https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 13 Apr 2026 14:32:41 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-30462 Fri, 09 Dec 2011 14:02:48 +0000 BSB 30462@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I guess it depends on what you call flirting. </p> <p>1. To make playfully romantic or sexual overtures.<br /> 2. To deal playfully, triflingly, or superficially with:</p> <p>With #1, I don't do. If there is any inkling that either of us have feelings, I get really awkward and pretty much get really shy and stop the amount of contact and conversation I have with them.</p> <p>With #2, I'll do it's just as friends and I'm fully aware to take in consideration if they are married or have a girl friend. I make sure that anything I say around them would be perfectly okay around their spouse or significant other. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-30436 Fri, 09 Dec 2011 13:45:05 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 30436@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SouthPaw: Love this "Depends, different strokes for different folks!" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-30432 Fri, 09 Dec 2011 13:39:03 +0000 SouthPaw 30432@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't mind innocent flirting however I think that it can be a slippery slope regardless of someone’s marital status. If both parties in the marriage are comfortable with innocent flirting then it is fine it’s your business. I work in a male dominate office and travel with male coworkers, we talk about sports, work, our relationships etc however there is never a line crossed where it would be inappropriate. My DH manages a team of people for his job and he has many women on his team, some of them flirt with him... not going to lie I don't like it but I trust him. Depends, different strokes for different folks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29363 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 15:29:44 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 29363@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've worked really hard to gain respect and credibility in my work life. It is so hard for women in the workplace to be seen as equals as it is, and flirting just undermines that. So I try to be professional at all times.</p> <p>Outside of work, my husband and I aren't really jealous types, but I just want him to know how much I respect him and that includes not flirting in any way. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29344 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 15:09:48 +0000 shinystraps 29344@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am really outgoing and my husband and I both joke around a lot, and are very sarcastic... all things that can come across as flirting. I definitely think there are times that both my husband and I flirt at work and it's no big deal. If there were one particular person at his office who he was flirting with ONLY, that might bother me. But the fact that women 10 years older than him like to stop in his office and laugh and talk? Doesn't bother me. He feels the same way about my work interactions. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29298 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 14:34:37 +0000 Mrs.KMM 29298@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsjyw: I'm the same way. Flirting is absolutely a part of my natural interaction with just about everyone! This includes at work.</p> <p>DH knows this and is obviously okay with it or he never would have wanted to be with me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29247 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 13:19:26 +0000 cyneswith 29247@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There was this guy I thought of as an uncle. He knew me when I was 8. He flirted with everyone. I flirted back. He ended up kissing my neck. !@#$???? He was married, too (in a "as soon as one of us meets someone else, we'll get divorced - until then, it's not worth the hassle" understanding.) </p> <p>There was another guy who was three times my age who flirted with just about every female. I met him when I was 16. When I was 18, he proposed. WTF? </p> <p>There was another guy (a divorcee with three kids, a janitor at my school's food court. Nothing wrong with that in and of itself.) He came over and started talking to me one day. I'm a reasonably nice person, so I conversed in a friendly manner. He kept conversing for about three days, then asked me out. Er... No. Then he started stalking me. He asked my co-workers for my last name or phone number or address. Followed me to work, etc. (fortunately, I went home with my dad every day.) I had a semester abroad, and 2 weeks after getting back, he was following me again.</p> <p>So... "harmless" flirting in my experience makes me a heart breaker, with 55 year olds thinking we're gonna get married. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29219 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 12:37:26 +0000 Lozza 29219@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You know, when I think of traditional definitions of "flirting"- I don't think my husband and I do that with anyone, including each other! Both of us have lots of friends of the opposite sex, including close friends at work with whom we talk about plenty of personal stuff... but the relationships are more sibling-like, without any of the coy teasing that I typically associate with "flirting."<br /> I'm a jealous harpy, so it's a good thing DH isn't a flirt. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29212 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 12:25:49 +0000 chopsuey 29212@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband and I are all about having strict boundaries up when it comes to the opposite sex. Affairs don't just happen. They start.. with flirting! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29165 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 10:45:10 +0000 plantains 29165@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We both have plenty of friends of the opposite sex and we are very friendly with them, but I don't know if the banter qulifies as flirting. Either way, I don't think it is in our nature to bother with flirting with other people. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29153 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 10:06:13 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 29153@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well I understand why some people don't like it, and I completely think it's okay to "think it's wrong" but I think when both parties know it's harmless and its stupid flirting (as in, ridiculous and funny) then I think it's fine. I never flirt with strangers. EVER. And my husband knows my "work husband" and I know his coworkers too. </p> <p>Sure it can eventually cross a line if it's more than innocent flirting, but I trust my husband and myself to never let it go that far. Maybe the fact that we flirt with "sister like or brother like" co-workers we KNOW it would never go anyway. Even if we were the last 2 people on the planet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29133 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 09:40:41 +0000 Mrsbells 29133@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I dont see the point of flirting with other people since I am married, so I voted No its not ok </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29122 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 09:28:48 +0000 mrsjyw 29122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think that innocent flirting is part of conversation between male/female coworkers.</p> <p>DH is a bank manager and his employees are females and many of his customers are females. There is definitely a "salesy" flirting that I think comes naturally in the business of customer service/retail banking. </p> <p>I work in a corporate office, and there's always playful banter between my male coworkers (all married) and I, but to call it full on flirting? No way.</p> <p>At my last job, I had a work husband who is great friends with DH. Again - playful banter/innocent flirting - he's a close friend and like a brother to me. </p> <p>Again - my take is that it's all a natural part of human interaction. What is a NONO in my book, is intentional flirting. That's what leads to trouble! