https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 29 Apr 2026 03:22:16 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431683 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 14:40:20 +0000 lemondrop 1431683@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We don't have a regular set up due to distance, but any time either set of parents gives us relief we usually get them a gift card for dinner or something they need. </p> <p>My IL's are helping when the new little guy arrives, I think we are taking them to dinner and getting them new house phones, every time we talk for more than 20 minutes their batteries die and disconnect. Their birthdays are around that time, so it's just a nicer gift than we would usually do since they are going to a lot of trouble to help out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431668 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 14:35:12 +0000 2PeasinaPod 1431668@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My dad and FIL watch LO during the week. We usually give them bigger gifts around Father's Day or birthdays. But my dad does it twice/week, so we get him a gas gift card. He drives about 45 minutes to and from every day he watches LO and that can take up a lot of gas! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431661 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 14:33:35 +0000 Raindrop 1431661@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom retired to take care of LO. If they didn't need the money they wouldn't take it. (Some bad family things happened when they were younger and they are in some need of money) but they only want it till my mom's retirement fund kicks-in in a few years. The money I give them does not make up for the fact of my mom's income but it was really important to them to take care of LO and was willing take the "pay-cut".</p> <p>Outside of that we try to treat them when ever possible :D </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431505 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 13:46:00 +0000 regberadaisy 1431505@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My ILs watch LO once a week for us. I highly highly doubt they would take money for it. But I have also been thinking about what to gift them as a thank you. I was just thinking we do gifts for daycae teachers all the time around the holidays, etc. But we don't thank her own grandparents!</p> <p>My mom watched my niece/nephew and now my nephew FT. She quit her job and basically retired to do that. She has no income besides the measely SS check. So yes, my brothers did and do pay her. Otherwise she wouldn't even have money to feed herself! Their situation is a little different though because she lives with them. So part of that money is family grocery money. But I know around the holidays they always give her a nice fat red envelope. My mom came and will be coming to stay with us for two months after LO is born. And each time we will give her a fat red envelope as thank you. Seeing as she won't get money from my brothers when she's not watching my nephew. I think it's the right thing to do.</p> <p>IF my ILs had quit their job to watch LO full time then I would feel differently about paying them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431499 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 13:44:08 +0000 Mrs Hedgehog 1431499@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't. They watch the Hoglet every Sunday evening while we go to a small group. They love it. So much so that the few weeks we haven't gone or have taken her with us, they actually get bummed! It is their special time with her. I joke that my mom thinks we have joint custody. </p> <p>Last week we found out a movie was playing that we really wanted to go to after the meeting and called my parents to see if they would be willing to keep her an extra couple of hours. I felt bad afterward just springing it on them but they were totally fine with it. I still gave them a gift card to their favorite movie place so they could go see one too as a Thank You. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431414 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 13:21:06 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 1431414@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL watched Noelle until she was 20 months (then we put her in preschool), then she started watching Jaren when he was born, and is going to watch him until he is 18 months. Yes - we do pay... They have no retirement, and no other source of income or else I know she wouldn't have accepted it... they were in a very difficult financial spot, so this was our way of helping them out while they help us out. It also makes us feel less guilty about her watching him all day long since it can be so tiring. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431405 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 13:19:31 +0000 bunnylovesbear 1431405@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My Mom watches my son 4 days a week from 11:30 - 4:30...for free. She would never accept payment, and I think she would be offended if I even suggested it. She's thrilled to do it and sees it as her grandmotherly duty. We're very lucky. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431160 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 12:16:19 +0000 mrs. wagon 1431160@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom lived with us for 3-4 weeks at a time to care for LMW for the first 5 months. Not sure if they would have accepted money but we didn't talk about it... they definitely didn't expect any money, but maybe they would have accepted it if we offered. At the end we bought her a North Face long coat she had her eye on and I made her a necklace with a real opal and ruby (hers and LMW's birthstones). And we bought a lot of dinners. