https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 06 Jun 2026 03:23:59 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/international-adoption#post-2858368 Mon, 26 Nov 2018 12:50:45 +0000 Mrs. Turtle 2858368@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have to agree with others here. The ethics of adoption, especially international adoption, were too hard for us to come to terms with. This is why we chose foster care/adoption (which has ethical issues of it's own, of course, but at least there is an attempt at family preservation). I've heard often that adoption is a permanent solution to a temporary problem (usually poverty). If the money could go toward family preservation efforts, I believe the vast majority of birth mothers would choose to keep their babies. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/international-adoption#post-2858353 Mon, 26 Nov 2018 11:08:52 +0000 Pollywog 2858353@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I know the people who run this organization and they are phenomenal. <a href="https://heartofgodhaiti.org" rel="nofollow">https://heartofgodhaiti.org</a>. I recommend reaching out to them and have donated to them.</p> <p>I agree with the others that the ethics of adoption can be icky. Many of these kids have parents, but their parents are too poor to take care of them. A better policy solution would be foreign aid and infrastructure development. But on a micro level these kids need homes and it's great to adopt if you're okay with the ethics (that the parents may come to say goodbye at the airport and that you are making it so a parent may never see their child again). I know that sounds super harsh. I don't mean it to be. It just is something many people aren't aware of. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/international-adoption#post-2858345 Mon, 26 Nov 2018 09:40:54 +0000 gotkimchi 2858345@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pachamama: I belive Korea is closed.</p> <p> My husband and his sister (not biological) were adopted from Korea in the 80s. My husband is doing well, his sister has a lot of feels about the situation and has tried to contact her birth family and in a pretty wild situation it seems the husband told the wife she had died or was stillborn so the mother didn’t even know. After a few letters they cut off contact and I’m sure this was very disrupting in their lives as well. His sister is very active in the adoptee community now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/international-adoption#post-2858343 Mon, 26 Nov 2018 09:30:50 +0000 Kaohinani 2858343@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi, Lazb!<br /> This may not be exactly what you are looking for. My 2nd cousin adopted internationally. She did so after her US adoption fell through. She was also very wary of international adoption for the above listed reasons, as well as, because sometimes, one does not end up with his/her child (same as in the US). She did her research and found Rainbow Kids (rainbowkids.com). They are international adoptions for children with special needs whose parents have left them. Some have higher needs and some have more minimal needs (such as were born preemies and were failure to thrive but are now doing well but may need minor educational support in Prek and grade school due to developmental delays). This adoption institution is not an agency perse but it helps you to navigate international adoption... It the same as used by the Little Couple. Anyway, she had adopted an adorable little boy from China (aged 3) that had been born with a congenital heart condition. He has not needed any further surgeries as of yet. He is now 5. I don't speak with them often but I do see pictures and receive updates from my aunt and, from what I hear, it was the best decision my cousin and her husband ever made. I do not know if this would be an option for you. I just figured I would put it out there. :heart:</p> <p><a href="https://www.rainbowkids.com/waiting-children" rel="nofollow">https://www.rainbowkids.com/waiting-children</a> </p> [attach=9021/18/pit2oh.292x600.Screenshot_20181126-095117_Chrome.jpg] https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/international-adoption#post-2858342 Mon, 26 Nov 2018 09:09:05 +0000 pachamama 2858342@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not sure this is advice but wanted to share our story. We adopted my sister from Peru when she was 2 in 1989. Things were very different then. Since then most of Latin America and Russia has closed their doors due to corruption and unfortunately politics aka men in power. This is prettty wild, but there was actually some talk of child trafficking issues with my sister's adoption (mostly just paperwork stuff and how the adoptions were handled) and our adoption lawyer from long Island was placed in jail for a while! It was on 60 Minutes 😬My sister's two sisters were adopted out and live in the metro New York area and are doing great. We are in contact with her family in Peru because I speak Spanish. Her brother is still down there and doing well. The mother is heartbroken though of course because she gave her three girls up at ages 5, 2 and 6 weeks.<br /> From what I know I think only Korea and a few Asian countries are open to adoptions? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/international-adoption#post-2858336 Mon, 26 Nov 2018 07:14:52 +0000 Mrs. Snowflake 2858336@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsbubbletea: Yes, I agree with this.</p> <p>I have to do more research, but from what I've seen, the international adoption system is extremely corrupt. Though actually, a similar thing happens in the US with infant adoption (obviously not in all cases but in some): birth parents are paid to give up their children and fed rhetoric that makes adoption seem like their only option and keeping the baby seem selfish. </p> <p>I'm not sure if we will adopt; but if we ever do, foster adopting is the only way I could see doing it (even though I know how emotionally difficult and intense that is). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/international-adoption#post-2858328 Sun, 25 Nov 2018 23:11:29 +0000 mrsbubbletea 2858328@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think adoption can be a beautiful thing but I find international adoption to be extremely tricky to “do right”. I have learned a lot in following a friend of a friend on social media who is an adult adopted from India as a baby. She had a wonderful relationship with her adoptive parents but she is very vocal about how complicated living as an adult adoptee is. This is an example of what kind of stuff she posts that would make me think twice. </p> [attach=5674/18/pis91i.277x600.2F25416B-D739-427E-B03F-0AB8A8D2F5CC.png] https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/international-adoption#post-2858284 Sun, 25 Nov 2018 13:35:40 +0000 LAZB 2858284@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Whether or not we are able to have another biological child, we have talked about international adoption. My SIL (brother’s wife), and SIL and BIL (dh’s Siblings) were all adopted domestically, so it’s a distant consideration, but I have known several families that have been heartbroken by domestic adoption, so right now we are preferring international.<br /> We aren’t 100% going to do it, but we talk about it a lot.<br /> Any idea where to start looking? Reputable agencies? </p>