https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 07 Apr 2026 23:54:29 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2664004 Sun, 11 Dec 2016 22:04:02 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 2664004@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@shellio: Exactly -- we have 5 degrees between us, and both of us are the product of subpar public schools (a 3 and a 4 on Great Schools, the horror) and we paid our own way, though I certainly had a huge amount of financial aid that my own kids would never get. But yeah, I am totally on board with the notion that student and parent commitment are the biggest factor.</p> <p>That said, I do know public education has been buffeted by ever more pressure on teachers to meet benchmarks and that is a legit concern. And I wonder how that will trickle down to my son, who is among the youngest in his class. If he needs extra help, will he get it? I don't know. These first months of K were a bit of a wakeup call, and he has learned a ton, but I wasn't expecting the pressure I feel, either!</p> <p>FWIW the school you describe sounds a lot like the one we are considering. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2663962 Sun, 11 Dec 2016 17:22:48 +0000 shellio 2663962@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've been giving this a lot of thought lately. My kids are in preschool at a private school, but my oldest will start kindergarten next year and we are tossing around looking into public school. The only drawback of our school is the tuition. I also think about the other things we could do with the money, especially with 3 or possibly someday 4 kids. We are in a decent elementary school zone, not so hot for middle and high schools. </p> <p>I'm a product of not-great public schools (recently saw that one is rated 2 on greatschools, that's out of 10) and I have a professional degree, it can be done. I think my kids would luckily thrive in any environment because they have parents committed to their education as obviously all of yours do as well! :) </p> <p>That being said, we are at our current private school because it is a foreign language immersion school and it is really amazing to see our kids fluently speak and understand another language. They will add a third language in the elementary years. This was the big selling point to us. If we chose not to continue at our school, we would be going to public school and not another private school. </p> <p>Here are the other things I love about our school:<br /> -the community. We get along well with the other families. There is also a fair amount of diversity for a private school (which we would not encounter at our neighborhood public school) because of its cultural immersion aspect.<br /> -small class size<br /> -almost no fund raising (no selling wrapping paper as I remember dreading, etc)<br /> -all of my kids will be in the same school for a long time because it goes from age 3 to 8th grade<br /> -minimal standardized testing<br /> -exposure to and emphasis on other cultures and a broader world view<br /> -lots of clubs and activities offered on-site, maybe not the same type of extra curricular organized sports as my friends' schools sometimes sponsor but we are not interested in those yet. My kids have been doing yoga, gymnastics, STEAM, and flamenco, all as low key after-school clubs that they have fun with and don't require extra shuttling around. </p> <p>FWIW, a girlfriend that has her kids at the same school has decided to prioritize tuition (and debt repayment) over college funds for now, and hopes to help her kids out in the future but also feels strongly about the education at this school. I had zero college financing help from my parents and somehow I survived. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2663556 Fri, 09 Dec 2016 14:57:46 +0000 psw27 2663556@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our public schools are not great. There are certain "tier one" schools that I would consider for LO but if he doesn't get in via lottery, he will have to go to private school. He is also showing us that he's the type of kid who needs focused attention by his teachers, so I think a lower ratio would be beneficial for him. We already pay $$$ for daycare so it will feel like a continuation of that. </p> <p>*This is all caveat-ed on us staying in the "city" versus moving elsewhere/to the burbs </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2663529 Fri, 09 Dec 2016 14:20:55 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 2663529@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: Yep. I just struggle with DH's assumption that private will be automatically better. Are we paying for "peace of mind" -- i.e. sending our kids to private school means we care more? Or is it actually, quantitatively better? I have no doubt it can be for many -- but not sure. Then again, I never had the opportunity as a kid so I'm not sure if I'm inherently biased. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662730 Thu, 08 Dec 2016 09:50:35 +0000 looch 2662730@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Yoyo: I feel the same, I can't say for sure my son is thriving, but he's certainly not experiencing something adversarial, if that makes sense. He's learning how to read, he has friends, he doesn't get called to the principal's office for distracting behavior, etc. And who knows what will even happen next year, it could completely change, right? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662723 Thu, 08 Dec 2016 09:46:56 +0000 looch 2662723@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@honeybear: I can only answer for the state in which I reside, but magnet schools do get additional funding above and beyond the per student allocation and interdistrict magent schools receive additional funding per student from the state because of the mandate to accept at least 25% of students from outside the town where the school is. </p> <p>This particular school is an IB school, so yes, part of the cost of the trip is paid for by the taxpayers. The PTO and the parents are also responsible for fundraising as well. </p> <p>As an aside, the school is being built, brand new from scratch. The state set aside $77 million for the construction, furnishing and operational costs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662694 Thu, 08 Dec 2016 09:09:28 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 2662694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: That's what I'm grappling with. I don't know if it's the best use of our money, either. What does "thriving" for my kid look like? I'm not sure I really know yet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662681 Thu, 08 Dec 2016 08:36:11 +0000 ShootingStar 2662681@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@honeybear: Haha, no I was in a class of over 500. The trips to France were for kids taking French and they were part of a cool exchange program. We had sister schools in Paris and French students stayed with us for 10 days in October, then we stayed with them in April. It also helped keep costs down because we didn't have to pay for hotels. </p> <p>The Italy trip was with an honors world history class. Maybe 30 or so kids were eligible for that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662678 Thu, 08 Dec 2016 08:24:49 +0000 honeybear 2662678@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: Fascinating! Did everyone in your class go? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662667 Thu, 08 Dec 2016 07:44:39 +0000 ShootingStar 2662667@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@honeybear: There was a lot of international travel at my public school growing up. I went to France in 9th and 12th grade, my brother went to Italy in 10th. It's all parent funded though. </p> <p>We've tossed around the idea of private school. As long as it's comparable to the cost of daycare we could reasonably afford it. But idk if it's the best use of our money or if would be better used in a college fund and on family travel that could be educational and a bonding experience. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662660 Thu, 08 Dec 2016 07:14:03 +0000 honeybear 2662660@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: Wow, how does a public school, even a lottery/magnet school, manage to pay for trips abroad for its students? That's impressive! Does the school get that much more funding than a regular public school or do they not have some other typical expense that schools have (I don't know what that might be, but maybe a donated building?)? I've honestly never heard of international travel being part of a public school, but that's amazing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662485 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 14:46:38 +0000 looch 2662485@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have been reading along with interest, as my son is in public school, but with lots of the things that are available to private school kids...as per the posts above. I think it goes to show that not all public schools are the same in terms of programming and resources available. The public school that my son attends teaches foreign language from Kindergarten, begins field trips abroad in the middle years and follows an extremely rigorous program with tons of discipline. As an example, the playground was recently built and the kids have essential agreements that they must adhere to in order to use it. It's very disciplined and academically rigorous. I also believe because parents have to enter a lottery, they're more invested and participate a lot more than your typical public school. What you do have, that you don't have to the same degree in private school, is the economically disadvantaged population (which by definition is those that live in public housing, have eligibility for reduced/free lunch and do not speak English as a first language at home). I think this is what we're all talking about when we're talking about schools being good or not, right?</p> <p>I truly believe I have managed to get my son a private school education at a public school price. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662480 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 14:32:53 +0000 hilsy85 2662480@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it's really hard to NOT fall in love with a private school when you're comparing it to a public school. We aren't in a great area now, but could move to an area with a decent public school and a great reputation in the city. However, we are hoping to send DS to private (we find out in Feb if we are in). I just don't think you can compare the resources available to kids at the two--as warm and friendly and supportive as a public school might be, this private school has a private garden play area for pre k and K; the kids start a foreign language in K; they go on weekly trips to a local environmental center; the 8th grade takes a trip to a spanish speaking country (last year was Puerto Rico). In higher grades, you have things like dark rooms and 3D printers for kids to use. And there's no fear that things like that will be taken away if funding stops. I am a product of public school myself, and very supportive of it, but if we can afford it, I would feel guilty not doing it for DS. I will say, however, that it was important to us to pick a private school that does not have a pressure cooker mentality, and that is relatively diverse, both racially and SES (i.e. they give a good amount of financial aid). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662473 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 14:19:37 +0000 meganmp 2662473@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have very strong feelings about the direction of education in my area. I can't stand the focus on standardized testing. I feel it has had a very negative impact on teaching not only because teachers feel the need to make sure kids do well on the test, but because it affects a teacher's ability to adapt his or her lessons based on student need due to district pressures to align work with pacing guides. I say this all as a former public school teacher- I spent a decade trying to deal with this. Now I'm at a private school and I'll send my kids her because I've seen how kids in my 4th grade compare to the kids I had in 5th grade previously. It is a much better education, the opportunites for learning and growth are greater, and I get a discount. It's still pricy as hell, but we're going to try to do it as long as we can. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662420 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 13:02:05 +0000 mediagirl 2662420@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would consider it if we could make it work. My husband did private high school and he thrived in it. Private school offers so much. I think if your kid is one who would thrive in a rigid structure like a private school offers, then I'd be all for it. I think our daughter would excel in a private school because of the rules and discipline and consequences, which you won't see in public school. Parents have to be involved. I love the idea of private school. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662418 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 12:55:10 +0000 wrkbrk 2662418@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not really what you are asking, but we were open to public or private, and it ended up being dictated by where we found a house. So private school it is ... but we are only having one so it's doable. In fact, it's no more than our daycare. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662407 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 12:36:21 +0000 looch 2662407@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can't afford private school (not religious affiliated) where I live, it costs upwards of $35,000 a year.</p> <p>So my son attends public school. If it is discovered that he can not function in public school (this is a journey, I don't believe that just because he is fine in K means he'll be fine for the next 12 years), then we will reassess and if needed, we will explore an outplacement via the public school system, as is his right. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662398 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 12:18:12 +0000 gingerbebe 2662398@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I are products of excellent public school systems and our parents went to great lengths to live within the boundaries of those school districts for all of our siblings. So we understood the value of public education.</p> <p>However, it was a different story when it came time for us to buy a home. DH and I were living in an "excellent" school district as renters, but we found that the property values were WAY overblown for the actual value of the schools. It was more a status thing to be able to say you lived in that city. Starter homes in this town were $450-500K, and we're talking like 1400 sq. ft. fixer uppers built in the 60s that needed new HVACs and roofs and no updates to the kitchens and anything that came on the market in that price range were getting 15-20 bids with a bidding war that drove up the price considerably. A 20+ year old house with no upgrades in a slightly nicer neighborhood would list at $600K and go for about $700K. And while I'm sure the schools in the town were good, they just aren't as good as the schools we went to growing up because of the nature of public schooling these days. (I had PE, track teams, art classes, school band that loaned instruments to all the kids who couldn't afford them, full day summer school, regular field trips, weeklong camps - all in elementary school). </p> <p>When you looked at the schools and then compared them with the property values, the property taxes, etc. it just didn't add up. When we looked over at the next town over, which had average schools, the properties were MUCH nicer and newer and literally half the cost. We realized we could live in a much nicer house and pay cash to send our kids to private school for less than what it cost to live in this excellent school district. </p> <p>We're considering moving back to DH's Midwestern hometown where the public schools are absolute PALACES. But the property value issue is even more pronounced. You can buy a nice home in a top rated school district for $300K or you can buy the EXACT same house a block over in a "bad" school district for $150K, no joke. And then there is a HUGE disparity in property tax values to boot between school districts. So the choice of whether you prefer a public school or want to pay cash for private school is totally within reach for everyone, which is sorta cool. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662397 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 12:15:00 +0000 littlejoy 2662397@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our little one attends a small preschool now, with an incredible student to teacher ratio. My first thought is that I can't wait for public school because of the financial relief - but my child really thrives in this kind of environment. All of this to say, I used to be "public school all the way!!", but as I see my child and her unique ways of learning, I wouldn't rule out a private school if it truly fit her better. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662394 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 12:09:23 +0000 Truth Bombs 2662394@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents sent me to private school though we lived in an area with good public schools. They did so because I thrived with a lower student/teacher ratio. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662388 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 11:58:53 +0000 mrsjd 2662388@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Public schools are terrible where we live and private school is basically the only option. </p> <p>ETA: I would send my kids to public school if there was a good option. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662386 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 11:56:00 +0000 lamariniere 2662386@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our school-aged child goes to private school. The number one reason is langage of instruction, but it's also an excellent school. We are expats and don't speak the local language, so it would be difficult to follow. (Both LOs were/are in a local daycare and there is language barrier there, but we don't have to do homework or any sort of following up, so it's not so important for us). We also get an education subsidy from my DH's employer, so it's not much of a financial burden for us. Someday we will leave this country and our school has over 400 affiliates worldwide, so they will (hopefully) be able to integrate into a new school somewhat easily. If we lived in a place where we spoke the language, our kids would most likely go to public school. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-you-send-or-will-send-your-child-to-private-school#post-2662376 Wed, 07 Dec 2016 11:38:29 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 2662376@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Why? Ha. That's broad, but I'm particularly interested in hearing from people who have decided to go private despite living in relatively good public districts (if there are any out there).</p> <p>We are looking for a preschool for our younger DS and my husband has fallen in love with a private school that we toured. If we just send our younger son, we will actually be saving quite a bit (right now we have a part-time nanny and our older son is in public K). But DH has started chattering about how it would be so nice to send our older son (the school is PK-8) and have them in the same place. </p> <p>I will admit I liked the school, the family atmosphere, the low student-teacher ratio, the commitment to service, etc. But our older son is doing fine in the public K right by our house, and while I certainly dislike the break-neck emphasis on standards, standards, testing, testing, it's hard to fathom spending so much $$$$ on schooling that could instead go toward a college savings account. </p>