https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 21 Apr 2026 07:49:02 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967816 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 14:28:54 +0000 MrsMccarthy 1967816@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom was a wonderful mom but she just isn't very present for our son. I know she wishes she could be more involved but she lets my dad run the show and he is very selfish most of the time. I look forward to seeing them and she is wonderful with my son and loves him but she isn't rocking at being a grandma like she did at being a mom. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967791 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 14:20:43 +0000 LuLu Mom 1967791@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can't pick, I think my mom was a great mom (she had her hands full with me) and she's a great grandma, I'm very lucky to have her in both my life and my girls' lives! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967777 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 14:17:17 +0000 Ra 1967777@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom is a rockstar at both! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967594 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 13:17:13 +0000 JerricaBenton 1967594@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Haha I actually think my mom is a better mom than grandma. She and I are very close and she adores LO but now she's in that 'chicks out of the nest' type second adolescence in that it's all about her. She has a very active social life and she just isn't in baby mode. She loves being with her but not so much in a babysitting role. I'm sure that might change as LO gets older and more independent. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967575 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 13:10:18 +0000 jmarionsmith 1967575@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>another vote for "it's complicated" but i actually voted for better mom.</p> <p>i just had to have a come to jesus meeting with my mom about stepping up as a grandma. i know she absolutely loves her grandchildren but she is still pretty young (47) and has a very full and active life which makes it hard for her to find time to fit them in. she didn't seem to understand that a quick lunch, at a restaurant, is not good bonding time for a toddler.</p> <p>it hurt her feelings but she said she needed to hear that because she wants a close relationship with her grandkids.</p> <p>as a mom she's awesome. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967574 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 13:07:30 +0000 MrsTiz 1967574@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom is awesome at both! One thing she's said before, and I've noticed to be true is that she has more patience as a grandma than she did as a mother. She certainly has more patience than I do, that's for sure </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967556 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 13:00:21 +0000 MrsF 1967556@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Awesome at both. I really have a lot to live up to :happy: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967539 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 12:55:08 +0000 Mamasig 1967539@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lilteacherbee: my brother still harbors a grudge towards my mom because of this. She Rarely gets to see his kids. He doesn't make an effort for them to have a relationship. It's really sad and I feel bad for my mom because she really is an awesome grandmother. His kids are missing out. I'm just glad she has gotten to experience mine on a daily basis and is watching them grow. She is also a huge help to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967499 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 12:39:26 +0000 Mrs. J 1967499@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Amazing at both! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967478 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 12:28:40 +0000 lilteacherbee 1967478@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamasig: This is pretty much my mom, too. I think she TRIED to be a good mom, but she's always been very high strung which made her yell a lot and get upset over the smallest things. As a grandma, though? She's awesome. She keeps my LO while I work and I love it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967419 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 12:04:02 +0000 birdofafeather 1967419@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom is pretty awesome at both. Still a great mom and a ridiculously great grandma. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967196 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 10:50:40 +0000 Mrs. Chocolate 1967196@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yin: Yes this is my mom. We dont have the best relationship and she is very generous financially but as a parent and care giver she really isnt the best </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967192 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 10:49:47 +0000 Mrs. Chocolate 1967192@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>truthfully my mom isnt particularly good at either :/ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967189 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 10:48:26 +0000 cascademom 1967189@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think that my mom rocks at both being a mom and a grandma. I say this because my brother and I turned out okay, motivated, and happily well adjusted people. She's great at being a grandmother as well because she really loves them and cares deeply. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1967028 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 09:33:22 +0000 yin 1967028@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not so awesome at both? I have issues with my mother. I will admit that my parents have been very generous to my kids financially. My mom felt the need to help with DS1's tuition for preschool and gave him enough to cover the cost for 3 months of school. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1966997 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 09:16:03 +0000 Jess1483 1966997@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom was an excellent mom and grandmother. She struggled to set and enforce rules, which isn't as important as a grandma, so maybe a little better, but great at both!</p> <p>My dad, on the other hand, is a much better grandpa than dad. Much more patience. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1966973 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 09:01:50 +0000 blackbird 1966973@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Where's the "it's complicated" option? :silly: I don't think my mom hasn't fully accepted her role as grandma yet....she was a great mom, but things got complicated as I grew up </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1966963 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 08:49:35 +0000 looch 1966963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@krispi: same with us. My dad often worked 3 jobs when I was growing up, he just didn't have the time like he does now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1966951 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 08:42:40 +0000 ChitownRo 1966951@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom is sick now so it isn't really a fair comparison. But she can't take care of LO solo, lift him etc. So I listed better parent, but it isn't for a lack of effort </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1966948 Tue, 02 Dec 2014 08:34:20 +0000 krispi 1966948@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom rocks, no matter what role. I do think my dad is a better grandparent. He's much more hands on than he was with us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965702 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 12:59:21 +0000 keepcalmcarrie 1965702@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom is awesome at both - she was a wonderful mom growing up, I had a pretty idyllic childhood mostly because of her, and she's a great grandma - she has lots of fun with J. My MIL was a better mom, I think. She's not "bad" as a grandma or anything, but she isn't very engaging. I know she loves him, and she says she loves to be around him, but when they actually are around, it's pretty clear she would rather cook, clean, or talk to adults than really play. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965652 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 12:42:51 +0000 loveisstrange 1965652@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She's a badass at both. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965629 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 12:33:23 +0000 lovehoneybee 1965629@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom is definitely a better grandma, but it's not as cut and dry as her not being a good mom, she just wasn't around, due to circumstances partly beyond her control. She's a better mom to me now that she has access to me outside of my father, and she's a great grandma. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965624 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 12:33:01 +0000 BandDmommy 1965624@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Awesome at both! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965622 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 12:31:07 +0000 Little Misters Mom 1965622@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ElbieKay: This is exactly how it is for us. Being able to focus on LO takes a lot of the pressure off our relationship. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965504 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 11:49:01 +0000 Mae 1965504@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think my parents were great parents and they are great grandparents too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965491 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 11:45:29 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 1965491@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She rocks at both. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965439 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 11:26:30 +0000 Bao 1965439@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She's fricken amazing at both!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965437 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 11:25:57 +0000 ElbieKay 1965437@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom really needs to feel needed, and that gets in the way of our relationship because I have always had a pretty independent personality. I get along with her better now that I have a baby because (a) we can both focus on him so we are less focused on each other and (b) my parents volunteered to watch the baby two afternoons per week, so they feel much more needed.</p> <p>I'm not sure that I answered the question. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-mother-a-better-mom-or-better-grandma#post-1965416 Mon, 01 Dec 2014 11:17:33 +0000 Anagram 1965416@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd say both my mom and MIL rocked at both, but their styles are very different. My mom is very go-go-go and grandkids are expected to go along (and we were as kids, too). She travels a lot (and took us and now sometimes takes grandkids) and is just very active...she has no problem doing marathon shopping trips or going from playground-pool-movies-restaurant. DHs mom is more of a homebody and a little less active, but they were both really good moms and are both really good grandmas, too.</p> <p>DHs mom is more typical grandma, where she gets super super excited to see LO do any little thing. My mom is kinda been-there-seen-it...but she had 6 kids of her own, owned a daycare, and has 8 grandkids. SO it makes sense. </p>