https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 11 Apr 2026 02:44:26 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2312231 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 23:51:52 +0000 lamariniere 2312231@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@meredithNYC: agree with this! </p> <p>I also felt really uncomfortable with the idea of a shower but several of my friends insisted on hosting one. I think most people want to celebrate the new baby and congratulate you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2312199 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 22:15:57 +0000 DesertDreams88 2312199@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Since I think baby showers aren't about gifts, they're about celebrating a new life, I'd be totally psyched to be able to go to one of my long distance friends' showers! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2312112 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 19:34:46 +0000 Anya 2312112@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think if you are the type of person who is conscientious enough to ask this question, and these are your buds and would know that about you, then you have nothing to worry about :happy: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2312108 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 19:26:59 +0000 MrsSRS 2312108@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would just tell my friends that there is a chance the shower may end up the same weekend they are in town! But I'm kind of a lay it all out sort of person. But then they know it isn't set or being planned around wanting more gifts from more attendees! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2312047 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 17:40:32 +0000 Torchwood 2312047@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it's a friend close enough they'd be traveling just to visit me, I would assume they'd be getting a gift anyway. So it wouldn't even occur to me that it could look gift grabby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311965 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 15:31:29 +0000 Reese 2311965@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: I think if your friends are making a long distance trip to see you, they care enough to want to be at your shower. I imagine they will bring you a gift anyway :happy: Not gift grabby </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311930 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 14:48:07 +0000 Chuckles 2311930@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think since they already said that they want to visit, it would be good to tell them that your shower might be in February, but that they are welcome to visit in December if that is easier.<br /> I actually think it would be weird if I offered to visit a pregnant friend in December and then found out after the fact that there was a shower in February. I would be like, why didn't you tell me? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311913 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 14:35:18 +0000 travellingbee 2311913@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: y'all are funny! People want to help celebrate your baby! That's what friends and family do! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311780 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 12:49:02 +0000 lemondrop 2311780@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all! I think they would love to be at your shower. Don't overthink it, there is nothing wrong with having a baby shower, give them the options and see what they say. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311763 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 12:41:10 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2311763@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@travellingbee: he's really uncomfortable with the idea of people contributing to the expenses of our child and I am not totally comfortable with the idea of my friend and mom paying for a party for me. What a fine pair we make. :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311752 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 12:33:14 +0000 dolphin 2311752@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not gift grabby at all. I would love it if my visit was the same time as the shower! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311750 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 12:32:23 +0000 My Only Sunshine 2311750@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: They probably want to come! My good friend scheduled her entire baby shower around when I could come to town and I was so touched. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311740 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 12:12:49 +0000 misolee 2311740@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As a friend, I would think it's great that the baby shower coincided with the visit! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311728 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 11:52:15 +0000 meredithNYC 2311728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think it's gift-grabby at all - more an opportunity for close friends to be involved in a special day they might not otherwise be able to attend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311717 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 11:38:14 +0000 travellingbee 2311717@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not even slightly gift grabby. And your DH doesn't want you to have a shower?! Yeah, my DH wouldn't get a say in that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311676 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 10:52:18 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2311676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: As an OOT guest, I would appreciate someone maybe saying, "Hey I know you spent a lot on travel and hotel, we would love to see you for the shower but please do not feel obligated to bring a gift". More than likely I would still bring something but it would be nice to acknowledge the cost I'm already paying OOP for travel. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311659 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 10:42:56 +0000 MrsH 2311659@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: I'd think they wanted me to celebrate with them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311658 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 10:42:50 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2311658@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LuLu Mom: I'm really embracing the fact that a shower is thrown for you and my commitment would just be 2-3 hours max. I think I'd still have plenty of face time with OOT guests for the rest of their (extended) weekend stay. </p> <p>@Greentea: no one said "when's your shower? I'll come then!" which is making me question bringing it up this early. </p> <p>For the most part it doesn't sound like a horrible idea, so that's good. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311647 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 10:39:52 +0000 snowjewelz 2311647@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't think you're out to get gifts.. If I am your friend (and assuming a friend worth traveling to visit), then of course I'd love to be able to attend your baby shower too and kill 2 birds with one stone! And I would've given you a gift regardless! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311612 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 10:10:15 +0000 mrbee 2311612@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like the idea of offering them an option, and also you could maybe emphasize that they don't need to bring gifts - that their presence is all you could ever ask for! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311601 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 10:00:43 +0000 littlebug 2311601@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, I actually think it's considerate. If these are good enough friends that they're willing to travel just to "see the bump," then I'd imagine they'd want to be at your shower. I would just suggest that you are thinking of having the shower in February, and would it work for them to come visit then? That way they don't have to make 2 trips (if they do want to be at the shower). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311592 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 09:50:32 +0000 LuLu Mom 2311592@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No I don't think it is gift-grabby. My only comment is if you only get to see these friends a couple times a year, I would want to maximize my time with them and would not want to have to "split" that time with a shower and socializing with all the attendees. I'm selfish in my friend time and when I get time with my girlfriends I want to enjoy it to it's fullest potential and a shower would take a whole 1/2 day away from catching up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311589 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 09:48:47 +0000 looch 2311589@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, I wouldn't think that this is gift grabby. I buy gifts when I want to, anyway, not when I am told to. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311582 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 09:44:19 +0000 Greentea 2311582@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'll be honest and say I would think that a little bit. I am not a huge baby shower person. I will add that I wouldn't think that directly- just that, "oh, Sally is having me come during her shower, I guess she wants me at her shower, now I have to deal with that and give her a gift," -at the same time they may get you something anyway and they may like showers.</p> <p>I would ask them- want to come for the party in December, or the shower in February? Give them the option. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311576 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 09:35:59 +0000 erinbaderin 2311576@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think they would be excited to be able to attend your shower! I have a few friends who live in Washington (I live in Toronto) and they actually road tripped to visit so they could come to my shower. You could also tell them that you don't want them to bring gifts and that their visit is your present, if you're worried about seeming grabby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311573 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 09:33:00 +0000 MOMTOLITTLEB 2311573@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Since these are really good friends, they would probably buy a gift for your baby anyway. I would be excited to be able to be there for the shower. I would only see a shower invitation as gift grabby if it came from someone I barely knew. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311570 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 09:31:25 +0000 sapphire 2311570@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sure your close friends would want to be at your shower and would appreciate being included! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311563 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 09:25:27 +0000 birdofafeather 2311563@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Banana330: I did the same for OOT friends. I had a friend that was actually cross country and able to coordinate being there and it meant a lot to me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311558 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 09:23:23 +0000 Banana330 2311558@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd just give them the option. Say we're having a get together on X date in Dec or if you'd rather my mom is planning to host a baby shower sometime in Feb, which ever works better for you. </p> <p>I invited my out of town friends to my baby shower but sent them a note saying if you're not already planning to be home that weekend I don't want you to go out of your way to come home for it and that we can celebrate together next time they were in town. </p> <p>Gift grabby, No i don't think so. People want to celebrate the baby and if they are close enough that they want to make a special trip to see you then they will likely be wanting to shower you and baby with gifts either way. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-gift-grabby#post-2311552 Tue, 06 Oct 2015 09:17:35 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2311552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This may be a non-issue, but I don't want to come off gift grabby.</p> <p>A few of my OOT girlfriends want to come visit when my bump is in full bloom. I have suggested they come in Dec when we are hosting a party at our house. I'll be 5.5 months at that time. Dec is terribly expensive to travel (flight +hotel) to where we live. My other thought that I haven't voiced yet is to come in February. Feb is still snow bird season and expensive to travel, but I'll be further along and definitely have a bump worth writing home about.</p> <p>The thing about February is that is most likely the month I would have a baby shower. One of my local girlfriends and my mom have both offered to throw/ co-host me a shower. I looked up the best time to have showers and it would have to be the weekend before or after Valentine's Day. My husband is still not sold on a baby shower and so that is still a big maybe.</p> <p>I really need my pals to visit at one time so I don't have to take unnecessary days off- as is I'm trying to roll over the maximum time off I can for next year. </p> <p>Here's my question- if your friend suggested planning your visit to coincide with the baby shower would you think she just wanted a gift? </p>