https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 13 Apr 2026 06:14:51 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/3#post-2539677 Tue, 03 May 2016 11:16:03 +0000 Truth Bombs 2539677@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would have no desire to bring a suit against my company based on compensation. I see no good end result from that. You seem quite confident in your abilities and skills, so why not go out in to the market and find an employer who will pay you what you believe you are worth? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539659 Tue, 03 May 2016 11:00:19 +0000 erinpye 2539659@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You just cannot know a person's financial details based upon assumption. You have no idea if their family bought their house, if they live in debt, etc. I'd definitely ask for what you deserve salary-wise, but keep your coworker's perceived situation separate: don't let your assumptions become "truths" to make you angry. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539364 Mon, 02 May 2016 21:55:24 +0000 oldsoulmama 2539364@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm willing to bet her family paid for the house and private school for the kids. I wouldn't be surprised if he is earning more than you (especially if you are in a male-dominated field), but I have a hard time believing the difference in salary explains the difference in assets.</p> <p>Having said that, I'd still consult a headhunter to find out if you're within the range of where you should be. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539189 Mon, 02 May 2016 17:24:06 +0000 Eko 2539189@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just commenting on the job portion....</p> <p>If you haven't gotten a bonus in two years and have raised the issue before with no result a good way of knowing whether it's fair pay is to find a new job :happy:<br /> ..Seems like a better way to go then speaking to an attorney. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539123 Mon, 02 May 2016 15:41:08 +0000 Paddington10 2539123@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would be curious too! I might cheekily ask him!! HA! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539122 Mon, 02 May 2016 15:40:53 +0000 Mrsbells 2539122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Modern Daisy: Some people live way outside their means too and have a lot of debt. You cant always tell how much someone is getting paid by their expenses </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539119 Mon, 02 May 2016 15:39:34 +0000 mrsjd 2539119@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I keep going back to the fact that based on the living situation you've described and your lack of belief in family money, he would have to be making 2x or more than you. Do you really think your employer could 1) afford to pay him that much more, or 2) hide the fact that he did if they did pay him that much more. I feel like you must have other reasons for feeling that you're being paid unfairly. </p> <p>You could get an attorney involved, but I feel like any decent lawyer is going to tell you that, right now, you have no claim. Full disclosure, I am a lawyer. I'm not even sure you have any right or ability to compel information from your employer about other's salaries. Obviously, they have an obligation to pay you fairly. Do more additional digging and try to find out if you're being paid fairly. Ask the secretaries/assistants, those betches know everything (only sort of joking).</p> <p>ETA: I also think in this day and age, employers are more willing to be transparent about salary information. Especially honest employers. They don't want to open themselves up to litigation risks. They're generally pretty conservative about trying to avoid those lawsuits. So, even if you can't get exact numbers, ask for a range of salaries in your level and experience as well as factors considering in setting salary, raises, bonuses, etc. If your reviews/history reflect that you're being paid on the low end, then I'd get upset. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539115 Mon, 02 May 2016 15:34:01 +0000 sunny 2539115@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Modern Daisy: I read up thread that you said your occupation is quite niche. Would you "ruin" your reputation by involving an attorney? I know my field is pretty tight knit and I think that would be a CLM for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539090 Mon, 02 May 2016 15:12:35 +0000 catlady 2539090@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I will be honest, I don't think that getting an attorney involved is a good way to move this forward. </p> <p>I don't know if anyone has mentioned this, but the best way to get a raise is to get another job offer with a higher salary and try to get your job to match or beat it. You need to be prepared to actually take the other job though if it doesn't work out. But that is the usual way of getting a big salary bump. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539088 Mon, 02 May 2016 15:08:34 +0000 Modern Daisy 2539088@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sunny: yes, I completely agree with this but sometimes women especially tend to be underpaid compared to men for no reason other than gender. Who knows, maybe our boss factors in the fact that he is the sole breadwinner to the equation when deciding who deserves what. I would personally never mention him specifically or anything about my coworkers spending habits, but I would want to know what the men make compared to me for doing the same job. The question is how much info will they actually provide if I don't get an attorney involved? I'm thinking not much, but I could be totally wrong. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2539059 Mon, 02 May 2016 14:44:42 +0000 sunny 2539059@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Modern Daisy: The advice I've always been given is to advocate for yourself based on your own merits. Many years ago, I found out that a coworker got a promotion and I didn't. We were both new grads and salaries were standardized at that level. I thought that the work I did should have merited a promo as well, but the advice I was given from my mentor was that comparing myself to my coworker would be pointless (and make me look juvenile) and I should just advocate based on what I did. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538988 Mon, 02 May 2016 13:41:14 +0000 PinkElephant 2538988@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Modern Daisy: Ugh, that's frustrating :( No one likes to feel like they're being cheated or used as an employee.</p> <p>Definitely worth bringing YOUR compensation up with HR/your boss - you're getting lots of good advice here on a variety of ways to do it here, without really drawing your coworker into it. I really hope it works out for you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538986 Mon, 02 May 2016 13:38:28 +0000 SweetiePie 2538986@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Modern Daisy: I think it never hurts to advocate for yourself if you think you are underpaid.<br /> But I really don't think your coworkers spending should be a data point. Spending just isn't a good indicator these days. My husband makes a very good living. We have a friend who also does ok but makes less than half what my husband makes (this is a fact). And their expenses definitely exceed ours. They are just more flamboyant about their purchases, get family help, and are ok with being in debt and not saving much. Outside looking in someone would probably think they make more, but I know for a fact they don't.<br /> I totally see why it raises an eyebrow, but I don't necessarily think it indicates anything regarding his income vs yours. It sounds like he'd have to make at least twice what you do, if that was the case. And that's really hard to fathom for any peer/coworker situation. But you know your work environment best - is that possible? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538975 Mon, 02 May 2016 13:28:09 +0000 Modern Daisy 2538975@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PinkElephant: that's a good theory but not the case. He was actually hired around the same time I was with LESS experience and making less $. I only know this because he was previously in a different field and shared what the "cap" on salary was in that field. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538974 Mon, 02 May 2016 13:26:18 +0000 Modern Daisy 2538974@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Banana330: wow that is amazing!! Congrats on getting that accomplished! I have never heard of doing a salary review before, but it makes sense now that you explained it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538893 Mon, 02 May 2016 12:29:19 +0000 katbridg 2538893@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't know how big your company is, but you could try checking on Glassdoor to see if your position has comparable salaries posted. I've used that to see if I'm in the same pay range as co-workers. In my experience, it's been pretty accurate. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538853 Mon, 02 May 2016 12:03:18 +0000 PinkElephant 2538853@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I won't comment on the house issue, since my viewpoint has already been echoed by so many other people....</p> <p>But as far as the salary of your coworker, here's one other thought on why he could make a lot more than you that doesn't have anything to do with you/your performance. Is it possible that at the time he started, he needed to be "bought"? Ie., lured away from another role at another firm? In my field (finance), this is a totally common thing. If at a certain point, Firm A really need employees who are experienced and highly skilled at doing "x", they might be willing to match and exceed these employees' current salaries at Firm B. It's not the nicest move on the firm's part with regard to their loyal employees (who are probably still being compensated at the "typical" rate for their position/experience, but it happens more than you'd imagine. So your company may be telling you the truth that no one is getting raises, but not everyone necessarily started at the same level (as unfair as that may be). </p> <p>In this case, you're well within your rights to ask HR for certain information related to your own compensation. Perhaps you can frame it as wanting to know where you fall percentage-wise in your level at your company. Are you in the top 10%? The bottom 10%? somewhere in between? They should be able to give you a sense of where you stand without revealing anything personal about anyone else, even if that means aggregating data over several departments, or a few different levels, in order to provide privacy for everyone. If you're way below where you feel you should be, ask what can be done (by you and by them) to get your pay to a more median level, at least. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538829 Mon, 02 May 2016 11:38:51 +0000 ocean81 2538829@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think you can guess what someone makes on how expensive their house is, what clothes they wear, etc, etc... Besides the fact that it's none of your business (not trying to be rude), you have no idea if they are in CC debt, if they invest in the stock market well, have family money, you get the idea... That being said, if you think you aren't being paid fairly then definitely talk to your boss, but I wouldn't mention anyone else in your conversation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538807 Mon, 02 May 2016 11:13:10 +0000 PawPrints 2538807@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely push for a major raise. Salary equality is a huge issue and you have every right to be upset if you have been denied a raise for so long. