https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 23 Apr 2026 06:03:18 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606649 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 16:54:09 +0000 Alivoo01 606649@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jacks: My dad thought it would be too stressful for me and since it's many years of school, he was afraid I'd never marry or marry to "old", etc. Sigh. I still fantasize the what ifs, but the hubby always reminds me, it's the current path that I'm on that enabled for us to meet! Well if you put it that a way hun... haha! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606581 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 16:24:42 +0000 LC 606581@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have what many would consider to be a "useless" degree, a Bachelor of Fine Arts in graphic design. I have a great, well paying job in the industry, and there's room for more growth. </p> <p>My sister also has a BFA, though in photography. Immediately after graduation she went to grad school for nursing and is now a RN. She realized in the middle of her junior year that a degree wasn't necessary for photography but at that point she'd have to start over so she should just finish the degree she started. </p> <p>Our parents never pushed us one way or the other, they encouraged us to pursue what we love, and we appreciate that. They footed the bill for about 75% of our undergrad, and anything beyond that (my sister's grad school) had to be paid for on our own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606536 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 16:09:45 +0000 regberadaisy 606536@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think our plan is to give each kid X dollars for education. If they choose not to use it for college then it must be something that's towards a career. ie vocational school or training of some sorts. But I won't give it to them to jet around Europe although I do believe that IS a life enhancing experience.</p> <p>But I agree with you, they should be free to choose their degree.</p> <p>P.S. Don't even get me started on the insane number of asian kids that are "expected" to go to premed bc it's what's expected of them. I will never do that to my child. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606534 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 16:09:44 +0000 blackbird 606534@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Basically, in the words of my husband, "she can't major in basketweaving on our dime". </p> <p>I have a lot of coworkers whose children graduated with degrees in music, art, etc, and are still living at home, unemployed. I just want our kids to know that they need to use college to get their ass out of the house, get a career, do something. You can double major in something softer, or take those classes for electives. But you don't get to go for four years on partially our dime, then come home and lament that nobody will employ you. I want her to have some foresight. OK so you want an English degree. What do you think you'll do with it in 4 years? Just...have a plan. It'll be a big discussion in our house.</p> <p>Basically, I want my kids to be able to support themselves, 100%. Not rely on others. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606494 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:56:35 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 606494@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Alivoo01: that's too bad! It is such a fun career. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606491 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:55:54 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 606491@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My degree wasn't necessarily useful, it was what I did with it that was useful. So I'd be very open minded on the type of degree. We are encouraging the STEM careers though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606470 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:48:41 +0000 Alivoo01 606470@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Well said!!!</p> <p>My dad had a direct hand in deciding all classes I took starting in HS, and I hated it!! Am I happy where I'm at now, sure! But I don't like that I resented him for "picking my path of life". I wanted to be a pediatrician and that go knocked down so fast! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606443 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:40:57 +0000 heartonastring 606443@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I work in higher ed in a capacity that has me working very closely with undergraduate students and, based on my experience, I would answer with a very emphatic and resounding, "NO!"</p> <p>To be successful, one has to enjoy what one is doing, and that pretty much always involves playing to one's strengths. I see countless students who are miserable and/or failing because they are only enrolled in their program because their parents told them they had to be. </p> <p>I also think there is a HUGE discussion to be had (but I don't necessarily want to have it here, as I seem to have it with students and parents on a daily basis) regarding degrees being "useful." I am, quite frankly, sick of hearing that some degrees are useful while others are not. Degrees in and of themselves are not vocational nor were they ever meant to be. However, it is up to each individual student to use his/her degree in combination with volunteer/work experience, career services supports offered at every higher ed institution and self-promotion to find employment. I see liberal arts students doing this successfully on a weekly basis. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606437 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:39:58 +0000 Bookish 606437@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, because we don't plan on paying for a whole lot of it. If we were footing the entire bill, we'd probably strongly encourage a STEM field (which we might anyways lol) but if our LO ends up being an art major, so be it, as long as they are happy and pay for it themselves ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606422 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:37:04 +0000 lomom 606422@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm only helping pay for a degree that will lead to a well-paying job. I'm not paying for a general studies degree. Accounting, engineering, etc. yes I would pay for. </p> <p>LO can feel free to pursue student loans for a general studies degree if that's what he wants. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606388 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:29:46 +0000 twinmama 606388@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They can choose for themselves, but we'll only be assisting financially, not paying their way. If we were, I might want more influence. