Hellobee Boards Topic: If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?

Hellobee Boards Topic: If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor? https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 17 Apr 2026 04:59:56 +0000 illumina on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor/page/2#post-1557871 Thu, 10 Apr 2014 04:56:44 +0000 illumina 1557871@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We didn't. First they knew was when we called them after LO arrived. SweetMamaM on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor/page/2#post-1557793 Thu, 10 Apr 2014 00:44:15 +0000 SweetMamaM 1557793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I know my aunt rang my dad and sister once we were at the hospital (my aunt was our support person)... I assume at some point DH rang his parents to say it was all systems go but I don't remember - I was pretty high on the gas LOL DigAPony on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor/page/2#post-1557774 Thu, 10 Apr 2014 00:00:07 +0000 DigAPony 1557774@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Mae: our families are both out of state. I called my parents after my water broke to let them know things had started but everything happened too fast to call my in-laws. We called them and my parents after baby had arrived--I had a very fast 3-hour labor. I think it's fine to let your in-laws know you're in labor (if you want to) and then not give updates. I'd wait and see how you feel in the moment! I think you're right that it won't be high on your priority list to update them during labor. You'll be just a little busy. :happy: googly-eyes on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557743 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 23:01:08 +0000 googly-eyes 1557743@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We texted our moms when I was admitted at 8cm. One is out of town, one we told to wait til she was here. She was born early in the morning and we texted a pic! I was in labor a long time. Next time one mom or my dad will be watching lo1 and if the mom(s) want to be in the hospital they are welcome to wait around...last time I felt weird about people waiting on me. I want to say they could be in the room if they want but it'll depend on how things are going! Hopefully everyone is in town around then. I would like the company next time especially with having lo1 around! :) sera_87 on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557680 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 22:08:28 +0000 sera_87 1557680@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We told my mom after he had arrived (but she was out of country anyway). ChelseaRose on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557648 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 21:51:28 +0000 ChelseaRose 1557648@https://boards.hellobee.com/ After he was born! Mae on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557636 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 21:45:24 +0000 Mae 1557636@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I asked my husband tonight when he had planned to call his parents and he was like "ummmmm when she is born??" lol I explained the convo with my mom and he said there is no way he wants to call his family until she is here. He said he thinks there is no reason to get them all excited for updates that aren't coming because no one needs to know the state of my cervix except us (sound familiar.. lol I think we were made for each other). He said if they explicitly ask him before we get to that point to let them know when I go into labor he will, but will make clear it will just be an "FYI" with no status updates until post-birth. And if they don't explicitly ask then he will just call them a few hours after birth when we're settled. Sounds like a plan to me :) Tidybee on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557319 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 18:06:44 +0000 Tidybee 1557319@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My water broke at 2:45am, so we waited until we were checked in and I was progressing to call them. We ended up calling around 6am when I was checked and already 6 cm. They had a 2 1/2 hour drive ahead of them and they wanted to be at the hospital when the baby was born. They all made it in time. Rainbow Sprinkles on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557286 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 17:43:40 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 1557286@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We texted them when we were on our way to the hospital! Rockies11 on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557284 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 17:41:48 +0000 Rockies11 1557284@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think I would leave it to your DH to decide, since it probably wouldn't be you that's calling anyway. For us, I never even thought about it until my water broke, and I called my DH to tell him, hung up, immediately called him back and told him not to tell anyone until we knew it was my water because I didn't want his relatives to know if I had just peed myself or something. Then I stood up, realized it was water, called him back and said it was fine to tell people. So he called whoever he wanted to from his side in whatever detail he wanted! I think they're his support people (theoretically) so he can decide if they're people he wants for support during the time. wonderstruck on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557219 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 16:58:53 +0000 wonderstruck 1557219@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My family was at the hospital, but they still got next to no updates! When you are going through unmedicated labor (in my experience, anyways), there is no way in hell you will want your DH stopping whatever he's doing to support you so that he can update the parents! Even when all I wanted from him was sitting next to me in silent support, if I had seen a phone in his hand I probably would've smashed it. Labor is just really intense, and honestly people who want updates during it are being kind of selfish - they're not thinking of you and DH and what's best for the labor process...they just want their updates. I wish I'd waited longer to tell people we were in labor. We had