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538792 Mon, 02 May 2016 11:04:31 +0000 catlady 2538792@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you are close to your co-worker, you could also consider asking him directly if he'd share his salary with you. The worst he can say is no. I know this seems to be taboo in most workplaces but it really shouldn't be, especially if you are in the exact same position. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538771 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:51:04 +0000 Banana330 2538771@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have asked for a salary review with other people in the company who do the same job as me and have the same title. I suggested I was being underpaid as a woman (the other person with the same job title was a man). The company reviewed and I was offered a huge jump in salary. Turns out for years I was underpaid. It's worth discussing with the company. I knew I was getting paid less as charge out rates for us were different and they were open among staff (although we were told they don't directly correspond to salary...) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538761 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:42:43 +0000 JenGirl 2538761@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would drop it about the coworkers house. There are so many more factors that come into play for a house/car/school/lifestyle/etc. No reason to worry about their finances.</p> <p>However, I think it is perfectly understandable to want to have a discussion with your manager about your salary. My work provides me with actually numbers about salary in my position. I know that I get average and I think I get top 5%. Maybe high and low. Something like that. I would ask your manager for some real numbers for salaries in your position. That should be pretty easy for them to do. And ask for a raise. Directly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538754 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:34:43 +0000 LatteLove 2538754@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This situation sounds very similar to one with a former coworker of mine. We didn't have equivalent positions, but I knew the cap on his salary and it isn't that high, and yet he lived in a multi-million dollar house because his wife's family was very wealthy and bought it for them. (that was gossip/anecdotal, but made sense considering his salary) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538753 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:34:11 +0000 Modern Daisy 2538753@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@winniebee: I am definitely thinking I will be asking for more information this year at comp season. My company is annoyingly private about these things but I think just the action of asking gets the wheels turning in general and might send a message that I'm starting to get unhappy/suspicious. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538744 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:27:49 +0000 lamariniere 2538744@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>From what you've said, it really sounds like they have a lot of family money/help. </p> <p>It doesn't hurt to ask for a raise though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538741 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:25:43 +0000 winniebee 2538741@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No....I mean....he could have had a grandparent pass away and leave him money. Unless you had specific information that he made more money than you, I don't think its anything to get upset about.</p> <p>But, like you mention, being cognizant of whether your employer is compensating you appropriately is certainly fair game. Is there a way to have a salary review without bringing this other employee into the equation? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538731 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:17:58 +0000 Modern Daisy 2538731@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Happygal: maybe you are right but easier said than done clearly! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538713 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:10:23 +0000 Happygal 2538713@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Modern Daisy: I think everyone is clear about that part. But I'm seeing people over and over say that it shouldn't be the thing that tips you over the edge in your suspicions....it shouldn't even play into your suspicions. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538706 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:04:18 +0000 mrswilson2012 2538706@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope, I wouldn't be upset. Maybe he received an inheritance? Maybe he has a side job? Maybe he charges everything to credit cards? Maybe he has another family member help out financially? There really are too many variables. Now if the issue is that you think you are being paid unfairly, I would talk to your boss about your compensation or find a new higher paying job. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-found-out-coworkers-house-cost-2x-yours/page/2#post-2538705 Mon, 02 May 2016 10:02:48 +0000 Modern Daisy 2538705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Madison43: you hit the nail on the head exactly. This was just enough info to make me raise my eyebrows and wonder if my employer has been truthful. All salary info is kept private so there is no way for me to know, which is why outside factors like this even get my attention. </p>