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606383 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:28:54 +0000 Mrs Hedgehog 606383@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>our LO's will be allowed to choose for themselves. I want them to study what they are passionate about. Why would I want to force them to study something they don't care about or like so they can hopefully get a job in a career they hate? I was about to study Theatre but switched to Criminal Justice last minute. My parents supported both decisions whole heartily. Infact, my little sister is a Photography major and they couldn't be more excited that she is following her passion. That is what I want for my kids too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606311 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:12:13 +0000 littlek 606311@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>He can choose for himself, but we will probably have discussions with him about what he wants to do with his life and what is the best way to go about that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606306 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:11:01 +0000 DillonLion 606306@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They can choose for themselves whether we pay or not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606289 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:06:57 +0000 Mrs. Stroller 606289@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I doubt it! If he's as strong-willed as his parents, it's not likely we'll have a say :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606283 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 15:05:33 +0000 littlebittyhouse 606283@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How ever he's sees fit. To me a degree is a degree.</p> <p>I am going to have to ask DH what he thinks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606257 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:58:54 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 606257@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom foot the entire bill for college and had a say to some degree in my major. I was able to use my electives to take classes that peaked my interest.</p> <p>I think it should be a collaborative effort, with more weight given to what the student desires. Internships can be used for practical career planning. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606244 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:56:21 +0000 heffalump 606244@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is hard for me because my degree isn't very useful..... but I still will let her do what she wants. I'll encourage her to get something that will help her get a job, but in the end it's her choice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606238 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:54:45 +0000 winniebee 606238@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>He can choose for himself. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606232 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:53:21 +0000 aprk 606232@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This isn't meant to be a downer comment at all, but by the time our kids are college-aged, who knows what higher education will be like! I think it's important for the parents and kids to discuss options for degrees and the pros/cons, but pushing them to do something they don't want (that will take so long and cost so much!) seems like a recipe for disaster. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606230 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:52:45 +0000 yoursilverlining 606230@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, we won’t have a say in what she majors in. Not bashing your husband ;) but I personally hate the (pretty popular) idea of this division between “useful” and “not useful” degrees. I know lots of successful people (lawyers mostly, since that’s who I work with) who have “useless” undergrad degrees like history, English and philosophy. The skills they gained in those degree courses were pretty freaking “useful” afterall!! ;-o I know some degrees put you on a more specific career track than others; but I don’t want to shoehorn LO in to a specific career. I think people are generally more successful when they are doing what they love. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606229 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:50:02 +0000 Weagle 606229@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hope she (they) gets a useful degree, and we will have many discussions about that, but we won't make that decision for her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606225 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:48:51 +0000 Beebug 606225@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As someone who works in post-secondary and deals with first year students who come to me (and sometimes their parents, too) after being pushed/directed to take a certain program, my experience tells me this is the absolute worst thing one could do. Best of intentions yes, but the outcome is not usually pretty, nor is it any good for the kid/student.</p> <p>Regardless of what my LO and hopefully future LOs want to pursue for a career or education I am definitely going to do my best to be as supportive as possible, and definitely not dictate a certain direction. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606221 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:48:33 +0000 illumina 606221@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We both feel it would be worth it alone just for the experience of moving away from home and for the social side ;) So I wouldn't care what degree it was. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606209 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:47:08 +0000 Mrs.Someone 606209@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No. I am grateful that my parents supported me in going to college where I wanted to, and to get the degree I wanted. I plan to pass it on to any future children! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606208 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:46:56 +0000 MrsTiz 606208@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't really see it as the parents decision. I know that has a huge influence, but I don't think it should be forced.</p> <p>I agree, there are a lot of stupid degrees you can go for and ultimately waste 4 years and tens of thousands of dollars on..so encouragement would be nice, but no I don't think it is the parents final decision because they won't be the one working in that field :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606202 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:45:45 +0000 MamaMoose 606202@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm torn. My gut instinct is actually to agree with your hubs. Why should I pay for something I don't think is valuable. But then I feel guilty for feeling that way..... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-plan-on-sending-your-lo-to-college#post-606192 Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:43:55 +0000 mediagirl 606192@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do you have a say in what degree they get? </p> <p>We had this discussion the other day and my husband and I disagree on this. I believe she should be free to choose. He believe she needs to choose a "useful" degree.</p> <p>While I understand where he is coming from, I think he's not seeing the full picture. I have a Comm Arts degree and make a good living. He has an Accounting degree, doesn't use it, makes a good living but makes less than me. </p> <p>If my daughter wants to go to college and major in something he doesn't deem "useful", I say go for it. He says, no way. </p> <p>What do you say? (no bashing my husband) :) </p>