before and after a feed to estimate, to the half ounce, how much LO had consumed. He sarcastically remarked that it must be some kind of super scale. I get that we can't fortify it, but I'm willing to do a mixture of nursing and pumping and to monitor LO's weight very closely. Honestly, the ped straight up said there weren't any benefits to nursing vs. feeding him pumped milk. But the more I've read about the 6 week growth spurt, the more I believe that there are so many benefits to nursing instead of exclusively pumping. LO would be able, most importantly, to eat until he's satisfied rather than us try to guess and under or over feed him. And there's a difference (maybe I'm just completely stupid because I really didn't know this until I read about the growth spurt) in breast milk. There's hindmilk and foremilk and during a growth spurt, when baby nurses really frequently, not only are they regulating supply, but they're also consuming more hindmilk, which is higher in fat content. I know we're not ensuring he's getting the right balance of foremilk and hindmilk. And then there's the bonding aspect too, which he completely downplayed. I get that there are other ways to bond that are wonderful as well, but no matter how we do it, bonding is important! But bottom line, the ped just wants him to keep gaining and doesn't think breastfeeding will result in weight gain. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810735 Mon, 27 May 2013 04:38:39 +0000 loveisstrange 810735@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: :( Thats not cool. Well, hopefully the LC can help you.</p> <p>I know your LO had growth issues and such, so I hesitate just to say "Screw your ped and do whatever you want." What is his reasoning? If he has a legit reason for not wanting you to, maybe just disregarding him isn't the best thing for your LO, despite what you may want to do.</p> <p>And seriously, I would have made DH get up and deal with it. For real. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810728 Mon, 27 May 2013 04:23:24 +0000 Penny Lane 810728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>ah mama I'm sorry :( go kick your DH for snoring and throw some darts at your peds nose for telling you how to raise your child!! screw him and breastfeed your child if that's what you want to do! you're doing a great job :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810726 Mon, 27 May 2013 04:02:06 +0000 Kemma 810726@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry you're having a rough night, you're doing a fantastic job so hang in there!</p> <p>And go kick your DH for snoring :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810725 Mon, 27 May 2013 04:00:14 +0000 lomom 810725@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It usually doesn't bother me that much but I'd fed him 4oz, he'd zonked out so I laid him down to pump. I pumped for about 10 minutes while he screamed. DH is snoring, I tried to calm LO, give him his paci. Nothing worked, he just wanted more food. So I stopped pumping, got all unattached from everything and redressed and went to the kitchen to prep another bottle. I bring it back, LO eats like 5cc and zonked back out. </p> <p>All that effort and all that screaming for 5cc. I sit back down and get reattached snd he screams again. I offer him the bottle again, after getting unattached again. He drinks another 5cc and zonked back out. </p> <p>I know it's probably just this growth spurt stuff but its killing me. I'm trying so hard to keep up with him eating a billion ounces a day that wasting an ounce (plus all the BM I'm now covered in from stopping mid pump twice) really bugs me. </p> <p>As does DH snoring. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810723 Mon, 27 May 2013 03:55:15 +0000 Mrs Hedgehog 810723@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Uhm, eff him and breastfeed! Then find a new ped who is more in line with your way of thinking. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810721 Mon, 27 May 2013 03:44:55 +0000 lomom 810721@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@zippylef: unfortunately not until Wednesday. I was supposed to go Friday but DH made me reschedule because his friend wanted to come see LO. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810720 Mon, 27 May 2013 03:40:22 +0000 loveisstrange 810720@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Unforunately, the wasting formula/BM thing is par for the course. It always really bugged me too. :( Im sorry. </p> <p>Did you get to see that LC yet? I know you made an appointment. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810719 Mon, 27 May 2013 03:39:04 +0000 katsupgirl 810719@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry you're so frustrated. ::hugs:: Your ped is a jerk! I totally feel you about bottles. I'm never sure about the amount either. It sucks hardcore to waste that hard to come by breast milk. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-hate-bottles#post-810717 Mon, 27 May 2013 03:33:49 +0000 lomom 810717@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hate hate hate effing hate bottles. </p> <p>I never get the amount right, LO is either still screaming like a banshee afterwards or I wind up wasting an ounce of BM because I put too much in the bottle. </p> <p>It just sucks so effing much. I hate bottles and I hate his stupid fucking ped who thinks he shouldn't breastfeed. </p>