https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 17 Apr 2026 07:33:59 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910123 Thu, 13 Feb 2020 08:59:59 +0000 bhbee 2910123@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ajsmommy: :grin: :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910121 Thu, 13 Feb 2020 08:17:10 +0000 Ajsmommy 2910121@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks everyone for weighing in! I appreciate it.</p> <p>A little anecdote from my "in love" dd yesterday after school.....she said B, the boy she loves, sat by her and then chased her at recess... then she sighed, made a hand gesture and said all exasperated "whew, this love thing is moving too fast for me"... </p> <p>Happy Valentine's Day tomorrow everyone :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910094 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 20:14:17 +0000 wrkbrk 2910094@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I could totally see my son doing this! Agree with the PP who said a child’s definition of love evolves over time. Even our PreK teachers say I love you to the kids. They all talk that way. So I don’t think I’d be overly concerned! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910076 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 17:12:34 +0000 PinkElephant 2910076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They don't really say they are "in love" but there is a ton of talk about marriage in my 5 year old daughter's kindergarten class and her 7 year old sister's second grade class. I tend to just roll with it. The party line in this house is that when they're older they can marry whomever they like as long as that person is (a) a nice person (b) also wants to marry them (consent, haha), and (c) isn't already in our family. I try to make them aware that regardless of what they think now, they might change their minds by the time they are old enough to get married (or by next week, haha). I explained to the kindergartener today that I didn't even know their daddy until after we both finished college - her little mind was blown!</p> <p>As someone else said, it's hard for us to see it from the same naiive perspective that the kids do - I think they're just playing at imagining adult life, because at least in my daughter's classes, none of the kids talking about marriage/boyfriends/girlfriends has any interest in true romance. My oldest bounces back and forth between telling me she's marrying a particular boy and that she and her bff are going to live together and help raise each others' kids and have a dog shelter. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910060 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 13:48:11 +0000 PurplePeony 2910060@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My kindergartener is “in love,” but I’m pretty sure it’s just because half the girls in her class are “in love” with the same boy. (Explanation: he’s really cool because none of the other boys like playing dress up but this boy does sometimes). She told me that she’s not going to be able to marry him when they grow up because he already promised another girl and also has a back-up in case that doesn’t work out, luckily she just seemed to think it was hilarious and wasn’t upset or anything. We talked about how lots of things can happen between being in kindergarten and being old enough to get married, and how they’re all going to meet lots more people over the years and have lots of time to decide who they’ll eventually marry, and it’s okay to change their minds. We also talked about making sure to get permission every time before giving hugs (still a work in progress, but hopefully starting to sink in). Overall, it’s pretty cute and a good teaching opportunity, I think. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910047 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 11:30:45 +0000 CObee 2910047@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When my daughter was in kinder her best little boy friend really took to her and declared pretty much every day that he loved her and they were going to get married. She loved it and talked to me all the time about how they loved each other and he was her boyfriend and they would get married when they were grown ups. We had kind of an ongoing conversation about it throughout the year (it went on so long!) and it was nice for her to be so open about it to me - I took it as an opportunity to talk about how I was glad she had such a good friend, and that she has so long before she has to pick who she wants to marry and it’s ok if she wants to change her mind, etc. So I mostly went along with it with gentle reminders. Our situation took a bit of a turn where the little boy started being a bit controlling towards the end of the year and trying to tell her who she could and could not play with, which she let me know bothered her and gave me the chance to talk to her about getting to make her own decisions and not letting a friend (especially a boyfriend) tell her what to do or who to hang out with, and as that went on and she started not liking him as much, that just because he “loves” her so much doesn’t mean she has to “love” him or be his girlfriend. In the end I was grateful to be able to talk to her about these ideas and plant them in her head so hopefully they’ll be familiar when she’s a teenager and it REALLY starts to matter. I am still a tiny bit annoyed that he put all these ideas in her head, but it really did stay innocent in her mind and not really mean anything more than that they were best friends and loved playing together. Now she’s in second grade and still has these ideas (she somehow has three boyfriends now and two other “crushes”) but I ask her what it means to be boyfriend and girlfriend and she tells me it means that they will go on dates in middle school. (Her explanation of dates luckily still just sounds like a play date.) I feel like it’s going to be a rough journey raising a girl (or boy for sure) but am hopeful that by not trying to correct her or make her feel like I’m telling her what to do, the open conversations can continue and will be helpful as we get into harder subjects. :) whew sorry about the novel, I just really struggled at times with what we went through that year and think it’s turned out ok so far, so I thought it might be helpful to hear! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910040 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 10:58:15 +0000 Beehive 2910040@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So cute. At that age my son was referring to his best (female) friend as his "girlfriend" (without any true understanding of the connotation of course), including in the stories he wrote in class! We did suggest to him that he call her his friend or best friend instead. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910036 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 10:51:49 +0000 graceandjoy 2910036@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a 5 year old too, if she came home and declared she loves a boy from class, I would probably say ok, cool. Haha! Or maybe I’d ask her who else she loves and let her redirect herself to loving family, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910030 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 09:41:34 +0000 muffinsmuffins 2910030@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it’s hard as adults to see things from a naive perspective as we are so jaded by our own experiences over a lifetime. But, as you said, she sees this in her own way as innocent and just that she really likes this person so that equals love. It’s likely not romantic or more than a keen friendship because children don’t possess that ability at her age. I would leave it be. Her concept of love will evolve over time and you can be there to guide her as needed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910029 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 09:33:20 +0000 ElbieKay 2910029@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would let it go. She will refine her idea of love as she grows up.</p> <p>My Kindergartener keeps complaining that he wants to marry his 18mo twin sisters because he loves them so much. I told him you can't marry your sister and this boundary bothers him.</p> <p>I have not bothered to address the bigamy issue with his idea. I'm already struggling to prevent him from identifying one of the twins as his favorite. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910026 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 08:59:55 +0000 bhbee 2910026@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd probably just let it go (smile and nod) unless something worrying came up - like inappropriate touching or something - I think kids just try out a lot of words and ideas and they don't think much of it. Or it's a little phase and they'll get bored and move on. The words I try to say something about are when I think they might be hurtful (to your child or others). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/kindergarten-love#post-2910024 Wed, 12 Feb 2020 08:10:49 +0000 Ajsmommy 2910024@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How do you approach it if your LO proclaims they are in "LOVE"? Do you just roll with it? Do you try to discourage the word love and use "like" or something else? </p> <p>Curious bc we are here and our DD has declared she loves a boy in her class..... honestly both DH and I were caught off guard and at first it is cute. But then it hit me that she's awfully young to be using that word in this context. However, we say we love each other often in our home.</p> <p>I don't want to minimalize her feelings or make her uncomfortable or like she can't share her feelings with us by dismissing them or telling her she is wrong and she doesn't love this boy bc she doesn't know what love is.... I also don't want her to get "hurt" if he doesn't return the feelings (although it appears he does kind of like her... and I'm not sure she'd even be "hurt" if he didn't....????)</p> <p>Anyway, just wondering if anyone else with kids a little older has dealt with young love and how you approached it, if at all...…? </p> <p>I think that ultimately its fine and when she says love she means it in her way, her innocent, kindergarten way....</p> <p>Curious to get others input and insight if you've been here or what you think you'll do when you do get to this. </p>