https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 16 Apr 2026 01:50:27 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-224459 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 20:44:54 +0000 mediagirl 224459@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm still sort of tender when I poop, there's no way we're doing it anytime soon! Also, totally the last thing on our minds right now. Poor dh when it does happen, no play with the girls. He will be so sad. Haha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-224366 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 19:57:31 +0000 Boogs 224366@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a c-section mama so maybe it was different for me? The first handful of times weren't great, but after that we both really enjoyed it. For some reason almost more than before! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-224299 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 18:30:57 +0000 littlek 224299@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We got cleared yesterday. We are waiting till I get my birth control shot tomorrow before we DTD. I'm a little scared because we haven't DTD since was pregnant and I know it's going to hurt. I had a lot of bleeding 1st trimester and then DH was freaked out I would go into pre term labor. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-224243 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 17:07:52 +0000 chrispygal 224243@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am only 12 days out but already counting the days until we get clearance at 6 weeks post pardom. Maybe it's the hormones or the fact that we didn't have much of a sex life in the 3rd trimester but man, I cannot wait! lol. I'm hoping it won't hurt! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-224199 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 16:27:16 +0000 MegWag 224199@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The first couple of times we did it it was definitely a little painful, but those were both just a few weeks pp. The first time we did it was 3.5 weeks pp, but we too got interrupted! Now, at 4.5 mos, it's usually great. In fact, I think some times it feels better than before. That said, if we go to quickly or I'm not revved up enough it does hurt a little before we really get going.<br /> @Mrsbells: That's really interesting about BF impacting moisture levels! Did your doctor say why? I'm totally curious about the physiology of it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223958 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 13:20:12 +0000 808love 223958@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My hard labor included 3 hours of pushing. So I was in sooo much pain for so long! Still we tried every so often. It took us 17 months and now we are finally pain free. Woohooo... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223951 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 13:16:35 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 223951@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>it does get better and better with each time. Maybe things are bad because you waited so long? We did it at 6 weeks pp and it did hurt, and hurt the next few times after. Now, however we are at 9 weeks PP and it is just like old times. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223824 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 12:20:40 +0000 skibobrown 223824@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, the first few times it definitely hurt! I guess a big part of it is that if you tore, the scar tissue is much less flexible than regular skin. It will stretch out, but it just takes time. It's definitely been getting better each time, and now it almost feels back to normal. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223772 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 11:36:17 +0000 Sammyfab 223772@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think we tried until 7-8 weeks pp and it definitely hurt...and the next few times after as well! Now it doesn't hurt that much but we still don't do it as often as we did pre-baby. I think we are just old and tired! Haha </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223753 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 11:05:31 +0000 Mrsbells 223753@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I posted about this here, we tried around 9 weeks and it was painful too. My OB told me this is due to vaginal dryness especially if you breastfeed. All I can say is use lots and lots and lots of lubricant and it gets better!. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223736 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:45:06 +0000 winniebee 223736@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ugh sorry! 2 mos post Partum and we haven't even tried. DH is waiting for the green light from me but I'm too frigging tired as LO doesn't sleep through the night yet. Also I'm not into condoms and haven't started my mini pill yet bc am nervous it will mess with my milk supply. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223728 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:36:41 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 223728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The first few times hurt, and at 5.5 months pp, it still hurts a little if he goes too fast in the beginning or goes too long. We still use a lot of lube but for the most part it's back to the way it was before LO. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223721 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:28:33 +0000 Mrs. Pen 223721@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsjazz: @cvbee: that's what we did as well - we have an extra room with a futon that we cuddle up in. But we just transitioned DS to his own room and it's been a lot more comfortable for me being in my own bed. </p> <p>However, we have done stuff while he was sleeping in the room - I would say if your LO is sleeping (deep sleep!!) it should be fine unless you or your DH is too creeped out by that lol.</p> <p>@looch: @autumnlove: Yup, that's another reason it took us over 4 months! I was jumping at any chance I could get to catch some zzz's!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223705 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:18:44 +0000 Mrs. Train 223705@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a c section and I don't think it's as bad but there was still pain. It lasted for a couple of times then returned to normal </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223703 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:17:31 +0000 mrsjazz 223703@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cvbee: I didn't realize our LO's shared a birthday! Isn't 3 months so exciting? </p> <p>We do have an extra bedroom that has become our baby storage/guest room/cat room so we might have to try this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223696 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:13:43 +0000 chopsuey 223696@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We did it for the first time a few days shy of 6 weeks pp. It didn't hurt, but it didn't feel great either. It got better and better though!