https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 04 May 2026 04:39:35 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1370058 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 11:24:08 +0000 MrsH 1370058@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think bit will be us, my mom and bro, and a couple of friends. I could be wrong and the in laws could surprise me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1370023 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 11:14:24 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 1370023@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Right now it's just me and DH and it's one of the reasons I am excited to move later this year. For a while it was also my moms group but over the last 6 months everyone has slowly moved away. I personally feel that kiddos need more than just parents as positive adult role models. DH grew up with a large village and I grew up with almost none and we would prefer to emulate his childhood. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369771 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 10:17:42 +0000 LuLu Mom 1369771@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH &amp; I<br /> grandparents &amp; great grandparents<br /> aunts, uncle, &amp; cousins<br /> in home daycare provider &amp; helper (and daughters who love her) close friends</p> <p>We have a full &amp; mighty village for DD! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369768 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 10:17:03 +0000 bushelandapeck 1369768@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For us it's:</p> <p>Nanny<br /> Preschool<br /> My mom's group and the lovely ladies I have met through it</p> <p>I am so thankful to have so many amazing people in LO's life since we don't have any family nearby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369732 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 10:07:53 +0000 travelgirl1 1369732@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: :heart: </p> <p>Our entire families live overseas so our village is super small.<br /> Just me and DH, really. But I know if I need help, @oliviaoblivia: and @californiadreams: plus a girl I know from WB would definitely be there for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369724 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 10:06:21 +0000 blackbird 1369724@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Me and DH, MIL, and her in-home sitters, who watch her during the week. </p> <p>Our village is small but mighty :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369705 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 10:02:57 +0000 BeachMama 1369705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I LOVE that we live close enough to family to have our "village" Ours consists of:</p> <p>Mom and Dad</p> <p>Grandma and Grandpa (my parents, who babysit 2x week)</p> <p>Daycare (she goes 3 full days)</p> <p>Auntie Kirsty (my SIL babysits on occasion)</p> <p>Auntie Becky (my sister, doesn't really babysit, but comes to visit)</p> <p>Nanny and Papa (my ILs that live far away, but come for visits) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369657 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:53:01 +0000 Aimed 1369657@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I totally agree but at the moment we don't have one as we live far from our families and are just settling into a new area.<br /> However I am trying to foster the idea but putting pictures of our LO with his grandparents, aunts, uncles etc on his wall under a decal of 'all the people that love me'.<br /> Hopefully it will give him a sense that there are more people in his life than just his parents! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369585 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:31:07 +0000 autumnlove 1369585@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents had a few friends they relied on. I guess my village consists of daycare on a regular basis and MIL, SIL every few months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369567 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:28:49 +0000 Weagle 1369567@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our friends here, mainly ones we met at church. I think of the "village" being people that you see at least weekly. While our parents and families are involved, we only see them every few months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369564 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:28:10 +0000 oliviaoblivia 1369564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds like you have a great village!</p> <p>Ours is small. We live far from my family and DH's family is disappointingly disinterested.</p> <p>DD has</p> <p>Mama &amp; Dada<br /> Travelgirl1 (she and her daughter spend four days a week with LO while I'm at work)<br /> FIL (but he's elderly and out of the country for half the year....not really helpful)<br /> A few aunts but we've seen my parents more lately despite them living a plane ride away and my SIL's literally living down the street.<br /> And my mom friends.</p> <p>this bums me out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369555 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:26:17 +0000 Greentea 1369555@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We don't have one and I don't agree! Parents affect you the most! But golly you are luuucky if you do!</p> <p>@mrs. wagon: we do not have a village! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369547 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:24:51 +0000 mrs. wagon 1369547@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cherrybee: thanks!! It has been very tough sometimes. Sometimes even finding a dogsitter when we go away gets me so frustrated. But it will make it all that much sweeter when our close friends move near us... very soon! </p> <p>It makes my heart happy that you have such a great village around you...!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369526 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:21:01 +0000 illumina 1369526@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cherrybee: I'm so glad you have such a supportive village--E is a lucky little girl :) </p> <p>S has us (her Mum and Dad) and my parents who often have her one afternoon per week. I guess I should count my new mummy friends that I've met since we relocated. There are at least 6 of us and our babies that meet twice a week at each other's houses and one of the mamas lives a 5min walk from my house so I tend to see her a little more often. They are super supportive and always keen to hear how S is getting on. </p> <p>Everyone else lives at least 4hrs away and has only seen her once or twice since she was born. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369504 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:16:16 +0000 Synchronicity 1369504@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We don't have kids yet, but we will certainly have a village to help us raise them when we do. Our families are beyond excited for us to start a family; example: my MIL already has a schedule planned out in her head for shared babysitting duties between her and my mom. Sigh.</p> <p>Off the top of my head, our village will consist of:</p> <p>- My parents: already planning trips to the cottage with LO - getting slightly ahead of themselves, I think!