https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 14 May 2026 04:02:57 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1426493 Sat, 15 Feb 2014 15:48:21 +0000 blackbird 1426493@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I pumped for awhile and then quit. Wasn't worth it :heart: </p> <p>My quality of life went way up afterwards, too! It's ok! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1426466 Sat, 15 Feb 2014 15:24:11 +0000 MrsH 1426466@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MapleMoose: @MrsF: @heffalump: @meredithNYC: @LuLu Mom: @yoursilverlining: @Mamasig: @skibobrown: I just wanted to thank each of you for sharing - I know BFing conversations can turn very competitive and hearing your stories makes me feel better about the other side of things. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1422850 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 22:06:48 +0000 MapleMoose 1422850@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO had an intense latch and I ended up with bruised nipples. I had to let them heal so I pumped and used all purpose nipple ointment (APNO), a prescription from the LC. I tried BF a few times after the nips healed but LO would get frustrated because she was used to the immediate flow from bottles. I had to supplement with formula from day 1 in the hospital so I just kept giving formula and pumped milk. I was able to provide pumped milk until LO was 3.5 months. Now I quit pumping, LO is on formula only, and the only thing that has changed is that I'm no longer stressed from worrying about output, pumping schedules, boosting my supply, time away from LO, etc. My child is growing and happy so that's what matters. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1422792 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 21:53:23 +0000 MrsF 1422792@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>BF was really hard for me and with a colicky (later diagnosed MSPI) baby and PPD mama I was really teetering on the edge. I remember seeing Giuliana Rancic on TV one day and being envious of her because nobody would expect her to BF. She had breast cancer!!! I realized then that I was doing it for other people and not for me or for M. I broke down to my DH that day and started weaning her to formula the next day. That was at three months and honestly it was the best decision that I could have made for both of us at the time. I'm proud to have given her three months of BM, but she needed a sane mama more than she needed my milk. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1422773 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 21:46:58 +0000 yin 1422773@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO made no progress after a week, and I had already started to EP on day 2. I supplemented with formula for over a month before my supply could catch up with his demand. It was rough and both mentally and physically draining. I think supply is established around 12 weeks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1422749 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 21:42:26 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 1422749@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We also had issue after issue. Things started to turn around at about 6 weeks. I really just made very small goals to get to that point and it was definitely worth it in the long run. Hang in there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1422692 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 21:29:35 +0000 heffalump 1422692@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It got to the point where I dreaded feeding and cried each time. I felt like it just wasn't healthy for either of us. And I quit. We both were happier and lo is perfectly healthy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1422678 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 21:24:18 +0000 daniellemybelle 1422678@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had/have low supply &amp; went through the same struggles. At about 4 weeks I stopped pumping - I just nursed &amp; supplemented. At that point LO was still pretty content to nurse. I thought about quitting so many times &amp; I think about it now that she has gotten to be a very fussy, frustrated nurser. But I am so glad I pushed through. Despite our issues we do have a good nursing relationship - she loves to comfort nurse if she is not starving. And I feel proud that I have given her breastmilk this long.</p> <p>Having said that, I do sometimes think about if I had just stopped in the beginning, if I would have been happier. I have shed so many tears over breastfeeding. But I remind myself that it's really hard for almost everyone - whether it's supply or latch or mastitis or what have you. </p> <p>Hugs! Good luck whatever you decide! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1422614 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 21:12:06 +0000 HappyBaker 1422614@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wish someone had told me that it was okay to just STOP. I was miserable and going through a lot of the same as you were, and I felt so much guilt from friends and family that I just keep soldiering on. We did end up making it to almost 10 months, but I never enjoyed it and the stress / anxiety of it all honestly made my maternity leave and first few months with my daughter pretty miserable. I think if we had just given up earlier things would have been totally different for the better, and I could have focused on being a mom instead of just a feeding machine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1422263 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 20:18:23 +0000 MrsStormy 1422263@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: Honestly breastfeeding is one of the hardest if not the hardest thing I have ever done. I was ready to quit when she was about 5 days old, everything about it is hard. I went to the lactation consultant so many times, I powered through super painful feeds, I nursed for HOURS everyday, DD was little and didn't gain a ton (enough, just barely) and it was pretty miserable. I have no idea why I stuck with it, I wasn't even that committed to nursing before I had DD, but I did, and eventually it did get better, so there is light at the end of the tunnel. She has still never had formula (5 months old), and I am incredibly proud of how far we have made it.