https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 19 Jul 2026 19:59:22 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-322851 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 14:58:19 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 322851@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With this definition - Wikipedia defines it as "The American Dream is a national ethos of the United States; a set of ideals in which freedom includes the opportunity for prosperity and success, and an upward social mobility achieved through hard work."</p> <p>I would say in many ways, the American Dream does not truly exist for many Americans. I don't think there's always a direct correlation between hard work and success. I think many many people in the lower socio-economic levels work extremely hard, grueling jobs but are still barely living paycheck to paycheck without ever getting a foot up, whereas a lot of the rich know how to "make" their money work from them without having to lift a finger (through smart investments, etc.). However, you need excess, expendable income to actually make investments in the first place. If you're barely scraping by to make ends meet, it would be very difficult to make your money work for you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-322824 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 14:42:50 +0000 JerricaBenton 322824@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I really don't think it is. My husband started a business that has thrived and grown every single year despite the worst economy we've seen in our lifetime (and we come in contact with a lot of people in similar situations). I think it may not be as 'easy' as it's been in the past to have and achieve everything you want but it's far from impossible. </p> <p>3 out of 4 of our parents are children of immigrants and my husband's parents started a business and it thrived and supported a big family, and my father is a professional who works for himself and did the same thing and now we're doing it too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-322554 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 13:32:58 +0000 SugarplumsMom 322554@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Firt off, I have to say that I believe in the American dream. Although I live abroad, I still think that American is the Land of Opportunity. A friend of mine from Africa summed it up by saying, "in Sweden you can never be rich and in America you can". Although I don't believe in saying never, I agree with his statement. </p> <p>My parents are first gen immigrants and like countless others, they worked their way to "success". I totally believe that with hard work and a vision, the opportunities are limitless! But with success, there is (often times) the need for more.</p> <p>I don't believe the American dream is dead or unattainable, but I do think that the mentality of always wanting something better can screw with people's perception of happiness and success. </p> <p>I think the guy that wrote that mixed up 2 different concepts as one. (BTW, there was no other explanation to that quote, no context, so you can interpret it as you want.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-322198 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 11:27:14 +0000 Meridian 322198@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: Touche... you are absolutely right, haha! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-322172 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 11:20:56 +0000 mrbee 322172@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sweetchic: A first generation immigrant slightly disappointed in his children? It would actually be amazing if that wasn't the case!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-322149 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 11:15:43 +0000 mediagirl 322149@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>To me the American Dream is to be able to work hard to achieve long-term goals. Both of my husband's and my parents were able to achieve these goals. They both came from poor families but they both worked hard to live a good life, raise two good kids and were able to retire in their 50's.</p> <p>My husband and I both know that we will not be able to achieve the same dream our parents had. It is our dream to work hard, get ahead, provide a good life for our daughter and be able to retire someday. At this point, unfortunately, it is just a dream for us. We work hard, provide a good life for ourselves and our lo but we're not sure we will ever be able to retire. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-322107 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 10:59:00 +0000 Meridian 322107@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had a conversation with my dad a few months ago about a similar topic. He feels that in America, kids have the opportunity to do better (financially and career-wise) than their parents. He was saying how his generation (first gen immigrants from Taiwan) were for the most pretty successful, and that he thinks their kids should be MORE successful. I think he was slightly implying that he was disappointed that WE were not more successful than him. He is a dermatologist with his own private practice and lives a nice lifestyle. </p> <p>No matter how hard we work, I'm not sure DH and I will ever be able to match that... I have my own business, but not sure if I'll ever make enough money to truly be financially well-off! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321902 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:34:50 +0000 ladyfingers 321902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I see the American Dream not as unattainable by some substance or component that America lacks, but as innately unrealistic given our economic structure. I don't think the Dream is dead -- I think it's simply never been realistic. I always defined the American Dream as, you can achieve anything as long as you put your mind to it. Many people define it as financial comfort (not going paycheck to paycheck, not ever worrying about how to pay the bills, not having to sacrifice one thing to have an obligation), owning assets (cars, houses, savings), etc. </p> <p>Unfortunately, I think that there are a whole slew of occupations where you can work your ass off and never enjoy this Dream, and a small subset of fields that you'd better track yourself into if you want to achieve it.</p> <p>Which is why it's important to define and reach for your own dream, and not try to achieve some fantastical myth that is essentially a byproduct of mid-20th century propaganda.</p> <p>I don't think it's a reason not to move to America, though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321895 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:29:37 +0000 Adira 321895@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bpaig: I agree with everything you said, 100%! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321893 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:29:06 +0000 prettylizy 321893@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like to think of the American Dream (or North American dream, since I'm Canadian and honing in on your thing) as a more abstract thing. It's the freedom to create your own dream life, whatever that may be. For one person, the American Dream might be owning a house instead of renting. For another, the Dream might be giving up a corporate lifestyle and paycheque to make a difference for the little guy. Someone else might Dream of being their own boss, or being able to support their parents when they grow older, or getting a post secondary degree. That's the whole point, we get to decide what we want and work to attain it. I feel like I'm living the dream, and DH and I aren't super wealthy and don't have every little bell and whistle we could ever imagine, but we're exactly where we've always dreamed of being. </p> <p>*gets off soapbox* </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321892 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:27:48 +0000 Mrsbells 321892@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pelikila: I agree it depends on how you define "American<br /> Dream"</p> <p>In my opinion the americna dream is that you can start out with nothing and end up being very successful and wealthy. I also agree that while it is the case for some people, many people fail to realize that not everyone starts out with the same opportunities. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321887 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:26:45 +0000 mrsjazz 321887@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it depends on how you define the American dream. I don't think it's about materialism, but some people may see the dream as being able to buy more stuff. If the dream is being able to own a home in a safe neighborhood, equal opportunities and access to things like good schools for your children &amp; health care, and having a good (hopefully satisfying) job--then I don't think it's attainable by many, many people and it has nothing to do with materialism. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321884 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:24:45 +0000 shinystraps 321884@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think the American Dream (as defined above: the opportunity for prosperity and success, and an upward social mobility achieved through hard work) is attainable. </p> <p>I DON'T think it's possible to have the huge house, the nice car, the expensive vacations, and all the other things that people seem to think the American Dream entitles them to on most people's income/willingness to work. For example, I have been offered opportunities to make more money but it would mean a lot less time with my family. I chose time with my family. That means we have a house that we love, but it's no mansion. And 4 and 10 year old cars instead of brand new ones. But am I achieving the opportunity for success, prosperity and upward social mobility through hard work? You betcha. </p> <p>I heard something on the radio this week, that most couples try to attain the same standard of living in their first 7 years of marriage that it took their parents 30+ years to reach. I think that's very true. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321867 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:19:09 +0000 mrs. wagon 321867@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is an interesting point.</p> <p>My parents came to America right after they got married with no money and only a student visa for my dad to go to school here. He achieved what I consider the American Dream by the time I was in college: well over six figure salary in a large corporation, 3000 sq ft custom built house in a good suburb, two nice cars, two kids in good colleges. Even though it all came crashing down when he got laid off a few years later, and he's basically given all of his financial future to his kids for down payments, I still think he achieved the American Dream. He'll never be rich and "completely comfortable" (as humans we're never totally satisfied!) but he's comfortable enough and, as long as Social Security doesn't fall apart, he'll have enough after he retires. And he's provided for his children. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321866 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:18:55 +0000 tororojo 321866@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree that if your goal is to accumulate enough wealth/stuff to make yourself satisfied with life, you'll never accumulate enough--I firmly believe that money doesn't buy happiness. I think lots of people have a constant thirst for more, not just Americans. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321863 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:18:15 +0000 loveisstrange 321863@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wikipedia defines it as "The American Dream is a national ethos of the United States; a set of ideals in which freedom includes the opportunity for prosperity and success, and an upward social mobility achieved through hard work."</p> <p>Is that what we are looking at?</p> <p>I would agree with @mrbee: I don't think the american dream (by the definition above) is unattainable but I think it has gotten harder and harder to achieve. I think that the generations are getting progressively more lazy, complacent and entitled and are expecting their success to be handed to them rather than having to work for it and I think that those who do want to work are having a hard time because of recession, the gap in the social classes, the job market, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321861 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:17:56 +0000 yoursilverlining 321861@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I do think the “American Dream” is unattainable for many, many people; but not because of materialism. The “American Dream” often assumes that everyone has equal opportunity to succeed; which just isn’t true. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321860 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:17:25 +0000 heffalump 321860@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think that generalizes Americans. </p> <p>I'm a sahm, obviously not out for money. I have my masters in art therapy, a degree that does not pay well but is in the helping people field. Dh works as a computer programmer for a non profit company. He could make more if he switched to a different company ..... but he likes working for non profit. It makes him feel good about what he does. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321856 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:15:41 +0000 Mrs. Cat in the Cradle 321856@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think there are very deep and troubling problems, but it isn't centered on materialism. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321852 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:13:50 +0000 pelikila 321852@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it really depends on what you think the American Dream is. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321849 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:11:27 +0000 hilsy85 321849@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well, how are you (or this writer) defining the American Dream? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321848 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:11:24 +0000 mrbee 321848@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The American dream is facing growing pains, but it's not because of materialism! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-the-american-dream-unachievable#post-321840 Wed, 03 Oct 2012 09:08:51 +0000 SugarplumsMom 321840@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Here's a controversial quote I found written by a guy advising someone else to not move to the USA:</p> <p><i>"America is not the land of opportunity. I know a man who achieved financial success and fulfilled his lifelong dream of having an isolated place far from human noises. He is the most miserable man I know and he spends his time buying things on eBay. The reason? It's never enough. The American dream is unachievable. No one ever acquires "enough" and then relaxes or does something to contribute to society. America is about more and more and more until there is no more to take."</i></p> <p>What are your thoughts about it? Do you think the American Dream is unattainable? Do Americans have an unquenchable thirst for "more"? </p>