<br /> Try to relax, not to think about anythign other than your DH and have lots of foreplay! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223694 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:12:57 +0000 cvbee 223694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: LO is 3 months today and we have maybe tried about 6 times, and it has been successful maybe 3 or 4 depending on the measure of 'success'. It can be good one weekend and then the next weekend not work out, so I am sure there are multiple factors at play. </p> <p> @mrsjazz: 3 months today?! Hey birth date twin!!!!!! We share a room with baby, but have a guest room downstairs, which is now the sex room. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223689 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:12:16 +0000 autumnlove 223689@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: I had a C-section so I expected things to resume the first month but I was always too exhausted! My friend delivered vaginally and had sex after 3 weeks...I was impressed! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223688 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:12:02 +0000 looch 223688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We were too tired the first few months to even think about sex, any time we were in bed we were sleeping!</p> <p>Physically, we waited until after I got the all clear from my doctor and I felt better from the lower back pain I was experiencing. I would guess it was around the 3 month mark when we tried, my husband used his fingers first to make sure I was ok. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223681 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:07:53 +0000 mrsjazz 223681@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO is 3 months today. We still haven't done the deed although we've talked about how we might execute this since we use a co-sleeper with LO. No idea how this might work. </p> <p>I had a C-section so I think things below should be ok since I didn't have to deal with stretching/tearing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223670 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 10:01:17 +0000 Mrs. Pen 223670@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cvbee: oh thank goodness it's not just me. Have you guys done it a lot? It's only been twice for us. So I'm not sure how long it takes before it starts feeling normal again..</p> <p>about c-section moms - yeah... I would think so!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223668 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 09:59:45 +0000 cvbee 223668@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>oh, and I'm wondering if c-section mamas have an easier time? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223667 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 09:59:35 +0000 autumnlove 223667@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We didn't resume relations until LO was out of our room at 4.5 months.(We went away on a weekend trip without LO at 3 months but I had AF!!) I was tense the first time but now it is back to normal! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223666 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 09:59:28 +0000 cvbee 223666@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yep. I've been blaming mine on the episiotomy stitch-up: I think I've got a SMALLER cha cha now or something. But maybe it is the case for everyone. It is ALWAYS harder to get it in now, and sometimes it goes in easier than other times. But I tell DH that he has to be okay with me saying 'not this time' or I also have requested to not go any further when it is 'half way in' at other times. He's been very cooperative. Sometimes we can really go all the way and it feels almost good. almost. </p> <p>I also find a glass of wine and lots of lube to be very helpful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223665 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 09:58:51 +0000 Adira 223665@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Coco Bee: Hmm... Maybe you just need to take it slower? I know that it's going to be hard for your husband to one to slow down when he's used to not having to, but this is like your first time all over again (except worse), so he needs to be patient with you. Use LOTS of lube and try just taking things slow. Like don't expect either of you to be able to orgasm the first few times. Maybe as long as he knows you're willing to try as long as he's willing to take things slow, that will make it easier. Then if you take it slow a few times, you'll get more used to it and it will stop hurting as much (hopefully) and eventually you'll be back to normal! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223662 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 09:55:37 +0000 Mrs. Pen 223662@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: yep we definitely used lots of it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223660 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 09:54:58 +0000 Adira 223660@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I haven't had this experience yet, but can I suggest lots and lots of lube?? I know that when I'm not in the mood (but am willing to do it for Hubs), lube is KEY to our success. I know that's not the same as having just had a baby, but it should be able to help! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/intimacy-after-baby#post-223655 Tue, 17 Jul 2012 09:52:20 +0000 Mrs. Pen 223655@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oooookay... so it kind of took DH and I quite awhile to get to doing it again after DS was born. We did other stuff for fun but never DTD until quite recently. Part of the reason it took us 4+ months is also because several times we'd start to try and guess who would wake up crying lol - it was like he KNEW! lol</p> <p>Anyhow... so we finally have done it a few times and I'm sorry to say it actually hurts. I'm wondering if this is the case for anyone else? I did not enjoy it one bit and was so happy when it was over. But now DH is mad at me for saying that I didn't like it/it hurt/I don't wanna do it again! I mean, I understand that he's frustrated, but he doesn't even seem to care about how it made me feel at all. I dunno... at this point I'd be totally fine with not doing it ever again haha! But I know that's not fair to DH either. But now I'm really nervous to try again.</p> <p>What was your experience like? </p>