Hellobee Boards Topic: If you could redshirt, would you?

Hellobee Boards Topic: If you could redshirt, would you? https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 26 May 2026 14:01:35 +0000 immabeetoo on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868811 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 16:50:00 +0000 immabeetoo 1868811@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I am concerned the opposite way- LO shares a late bday with me. I started early, graduated early, and didn't turn 18 until halfway through freshman year of college. I would've been bored out of my mind another year behind and already was awkwardly attempted to move up for reading (major failure). I would never consider it unless there were glaring motivators, but as it is I'm worried about him being bored out of his mind if we follow the public schedule :/ sunny on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868799 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 16:45:07 +0000 sunny 1868799@https://boards.hellobee.com/ LO has an end of August birthday and the cutoff is Aug 31. I would not hold her back unless she was below what is considered "normal" developmentally for kids of her age. Where I come from (tiger parents abound), everyone is trying to get their kids up to the next higher grade. Mrs.KMM on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868786 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 16:37:36 +0000 Mrs.KMM 1868786@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I wouldn't. I have an April 27th birthday and DH has a May 12th birthday (and we both grew up with a June 1 school cutoff) so we were both always one of the youngest in our classes. Despite this, we both excelled academically (to the point of being bored during various times in our education). I don't think being among the youngest is really a hindrance at all. Mrs. Jacks on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868733 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 16:00:15 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 1868733@https://boards.hellobee.com/ While kids who red shirt do better in the short run by outperforming their peers, in the long run there is no good evidence to say that it confers advantage. Therefore, I would err on the side of not red shirting unless there was a strong cognitive or social reason to do so. lovehoneybee on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868730 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 15:58:54 +0000 lovehoneybee 1868730@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I don't know. E has an early August birthday, and I think the cutoff is Sept 1st here. We're just going to wait and see what he's like closer to that time. D and a BIL are both also August babies. BIL was not held back a year, D was. My ILs felt that D just wasn't quite emotionally ready for kindergarten., whereas BIL was. She said she never regretted the decision. ChiCalGoBee on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868696 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 15:39:07 +0000 ChiCalGoBee 1868696@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Maysprout: Mrs. Bee asked if any of us would "red shirt," or hold a student back. My reply was that from what I've heard from experts in the field is that a student should be 5 by the time s/he enters kinder. I then mentioned that I personally found for many boys as well as some girls that social/emotional maturity tends to be more of an issue than academic maturity/readiness (which should be differentiated for by a good teacher regardless of age) in a younger student than an older student. You're welcome to wall me if you want to continue the convo :happy: , as I feel like you are somehow offended when I was merely joining in the conversation as someone who's had some experience with this. Mrs. Juice on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868612 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 14:50:39 +0000 Mrs. Juice 1868612@https://boards.hellobee.com/ This is alway such an emotional topic! I know every parent wants the best for their child... I'm still not completely over the fact that our school did not let us hold HJ back, so I am definitely on the side of letting the parents choose... Dandelion on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868605 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 14:45:39 +0000 Dandelion 1868605@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Depends on the kid. With D (with a bday in August), I won't. He's the youngest in his class, but when they did MAPS testing this month, he was way ahead of where he is supposed to be. He's always been smart. If he was struggling, redshirting would have been considered. M is a March baby, so it's moot. Maysprout on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868593 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 14:41:47 +0000 Maysprout 1868593@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @ChiCalGoBee: I guess I'm a little confused. Are you saying you found social/ emotional maturity is a bigger concern than reading/ academic ability because they're more likely to be held back or what factors make it the bigger concern? I guess id just question if I heard someone say girls should start school later and think it seemed a bit sexist since I don't think either sex has an inherent intellectual advantage over the other. ChiCalGoBee on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868563 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 14:20:13 +0000 ChiCalGoBee 1868563@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Maysprout: I didn't say anything about reading/academic ability. I found as a kindergarten teacher and as a research student that the bigger concerns were social/emotional maturity. As an aside, i had a female student with an August 31st birthday who was incredibly socially immature, and also had potty accidents multiple times a week-her parents said they wish they'd held her. Like i said, it totally depends on the kid! I agree that a lot needs to change in the public school system :happy: . However, any good teacher should be differentiating for academic needs, and that would help with the boredom. loveisstrange on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868550 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 14:15:19 +0000 loveisstrange 1868550@https://boards.hellobee.com/ No. C is so much physically bigger than many kids her age that Id never want her to be held back. Maysprout on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868491 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:50:39 +0000 Maysprout 1868491@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @ChiCalGoBee: So boys that can read at 4/young 5 should still wait to start kindergarten? I kinda feel like maybe the classroom should change if it's a matter of boys being too immature for school, boys aren't behind intellectually. I just remember being super bored in kindergarten with the reading materials, I can't imagine if my parents had waited an extra year. sarac on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868482 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:48:39 +0000 sarac 1868482@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My daughter is 12 days past the cutoff, but I won't let her be held back a year just because of it. Red shirting would be a terrible choice for her. I totally support it when developmentally appropriate, though. Maysprout on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868470 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:42:28 +0000 Maysprout 1868470@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I was just talking to a parent today about this. Apparently it's a big thing in the school district that we just moved to. It sounds like here no one wants their child to be the youngest so it's just this peer pressure that keeps older and older kids held back just so they're not the youngest. I understand it, everyone wants their kid to be a leader and not lost to those kids that have had an extra year. But from the kids on the preschool playground I saw there's no reason other than no one wants their kid to be on the younger end - and for our kids that's not a good enough reason. If they were struggling than of course we'd consider it. My husband moved back to the states in elementary school and they put him with his age group rather than in next grade up, which he'd been in before the move. He just turned into a trouble maker because he was so bored. I guess I'm also happy it wasn't popular when I was younger. I didn't speak until I was 2 and I feel like here that would mean most parents would have already decided just to start them late to preschool since they were behind. ChiCalGoBee on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868440 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:23:03 +0000 ChiCalGoBee 1868440@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Mrs. Bee: Yep-although the cut-off is earlier in my state (Sept/Oct rather than 12/31). I did my Master's Thesis research on age of entry at kindergarten, and was fortunate to interview a lot of experts in the field. The consensus seems to be that they should be 5 by the time they have their first day of kinder. For boys (who tend to be more immature than girls socially/emotionally), I'd definitely not start them until 5-about to turn 6. My boy will be born in November, and he will be one of the oldest upon entering kindergarten. I just had my birthday this week and I was one of the youngest in my grade. My mom and I definitely think I would have done so much better socially/emotionally had I had an extra year at home. It definitely depends on the kid, though! autumnlove on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868416 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:14:21 +0000 autumnlove 1868416@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Only if it was recommended by her Dr or other experts. LuLu Mom on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868410 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:12:52 +0000 LuLu Mom 1868410@https://boards.hellobee.com/ when LO was born our states cut off was Oct 15th her birthday is the 1st, and we were very much considering redshirting her so she wasn't the youngest. But they recently switched the cutoff to July 15th, so it's a non-issue, she will be held back now based on the new cutoff dates. mrswin on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868384 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:05:08 +0000 mrswin 1868384@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @oliviaoblivia: Check with the schools you would be considering because I know my mom was able to do this with my younger sister and a cousin of mine did it with her daughter as well. Their birthdays were so close to the cut off but they were allowed to start "early". Mrs. Sketchbook on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868372 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:00:04 +0000 Mrs. Sketchbook 1868372@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My brother (born in June) was held back in the second grade and he barely understood it at the time, but it played havoc on him in middle school and high school when he started developing (lower voice, taller, facial hair) earlier than other kids, etc. I do believe it had a real effect on his self esteem. I don't know how far behind he was when he was held back (I was 17 as had my own issues), so I don't question my parents' choice, but seeing his experience does make me wonder how I would approach this issue myself. I'm not sure it is something I would do voluntarily. Mrs. High Heels on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868341 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 12:45:26 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 1868341@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think it's a case by case basis depending on each child, but I would rather have my children be the youngest and challenged than the other way around. If they were within the range of normal (physically, mentally, emotionally) for their age... I wouldn't. Mama Bird