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29118 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 09:24:47 +0000 yoursilverlining 29118@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband works with many other women, and is very close friends with one woman especially – and I know they talk about *everything* (very personal stuff included). I’m fine with that, and don’t see that as flirting. My husband’s best friend is also a woman, so clearly, I don’t get jealous easily.</p> <p>I work with mostly men, and most of my friends are men, but I don’t feel that we “flirt”. We are open, talk about personal subjects, banter back and forth and give each other “the business”, but I don’t see that as flirting. Others probably would.</p> <p>I think its important to have opposite sex friends. I also think its important to acknowledge when you find other people attractive; or when/if you find yourself flirting. I don’t think there is anything wrong with flirting, as long as you are still drawing boundary lines. Seems like normal behavior to me, you just need to know not to act on it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29109 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 09:15:54 +0000 TJBee 29109@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I have a rule, we won't say or do anything to someone else that we wouldn't say or do in front of eachother. That being the case, we are both outgoing and work in very service-oriented fields. He's in sales, I'm in client services, and there are times that harmless flirting goes a long way. BUT, anything I say to my clients I would say in front of DH in a heartbeat and he wouldn't think twice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29102 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 08:54:51 +0000 Maysprout 29102@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't really like it. In my last job I worked with mainly men and we'd have to drive 40 minutes out to different sites so obviously we had a lot of 1-on-1 time to talk. In my head my rules were don't say anything about spouse except for positive things, talking to someone of the opposite sex about relationship problems, even just minor silly ones, is just a recipe for disaster IMO. Don't talk about sex life, its just not their business and no flirting with the eyes or extra touching or anything. My husband works around a lot of women and I'm glad he has the same rules. When he first started working there were a couple women that were flirting in their mannerisms, it just seemed so disrespectful that they thought it was OK to do when I was around. I really like the girls now, it took a few weeks of my husband talking about our great life together but now they talk to us like friends instead of like they're about to pounce if there's ever any trouble. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29100 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 08:38:25 +0000 owlmom 29100@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's not really either of our personalities to flirt with others, and we both prefer it that way. We both have good opposite-sex work friends though. When it comes to flirting, I think there's a very fine line between harmless and unacceptable. I used to travel a lot for work, and I've seen quite a bit of what started as harmless flirting becoming something more when people are on the road for extended periods of time. But if you can keep it meaningless, and both parties are comfortable with it, more power to you :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29089 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 08:21:49 +0000 mrbee 29089@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I prefer strong boundaries. But I respect if other couples choose to set the lines elsewhere, as long as both are ok with it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29086 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 08:18:10 +0000 Rubies 29086@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't know if this classifies as flirting but I joke and kid around a lot with my male colleagues. I think mild flirting is okay - it all depends where your heart is. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29085 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 08:16:39 +0000 heffalump 29085@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not ok with it. My hubby has plenty of female friends at work and that's fine. But they don't flirt. They talk about their babies. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29084 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 08:09:39 +0000 mediagirl 29084@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think flirting is ok. You never know where it could lead. I have guy friends at work and he has woman friends but we do not flirt. I just think it's dangerous. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29076 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 07:58:51 +0000 MrsBrewer 29076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope, I don't think it's right at all. I think flirting belongs in the marriage only </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29075 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 07:58:22 +0000 looch 29075@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've always had a work husband when I was employed...not that we flirt or anything, but just that we spend sooo much time together, more than with our SO's that we know everything that's going on in each other's lives. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29069 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 07:19:55 +0000 Beyond2 29069@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband and I have a very open relationship and tell each other everything. We flirt and neither has any problem with it at all. In previous relationships I've been jealous, but I have 0 jealous feelings when it comes to my husband. I love that about our relationship! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29066 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 07:00:10 +0000 dc yoga bee 29066@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Um, guys try to flirt with me all the time in the courtroom. From the defendants I'm trying to prosecute, to the cops. It's ALWAYS the cops I'm working with. While some of them are cute, I don't flirt back because my FI is soo conservative, and I know he wouldn't like it. My FI is always shy around people, but he has such a gorgeous smile I'm sure women think of it as an invitation to flirt. Hell, I did! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29061 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 03:18:59 +0000 Mrs. Pickle 29061@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband flirts with some of the ladies at his work. They are all twice his age though. It doesn't bother me at all because I know it is harmless. The ladies operate the machinery that my husband is in charge of and it can be stressful. So the teasing and flirting lightens up the environment. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29051 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 00:27:25 +0000 tequiero21 29051@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>eh~ i don't think any form of flirting is acceptable. luckily, my husband isn't really the "flirting" type. he jokes around with the ladies (his office staff is all ladies) but i know he'd never "go there" with them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29050 Wed, 07 Dec 2011 00:11:57 +0000 Mrs. Armbender 29050@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I call the timekeeper at DHs job his work wife, they flirt all the time and I know her (She is stunning and young) and totally ok with it. I also have a guy that was at my work that he called my other boyfriend. Like you, we are open and honest and we have full confidence in our relationship and full trust, so it is really a non issue for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29036 Tue, 06 Dec 2011 22:42:23 +0000 junebugmama 29036@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're on the same page as you I think. Innocent flirting is ok and doesn't bother either of us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-it-okay-to-flirt-at-work-when-everyone-knows-your-married#post-29032 Tue, 06 Dec 2011 22:32:20 +0000 cyndistar3 29032@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am a SAHM and my husband is a construction worker (no girls) so if either one of us were flirting it would be a problem hahaha. But in all seriousness, I really don't like flirting. </p>