https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 09 Jun 2026 05:04:49 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject/page/2#post-1521297 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 21:13:39 +0000 MrsTiz 1521297@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@scg00387: oh I absolutley didn't mean you in particular but yep that's the thread! I don't know if I am being too sensitive but that thread made me soo mad. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject/page/2#post-1521296 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 21:11:14 +0000 Elderberrygin 1521296@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: I'm using "Its not her strongest category" in reply to all sleep questions from now on. I seriously LOL'd at that. </p> <p>I also hated "Is she a good baby?" and I especially hated the couple with a toddler who said told us to treasure every moment of the newborn phase because it just got harder and harder. Sobbed the entire way home after hearing that. Now I have a toddler and as far as I'm concerned that was the biggest lie since "Treasure every moment of high school, these are the best days of your life." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject/page/2#post-1521274 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 20:58:43 +0000 Chocoholic 1521274@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't say it's a touchy subject, more annoying than anything. And I'm thinking it shouldn't annoy me because DS has been a great sleeper so far (almost 3 months). For whatever reason I get annoyed when people ask. Probaly because I've been asked over a dozen times, I also wonder where the conversation would lead if DS was not sleeping well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject/page/2#post-1521242 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 20:43:41 +0000 Grace 1521242@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>At the beginning, I don't think it's touchy, because no one expects a newborn to sleep well. My LO is now 6 months and wakes 1-2 a night. Every time I get shocked expressions which makes me doubt myself, even though I've read many times that it's normal for the age. But when I doubt myself, I get defensive. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1521217 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 20:31:46 +0000 citymouse 1521217@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: Share it happily!!! That is awesome about your babe sleeping well. Im rooting for ya!! :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1521181 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 20:13:41 +0000 birdofafeather 1521181@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i think it can be and every kid is SO different! i get annoyed for other friends whose kids are terrible sleepers. mine was pretty good or maybe i just rolled with it better? she didn't STTN consistently (like maybe 10 times total) until we sleep trained at 13 months. i was fine with her wake ups until i wasn't anymore, if that makes sense? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1521157 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 20:05:43 +0000 deerylou 1521157@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't say there's a single subject regarding baby that is particularly off limits for me, personally. However, unsolicited and judgemental advice is rarely appreciated. Some people have actually seemed rather offended when they find out we bed share. I just kind of chuckle and shrug it off. I'm sorry our private sleeping arrangements bother you, on an intimate level? Hah. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1521140 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 19:58:08 +0000 regberadaisy 1521140@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: not for me! I accepted long ago my daughter is a crap sleeper! haha although it's much better now. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1521132 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 19:54:02 +0000 Jewel664 1521132@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Absolutely annoying. I get so many people trying to offer advice bc my soon to be 7 month old LO is still not sleeping through the night. I also try not to gloat when we have a great night of sleep either. I never ask a new parent about baby sleep. My stupid neighbor asks every day and then proceeds to tell me about her kids sleep when they were younger. I feel like saying that was a million years ago!! Touchy subject for me for sure!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1521117 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 19:49:17 +0000 Sammyfab 1521117@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@scg00387: i completely agree! You'll see a trend in the responses in this thread...those with good sleepers say they don't mind being asked about sleep. Those with not-as-great sleepers find the questions annoying. Shocker :wink: .</p> <p>My LO wasn't a sleepy newborn either but he has always been a decent night sleeper (not the best and not the worst). Since becoming a mom, I've made a conscious effort to:</p> <p>1) never ask specifically about sleep<br /> 2) not offer advice about sleep unless asked<br /> 3) not sound braggy about my LO's sleep if another mom asks me about it </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1521009 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 18:58:08 +0000 junebugmama 1521009@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: It is such a shitty question. J2 was needy and it was exhausting and that question was just a reminder that I wasn't enjoying it all of the time, like everyone expected me to. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520965 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 18:34:27 +0000 immabeetoo 1520965@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsTiz: I don't know if you're referencing my response, or if I'm thinking of the same post, but if it's the one I'm thinking of, Moms saying "OH I just plopped him in the bouncer and showered/did whatever" were a big part of why I had such a hard time coming to terms with my LO's crappy newborn sleep, and that it didn't have anything to do with me and how I was handling it. Which is why I wanted to point out that not everyone's kid sleeps like that! In case any preggos were reading, with unsleepy babies in their bellies :wink: </p> <p>It's just an annoying question if your baby isn't sleeping well, I think. If you're sleep deprived, that is all you can think about (or at least all I could think about) so to have someone ask on top of it is just frustrating. I totally get that it is an innocent question, but when you're used to hearing it followed up with unsolicited advice or opinion on how their sleep should be at that age, or how their kid's sleep was at that age, it becomes a knee-jerk kind of thing, I think.</p> <p>Once his sleep WAS getting good, then I just felt guilty telling someone who was asking, when I knew their LO's sleep wasn't what they wanted.</p> <p>As someone who never had a sleepy newborn, I never ask about another baby's sleep. I pretty much don't ask anything other than "How are you two doing!" and "Can I do anything for you?"</p> <p>@Foodnerd81: your last sentence made me LOL. Any time I see a baby blissfully sleeping in a wrap or a stroller I STILL get a twinge of envy, which is crazy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520656 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 15:40:40 +0000 Foodnerd81 1520656@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes and no. C wasn't/isn't the worst sleeper in the world, but it's not her strongest category. When it was at its worst, I just said things like, "It's a work in progress". What actually annoyed me the most was when she was being normal for her age (say, 1 wake up a night at 5 months or something) and I'd be like, Oh, it's not bad, she just wakes up once to eat, and people get all pitying, like, you poor thing. I know people are just making conversation. </p> <p>@junebugmama: At one of my lowest points, random stranger on the street asked me if she was a good baby (while I'm wearing her in the moby and pushing the stroller, because she freaked out in the stroller that was supposed to be getting her to sleep). I couldn't even bring myself to smile and say yes-- I think I might have cried a tiny bit and said something like, well, we love her... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520620 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 15:21:31 +0000 2PeasinaPod 1520620@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It wasn't touchy for me, but I was pretty exasperated with LO's sleeping and was willing to try anything at one point. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520619 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 15:21:19 +0000 catlady 1520619@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it's a touchy subject for me with certain people. Some people we know basically ask every single time we talk to them, and I'm just sick of it. Whatever our response is, they always act like she's a bad sleeper and they are sooo sorry for us. I don't want them to be sorry for us, I just want them to stop asking about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520591 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 15:13:33 +0000 cmomma17 1520591@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It was touchy for me only because people would say things like "Wow, your baby isn't sleeping through the night yet?" as if something were wrong with my baby. Not all babies sleep through the night on the same timeline! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520529 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:56:55 +0000 Mrs. Oatmeal 1520529@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think its a pretty typical question - there's not much else for people to ask about. That being said, people often ask me why she isn't STTN (at 7 months), and I feel like saying "If I knew, don't you think I'd be making it happen?" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520505 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:50:50 +0000 Boheme 1520505@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Its totally a touchy subject for me. We were in sleep hell for like, 7.5 months straight, and I hated all the unsolicited advice about sleep training etc etc. We have a neighbor that I avoid to this day because she always asks me about working and sleep, and follows it up with humblebrags about how she's soooo lucky her perfect children are perfect sleepers and that she doesn't work. Go kick rocks, lady. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520438 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:37:47 +0000 Dandelion 1520438@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@honeybear: Yep, this is what I was going to say. The question is usually followed by some unsolicited advice that the person thinks they're the first person to tell you about. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520414 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:31:30 +0000 artsyfartsy 1520414@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I get kind of annoyed that people keep asking me if he's STTN yet. He's 4 weeks old. Of course not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520325 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 14:03:33 +0000 PurplePeony 1520325@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It hasn't been touchy for us so far, even though she was a terrible sleeper for the first 8 weeks and now is going through the 4-month regression (FML...). Maybe I have sensitive friends/acquaintances, or maybe I just don't care what they think about her sleep? Dunno. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1520089 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 13:05:17 +0000 wonderstruck 1520089@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We got lucky and have an amazing sleeper, so usually when I get this question it's from other moms who want to commiserate with me, and they don't always respond very nicely despite the fact that they're the one who asked! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1519827 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 11:45:25 +0000 junebugmama 1519827@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't care about the sleeping question. However, I do hate when people ask "is he a good baby?" referring to sleeping and eating. As if there are "bad babies" oy</p> <p>When people ask me though, I just always replied that his sleep pattern was normal for that of a breastfed baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1519821 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 11:43:07 +0000 MrsTiz 1519821@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah absolutely. Not for me, but i've been fortunate enough to have a good sleeper who only has rough days/nights every now and then. I was commenting in a post the other day and was getting shitty attitudes because "not everyone's babies sleep like that" "hope my next baby is like yours" etc.. I don't get offended when people ask about LO's sleep and I don't think it's rude to ask other parents (especially with LO's close in age to my own) about their babies sleep. I truly believe moms take it too personally. If your baby doesn't sleep IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! Some babies do, some babies don't! I think that is what causes most of the "touchyness"...is parents thinking it reflects on them or their parenting styles. Which 99.9% of the time, it doesn't.</p> <p>But, it's parenting. Everything you ask, no matter how innocent is a touchy subject to someone out there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1519643 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 10:54:19 +0000 Turd Ferguson 1519643@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For us it kind of is. LO is 4.5 months and sleeping horribly, so the majority of the time, when we get asked about sleep, it's usually in the, "Well every other baby seems to be sleeping through the night by now..." </p> <p>I automatically get defensive...and jealous. :/ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1519614 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 10:47:24 +0000 mrsjyw 1519614@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's not a touchy subject, but it is def a common question that we got all the time after we had DS. I think it's just generally a topic that most people (parents and non) associate with having a baby so they ask immediately if you're getting any (or not).</p> <p>I've had a good sleeper since 3 months+ and we get the "yea right" look from ppl who don't believe us. And others who say that they've had the same experience as us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1519375 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 09:56:49 +0000 Madison43 1519375@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Depends. My baby just went through a rough patch with nighttime sleep after a stomach bug/ 4 month regression and I got pretty annoyed after a while with the daily "have you tried XYZ..." from my mom and mil. I'm sure it was all well meaning, but when I am super sleep deprived myself, I just can't keep having that conversation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1519357 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 09:50:25 +0000 Zbug 1519357@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's only touchy for me when it's followed by "you should really sleep train." Our family has decided that sleep training, at least at this age, isn't for us, so it's annoying to constantly hear that my child would sleep if I just let her CIO. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1519356 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 09:49:57 +0000 blackbird 1519356@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No? I think it's a common question. People usually want to sympathize with you, let you know it'll get better, or throw stones at you for the good luck. I ask other parents this and they ask me! </p> <p>I mean, we are talking about, typically, the biggest "issue" with new babies! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-sleep-a-touchy-subject#post-1519345 Tue, 25 Mar 2014 09:45:47 +0000 TemperanceBrennan 1519345@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think a lot of times it is mentioned because a new baby is the complete focus of new parents, but all they do is eat, sleep, and poop. It's hard to make conversation. Most people don't want to talk about poop, so after asking how the mother is feeling and how the baby is doing, most conversations turn to sleep. I do think people should be more considerate when asking questions and offering advice! </p>