on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868309 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 12:37:37 +0000 Mama Bird 1868309@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I'm considering it. I started school a year early and it was great and I still felt the benefits in college, when I decided to take a year off and still graduated with other kids my age. But... DS is almost two and barely talking. I'm not sure when he'll catch up, so maybe an extra year is what he needs. BoogieBea on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868245 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 12:20:55 +0000 BoogieBea 1868245@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We could have redshirted him this year. We defaulted the decision to his teacher at the time. She told us he was ready. She had recommended a good friend of his from last year to repeat so she definitely is not opposed to the idea. So far I think he's been enjoying kindergarten and has been adjusting well. And he has matured quite a bit since last year so we hope we made the right decision. skipra on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you/page/2#post-1868155 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 11:51:14 +0000 skipra 1868155@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Cut off here is Sept 1 and DS1 has a Sept bday so he will already be one of the oldest. So definitely not for him. DS2 is a May baby so I think that should be fine too. I would really only consider it for a late summer birthday or if one of them needed extra time and it was suggested by their doctor or preschool teacher, etc. My Only Sunshine on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you#post-1868144 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 11:48:40 +0000 My Only Sunshine 1868144@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @oliviaoblivia: We're in the same boat. We're 2 weeks past the cutoff, so she'll be almost 6 when she starts kindergarten. She's still a toddler right now but with the start of the school year this has been on my mind a little. We either keep her where she is and she's one of the oldest or we apply to have her start early and she's the youngest. I think we'll probably leave her where she is under the theory that the cutoff has to be somewhere, and some kid is always going to be the oldest, but we have a few years before we actually have to decide. hilsy85 on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you#post-1868131 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 11:40:16 +0000 hilsy85 1868131@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I wasn't held back (Dec 31st birthday) and was always the youngest in the grade. LO has an Oct birthday, but here in NYC that just means that he'll be somewhere in the middle-ish, not necessarily the youngest. Depending on how he does in pre school, I would consider keeping him in private pre-k for an extra year and starting him when he's 5, almost 6 years old. jedeve on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you#post-1867926 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 10:36:58 +0000 jedeve 1867926@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I feel like red shirting is trendy since everyone read Outliers, but I think it just depends on the kid. I had an August birthday and wasn't held back, so I was one of the youngest in my class. I was already bored for most of school and wished I could skip a grade. Being behind a year would've been hell. DH thought maybe we should hold LO2 back since he didn't want the boys one year apart in school. Since he was born a month early, I think his birthday would be to far from the cutoff. But I think we will just see. If he is advanced or on par, I wouldn't want to hold him back. lawbee11 on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you#post-1867784 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 10:03:09 +0000 lawbee11 1867784@https://boards.hellobee.com/ No. LO was born 8/3 and the cutoff is 9/1. We're planning to have her start when she's 5, so she'll be one of the youngest in her class. The differences may be more apparent in Kindergarten, but I think it eventually all evens out. mrsjyw on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you#post-1867781 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 10:00:44 +0000 mrsjyw 1867781@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I would not. I was "red-shirted" being an immigrant from Korea and I always hated being one of the bigger, older, etc. kids socially. Academically I was bored, school didn't challenge me until late in HS. I def think that it's a case-by-case situation, DS is a Nov baby. Physically he's a lot bigger than most kids his age and even older kids. The cut off here is Sept 1 for the year he is Prek and Kindergarten. We can request that he be put in since his bday is before Dec 31. We'll most likely do that unless DS doesn't seem ready. youboots on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you#post-1867769 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 09:57:34 +0000 youboots 1867769@https://boards.hellobee.com/ This may sound dramatic, but my Dad was born in September and he has always said that he wished his parents had held him back a year. He was small for his age and badly bullied (it was the 50's) he is now 66 and still talks about it occasionally. For this reason my nephew born in August is being held back by my sister for a year. It totally works for them and I would do it if it made sense for my child, but our babe will be born in March so there is nothing to discuss for us. NovBaby1112 on "If you could redshirt, would you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-could-redshirt-would-you#post-1867759 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 09:55:28 +0000 NovBaby1112 1867759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @oliviaoblivia: this is exactly how I feel about my LO! I actually would love for her to be able to start kindergarten at almost 5 years instead of almost 6 years. The cut off for our town i *think* is Aug 31, and LO is born in Nov, so we don't even have a chance at it :sad: