https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 04 May 2026 13:25:52 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating/page/2#post-243452 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 12:42:23 +0000 birdofafeather 243452@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Scabs: thanks for sharing. i'm interested to read more about your story. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating/page/2#post-243368 Wed, 01 Aug 2012 12:04:46 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 243368@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Scabs: Wow, I can't believe you are responding to my thread. I actually started reading your blog a couple of days ago and I'm far from getting through it all, but it's rather fascinating to me. (it inspired me to ask this question)</p> <p>I agree, there's a whole other part to porn then just the usage of it. (I just finished watching that video of that porn star) it's kinda scary when you think about it. I wonder what everyone thinks about strip clubs. hmm, I might have to ask that Q. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating/page/2#post-241434 Mon, 30 Jul 2012 22:38:23 +0000 Mrs. Scabs 241434@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hello all you adorable Bee's! </p> <p>I couldn't help but notice some new traffic to my blog from your site...I love it when these discussions spill over into circles of women who haven't been hurt by pornography! </p> <p>I also love to crash a good party so hope you don't mind I invited myself to join you! and of course I have to weigh in on this issue....</p> <p>Lying in bed this morning i asked mr scabs if he thought looking at pornography was cheating. Without a second thought he said, "yes." Then he thought about it and said, "no, but it's a sneaky way to build a wedge between a couple."</p> <p>I agree, I wouldn't call it cheating. For years I accepted porn as normal and ok. mr scabs wasn't a binge porn viewer. He looked once in awhile, for a few minutes and then rubbed on out. I had no idea the claws pornography was digging into his brain and heart. It destroyed his ability for emotional and sexual intimacy. For real love. </p> <p>But there is another side to porn that really gets me. It's the abuse, exploitation and use of people. It takes advantage of women, men, children, sex-trafficked teens, the curious, the hungry and poor, the addict, homosexuals, the lonely... Its a perfect tool for the abuser and molester. Its a industry built around coarseness. Some of the worst, most graphic and disturbing information about porn I have read are the interviews of former "porn stars" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating/page/2#post-241325 Mon, 30 Jul 2012 20:50:09 +0000 photojane 241325@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunglasses: regarding the blog-- this is actually more common than many people know. i went to a christian college, and we had an event/workshop where a bunch of guys came and explained their struggle with porn and how it turned into way more than they ever thought it would, and how it ruined their marriages (and in some respects, their lives). they were super brave to admit this in front of so many people. it definitely put things into perspective for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating/page/2#post-241321 Mon, 30 Jul 2012 20:45:48 +0000 MrsTiz 241321@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would be VERY offput if DH was watching porn, seeing as how i'm always here and am avaliable haha. Once every great now and then? Whatever, but if he was watching it daily, or even weekly we would have issues. I voted NO to actual cheating though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240932 Mon, 30 Jul 2012 13:27:21 +0000 mrskc 240932@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't consider it cheating. My DH watches it and it's no secret to me that he does. As long as it doesn't interfere with our intimacy or marriage, I'm ok with it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240889 Mon, 30 Jul 2012 12:58:53 +0000 BSB 240889@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't consider it cheating, either. The DH is an artist so he has drawn some sketches from nude models. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240888 Mon, 30 Jul 2012 12:58:16 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 240888@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsbells: I'm okay with porn watching but if it's done without my knowing or denies it, then yes it can become a problem.<br /> Unfortunately theres a blog <a href="http://eatmyscabs.blogspot.com" rel="nofollow">http://eatmyscabs.blogspot.com</a> where her husband cheated on her (sex-addiction) and it all started with porn. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240877 Mon, 30 Jul 2012 12:50:57 +0000 littlebug 240877@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't consider it cheating, but that's not to say it wouldn't bother me. I would feel inadequate. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240814 Mon, 30 Jul 2012 11:56:38 +0000 Mrsbells 240814@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It depends. if its something that he does in hiding and spends money on it and is out of control then it would be cheating since he feels the need to hide it </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240811 Mon, 30 Jul 2012 11:54:57 +0000 birdofafeather 240811@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i don't consider it cheating, but it's something that DH has struggled with and we're working through now. because of what we belief, it violates the marriage vows we made to each other. he starts to put it before me and our intimacy, so that's not okay or healthy for our marriage. i still don't consider it cheating though because there is not another party involved. while it does effect DH a lot and myself, it would be a whole other issue someone was involved. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240338 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 21:49:20 +0000 Grace 240338@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It wouldn't be cheating for me with my husband. It wouldn't bother me if he watched porn (unless it became all the time). But, I think it would be cheating if I had asked him not to. Because then it would be disregarding something that I thought was important. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240333 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 21:43:54 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 240333@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sorrycharlie: I completely agree with you. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240332 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 21:42:26 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 240332@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@photojane: thank you for your honest opinion. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240137 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 17:50:36 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 240137@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I fully believe it violates the sanctity of our marriage and I think it is a moral taboo (it's a grey area for me). Both DH and I agree that we would never do it. I don't consider it cheating though--cheating is blatantly wrong. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240132 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 17:40:30 +0000 eeh 240132@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't categorize porn as cheating but I would definitely consider it harmful to a marriage. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240125 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 17:14:24 +0000 mrsjyw 240125@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Same belief as you, I don't think it's cheating, as long as the couple are on the same page about it, I don't think it's an issue at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240122 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 17:10:12 +0000 Mrs. Pen 240122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@photojane: @MrsSPB: LOVE both your posts. I totally echo what you both said.</p> <p>ETA from my original post: I did post yes because I do think it can escalate to that level. </p> <p>Since DH and I have both agreed that it is something that will not happen in our marriage, we want to keep our eyes and minds pure for only each other- I guess I would be very hurt and perhaps feel "emotionally" cheated on if he was viewing it, enjoying it and fantasizing about other women.</p> <p>Like another PP said, I feel bad enough about my body- to know that he's watching those type of women would additionally make me not even want to be intimate with him at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240117 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 17:04:37 +0000 sorrycharlie 240117@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@FutureMrsMcK: this. I totally agree with your entire post!</p> <p>I have to say, the only time I've been upset with DH for watching it was because he kept asking me to try something I was uncomfortable with (anal). He knew the back story as to why that particular act was so upsetting to me (assault) and continued to ask - he eventually stopped asking, but I found out that he was watching that on porn, and I felt totally..offended, I guess? We talked it out (he was just curious and I took it way too personal) but aside from that, it's never really gotten in the way.</p> <p>To be completely honest..I've gotten off without him before and I am fully aware he masturbates, so it doesn't really bug me. Like PPs have said, only if it entirely replaced me..i.e., he was telling me "not in the mood" and then turning to porn instead. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240106 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 16:45:05 +0000 lovehoneybee 240106@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't consider it cheating. Related, it doesn't bother me at all, and won't as long as it doesn't negatively affect our sex life (i.e he'd rather watch it and jerk off than get some loving from me when I'm home and willing). We watch it together sometimes, and I watch it alone sometimes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240105 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 16:44:36 +0000 cyndistar3 240105@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@photojane: &lt;---- what she said! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240103 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 16:41:22 +0000 photojane 240103@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsSPB: same, same.</p> <p>i (unashamedly) voted yes. our religious beliefs play a big role in this. to us, our marriage was a covenant before God, and is a promise of a physical, emotional, psychological, and emotional intimacy between just the two of us. is it forgivable? yes. but it would require time and work. especially if it were a long-time continued, secret behavior. i honestly have zero desire to watch porn, but hubs believes the same thing -- if i were to watch it, i would be cheating. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240097 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 16:35:40 +0000 Sweet T 240097@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted yes even though I don't think it's always cheating. I should have voted for "other."</p> <p>I think it's cheating if it's being hidden or lied about. I also think it's cheating if it's being used to replace intimacy in the relationship. I read a few pages of that blog and it really made me want to stay away from porn. It's heartbreaking to read what she's going through and that it started with "just porn." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240091 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 16:25:54 +0000 HLK208 240091@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No...but I'm honestly uncomfortable with it. I don't want to fantisize about other men and I would prefer that my husband doesn't fantasize about other women. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240085 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 16:21:14 +0000 LuLu Mom 240085@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No unless it becomes an addiction and other issues arise. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240070 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 15:57:21 +0000 Adira 240070@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Modern Daisy: I agree with you completely! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-240047 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 15:05:19 +0000 Modern Daisy 240047@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope! I actually think it can be a good thing for a relationship. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-239985 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 12:42:05 +0000 Boogs 239985@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I could see how it would be considered emotional cheating if it was done in secret and done continuously after your SO asked you to not do it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-239952 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 11:46:30 +0000 Mrs.B 239952@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have a problem with it as long as DH and I are viewing it together. With that said that has only happened maybe 3 times in our entire relationship. DH does not view porn without me and has no desire to. If he did view it without me knowing then yes it would probably bother me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-pornography-considered-cheating#post-239935 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 11:23:35 +0000 chopsuey 239935@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsSPB: I like your definition of cheating! :) </p>