https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 28 Aug 2026 04:35:57 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1656350 Sat, 24 May 2014 11:31:45 +0000 Nskillet 1656350@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Here's a bold question. Are you a full figured woman? I am plus sized and have noticed recently a lot of "fit" people feeling some type of obligation to remind people of their overall health. Is she one of those boney I run daily and only eat salad types? If so I would bring it up to your manager at your next opportunity that she made you uncomfortable and didn't appreciate her wording. It could be an HR issue if she's not careful (discriminatory). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1656257 Sat, 24 May 2014 09:44:34 +0000 Greentea 1656257@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wonderstruck: yes that argument is ridiculous (re: health plan and candy that op isn't even on). She wasn't smoking in the room or drinking alcohol she brought. What next, no one is allowed to drive? They have to bike! Or take the stairs!? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1656143 Sat, 24 May 2014 07:16:59 +0000 wonderstruck 1656143@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I definitely would have called her out on that - in no way is it appropriate for your boss to comment on that. And I think that saying it might be appropriate if you're on a company health plan is BS - that's skating pretty thin ice there, what's next? Stop hiring anyone who isn't in shape, has diabetes, is in their child-bearing years, etc., because they might need more health care? </p> <p>I would probably stop by her office and say something like, "I've been thinking about what you said yesterday, and honestly it really bothers me that you repeatedly commented on my eating habits. I understand that you are just trying to express your concern, but it made me uncomfortable and I'm asking you to please refrain from making such references in the future." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655689 Fri, 23 May 2014 17:59:14 +0000 JerricaBenton 1655689@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PixieStix: lol that would be my internal monologue!</p> <p>Yeah I think it's very weird that she would say that and it would definitely bother me. There isn't really much you can do now but I do agree it's strange. This is one of those situations that I would just say nothing and stew about it later but if she says anything else I'd say something like 'what do you mean by that?' Or 'im not sure I understand why you'd mention that.' </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655595 Fri, 23 May 2014 16:43:59 +0000 PixieStix 1655595@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is one of those times where I wish social norms could go out the window and you could have responded with something to the effect of, "Your face concerns me." But, y'know.. that's my immature side talking. That's very weird that she brought it up to you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655569 Fri, 23 May 2014 16:32:32 +0000 MsLipGloss 1655569@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: to the extent that employees are covered under the same group policy , it matters to everyone (in terms of premium) how healthy their co-workers are. That being said, I don't know what this person's reason was for her comment. I am just presenting an alternative that would bring the comment within the boundaries of something business related. That is all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655564 Fri, 23 May 2014 16:29:17 +0000 ShootingStar 1655564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MsLipGloss: I still don't understand the logic of this argument. Does that mean that any employee can question what another's eating? If someone has cake or cookies can another employee call them out on it? What about the pizza lunches paid for by the company that happen several times a week? What if someone takes issue with anyone drinking the gallons of regular soda that are also provided for free? Where does it stop? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655560 Fri, 23 May 2014 16:24:46 +0000 MsLipGloss 1655560@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: it doesn't matter who provides the candy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655546 Fri, 23 May 2014 16:13:29 +0000 MsLipGloss 1655546@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: that's why I wrote "to the extent" . . . in case you weren't. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655542 Fri, 23 May 2014 16:11:22 +0000 Greentea 1655542@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: that argument can't be concluded from you eating candy that was provided! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655538 Fri, 23 May 2014 16:09:09 +0000 ShootingStar 1655538@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MsLipGloss: Um, considering I'm not on the company plan that argument's not valid.</p> <p>ETA: also, it's company provided candy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655535 Fri, 23 May 2014 16:03:01 +0000 MsLipGloss 1655535@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For an alternative view, to the extent that you are covered (in whole or in part) by an employer funded (again, in whole or in part) health program, technically, your health directly impacts risk assessments/premium. I still think it was the wrong way to approach the issue, but it wasn't out of bounds. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655532 Fri, 23 May 2014 16:00:58 +0000 Greentea 1655532@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: DH says you should take the issue to human resources and tell them that she made you feel uncomfortable (that is harassment- it doesn't matter the intent, it is how you receive it).</p> <p>I find that very unprofessional and she is making assumptions. Totally uncalled for. I'm sorry :(</p> <p>Your health is your health and it isn't anyone else's business. Maybe the company should be more proactive about making sure there are more choices available- some people have medical issues that cause them to need to eat (like breastfeeding!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655519 Fri, 23 May 2014 15:42:53 +0000 lilteacherbee 1655519@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ugh, I'm annoyed for you! So not any of her business. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655518 Fri, 23 May 2014 15:41:49 +0000 mrs. bird 1655518@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>seeing as how it's acceptable to eat in these meetings, i'm not sure why she would think it's appropriate to comment on your snack choices, that's just rude! if she was so concerned about employees eating healthfully, maybe she should start some sort of healthy choice snack overhaul in the provided snack areas, but singling you out for eating what they've provided seems insane! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655488 Fri, 23 May 2014 15:18:43 +0000 BSB 1655488@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, very odd. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655472 Fri, 23 May 2014 15:07:55 +0000 PurplePumps 1655472@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Uhh, that only is that weird, that is completely out of line imo. Your snacking on candy or whatever you want is none of her business! If there was some policy about no eating in a meeting, then ok, but other, noooooo.. just no! I'd be so annoyed if I was in your position. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655465 Fri, 23 May 2014 15:05:01 +0000 Boheme 1655465@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That is REALLY weird! Does your direct manager know about it? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655342 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:45:14 +0000 Cherrybee 1655342@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: Umm, that's pretty weird. Do you have a lot of time off sick (clutching at straws here!)? That's the ONLY time I would mention that to one of my staff - as part of a return to work interview after one of many periods of minor sickness. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655334 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:40:02 +0000 ShootingStar 1655334@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Arden: Definitely wasn't about eating in the meeting, it was the fact that I was eating candy. She even went back to it later in the conversation and referred to my "health choices".</p> <p>@kjpugs: I kind of shrugged it off and said that since I had a six month old with pneumonia that maybe I just needed a little extra sugar. And then I was annoyed at myself afterwards for having to justify it. I BF. I get hungry. Candy was there and free. </p> <p>I don't know her all that well. I've been here for a little over a year and up until a couple months ago we were under someone else, who I liked a lot. And he was actually in the meeting and laughed when I set down a handful of starbursts and showed me the wrappers of the ones he'd just eaten. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655326 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:33:56 +0000 illumina 1655326@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Was she joking?? I would have no idea how I'd respond to this if I felt like they weren't joking and I couldn't just laugh it off!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655323 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:32:27 +0000 simplyfelicity 1655323@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Arden: Do you guys have a close relationship? Even then, it seems super weird! I would never say that to another person unless they had diabetes or some sort of sugar processing issue. She seems bored. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655322 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:31:36 +0000 kjpugs 1655322@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree it's COMPLETELY inappropriate, but I am stuck on what to do.</p> <p>What did you say to her? Maybe discuss it with your boss and how it made you uncomfortable and also a that it felt inappropriate? He or she may help guide you.</p> <p>I had a boss once, after a conference, have a meeting with me about healthy eating and etiquette. Yes, seriously. I'm a VERY picky eater. At the conference there were often things (banquet settings) that I did not like. I politely ate what I would/could, and didn't complain, or act like a toddler, etc. But she (and others) would be like, "WHY DON'T YOU JUST TRYYYY IT" (which I find mortifying and rude, as a picky eater who wishes she wasn't, but has severe anxiety, especially regarding food.) I was blown away by how bold it was of her to go into that. It was a horrible job and I was on my way out anyway (I was barely doing my job, while job hunting.) They didn't have an HR department and the "legal counsel" who served as it was pretty much just as bad, so it's not like there was anyhing I could do. I felt that it became an issue because she didn't like me as a person or an employee. Do you think this person has an issue with you? How is your work relatinoship? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655320 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:29:57 +0000 mamimami 1655320@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's weird for sure but like @MaryM says, some people just have their weird quirks. I had a boss that was pretty obsessed with food and was always commenting about food, like what meetings had food or did not have food, why didn't they tell us there would be food, commenting on other people's food. I just took it as her own personal issue. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655316 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:28:28 +0000 Arden 1655316@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If she thought it was rude to eat candy during the meeting, sure. </p> <p>Talking to you about your health habits? TOTALLY none of her business. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655307 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:24:31 +0000 Anagram 1655307@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ShootingStar: She was out of line. Totally, totally out of line. I'm EPing and I eat frequently at work and if someone brought that up in a negative way, I would provide them with so much over-information, they would super regret having ever brought it up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655306 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:24:07 +0000 Mamaof2 1655306@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@.twist.: ditto! :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655293 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:20:58 +0000 ShootingStar 1655293@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@.twist.: LOL</p> <p>@MaryM: Everybody eats in meetings here. Some days I have meetings around the clock. If I didn't eat in meetings, I might not get to eat at all. She definitely said she was concerned about my health habits. </p> <p>I'm just WTF about the whole thing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655292 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:20:51 +0000 blackbird 1655292@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My coworkers and I give each other crap about what we eat (like today, cough, jelly beans) but it would be super weird for someone to specifically express "concerns" to me about what I was eating. Maybe the candy was loud and disruptive?......super weird. </p> <p>I bet your boss' boss is the epitome of health, since she's the Health Nazi and all *eye roll* </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/is-this-weird-1#post-1655291 Fri, 23 May 2014 13:20:45 +0000 catlady 1655291@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Totally none of her business!</p> <p>Is she significantly older than you? Maybe she feels "motherly" towards you? I'm trying to come up with a positive way to think about it... </p>