https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 25 Apr 2026 01:20:59 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174494 Thu, 31 May 2012 12:17:10 +0000 irene 174494@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I forgot to mention that my LO (4 months now) also used to HATE the crib. Somewhere between 1-2+ months old he would cry every time we place him in it as if we were punishing him and putting him in prison. I think that may be similar to your baby not willing to sleep in the co-sleeper let alone his own crib, which I really don't know why. However, they really do get used to it. We have a bedtime routine and I would say the exact same thing everyday before the bath, "We'll first take a bath, then we'll eat, then we'll go to sleep!" and he understands. By the time when we put him to his crib he is usually pretty happy, knowing that he's getting ready for the night of sleep.</p> <p>So hang in there, and yes buy a crib. It will be painful but he will sleep in it eventually, with a smile on his face. Your baby will grow up to be a little person and sleep in his own bed anyway, he's not always going to be in your bed! I'd do it now before he gets older, starts crying and climbing out of the crib himself if you know what I mean. It will be wayyy harder if you wait until then. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174359 Thu, 31 May 2012 10:50:48 +0000 LuLu Mom 174359@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with getting a crib and start transitioning him into his own space. Start a night time routine, do you use a sound machine or a bath to let him know it's time to start winding down? I would break him of the habit now before it becomes even more difficult, at 3 months he should be able to get into a routine. He may be unhappy the first couple nights, but once he realizes it's not changing back he should grow accustomed to his new bed! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174232 Thu, 31 May 2012 09:20:36 +0000 mamimami 174232@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There are some less harsh sleep training methods... one of my friends did one where she was constantly picking up the baby, calming her and putting her down until the baby was worn out and went to sleep. Seems exhausting to me but I guess it works for some people! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174221 Thu, 31 May 2012 09:01:37 +0000 sorrycharlie 174221@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not sure about much of the above advice since my LO isn't here yet. But. We researched the heck out of mattresses for cribs because our crib supposedly was larger than normal (thank you, incorrect reviews from miserable parents on BRU website!). </p> <p>we ended up buying a Simmons Naturally crib mattress from Target ($108, got it on sale for $85). It's organic and has two sides..a firmer side for infants and a less firm side for toddlers. There are reviews on there that say it made a world of difference for their babies based on comfort. I can't add to that because my baby isn't here yet, though! Just trying to help out a little if possible :( I feel so bad for you guys!</p> <p>ETA - no springs in the mattress, it's soy foam - not sure if that would help him out or not </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174219 Thu, 31 May 2012 08:59:38 +0000 cvbee 174219@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it's cozy that he likes maybe try a cozier swaddle blanket? This polar fleece one is magic for my LO. He likes to rub his litte chin on the collar area as he falls asleep, plus it has a really easy-to-use swaddle, which makes him feel like he is being held. Here it is: (<a href="http://www.amazon.com/SleepSack-Micro-Fleece-Swaddle-Cream-Small/dp/B001D7JO1U" rel="nofollow">http://www.amazon.com/SleepSack-Micro-Fleece-Swaddle-Cream-Small/dp/B001D7JO1U</a>)</p> <p>My friend has one who likes to rub her face on snuggly things too and although it's not recommended, she rolls up her baby's coziest blanket and puts it next to her LO so she can rub her face in it while she goes to sleep. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174213 Thu, 31 May 2012 08:54:36 +0000 T.H.O.U. 174213@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with others, it sounds like the co-sleeper is the issue. My LO doesn't sleep great in the pack and play because its too hard. I would go ahead and get a crib with a mattress and maybe even a mattress topper and sleep train towards that. </p> <p>I have also seen people with floor beds with a baby gate around them. What if you went ahead and got a twin/full size bed for the nursery and got him to sleep there with a gate around it? Then there really is no second transition! If its really just that he likes the bed (not necessarily because you are in the bed with him) I think this is the route I would go towards. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174211 Thu, 31 May 2012 08:44:22 +0000 irene 174211@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: For me I can't do co-sleeping.... my baby is 4 months old now and has been sleeping in his crib in his own room since he was 1 month old (or younger, I forgot), per our pediatrician's suggestion.</p> <p>When we first came home we moved his crib to our room. Then after our pediatrician told us to move him back to his room, the first night was quite brutal. He would cry and cry and we were so busy having to go over and sooth him. However the 2nd and 3rd night he got used to it and he was able to sleep in his own room just like he was in our room.</p> <p>Another thing is we don't let him fall asleep in our arms. Pediatrician says always lay him in his crib awake so he learns to fall asleep on his own. It was a brutal 2 months before he learns how to sooth himself to sleep, but now he falls asleep in his own crib with no problems.