</p> <p>However I think because of how hard BFing was in the beginning it took me longer to bond with my daughter, it caused me to feed depressed and sad, and even regretful of having a child. I feel sad when I think about that time and I wish I would have cut myself some slack, and stopped stressing about BF. It is totally okay to quit. It is totally okay to supplement. It is totally okay to push through and continue to BF. You just need to do what is best for you and baby, and only you know what that is. Good luck, and relax, it will get better no matter what you decide.</p> <p>ETA: Everytime it started to get a little better, it would then get a little worse shortly after, it was consistently 1 step forward 2 steps back, until it was just plain better, so if you stick it out be prepared for that. Also I really don't find nursing to be a "bonding" experience, I'm glad we are still going with it for a variety of reasons, but bonding is not one of them, and that was something I constantly worried about, so there is my opinion for what it is worth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1421872 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 19:04:52 +0000 MrsH 1421872@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@AmandaB8: I hope it gets easier for you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420834 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 14:24:15 +0000 looch 1420834@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If I could do it all over again, I would have used the nipple shield longer, but I don't really know if my supply would ever have been enough. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420814 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 14:20:22 +0000 AmandaB8 1420814@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My LO isn't latching either. I have a fantastic supply though. I EP, and we try to breast feed with a shield twice a day. It doesn't work the best, but I'm hoping she gets better. I'd like to just breast feed at 3am! </p> <p>My LO is 4 weeks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420604 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 13:35:04 +0000 jetsa 1420604@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: DS has had formula but truthfully I just kept it up. It is the absolute hardest thing I've ever done. I wrote several posts on it and it didn't get easier until he got bigger (3 months or so) now he's almost 20 lbs at 5 months and its easy peasy ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420570 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 13:27:32 +0000 Kemma 1420570@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@coopsmama: we had three visits to an osteopath with our LO and it definitely helped!</p> <p>@MrsH: I think you need to do whatever is going to be best for YOUR emotional health. That could be pushing through with bf'ing, it could be going to exclusively formula feeding or it could be mixed feeding.</p> <p>In the meantime, is it possible for you to back off on the pumping? I'm just thinking that cutting some of the pumping might give you a little breathing space with which to enjoy your LO and give you a small break.</p> <p>Hang in there, Mama - you're doing a wonderful job! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420566 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 13:25:27 +0000 meredithNYC 1420566@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was in your exact situation. Was eating and drinking around the clock to stimulate production, took herbal supplements, saw an LC, pumped like a mad woman and still my LO was losing weight. The stress of the feeding issues, total lack of sleep, combined with my husband's long hours and the lack of family nearby plus PPD made my daughter's newborn days a nightmare for me.</p> <p>I started supplementing around 3 weeks and by 3.5 months I was completely done breastfeeding. I immediately enjoyed spending time with daughter SO much more. But getting to that point was hard. I beat myself up so much over it all - never thinking that I would ever find myself in such a position. I just kind of thought breastfeeding would work for me. I cried many, many tears over the decision. In hindsight, I wish I would have had a healthier attitude towards formula feeding and just accepted that it's okay, you know? My LO is nearly 2 now and she's healthy and happy. If I found myself in the same situation with our next child, I wouldn't give myself so much guilt. </p> <p>Whatever you decide, good luck! And know that there are many, many moms here who will support you regardless of your choice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420528 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 13:15:39 +0000 Greentea 1420528@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It was one of the hardest things I have ever gone through but somehow I survived. I think that was pretty much all I did- try to breastfeed. I would not have believed anyone but I will say it anyway- if you can find a way to survive it is worth it. Are you eating okay? I thought it was insanely hard and struggled through some crazy pain, stress, and constant boob handling in one form or another but it did eventually work out. Sending good vibes to you. You are doing great and as much as you can get in LO is great! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420487 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 13:05:44 +0000 coopsmama 1420487@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My DS started out breastfeeding really well back in June when he was born. We had no latch issues, and he just went to town. Around 4-5 weeks that all changed and suddenly he became fussy at the breast and seemed to develop reflux type symptoms. He started refusing to nurse at all and I had to start pumping and giving bottles. </p> <p>We actually took him to a chiropractor that specializes in pediatrics. I was really skeptical, but he was apparently majorly "out of whack" for lack of a better term and the chiro said that the adjustment should take care of everything. I took him home, pulled out my boob ;), and what do you know? He latched! And nursed! And we were able to nurse exclusively until November when my supply tanked after I got pregnant. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420445 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:54:51 +0000 LuLu Mom 1420445@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I EP until 10 weeks due to LO refusing to latch (no matter what we tried) and then switched to formula, you just have to do what's feels right for you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420401 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:40:56 +0000 yoursilverlining 1420401@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When BF wasn’t working out for us, I quit. I did it without (much) guilt or tears; BF isn’t easy and doesn’t work for so.many.women and babies. Formula isn’t the devil’s milk that some people (on here and otherwise) make it out to be – I just wanted a sane, happy, healthy mama and a well-fed, well-nourished, happy baby. I wasn’t interested in taking tons of herbal supplements because all that is passed through milk too like everything you ingest; and many herbal supplements have not been FDA evaluated or approved. We bonded just fine during feedings with bottles. I hope whatever decision you make, you do it without too much guilt, sadness or shame. There’s no need to feel like you haven’t tried “hard enough” or that you somehow are lacking!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420376 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:32:30 +0000 Mamasig 1420376@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, I quit. I didn't last long - I think only to about 2 1/2 weeks. I was a hormonal, sleep deprived, depressed mess. I wasn't enjoying my child because I was constantly worried about his eating or pumping. And then I would stress and pump less. When I gave him a bottle of formula he chugged it down happy and content. I thought - why am I forcing this so hard? He isn't enjoying it. So I quit. At first, I felt so bad and cried and cried. But then I saw how he grew and loved me the same. Breastfeeding just didn't work out for us and now I realize that's ok. </p> <p>I'm not saying to quit - that's totally up to you. I just wanted to give you my perspective. Reading through the boards, I hardly see people who say they quit. Makes me feel like minority. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420329 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:13:31 +0000 skibobrown 1420329@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was in your exact situation, and I couldn't push through. My husband went back to work and was working very long hours. I had no family or friends nearby to help, and there was no way for me to do all of that pumping, and the supplemental nursing system, all while watching my newborn daughter. In the end I decided to stop pumping. I would just give my daughter whatever breastmilk she was able to get during a feeding, and then I would give her a bottle of formula afterward so she could get the rest of the calories she needed. My supply never improved, and my daughter eventually lost interest in BF, so I quit entirely once I went back to work. I did feel immense guilt over these decisions, so much so that it contributed to my severe case of PPD that I experienced. I just want to tell you that you do not have to feel guilty if BF isn't working for you. Formula is amazing stuff, and lots of smart and healthy adults were raised on it as babies. Spending more than half of every day pumping and the rest of the time cleaning pump supplies and bottles and fretting about my milk supply was no way for me to live my life, and it might not be for you either. That is 100% your decision to make. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420322 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:11:15 +0000 hilsy85 1420322@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: just wrote on your wall! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420310 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:07:04 +0000 Mrs. Twine 1420310@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a similar experience with Ellie and I stuck with it. Looking back, I'm glad that I did, but I know pushing on doesn't work for everyone. Eventually we went to nursing first, and then finishing with a bottle for every feed, even MOTN. We went on to have a great nursing relationship that I look back on with lots of love and fondness! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420308 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:06:22 +0000 Ra 1420308@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a really tough time at first. I pushed through, but like @hilsy85, it was never great. Things got much, much easier but I never recovered from my supply issues. Looking back, I wish I hadn't been so hard on myself. I'm glad I fought and was able to give him at least some breastmilk until 6 months, but I spent more time in the beginning obsessing about it than enjoying my son. That, I regret.</p> <p>I posted about it here <a href="http://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-am-not-a-failure#post-948238" rel="nofollow">http://boards.hellobee.com/topic/i-am-not-a-failure#post-948238</a>. It felt good just writing a letter and getting all my feelings out.</p> <p>You are doing a great job! Don't let BFing consume you. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420302 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:04:28 +0000 MrsH 1420302@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hilsy85: @lawbee11: I'll try and look back at @hilsy85's posts. Thanks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420290 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:00:46 +0000 lawbee11 1420290@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hilsy85: I was going to suggest she write on your wall because I remember you went through the ringer! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420286 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 12:00:20 +0000 autumnlove 1420286@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It was awful but it improved around 5 weeks for me.</p> <p>Good luck with whatever you choose! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420281 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 11:57:43 +0000 hilsy85 1420281@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>BFing was awful for me at first, and I told myself I'd give it til 6 weeks. That was when everyone said it got better. It wasn't GREAT at that point for me but it was better. </p> <p>That being said, there's no right or wrong answer. The important thing is that baby is fed, and that you are ok. Happy mama, happy baby! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-bfing-just-didnt-seem-to-be-working-for-you#post-1420278 Thu, 13 Feb 2014 11:55:30 +0000 Charm54 1420278@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>:( I'm sorry you are going through this. At 2 weeks I stopped bfing and started EPing as I had a lot of the same struggles. That being said bfing was never a huge goal of mine and I never enjoyed it so it didn't stress me out to give it up. LO is 5 months and gets about 1/2 bm 1/2 formula (used to be 3/4 bm but my supply took a hit when I got the flu last week) ... She's a happy and healthy little girl :) </p>