https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 03 May 2026 12:28:26 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2514089 Sun, 03 Apr 2016 16:20:03 +0000 DesertDreams88 2514089@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's timeline logic. Due to fertility issues we need Clomid+met+progesterone for a sticky baby, and Clomid maxes out at 3-6 months of usage. We'd prefer to concieve in May, June, July, or August, so we'll start in May which will be 14-15 months PP. It may or may not work out, fingers crossed.</p> <p>I had an easy pregnancy &amp; newborn stage, despite tons of first timer anxiety. Labor sucked big time but I have some hopeful changes in mind for next time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2514083 Sun, 03 Apr 2016 15:56:26 +0000 SweetiePie 2514083@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO is a few days shy of 19 months.<br /> For the first year of his life I couldn't fathom having another. I couldn't understand how people willingly did it all again. I'm not a newborn/baby person. </p> <p>DH is in the "lets get it over with" camp. He was ready to start IVF again at 6 months PP. Hell to the no. I explained that I needed a few things. I needed some time to recover from the craziness of the first year of parenthood. We are in a groove and happy and I need some time to enjoy that and to be able to really appreciate it. And that would in turn make the newborn stage worth it to me again. So I guess it's the "master the first one" logic? </p> <p>We are getting the IVF ball rolling now. I still don't feel ready and deep down think I could be happy with just one. But I know I wouldn't regret it if we had another and DH wants another so I'm going to suck it up. I think. And I now have a better understanding that everything is just a phase and not permanent. And you even look back on the tough stuff kinda fondly. Eventually. :grin:<br /> But we won't go to extremes. We have to do IVF, but I'm limiting it to two rounds. If it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2513886 Sat, 02 Apr 2016 23:28:29 +0000 daniellemybelle 2513886@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had a pretty traumatic experience with birth, recovery, breastfeeding and the first year with a colicky newborn. So my mindset was never "let's just go for it" or "let's get it over with" because we were trying to get our footing with just one kid. The idea of adding another just didn't seem possible!</p> <p>Now at 2.5, I feel like we have a bit of a handle on it. LO is a lot more independent. Parenting is challenging in different ways but I think we are ready for another in the near-ish future. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2513490 Sat, 02 Apr 2016 09:04:40 +0000 danda 2513490@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>"Let's get past the baby stage!" I was looking into big vacations like cruises or resorts and many had a kids club starting at age 2 or 3... So I started looking forward to the day when not yet conceived kid #2 would be old enough for that and a vacation could have "relax, real vacation" elements for DH and me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2513475 Sat, 02 Apr 2016 08:20:48 +0000 Canoli 2513475@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No real logic. My husband and I were already in our 30's when we met and got married and we knew we wanted 2-3 kids so we had to get started right away. We have a 2.5 year gap between 1 and 2 and 2 and 3 will be 2 years apart. It's definitely going to be crazy and a little expensive with 3 in daycare for a few years but it's all good! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2513464 Sat, 02 Apr 2016 07:40:40 +0000 MrsKoala 2513464@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would not have been ready for the second without 2 things. 1. LO1 consistently sleeping through the night. It started happening a couple weeks after he turned 1. 2. I wanted a summer off of breastfeeding and pregnancy and to have my body to myself. Once I got those things, I was ready to go for a second since we always knew we wanted more than one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2513386 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 22:18:59 +0000 coopsmama 2513386@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well, absolutely no thought process with number two on my end. I unexpectedly got pregnant at 3.5 months PP and it was insane at the time but now I'm so thrilled it happened and love having two so close in age.</p> <p>My third (now 21 weeks pregnant) required much more thought. I didn't want to get pregnant until after my daughter weaned and she self weaned at 14 months. I really wanted to go on an small getaway with DH and we did that in October when LO 2 was 15 months old. We decided we either needed to TTC and get pregnant within six months or we'd have to table it until a work trip for DH (and me too) in late 2017/early 2018 for various reasons so we just went for it and got pregnant at 16 mo PP. I know now after three pregnancies it requires hopping off the ledge so to speak but it's all turned out with my first two kids and I expect that again this go around! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2513380 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 22:01:52 +0000 LovelyPlum 2513380@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We were waiting for financial reasons, but it turned out to be good, because I unexpectedly had a healthy complication come up. Now I sorta want to get a move on as soon as we can so that we have the option for three in a few years. Who knows, though, because my body hates pregnancy and my career is unpredictable on a good day. </p> <p>We are hoping to TTC at the end of the summer, but that may change. Not sure yet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2513371 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 21:33:38 +0000 PinkElephant 2513371@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dc yoga bee: Seriously, good decision. We do it because we have to and survive, but planes are never fun. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second/page/2#post-2513370 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 21:25:13 +0000 dc yoga bee 2513370@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PinkElephant: @PinkElephant: we were going to take lo to Chicago at 14 months, but after we just went to San Diego solo for our anniversary, we got to see babies/toddlers in the airport and on the plane. We both decided no freaking way before we even saw each other (flew down seperately since DH was there first for work.) screaming toddlers on 5hr flights, crazy schedules, flight delays. We will wait until she's 4-5 to fly with her. We are now going to the beach instead (3hr driving!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513357 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 20:55:20 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2513357@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsBrewer: that's my alma mater! U of All the Babies!</p> <p>I'm a baby person. If they didn't turn into three year olds I'd have more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513346 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 20:41:27 +0000 PinkElephant 2513346@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@gingerbebe: Love it. He should vacation with my DH, they'd get along fabulously. As a mom of two and one on the way, I will give you some good new - the second (and I hope the third) become iPad literate much, much earlier! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513336 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 20:26:39 +0000 gingerbebe 2513336@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@PinkElephant: DH pretty much does not want to go on a family vacation (not including mandatory family get togethers) until all kids are 3, potty trained, and able to entertain themselves on iPads on the plane, so this all fits into this logic. "Then we can go to Aulani and dump them off at Chip and Dale's house of screaming kids and drink margaritas at the pool." We had a hellacious trip to Maui when DS was 13 months for a wedding and between the awful flights, roseola, and no sleep, DH was like we need to have all the babies now so I can come back to Hawaii some day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513318 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 19:59:13 +0000 PinkElephant 2513318@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@gingerbebe: hahaha I like your husband's take on it! I keep telling myself that our friends who are waiting to have kids can laugh and roll their eyes at our chaos now, but when we're traveling the world while our kids are at college and they're still carting 10 year olds to soccer practice, they'll realize maybe our plan wasn't so bad after all. 😜</p> <p>@maddyz: my OB nurse was like "you have two kids, how did this happen - no, seriously, how?!" In response to my third pregnancy. I was like "I guess they sleep a little TOO well...." 😊 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513308 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 19:47:33 +0000 dc yoga bee 2513308@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@maddyz: this! We pay my mom to babysit, and she stays at our house a few nights a week, and drives 60mi to watch LO. She's already said she'll keep the baby until kindergarten, but if we want another one don't wait until she's 5 if we want my my to watch them!</p> <p> DH wants our kids close together. DD now cosleeps, still nurses every 2 hrs, and is a terrible sleeper. She had terrible acid reflux, and colic. But, deep down we always have wanted two kids. No guarantee they'll be close, but no guarantee they'll hate each other too. My brother is my best friend! So, we had a slip this month at 10 months, although I would like to keep losing weight, and start at 12 months. It took a year the first time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513250 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 18:52:12 +0000 maddyz 2513250@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I joke that lo1 slept through the night a few nights in a row at 10 months and look what happened!</p> <p>It's not far off from the truth. We knew we wanted at least two and also knew if we thought about it too much it wouldn't happen. I am both excited and terrified to have Los 19 months apart.</p> <p>It's going to be cheaper in the long term to pay a nanny to watch two for fewer years. So that part kinda makes sense. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513213 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 17:29:13 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 2513213@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It was never a question on whether or not we wanted a second, so we chose to go for it sooner than later because we were already "in the thick" of it, and wanted to get the baby stage over with sooner rather than later. I didn't want two kids in totally different stages. I thought it would be easier in the long run to do some things in parallel. </p> <p>I also thought if I waited for things to get easier with one, I'd never want to do it again. The further I get from the baby stage, the less I want to revisit it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513212 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 17:28:59 +0000 gingerbebe 2513212@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well, we knew we wanted at least one more, it took us 3 years to have DS, and I was 33 when I had him. So we knew time was sorta ticking. I was 6 months shy of my 35th birthday when DS turned 1 and DH felt like I probably wouldn't get pregnant on my own, so he suggested we just NTNP until I turned 35 with the assumption that we'd be visiting the RE at that point.</p> <p>WELP we got surprise pregnant and found out right after DS turned 1!! My cycle was all over the board after I weaned at 9.5 months so I had no idea until the deed was done. They will be 20 months apart and while we were terrified/nervous of the spacing (DS was an AWFUL newborn/infant, I had PPA/PPD, and I had a really tough pregnancy), DH was just like "let's just keep the pain train going - we have all the gear, we're still in the trenches of having a little guy around, let's just commit to our life sucking for the next few years and come up for air when we're 40!" </p> <p>Gotta love the guy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513209 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 17:20:41 +0000 Woolly Mammoth 2513209@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We wanted a 3 or 4 year age gap, so we're going for it. Some weeks I feel like everything is going great and I've got this parenting thing down and other weeks I feel like I'm completely flailing.