</p> <p>He still wakes once or twice at night, but I went over and fed him and he falls back to sleep pretty quickly on his own. (Knock on wood I didn't jinx anything)</p> <p>So for me, I think you have to be heartless and do the transition: put him back to his crib to sleep. It is going to be hard but the pain is also short - maybe a few nights of crying. Then he will know oh this is how it is supposed to be. Like ripping off a band-aid. To me it is better to train him now then when he's 1 or 2 years old and is still in your bed, or if the baby becomes one of those kids from the Super Nanny show where they kept getting up and cry when the parents try to put them to bed...etc.</p> <p>I dunno.... that's my 2 cents.... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174090 Wed, 30 May 2012 22:00:18 +0000 Mrs. Pen 174090@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rubies: oh, I see. so that there's no "second transition"? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174088 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:56:48 +0000 Rubies 174088@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: Oh, my thought was to just start having him learn to sleep in the place he'll end up sleeping for good. Like, getting rid of the co-sleeper altogether. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174087 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:54:33 +0000 Mrs. Pen 174087@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rubies: My goal isn't even sleeping through the night. I'm totally fine with night feedings until he's nearly a year, or at least til he starts solids. My goal is just to get him out of our bed!! </p> <p>I'm just not sure how putting his crib in our room would help considering he won't sleep in his cosleeper which is right next to us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174086 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:53:45 +0000 Rubies 174086@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: Also, I just counted - when we sleep-trained LO, she was exactly 14 weeks and 4 days old.</p> <p>Does your LO show any signs of self-soothing? Like, sucking fingers/thumb? Do you swaddle him? Does he take a pacifier? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174084 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:51:43 +0000 Rubies 174084@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: When I think back (or look at pictures) to when LO was 3.5 months old, I want to cry because she looks sooooo small! I thought 3.5 months was soooo young! But, like I had written, sleep-training was our only option and I made an informed decision to do so. My initial goal was for LO to get longer stretches of sleep and to learn to soothe herself to sleep - not so much to sleep through the night. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174083 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:48:17 +0000 Rubies 174083@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: How about buying a crib and placing it in your room? I don't know, I'm just throwing out a bunch of ideas. I totally know how tough it can be. Does LO like car rides? What used to work for us is driving until LO fell asleep and then carrying her in the house still strapped to her carseat. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174082 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:48:12 +0000 Mrs. Pen 174082@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cyneswith: yeah that's what we were looking at. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174081 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:47:42 +0000 Mrs. Pen 174081@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rubies: BTW it was your guest post that prompted me to write this post. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it! My son is almost the age your daughter was when you sleep trained, he is 14 weeks. Would you *normally* advise sleep training this early? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174080 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:47:07 +0000 cyneswith 174080@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A convertible crib would be a good option. Then it'd at least serve as a toddler bed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174079 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:46:16 +0000 Mrs. Pen 174079@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rubies: I actually think it's TOO firm. I think he likes our bed because it's cozier..<br /> The goal is yes, to have him in a crib, in his room. But it's so not going well that I worry buying a crib may be a waste of money, if we can't get him out of our bed! But you're right, it's probably best to get him trained in his crib from the start. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-174077 Wed, 30 May 2012 21:40:20 +0000 Rubies 174077@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Eventually, where will your LO end up sleeping? In a crib, in his room, by himself? In a crib, in your room? If your goal is to have LO sleep on his own in a crib, then I would buy a crib. It sounds as though maybe the co-sleeper might be part of the problem...Maybe it's not firm enough? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-173804 Wed, 30 May 2012 16:04:58 +0000 Mrs. Pen 173804@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Boogs: We were wondering that... We've been looking into cribs, but my husband is very hesitant to spend the money on one if we don't even know if LO will sleep in it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172910 Wed, 30 May 2012 01:17:08 +0000 Boogs 172910@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Since it seems like your LO hates the cosleeper, have you considered getting him an actual crib to sleep in? Maybe the cosleeper isn't very comfortable but a crib might be? </p> <p>When our LO was around that age he was still sleeping pretty horribly at night, but once we moved him to his crib he immediately started sleeping at least 8 hours stretches! Teething ended up messing that up and we had to sleep train, but he was clearly much more comfortable sleeping in his own space. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172905 Wed, 30 May 2012 00:32:57 +0000 lemondrop 172905@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would buy a new bed and move into the nursery ;) </p> <p>Sorry, no wisdom here, just wishing you guys luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172902 Tue, 29 May 2012 23:40:25 +0000 Mrs. Pen 172902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@HeatherlovesKenny: I have a love hate relationship with cosleeping. I love the ease of it; night feedings and special "hang out in bed" morning times. But I miss cuddling with my husband, pulling the blankets all the way up and sleeping in whatever position I wish! Lol I just keep reminding myself parenting doesn't end at 8pm and I have to be patient. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172899 Tue, 29 May 2012 23:38:05 +0000 Mrs. Pen 172899@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@prettylizy: been there done that :) from day one I was putting my breast pads and shirts in his cosleeper. I've tried it continually but it hasn't worked.</p> <p>@skibobrown: Lol yeah he hated both initially, he will "play" in the swing and tolerate the bouncer while I make dinner but he won't sleep in them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172887 Tue, 29 May 2012 23:17:26 +0000 HLK208 172887@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have any great advice, just sympathy! Co-sleeping can be hard especially when you're breastfeeding throughout the night. We did this with DS and I was so worn out for awhile. By 6 months we finally got him to sleep in the crib by rocking him and setting him down before his eyes closed--he would sleep until midnight and wake up for a feeding then one more at 4am and usually would sleep until 7 or 8. Eventually I caved and tried the CIO method at 9 months. It killed me! But after 3 rough nights, we got him to sleep through the night.</p> <p>I hope it goes easier for you and someone can recommend something that works! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172881 Tue, 29 May 2012 23:05:00 +0000 prettylizy 172881@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: this is just a random thought, but coud it e your smell in your bed that he loves? Since he will sleep there on his own? What if you wore or slept with the sheets or blankets he will be using. I don't know if it will help, but that's the only thing I could think of. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172877 Tue, 29 May 2012 22:58:50 +0000 skibobrown 172877@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hmm... have you tried putting him in a swing or a bouncy chair to sleep? A lot of babies seem to crave the constant motion. </p> <p>Good luck!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172843 Tue, 29 May 2012 21:32:53 +0000 Mrs. Pen 172843@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jacks: He will sleep in our bed without us just fine. He takes his day naps on our bed, and he goes to bed 7:30-8pm and we don't come to bed until about 11pm. So he CAN sleep on his own, he just only wants our bed!</p> <p>and honestly, I want to have our intimate time in my own bed lol not on the couch/floor etc. Just not comfortable, especially for my first time since having a kid. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172839 Tue, 29 May 2012 21:26:39 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 172839@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wish I had words of wisdom for you. Lala was exactly the same way, and after trying so hard to get her to sleep any where besides in between us, we just changed the way we thought about it. To get some mommy daddy time, we'd put her down in our bed and then go downstairs for awhile. </p> <p>I will say that if you want to make changes, earlier rather than later is better. Many people say 6 months is the sweet spot, but you've got to do what works for your family! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-need-sleep-help#post-172832 Tue, 29 May 2012 21:16:51 +0000 Mrs. Pen 172832@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son is 14 weeks (3 months) old. We bought the arms reach co sleeper for him, and form day 1 he never slept in it for more than 15-20 minutes at a time. We spent the entire first month of his life taking turns holding him through the night since it was the only way he slept. Every few days or so I'd try him in the cosleeper again, and if he slept, it was never more than half an hour. The only place he would sleep? our bed. He will take 2-3 hour naps on our bed, and he worked himself into our bed at night. It's the only way any of us get any sleep is by cosleeping. For awhile I didn't mind it, and it sure was nice to breastfeed him while half-asleep and never have to "wake up" to feed him. But it's taking it's toll on me and I don't think I can do it anymore. My husband and I still haven't had sex since he was born because he's always in our bed! I am ready to just sleep with my husband, and I want LO to be okay with sleeping on his own before he's old enough to develop a sleep habit of only sleeping with us.</p> <p>But, being that he's only three months old - "sleep-training" seems wrong to me. I've tried more gentle approaches, as he cries when I set him down, comfort him by laying my hand on his chest, shushing him - but he just cries and cries and cries until I pick him up. He gets these huge tears that roll down his cheeks and seriously hearing/watching him cry breaks my heart so badly I start bawling! I can't do it. So I always give in and pick him up. Then I'll sway and shush him in my arms until he's mostly asleep, set him back in the cosleeper, and he wakes up crying again. I don't know what to do! Even when he can see me, he still cries.<br /> We are going on vacation at the end of June and if will be an awful vacation if I can't get him to sleep on his own.. and quite frankly I really miss being with my husband! </p> <p>Any ideas? Tonight we basically had "unintentional" CIO. I sat next to him where he could see me, I gave him his pacifier and soothed him without holding him, and he cried and cried and cried for 20 minutes until I picked him up. </p> <p>I don't want him to cosleep until he's 4 like other cosleeping families I know! I want to sleep too.<br /> Oh, and I think that BECAUSE we cosleep right now, he has been waking up MORE often to nurse. He will be up like 4 times at night because my boob is just right there!! </p>