https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 08 Jul 2026 22:31:19 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2547270 Thu, 12 May 2016 10:32:05 +0000 LuLu Mom 2547270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>you've inspired me to try this tonight! Our biggest fight is her wanting someone to lay with her, but maybe if i let her read in bed until she's ready she will fall asleep on her own! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2547263 Thu, 12 May 2016 10:28:35 +0000 808love 2547263@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am totally going to do this! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2547116 Thu, 12 May 2016 09:02:54 +0000 DillonLion 2547116@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We don't, but bedtime is usually a smooth procedure for us. If it wasn't, I'd consider trying this! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2547091 Thu, 12 May 2016 08:52:03 +0000 yin 2547091@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think that sounds like a good idea and would be willing to try if we run into some trouble with sleep. Currently both kids fall asleep within 5-10 minutes of putting them down for the night. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546934 Thu, 12 May 2016 07:23:37 +0000 milano14 2546934@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It took me awhile to come to the realization that this is what would work, but we've been doing it for 6 months now with my 5.5 year old and it works perfectly. He is allowed to stay in his room after bedtime books. He can read, draw, or play on his kindle if he has any time left for the day. And when he's ready to go to sleep he just does.<br /> Definitely better than fighting with him to go to sleep when I want him to! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546912 Thu, 12 May 2016 06:57:07 +0000 KayKay 2546912@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It seems like just an older version of the "sleepy but awake" that lots of people try to do with infants to teach them to put themselves to sleep! And I would say it's probably what we have done with our kids since then (naps and night). I can never MAKE my kids sleep, but I can put them to bed at an appropriate time and enforce staying in their room/quiet time, no matter when they actually fall asleep!</p> <p>Now that DD1 is older, she has a nightlight in her room that she can turn on. She doesn't seem to abuse the priveledge. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546873 Thu, 12 May 2016 05:34:49 +0000 HappyBaker 2546873@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: Yes this exactly with feeling so much more civilized!</p> <p>@Finfan: So glad it is working for you guys too!</p> <p>@JennyD: Amen!</p> <p>DH sort of felt like I was taking a pass by leaving her alone, but we usually waste our entire night and get so frustrated, this way felt so much better for all involved. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546866 Thu, 12 May 2016 05:24:42 +0000 ValentineMommy 2546866@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We don't, but that's awesome that it worked for you!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546863 Thu, 12 May 2016 05:12:20 +0000 catomd00 2546863@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@junebugsmama: she is still in a crib and liked to be rocked/sung to before bed, but it was getting out of control with the "one more song" requests and crying when we would put her down. Before bed, we snuggle in our bed and she gets to choose a show to watch. Around 8 (bed time), we will ask her if she is sleepy and is ready for bed or not. She usually is, but sometimes she says no and asks for another show. We let her watch another 15 minutes. Ever since doing this she has had almost zero tantrums about Turning the tv off and even does it herself and gets up and goes to her room. </p> <p>Then, we rock and I sing her 2 songs. After that I ask her if she is ready to lay down. Again, sometimes she asks for 1 more song, sometimes not. Anytime I don't ask her if she's ready to lay down or if she says no but I say it's time to anyways it ends in a disaster. Almost every night she says she is ready to lay down after 1 extra song, 2 max and no tears after that. Bedtime has become a 5 minute routine after we get into her room vs. an unpredictable ticking time bomb taking up to an hour! </p> <p>She turned 2 in February and we started it about a month after that. I have noticed generally that just giving her choices and control as often as I can has really made life so much easier on us and taken the struggle out of basically everything that has to get done in the day! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546851 Thu, 12 May 2016 00:46:50 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2546851@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Genius idea! I see now how precious sleep is when you have kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546849 Thu, 12 May 2016 00:18:13 +0000 mrsbubbletea 2546849@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@catomd00: what's the two year old variation you guys do and when did you start? :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546823 Wed, 11 May 2016 22:23:07 +0000 Finfan 2546823@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, we have been doing this for probably a month or so now and it's been life-changing. She still goes to bed way too late but at least one of us isn't stuck in there with her. We plan to move up bedtime by waking her up earlier in the morning now that she's falling asleep completely on her own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546805 Wed, 11 May 2016 21:55:47 +0000 catomd00 2546805@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't do this exactly with my 2 year old, but we do a variation on it that's more age appropriate and we have had pretty minimal tears since giving her some control of bedtime. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546804 Wed, 11 May 2016 21:51:30 +0000 JennyD 2546804@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah we do that too. Last night she declared "but I'm not sleeping!" And I was like, cool. As long as you're quiet I don't care what you do :shocked: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546786 Wed, 11 May 2016 21:26:21 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2546786@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That's how we've been doing bedtime lately.<br /> "You don't have to sleep, but you do have to stay in your room"<br /> She reads for a little and then passes out.<br /> It feels so much more civilized than the battles we had been having. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/letting-your-preschooler-decide-when-to-go-to-bed#post-2546765 Wed, 11 May 2016 20:57:13 +0000 HappyBaker 2546765@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Does anyone let their preschooler or older decide on when to go to bed? I read this article ages ago but thought it sounded crazy:<br /> <a href="http://amomwithalessonplan.com/mommy-fun-fact-15-a-better-bedtime/" rel="nofollow">http://amomwithalessonplan.com/mommy-fun-fact-15-a-better-bedtime/</a></p> <p>Fast forward to now, DD is 3.5 and even though she doesn't nap most days, she almost always fights bedtime and we end up laying in her bed for over an hour trying to get her to go to sleep. </p> <p>Tonight I decided to try the idea from the article, so after we did our bedtime routine (ended around 7:45) I told her she could read quietly in her room until she was tired or until it got dark. She read until 8:30 and then called for me to tuck her in...I snuggled for 5 minutes and then was FREE! It was amazing and I'm hoping it's not a fluke!</p> <p>Wondering if anyone else does something similar. </p>