https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 19 Apr 2026 15:28:31 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2688320 Fri, 27 Jan 2017 19:21:37 +0000 gingerbebe 2688320@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have 2 boys 20 months apart. I am glad I found out both times. For some odd reason, I was SURE DS1 was a girl and was shocked when they told me it was a boy at my anatomy scan. Then I got pregnant with DS2 and that pregnancy was so different I was sure THIS time it was going to be a girl. Nope. I was a little sad it was another boy (even though its honestly so awesome to have 2 boys - its so easy and awesome just to recycle all the gear and the boys love each other SO SO much), but I was over it in a day and moved on. </p> <p>However, I would feel awful if the one day I was sad was the first day of DS' life, instead of a random day in the middle of my pregnancy. With postpartum hormones raging, I would probably feel really sad and then feel like an awful mother for feeling sad and then it would just be a hot mess for no reason. But that's just me. </p> <p>We *might* have a third child (we haven't decided if we want to go bio or adopt), but if we end up pregnant again, I think we will find out the sex to avoid that issue. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2688318 Fri, 27 Jan 2017 19:14:20 +0000 Coral 2688318@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@AnnabelleG: That's a wonderful perspective to have. Thank you for sharing. It's possible to be overwhelmingly happy but also slightly mourn never having a daughter. Thank you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2688308 Fri, 27 Jan 2017 18:58:40 +0000 daniellemybelle 2688308@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a friend who was Team Green for #2 and was also hoping for a girl. She swears that she wasn't disappointed because it was just so exciting to meet her LO and that the surprise was really fun.</p> <p>I could never be TG but I haven't heard of anyone that regrets it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2688273 Fri, 27 Jan 2017 18:05:57 +0000 AnnabelleG 2688273@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think this probably varies a lot from person to person... I think if you can find ways to resolve possible disappointment prior to having Baby, then waiting to find out is super fun. We had a boy the first time (found out ahead of time) and wanted to wait to find out with #2. The biggest thing that helped me let go of disappointment was knowing that any disappointment or sadness didn't in mean I love my sons less. I could be thrilled and grateful to have 2 boys and also feel a little sadness about the possibility of not having a daughter. Once I let myself feel that way and not feel guilty, the sadness went away and I got really excited about my older son have a brother. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2688244 Fri, 27 Jan 2017 17:22:55 +0000 Mrs. Toad 2688244@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: @Coral: Thank you both. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2688241 Fri, 27 Jan 2017 17:21:53 +0000 Mrs. Toad 2688241@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, I still enjoyed it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2688108 Fri, 27 Jan 2017 14:20:12 +0000 Coral 2688108@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Toad: Congratulations!!! Thank you for coming back and sharing. Are you still glad you were team green? Once again, congratulations on your little sweetheart! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2688073 Fri, 27 Jan 2017 13:10:30 +0000 bubblegum 2688073@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Toad: Congrats on your baby girl!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2688047 Fri, 27 Jan 2017 12:22:06 +0000 Mrs. Toad 2688047@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Baby girl was born this morning. Although I had hoped for a boy, I love my little girl. Minor disappointment, but only for a few minutes. I was over it by the time she was put in my arms. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2687656 Thu, 26 Jan 2017 19:24:55 +0000 Iced Tea 2687656@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I see some are mentioning difficulty connecting with a baby of unknown gender. To address connecting, I nicknamed the baby (something neutral). We call the baby Sprout. I do feel like I relate to the baby more personally after starting to use a nickname. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686856 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 21:00:59 +0000 LomaLinda 2686856@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was team green with my first since we didn't have a preference. It was such a fun experience to find out when the baby was born!!! Our first is a boy, so when I got pregnant with my second I immediately knew I was hoping for a girl. So we decided to find out, so I could stop hoping for a girl and prepare my mind for boy if that was the case. Second baby ended up being a girl - I was so shocked!! It was fun to know it was a girl, so I could spend the second half of my pregnancy buying fun girly stuff for the baby!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686748 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 17:48:28 +0000 Mommy Finger 2686748@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wasn't team green for either. I had a boy and was so sure that #2 was going to be a girl since my pregnancy was so different the 2nd time around. So I was surprised that it was another boy. And for about a day, I was disappointed as I had already started thinking about what it would be like to have one of each. I was able to get over it really fast and realize all of the awesomeness it is to have 2 boys. However, I don't know what it would have been like if I had gone the full 40 weeks convinced that it was a girl and I was wrong. I would have been upset with myself for being upset. </p> <p>But every person is different. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686741 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 17:37:46 +0000 Mrs. Toad 2686741@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coral: No problem, I will have a baby by this time next week. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686635 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 15:57:47 +0000 lilyann 2686635@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have not experienced gender disappointment but more or less sad I might not ever get to have a daughter, if that makes sense. I am fully obsessed with my 2 boys and we are team green with this one (32 weeks), I will be happy either way! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686622 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 15:46:42 +0000 codeitall 2686622@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was team green with my first, but pretty convinced it was a boy (and tbh I really wanted a boy). Lucky me, it was a boy!</p> <p>We're team green again on this one and I'm actually having a hard time connecting because I'm trying to feel ambivalent so I'm not disappointed at delivery.