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431155 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 12:13:13 +0000 MrsH 1431155@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We got my mom an iPhone and pay the service contract on it to try and "pay" her because she wouldn't accept money. We also feed her a lot :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431135 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 12:06:29 +0000 Corduroy 1431135@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents live 8 hours away so they don't help on a regular basis but they did come for a couple weeks to help us move and cover day care while we waited for a spot in our new city. To thank them I got them reservations at a really nice big name restaurant. The kind where you have to get reservations a month in advance. They had been talking about going there for 30 years. </p> <p>Their server made a big fuss over them when he found out their dinner was a "baby sitting thank you" instead of the millionth birthday/anniversary/date. He said they must be the best babysitters. I think that made them feel really special. They LOVED telling all their family and friends that their daughter &amp; SIL sent them out for a fancy evening. Now everyone wants to babysit for us.</p> <p>It took some advanced planning because I had to get the reservation for when they would be in town but it really wasn't THAT expensive (way less than the day care they covered). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431035 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 11:32:08 +0000 buffalove 1431035@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We do not pay them, they would not accept it. My mom and MIL split the week for us. I can sometimes slip them small Tim Hortons gift cards. I try to make birthday/holiday gifts extra special - not in the $ sense, but I try to give them something that relates to DS. (for example, they each have a song they sing to him, so I engraved frames with the song title and picture of DS). </p> <p>And I totally give in to stuff that would probably annoy most people when it comes to IL's. I let MIL brag a lot, I dress him up in clothes I don't love, I make a big deal out of getting him to say her name, and I often stay for like 30 minutes to chat when I pick him up. It's my way of repaying. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1431002 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 11:17:42 +0000 daniellemybelle 1431002@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If/when I return to work, my mom will watch LO &amp; we will pay her as if she were a nanny. She babysits a lot already though &amp; would not want to get paid for that, but we both view full time care differently. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1430811 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 10:28:14 +0000 cmomma17 1430811@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We do not and they would not accept. They love to watch LO and wish they could do it more often! It's very special for them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1430770 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 10:10:23 +0000 Mamasig 1430770@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom watches DS while DH and I work and we pay her. She gave up her job to do this for us and because she wanted to. I knew that one day I would have to pay for childcare, so I'd rather give her the money. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1430766 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 10:07:28 +0000 jedeve 1430766@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It is my dream to have my MIL nanny for us, but they live in a different town. If they ever did move and nanny, I think we would do something like pay a cleaning crew to go of to their beach house a few times a year. They wouldn't accept the money, but I couldn't do nothing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1430764 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 10:06:53 +0000 mrsjyw 1430764@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom is our primary care for DS. She watches DS at our home M-W, and I drop him off on my busy days Th/Fr. She also watches him for overnights (weddings, etc.). </p> <p>She would never accept any money. She retired to do this and her and my dad were living in an apt the past few years. DH and I bought them a home (an investment property for us) last year and they LOVE it :)</p> <p>We also use holidays/bday as an excuse to treat her and make her accept money/gifts she otherwise would not accept. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1430756 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 10:04:05 +0000 Mamaof2 1430756@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom comes up a few times a year and btwn tolls and gas its a lot of money and she never lets me pay her. I usually make it up by giving her really nice birthday and Christmas and Mother's day gifts!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1430754 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 10:03:54 +0000 looch 1430754@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents are our before/aftercare. All in, it's probably about 20 hours a week.</p> <p>They would never accept payment, it would be insulting to them. They love the time they have with my son, he pays them in hugs and kisses. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1430751 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 10:03:29 +0000 Mrs. Jump Rope 1430751@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents would never accept it. I try to sneak treating them to things like dinner, but my parents usually scoff and pay instead. </p> <p>It makes me kind of uncomfortable when they offer us hockey tickets and say they'll babysit. The tickets are really expensive, so I almost feel like they're paying us! We've gone to two games in the last almost-3 years because it really does make me feel awful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1430747 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 10:01:36 +0000 Smurfette 1430747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just bought my parents some artwork as a Thank You for all the times they have babysat. They would never take money. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/if-your-parents-help-with-childcare#post-1430730 Tue, 18 Feb 2014 09:57:44 +0000 Mrs. Pen 1430730@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>do you pay them? would they accept it?</p> <p>My mom babysits J for about 5 hours every Wednesday when I go to school. It is a HUGE help, and I couldn't take on school and working without her help. I want to "pay her back", but I'm not sure how. A big gift, maybe? </p> <p>How do you thank your parents for childcare? </p>