https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 06 Jul 2026 07:00:40 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017800 Thu, 15 Aug 2013 02:06:35 +0000 erinpye 1017800@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>While many people have more these days, it used to be a first-time mother had 1 shower, and all family should absolutely be invited. Even if you think they'll throw you their own, it's not worth it to cause division or hurt feelings in your family. Your DH's family is also your family now, and your MIL will be "grandma" to your LO, not an in-law. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017594 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 22:32:49 +0000 Corduroy 1017594@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine surprised me by flying across the country with SIL to attend the shower and stay with us for four days. I was much too pregnant for houseguests. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017568 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 22:09:33 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 1017568@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: bahahhaha.....sorry to laugh but, your MIL never ceases to amaze... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017408 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 20:40:41 +0000 MapleMoose 1017408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're having one coed baby shower that my parents are hosting, so both sides are invited. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017371 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 20:27:36 +0000 NavyRN2012 1017371@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I only had one shower, but it would never occur to me to not invite her. LO is her grand baby too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017202 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 19:08:44 +0000 GrapeCrush 1017202@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had one shower that was for both sides of the family that was thrown by my mom, stepmom and MIL. I'm sure we would have invited her if we had separate ones however </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017182 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 19:02:10 +0000 fancyfunction 1017182@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, I had an all-inclusive shower. My MIL wanted to throw me a shower but my mom was already planning one and I didn't want two separate ones. It didn't make sense to me to have one for my side and for her to throw one for her family. And I would have been really irate if she threw one and didn't invite my mother. My side and her side are only about an hour's drive so we had it where I grew up and made it work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017157 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 18:51:18 +0000 MsMini 1017157@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My sisters threw my baby shower, we invited both sides of the family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017156 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 18:50:47 +0000 Foodnerd81 1017156@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL lives across the country, but she was invited just in case. She actually flew out just for my wedding shower! She couldn't come but I wanted her to feel included because a) I really like her and we get along very well; b) she was as excited, if not more, for the baby as my side was; and c) she only has sons so I'm the closest thing she has to a daughter so I try to include her in any motherly things I can (like, I scheduled a dress fitting while she was visiting before our wedding so she could be part of it, though I went shopping with only my mom) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017151 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 18:48:10 +0000 regberadaisy 1017151@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't have a shower on my side but if I did I.absolutely would've invited my MIL. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017141 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 18:43:19 +0000 wonderstruck 1017141@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it's different than a bridal shower - the wedding was for both of you, and you're both this baby's parents. I don't exactly click with my MIL, she's not someone I'd be friendly with if it weren't for her son, but yes she was invited. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017132 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 18:37:37 +0000 oliviaoblivia 1017132@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I invited MIL. She didn't come. Or send a card. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017112 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 18:25:57 +0000 jmarionsmith 1017112@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <br /><p><i>This comment has been deleted by the original poster.</i></p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017103 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 18:20:21 +0000 heffalump 1017103@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm pretty close to my mil so I would invite her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017093 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 18:06:52 +0000 mrsbookworm 1017093@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd invite your MIL even if she might be planning another shower. She can always refuse, but at least you've made the effort and her feelings won't be hurt. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017074 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 17:52:08 +0000 LovelyPlum 1017074@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Leialou: and I hope that is very soon!!! (Sorry for the minor thread jack :) ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017056 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 17:31:29 +0000 cascademom 1017056@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>MIL was invited to my baby shower. We did it more as a courtesy than anything else. She's been invited to other showers, etc. but doesn't attend because she's many states away. My aunt absolutely despises my MIL and hated the fact that we even included her on the invite list to the showers that she's thrown me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017049 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 17:27:24 +0000 autumnlove 1017049@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I invited my mil! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017042 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 17:24:43 +0000 Ginabean3 1017042@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In our family we never have "her side" vs "his side" showers....it's just one shower! I adore my MIL though, so of course I want her to come! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017041 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 17:24:22 +0000 Mrs. Pickle 1017041@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Whenever I have a shower I will invite my MIL. She's close to my mom and I will want her there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017038 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 17:22:31 +0000 Ash 1017038@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd invite them! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017035 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 17:20:44 +0000 kjpugs 1017035@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our parents/families live across the country from one another so it wasn't an issue for us. If I were you I'd have DH ask his mom if she is throwing a shower or knows of one her side of the family is throwing. I would just want to make sure there's a shower on that side of the family. If so I don't think it's a bad idea to invite her and any other immediate family members (SIL's or grandmas) but you don't want to invite them and have them think "oh good now I don't have to throw a shower." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1017033 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 17:19:04 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 1017033@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsTiz: same. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1016997 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 17:01:01 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 1016997@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would invite my MIL to a shower if she we were local. I would expect the grandmother's get invited the showers regardless of who's family hosts. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1016980 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 16:56:09 +0000 MrsTiz 1016980@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>All of DH'a family is invited. I can't imagine having a shower where my family is invited and his isnt </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1016943 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 16:39:17 +0000 Pirouette 1016943@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>will you be traveling to NY for the shower? and your MIL lives near your hometown? for me, everyone is local, so there would be no reason not to combine the families.</p> <p>I think it comes down to whether your MIL would be hurt not to be invited, even if she wouldn't travel to attend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1016926 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 16:30:44 +0000 yin 1016926@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL and DH's aunts were invited to my baby shower thrown by my sisters. It was my only baby shower, and I wanted them to be part of it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1016890 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 16:13:09 +0000 artsyfartsy 1016890@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL has passed, but my SIL, cousins in law, granny in law, aunts in law, etc. are all thrilled for this baby. They are close to DH and its his baby too. So I think they have every right to come and should be invited. I'm only having one shower.</p> <p>But I'm on good terms with my in laws so it may be different if you're not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1016886 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 16:11:15 +0000 Pink Champagne 1016886@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We live in the same town as MIL, so she gets invited to everything. We didnt have a baby shower in my hometown, but if we had I would have felt obligated to invite her so that her feelings wouldn't get hurt (she gets butt-hurt over everything, *eye roll*) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/inviting-mil-to-shower-question#post-1016873 Wed, 14 Aug 2013 16:04:19 +0000 wahine08 1016873@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're having one giant coed baby shower with both sides and family, so my MIL will definitely be invited. However, until you're sure there will be a DH-side baby shower I would include her on the invite list! </p>