<br /> - SO's parents: my MIL has baby rabies ;)<br /> - My two sisters (one might be living with us for a year or two while she is in school - built in babysitter!)<br /> - SO's siblings (sister and brother/SIL)<br /> - my Aunt and Uncle: they are like second parents to me, I grew up very close to them and cannot wait for them to be part of our kids' lives<br /> - My grandma: she is the only one of my 4 grandparents who is still "with it" enough to help with care, but all grandparents will be involved in LO's life<br /> - Close friends: I tend to make friends most easily with people who are a little older than me, so many of my friends have already raised kids of their own. Their help will be invaluable to me in the future!<br /> - All of the Hellobee mommies! Seriously, you guys give amazing advice, and to be able to log on 24/7 for support... priceless. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369503 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:16:15 +0000 Cherrybee 1369503@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@locavore_mama: I agree. My BIL and his wife (and their baby, due in a few weeks) will be a part of her life but not a part of her village - she will see them but they will not "raise" her or be part of that process. </p> <p>@mrs. wagon: I'm so sorry you don't have a good support network around you at the moment. That must be really challenging, raising two children by yourselves. I underestimated how much I would need a break when I was expecting E! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369489 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:12:59 +0000 Running Elley 1369489@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents<br /> MIL and FIL<br /> BILs<br /> The mom's group at our church </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369480 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:09:15 +0000 Smurfette 1369480@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I<br /> Day care teachers (Mostly 2 of the 4)<br /> My parents<br /> My sister (since she babysits)<br /> Rest of our families </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369479 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:08:42 +0000 regberadaisy 1369479@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't know....when I think of the "village" I think of people who step up and offer to help ALL the time. Like my mom.</p> <p>But I will begrudgingly admit that the ILs and BIL are considered part of our village. Because the ILs spend Wednesdays with her (we asked) and they will help us go pick her up from daycare if she's sick which IS a huge help. We never ask BIL for anything but like the other day DH &amp; I were both sick and he offered to go pick LO up at daycare for us.</p> <p>And I don't know if I would consider daycare part of our village since we pay them! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369477 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:08:17 +0000 Mae 1369477@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Certainly us and our parents. My parents especially because they live closer and will see her (I'd imagine) at least once monthly. I hope that my brother and SIL are a frequent part of her life, but honestly I don't know. Probably also some of my close friends who we spend a lot of time with. I'm pro "aunty and uncle" for friends who are important to you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369472 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:07:10 +0000 Anagram 1369472@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Cherrybee: such a good question.and I'm glad you have such a good village!</p> <p>Now that I have LO, I really really appreciate the "village" I have. There's me and Dh, his parents (who have been quite literally a god send) and my mom (also amazing). Both of them live a few hours flight away, but they are willing to fly to see and help us which is great. There are our extended families (Dh's sister and her family, my sisters). </p> <p>And finally, I've joined two mom groups that have been immensely, immsensely helpful to me. I honestly don't know where I would be without those women. They have been my go-to for all my new mommy questions, as well as just a reason to get out of the house. I feel very lucky in that area. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369467 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 09:05:28 +0000 mrs. wagon 1369467@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I really believe in this but unfortunately we currently don't have a village. :( our two couple friends who live very close by don't have children, and only 1 out of the 4 of them is interested in kids at all, and asks to babysit and spend time with them. So we are very lucky to have her, but she's extremely busy with two jobs and many hobbies so we try not to take up too much of her time. We have a couple of other families that we'd totally village it up with, but they all live more than 30 mins away. We do our best on weekends to get together. All our family lives far away: 4 hr drive or 6-7 hr drive. Two of my childhood best friends have started their families but live on the opposite coast :(</p> <p>Close friends of ours are planning on moving very close to us this year, so I am very very very psyched for us to be each other's village!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-it-takes-a-village-who-is-in-your-village#post-1369270 Thu, 23 Jan 2014 07:52:48 +0000 Cherrybee 1369270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not sure where it comes from but the saying "It takes a village to raise a child" is one we have all heard plenty of times. </p> <p>I didn't have that kind of upbringing, really - it was always just me and my mum against the world (I even went to her evening cleaning job with her!) and I wouldn't recognise my aunts/uncles/cousins if I crossed them in the street; grandparents were old people you "visited" once in a blue moon and were not really a part of your life. </p> <p>In truth, that was the parenting experience I had wanted for myself and, while pregnant, I couldn't bear the thought of sharing my baby (or losing control, I guess). But it isn't the experience I got - and I couldn't be happier! </p> <p>My daughter's "village" consists of: </p> <p>- Her mum and dad (us)</p> <p>- Her nanny and grandad (inlaws) who will have her three days a week when I go back to work (currently have her one day a week)</p> <p>- Her daycare teachers who she will spend two days a week with from 20/2/14.</p> <p>- Her "Auntie Joy" (and elderly lady my inlaws visit, who I've never met! They take E to see her every week!! She sees her more than she sees my mum!!). </p> <p>- Her nana (my mum) who she will see maybe once a month but will hopefully spend more time with once she gets a bit older. </p> <p>- My BFF and her son who is a few months older than her. The kids will grow up together! </p> <p>I actually really love that she has a lot of people in her life who love her. I love it when she learns new things at my inlaws' house - for example last week she learned to put a spoon to her mouth! I thought I'd be jealous and resentful when she did new things for them but actually it's awesome that she has so many opportunities to learn from so many people. Plus it gives me a break!!</p> <p>Does your LO have a "village"? Who is in that "village"? How do you feel about the concept? How do you feel about your situation? </p>