</p> <p>If I'd had a girl first, I know I would have been disappointed after anticipating and wanting a boy, but in trying to not be disappointed this time, I feel like I'm not as excited about this baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686534 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 14:39:34 +0000 Boogs 2686534@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Welcome! I wasn't team green, but I also didn't experience gender disappointment because I got the boys that I wanted. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686520 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 14:26:53 +0000 Mrs. Cheesecake 2686520@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We were team green for both kids - LO1 is a boy and LO2 is a girl. I was scared of gender disappointment with LO1 because I really wanted a boy. But ironically when DS was born I didn't even hear them announce that he was a boy when he was born; I was already in love with the baby in my arms and I didn't care whether it was a boy or a girl. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686490 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 14:01:38 +0000 babypugs 2686490@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coral: Actually had a girl (yay!) but was able to stop stressing over it! I would have been anxious the remaining 20 weeks if I hadn't found out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686485 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 13:58:27 +0000 Coral 2686485@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mamainthesun: Don't apologize...it's all so fresh! @bubblegum: If we were having three, I would totally do that.<br /> @babypugs: So, are you having a boy this time around? @Mrs. Toad: I hope you will report back!<br /> @ShootingStar: I'm almost wondering if it's one of those "better to be safe than sorry" sort of things. I could be totally cool with it...or not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686481 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 13:54:59 +0000 Coral 2686481@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JCCovi: Ugh...I know you are also right! It could totally go both ways! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686475 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 13:50:23 +0000 babypugs 2686475@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was team green for LO1 because I didn't have a preference (although I was sure it was a boy... nope!). This time around, I really wanted another girl and knew I'd be disappointed for a bit if it wasn't, so I went ahead and found out. I'm glad I did! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686339 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 11:17:56 +0000 bubblegum 2686339@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mamainthesun: hahaha everyone says that! I honestly was shocked when I finally heard them say girl! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686333 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 11:09:04 +0000 mamainthesun 2686333@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bubblegum: I'm so jealous :silly: :happy: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686332 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 11:08:56 +0000 JCCovi 2686332@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've always been told that if you're invested in a certain sex you should find out early to get your disappointment out of the way. You'll find it harder to forgive yourself if you cry from disappointment with your new baby in your arms. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686230 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 09:23:36 +0000 bubblegum 2686230@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Currently pregnant with baby number 2 and found out the gender. DH and I agreed to never be team green unless we already had one of each. Because much like you although I LOVE being a boy mama I did want at least one girl. I was blessed enough to have had my boy and now I'm pregnant with my girl. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686174 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 08:29:25 +0000 mamainthesun 2686174@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We found out on Monday that our second baby will be another boy. I am sad to say that I was extremely disappointed at not having a girl. I cried a few times that evening.<br /> That said now, only two days later I'm super excited !! I hope my boys will be super close and have an as great relationship as my sister and me.<br /> I did spend the first trimester dreaming of the baby being a girl, my symptoms were completely different and a lot of people said they thought I was having a girl. Plus I spent some time looking at different theories to try and determine the sex based on the early u/s. I really thought it would be girl based on all this.<br /> So all in all I'm happy that I know we're expecting another little boy so I don't continue dreaming about a girl. And because I can start picturing our life as it will be! My son is the best thing that has happened to me and I can only imagine how great it will be to have another little boy !<br /> Sorry for writing a novel, it's just so recent!<br /> If we ever go for a third I don't know if I would be team green ! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686157 Wed, 25 Jan 2017 07:47:23 +0000 ShootingStar 2686157@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think everyone handles things differently. With my first I was really hoping for a girl and it was actually kind of a shock to find out it was a boy. I cried when I found out and then I cried more because I was disappointed in myself for being upset. It took a few days but then I got used to the idea of a boy and got excited about it. </p> <p>There's no way I'd want to mar the amazingness of meeting my child for the fist time with feelings of gender disappointment. When I did meet DS it was one of the best moments of my life. </p> <p>It also would've made me incredibly anxious throughout pregnancy, wondering the gender. But many people enjoy wondering and anticipating. I'm just not one of them :silly: . </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686102 Tue, 24 Jan 2017 22:18:56 +0000 Mrs. Toad 2686102@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm team green with my second and will be slightly disappointed with a girl and my first is also a boy. However, when I find out (any day now), I don't think I will be disappointed if it is a girl. I am just going to love our new baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686097 Tue, 24 Jan 2017 22:06:44 +0000 Coral 2686097@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Iced Tea: That's a great point. My first labor was 32 hours...let's hope the next one is shorter. :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-had-gender-disappointment-1#post-2686096 Tue, 24 Jan 2017 22:05:33 +0000 Coral 2686096@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@skipra: Oh gosh. Even if someone where thinking that...why ask? Even while you are still pregnant! Thanks for sharing your experience!<br /> @reverie: Hahahaha...that's so true! I would not be disappointed to have another boy but just to never have a girl. You know? But you are so right. Once they were in my arms I am sure it would be very different vs an ultrasound where you still have time to mull etc.<br /> @AprilFool: That's a great point! I am sure I will love my child no matter what. </p>