</p> <p>LO is not a good sleeper, he cosleeps with us, and he's a tenacious nurser. I couldn't have imagined getting pregnant before he was 18-24 months, and it's just now at 2 1/2 that I actually want to be pregnant. We've never wavered in wanting a second child, though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513181 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 16:37:00 +0000 LAZB 2513181@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We wanted more, and dd is a great sleeper and a pretty easy baby, so the sooner the better </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513094 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 14:49:58 +0000 mrsbubbletea 2513094@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: lol! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513063 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 14:26:12 +0000 FancyGem 2513063@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had health issues after having my son. Now that those issues are starting to be resolved, we have decided to wait until the end of the year ttc. That will give me time to get back in shape after recovering from my health issues. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513052 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 14:21:16 +0000 Mrs. D 2513052@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our logic is " we can't afford double daycare" so we weaited to start trying until we could pull her out of daycare for my mat leave, and when mat leave was over she'd be heading to Primary. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513051 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 14:19:57 +0000 Foodnerd81 2513051@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My friends with kids the same age as my first started getting pregnant again, and I started feeling like I was almost ready for that too and maybe we could be less careful... Never got past that because it happened unexpectedly. I'm both excited and sad for the newborn stage to be done. (I think. Only 98% sure we are done). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513038 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 14:13:31 +0000 catlady 2513038@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had it in my mind that I wanted a spring baby and a 2.5 year age gap, so we went for it when the timing for that worked out. Mentally, I don't think I was actually ready at that point though. I finally feel ready so with luck we'll actually end up with a winter baby and a slightly greater than 3 year age gap. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513025 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 14:03:41 +0000 KayKay 2513025@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We started NTNP/TTC right around 1yo bc we knew we wanted 2...maybe 3...and didn't want to be too old when preg with a potential 3rd. I wasn't really ready, though, so it was definitely more NTNP than TTC. Then we got pregnant with DD2 right after we had decided to wait a year. Whoops! Haha. We are now NTNP/TTC a third. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513023 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 14:02:36 +0000 ShootingStar 2513023@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We were all over the map. We were always pretty sure we wanted two. But we didn't feel like we could actually handle two until DS turned 1. But we felt like daycare was too expensive until he turned 3 so we didn't pull the trigger. Then we got the idea that maybe we'd do foster to adopt instead. We got pretty far along in the process and then DS's 2nd birthday hit. We kept seeing all these pictures of him as a tiny newborn (timehops and stuff) and we got really nostalgic and decided to try. We're now expecting LO2 when DS is 2 years, 9 months :silly: .</p> <p>We never really felt like we'd mastered anything. And having another baby was pretty much a whim, lol. But I'm happy our kids will be close together in age. And I'm amazed at how well it's all worked out. I'm have a girl, which I'm so excited about, we got pregnant first try after needing fertility treatments for DS, and we won't have 2 in daycare until DS is 3. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513018 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 13:59:42 +0000 avivoca 2513018@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our plan was to wait until H was 2.5-3 to start trying for a second. That way, we w would have fewer years of double daycare payments AND we wanted her sibling to be born before the August 1 cutoff for Kindergarten. However, I'm pregnant with #2 now and we are in for three years of double daycare and a total of 9 years of paying for daycare, assuming I don't become a SAHM for a few years when LO2 gets here. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2513003 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 13:52:19 +0000 Anagram 2513003@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We were in the "get it over with" camp. =) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/logic-when-trying-for-a-second#post-2512986 Fri, 01 Apr 2016 13:43:12 +0000 Cole 2512986@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: LOL! I think get naked before I change my mind is going to be my tactic with our second :silly: .<br /> This is all fascinating to me, it isn't really a conversation that has come up much with friends and I am glad to know people aren't out there thinking this parenting thing is a cake walk!</p> <p>All of my friends are having, or at least tried to have their kids close together and I am over here considering secret birth control! (Not really, my husband will wait but he's really excited got a second.) </p>