https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 19 Oct 2026 05:34:45 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1857424 Thu, 11 Sep 2014 04:18:13 +0000 candymum 1857424@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lizzywiz: I really feel your pain. And you know what I can say i was brought up the exact opposite way which is we were just fed all the time. Yes it was healthy home made food and we hardly got take away ever but my mother had and still has absolute no concept of portion control. So at the age of 30 when I'm over weight and have battled with my weight all my life up and down do I blame her for it ? You bet I do. I know she meant it to be loving but it's caused problems for me and both my brothers. So I try so hard to make sure my kids won't ever have to deal with that sort of thing. It's one of my biggest concerns with my children. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1855891 Wed, 10 Sep 2014 08:43:13 +0000 lizzywiz 1855891@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@candymum: You know, I struggle with weight/self image a smidge, but I was always an ornery sort and I just KNEW it wasn't fair so mostly I was just mad. I definitely reward myself with food, but not the way I did when I was 16 and got my first car and could take myself to forbidden McDonald's!<br /> My mom honestly felt that she was helping us girls by trying to keep our weight down and that mentality still persists among that side of my family. I have a million aunts and uncles and almost all of my aunts (in their late 50's to late 60's) still chronically diet, some using pharmaceuticals and diuretics....And they talk about how cute/ not cute all of the girl grand-babies are.<br /> I don't live by the family hub, so only have to combat this mentality with a couple relatives who live by me.</p> <p>It is an extreme example, but I TOTALLY get how family culture and family assumptions can feel suffocating and detrimental once you see your LO subjected to it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1855808 Wed, 10 Sep 2014 07:51:12 +0000 candymum 1855808@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lizzywiz: I can't believe what I just read. Seperate meals for 1 st graders. My god. That would make having a healthy relationship with food later on soooo hard. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1855620 Tue, 09 Sep 2014 21:25:07 +0000 Blueberry 1855620@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have yourself 2 glasses!! I would be livid! But that's how it is sometimes with parents or in-laws. Ugh! My DS didn't sit up without support until he was 8 months old (and I got a lot of "he's going to be lazy, slow walker, etc") well, he walked by 10 months! Every baby is different and they tend to do things at their own pace- it's not a competition for them. Gotta love their thinking! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1855574 Tue, 09 Sep 2014 20:42:26 +0000 Vegmama 1855574@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd ask your husband to pull them aside and tell them to stop. You sound like an awesome, supportive mama! If all else fails, just tell them to eff off! ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1855552 Tue, 09 Sep 2014 20:24:46 +0000 Lindsay05 1855552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ugh! Just FYI, my 8 month old hasnt even moved anywhere yet to try and pull herself up and stand! Not worried at all, but I am pretty sure how an 8 month old acts isnt going to determine their athletic ability! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1855547 Tue, 09 Sep 2014 20:20:51 +0000 .twist. 1855547@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>wow. That is seriously rude. I would probably make a comment like, "nope, he isn't going to be an athlete because that's what you think he should be, and I don't want that for him". </p> <p>But, I'm a bitch. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1855516 Tue, 09 Sep 2014 19:51:31 +0000 Raindrop 1855516@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow so rude!! I'm sorry you are going through this. It must be tough! :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1855511 Tue, 09 Sep 2014 19:48:07 +0000 Tanjowen 1855511@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks ladies. I had that glass of wine and we are home now and I'm doing much better. I am trying very hard to just learn to let things roll off my shoulders, but when it's directed at my LO...watch out!</p> <p>Thanks for letting me vent and the listening *ears*! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852711 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 03:42:00 +0000 Dandelion 1852711@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, that's annoying. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852687 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 01:04:35 +0000 Greentea 1852687@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>People need to shove it! I am sorry they are saying those things, completely ridiculous! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852652 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 23:13:46 +0000 skibobrown 1852652@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds incredibly frustrating. I don't have a lot of advice on what to do, but I would definitely be very annoyed if I were in your shoes too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852625 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 22:14:39 +0000 PawPrints 1852625@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd be livid. I would definitely give them a piece of my mind before LO is old enough to start absorbing that messaging. It can soak in pretty early, sadly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852623 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 22:13:22 +0000 MrsStar 1852623@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs!! My in-laws say the same sort of things about my lo and compare her to her older male cousin(!!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852622 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 22:13:20 +0000 Mrs. J 1852622@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs! I think so long as they don't say anything to your baby, while it's rude, I'd ignore them for now. Just keep being a positive force in your son's life!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852611 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 21:57:13 +0000 jhd 1852611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs! I hope you can relax and enjoy that glass of wine. I have no advice, but that would definitely make me upset. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852608 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 21:53:45 +0000 lizzywiz 1852608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Tanjowen: that stuff is so hard. No advice, just commiserating. I grew up in a home where females were always supposed to be cognizant of the duty to be attractive- to the point that girls were fed different meals than boys due to calorie counting....in first grade (?!) And despite all of my efforts not to replicate that shit, my family ALWAYS comments on LO's looks/weight...she is two, WTF? How about just telling her she is doing awesome at this being alive thing? So, anyway, I get fighting against the family culture. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852604 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 21:42:46 +0000 mrsjyw 1852604@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ugh. Rude!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-just-need-to-vent-some#post-1852596 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 21:38:08 +0000 Tanjowen 1852596@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO is 8 months old. He's in the middle of teething, separation anxiety and trying to figure out the whole pulling up to stand thing. </p> <p>We are visiting my in-laws this week and I have heard multiple times how he's never going to be an athlete like his Daddy (because he's cautious about pulling up and afraid to fall down too), that I spoil him by picking him up when he's upset so he's going to never be aggressive enough to play sports, and that he's going to be so big it's going to make his kindergarten years hard (???). I'm so over it.</p> <p>A little background: I grew up in a very sexist home. I couldn't do things because "I am a girl." Examples are playing soccer and entering the police academy after graduating. I have always told my husband my biggest wish for my child is to let them know they can do anything they strive for, and I will cheer them on every step. I also personally believe that children can become what you expect them to be, like a self fulfilling prophecy type thing.</p> <p>So I know I'm sensitive about it, but seriously? He's 8 months old, quit making up your mind how he's going to be! And now I need a glass of wine... </p>