to tell DH's parents right away because we dropped the dog off at their house on our way to the hospital, and specifically told them to NOT come until we were admitted, since we weren't even 100% sure that would happen. Guess who called an hour later to say they were on their way? And we made them turn around and go back home because at that point I hadn't been admitted but was in awful pain that I really did not want to hear my ILs commentary on! LuLu Mom on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557200 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 16:45:29 +0000 LuLu Mom 1557200@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Our parents were the only ones (besides my work) who knew we were getting induced. We told everyone else after she was here. My mom text my sisters that night (midnight) but everyone else was alerted the next morning when I woke up. It was a long night (recovery until 2 am) so it wasn't a high priority for me! Next time is a C-section so I will let people know since it will hopefully be a quicker situation. Mae on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557196 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 16:41:01 +0000 Mae 1557196@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @septca: lol I know. It's weird because my parents seem more upset by my "exclusion" of my inlaws than my inlaws do (my father in law had told me he wanted us to call the moment I go into labor so they could hop in the car and be here for her birth. I said hellz to the no. Which my parents were aghast at. My FIL seemed perhaps a little surprised but quickly said that was fine and that they understood why we would need a bit of space and to just let us know when we are ready for visitors after we get home). I guess I feel like if I were them I would THINK I would want to know, but really I wouldn't. Because if I knew my DIL was in labor I'd spend all day anxious and watching the clock and wondering what is going on and waiting for that call. When whats going on is.. I'm in labor. And I'm still in labor. And I'm still in labor. And I'm still in labor. lol. Just seems easier to save them the stress and get to make the call like "Guess what! You've got a granddaughter!" But who knows-- maybe when I ask my husband tonight he'll surprise me with a strong opinion one way or the other. Them being his parents, I will defer to him if he has a preference! bhbee on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557178 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 16:25:36 +0000 bhbee 1557178@https://boards.hellobee.com/ everyone lived out of state and no one was coming immediately for us. DH called our parents when we went to the hospital (after my water broke, 7 hours in, and there was definitely no going back), and then after LO was born. I had kind of a long labor so it did create some anxiety, but I think they were happy to be included. we made it clear up front that it would just be the one update and they should give us space until we were ready to send more. totally depends on your family whether this would work but it was a good compromise for us. Grace on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557080 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 15:45:33 +0000 Grace 1557080@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I told them when she was born. They weren't happy with the plan, but I told them that I wanted to have the fun of phoning them and saying "Good morning Oma/Opa!" MadamBabyFever on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557053 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 15:35:16 +0000 MadamBabyFever 1557053@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I'm not even KU yet, but this is a topic I've been thinking about a lot> My parents live in another country and hubs family are 4 hours away so my plan is not to have anyone there and not let anyone know anything until it's over. I'd just like it to be me and hubs during that time, everything else will intrude soon enough. Of course this might all change when it's a reality rather than a hypothetical situation for us. mrsrain on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557042 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 15:30:40 +0000 mrsrain 1557042@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We plan to call or text and let immediate family know when I go into labor (to the point where we are on our way to the birth center or expect to be going there soon), and then not again until she is born. The only exception to that might be if labor takes longer than expected or if I have to transfer to hospital or something. Baby Boy Mom on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557035 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 15:28:02 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 1557035@https://boards.hellobee.com/ DH just called one time once we got to the hospital. avivoca on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1557021 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 15:23:18 +0000 avivoca 1557021@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My husband called my mom and left a message saying I was in labor and at the hospital. She called back later, but I was pushing and I seriously would have gutted him if he took her call. I didn't want anyone waiting in the waiting room or trying to barge in while I was laboring, so we kept it to ourselves. It helped that I didn't go to the hospital until 5 am and she was born nearly four hours later. sunshineandsushi on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556997 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 15:14:49 +0000 sunshineandsushi 1556997@https://boards.hellobee.com/ After I went into labor, once we knew that we were having the c-section that night, DH called my parents and his to let them know, since it was 11 p.m. Then, I think he called after the surgery was done, which was around 3 a.m. Kind of awkward, since my dad and I weren't actually on speaking terms at the time! But, it was like nothing had ever happened since my dad knew exactly why DH would be calling so late at night and he knew I was almost due. Both our dads live 1.5 hours away, my dad drove up the next morning, around 11 a.m., his dad waited until the next day to give us time. Our mothers live out of state, so we did talk to them the next day after we had caught some zzzs. Honeydew on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556995 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 15:13:55 +0000 Honeydew 1556995@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My DH was the only one at the hospital while in I was in labor. We decided it was best to text to let everyone that was on a need to know basis(close family like both parents, and our siblings) status texts. He texted when we were on the way to the hospital, when we were admitted, before we started pushing, he called my mom to help her not to worry when it was decided I needed to have a C-section, and then called everyone when the baby arrived. I don't think it is necessary to have a twitter like feed via text. Just the important info. septca on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556978 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 15:09:37 +0000 septca 1556978@https://boards.hellobee.com/ You are just beginning a loooonnnnnnng period of other people trying to tell you how to do things. Your mom really doesn't need to be involved in this discussion, so I would just nicely tell her how kind it is that she is thinking of your in laws and leave it at that. My mom was our doula, so she was there before my labor even started. She called my dad and my husband called his parents when my labor started, but then we were off to the races, so I *think* those same calls (my mom to my dad and my husband to his parents) happened again once DD was born and we were settled into our postpartum room. We had an email to all of our friends and family set up beforehand. My husband just added DD's name and stats and a picture and sent it out to announce her birth. I think it went out the evening she was born or maybe the next morning? (You can probably tell that *I* was not super involved in any of the announcing. I delegated. :silly: ) kiddosc on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556970 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 15:07:08 +0000 kiddosc 1556970@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Before we headed to the hospital I had talked to my mom a few times, and we let them know when we were heading in... but they were flying in the next morning and we needed to tell them we couldn't pick them up from the airport. I'm not even sure how the in-laws found out, I never thought about it. DH just took care of it. We had told everyone much earlier that we didn't want visitors until after the birth, so that's when people came but I'm pretty sure everyone knew when we were admitted. Modern Daisy on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556935 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 14:58:37 +0000 Modern Daisy 1556935@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I made DH keep quiet until I was admitted. I didn't want to excite everyone if they were just going to send me home. At that point he sent updates every hour or so just to our parents then we called once he was born whodat on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556931 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 14:57:47 +0000 whodat 1556931@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Before we headed off to the hospital, I called my dad and told him, and texted my mom. I also texted her one cervix update later. I was pleasantly surprised that she didn't keep texting me for updates throughout the day. Adira on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556903 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 14:47:56 +0000 Adira 1556903@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We called our parents after we got settled in the hospital just to let them know that I was in labor and then we called them again once he was born. matador84 on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556901 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 14:47:43 +0000 matador84 1556901@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Mae: true! That was the case with both kids! Mae on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556887 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 14:44:58 +0000 Mae 1556887@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @matador84: lol not like you had time to call ANYONE about being in labor really... ;) @anandam: Yea I plan to have my phone handy because my husband made me some labor playlists we plan to have loaded on there. But I"m turning it on airplane mode. And I'll probably suggest my husband turn his off or leave it in his bag. I guess I may feel differently if I planned to have an epidural because from my understanding you have quite a bit of "down time" then usually where you are pretty comfortable between getting the epi and when it is tim to push. But if I make it through med free I think both DH and I are going to be pretty focused on getting baby out the whole time and not have time for texting :) coopsmama on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556878 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 14:43:28 +0000 coopsmama 1556878@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I thought the same you did... there really is no point to knowing anything until baby has arrived! I didn't want my parents or in-laws, both local, in the delivery room. My midwife had told me that, for some women, the stress of their families knowing she was in labor was enough to stall labor so I told them in advance we'd text them as soon as he had arrived. However, my home birth delivery didn't go as planned and after 30 hours of active labor where I got stalled at 9cm, we had to transport to the hospital. This really shook my DH up so he called both sets of parents and asked them for prayers and let them know what was going on. At that point, I didn't care at all that they knew. anandam on "If your family wasn't at the hospital... when did you tell them you were in labor?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-family-wasnt-at-the-hospital-when-did-you-tell-them-you-were-in-labor#post-1556845 Wed, 09 Apr 2014 14:35:19 +0000 anandam 1556845@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We're closer to ILs than it sounds like you guys are, so I'm thinking we'll maybe send a text or quick call to let them know once we're admitted, with the caveat that it could be 2 days still so don't get antsy, and then turn phones off. Seriously don't need to be bothered for progress updates or hear MIL's ringtone from DH's phone while pushing!