https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 18 Apr 2026 11:10:39 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628737 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 16:55:26 +0000 youboots 2628737@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dragon: ultimately no one is going to be as invested in your pregnancy and your life than you are. </p> <p>Everyone wants different things out of friendships but I noticed that you are looking for "support" I'll be honest I want friends that are fun and I have common interests with- I'm happy to be a listening ear when needed but I don't enjoy relationships where I am someone's go to for their emotional support. On the flip side I have a therapist so that I don't need much from my friends. Might you benifit from having someone neutral to talk to? I hope you don't take this the wrong way- I obviously don't know you at all- just a small observation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628717 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 15:43:01 +0000 dragon 2628717@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BabyBoecksMom: Good for you!! I need to just do the same and find support from another girlfriend because she's not the one. Thank you :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628714 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 15:35:53 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 2628714@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dragon: Thanks. Yes it's hard, and it used to bother me a lot (still gets to me some times), but I realize that I need to focus on my husband and girls now, and I don't have time to deal with a toxic person. Good luck &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628711 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 15:30:10 +0000 dragon 2628711@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BabyBoecksMom: Oh no!! Not your sister. It's a sad and hard thing when someone you love can be so down on you but maybe you're right. I just have to let it go. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628703 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 15:22:43 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 2628703@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dragon: I'm so sorry you're going through this. I have someone in my life, just like your friend... but it's my sister. I have tried to make things work, but she constantly makes digs at me (like, every single time I see her)... and I realized she's just a toxic person. I know you have a lot of history with your friend and probably had some good times, but I would say to just let this one go. You guys are in different parts of your life. Hold on to the good times :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628696 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 15:00:35 +0000 dragon 2628696@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: It really sucks but I did what I could. </p> <p>@lamariniere: That's some what the same story with us. I was already a mom but once she had her son things began to change until it was over basically. I'm so sorry that your friendship ended but so happy you have other friends, better friends! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628690 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 14:47:49 +0000 lamariniere 2628690@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry you are going through this. I had a very similar situation to @youboots: with a childhood friend that I became even closer to as an adult. After my first LO was born there was a marked difference in our relationship and it is all but shut down now. It has been multiple years since the last time we spoke and I just don't think the friendship is there anymore. Unfortunately, it happens, but I'm glad I have other people I can lean on and they fulfill me more than that former friend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628540 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 12:20:12 +0000 Mamaof2 2628540@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dragon: :sad: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628538 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 12:17:15 +0000 dragon 2628538@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I reached out and she ignored it. I'm glad I can say I tried. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628452 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 10:37:19 +0000 dragon 2628452@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: Maybe she was. I think I'm just going to reach out and take a chance. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628437 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 10:23:52 +0000 Mamaof2 2628437@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dragon: maybe she was hurt that you cancelled the girls night and that's why she pulled away?</p> <p>I would send a text and say "lets meet for lunch!" and see what she says ..... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628434 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 10:23:09 +0000 dragon 2628434@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@youboots: I completely understand. That's great that you have other close girlfriends. I have tried in the past but maybe I just need to try again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628430 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 10:21:33 +0000 dragon 2628430@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Blue: We have tried in the pass but I notice it becomes more of a game of ping pong. Rather than just telling me what's going on it becomes more of what I'm doing wrong. She is a very prideful person and likes to keep things to herself. She even hides things from her mom just because she is scared of failure or the outcome may not be what she expected. And I get that. I really do but I just want to get to the root of the issue, whatever it may be. DH suggested just reaching out and saying how are you? Start off light. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628428 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 10:21:02 +0000 youboots 2628428@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dragon: it was hard and I do miss her sometimes still but seasons of life can change things. I do have a couple other close girlfriends. Have you talked to her about what's going on? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628426 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 10:19:22 +0000 dragon 2628426@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@youboots: I'm so sorry to hear that. It's a sad and hard thing to lose a friend. I hope you have another friend you are able to confide in. I don't and that's what has made this such a tough decision for me. I have DH but there's nothing like a good girlfriend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628417 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 10:13:34 +0000 youboots 2628417@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Blue: you have a good point- my friend completely cut me out when I confronted her and said we needed to talk out the issues. She made the choice for my by refusing to deal with confrontation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628413 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 10:11:41 +0000 Mrs. Blue 2628413@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have the two of you ever really set down and talked about everything and what was bothering you? Without knowing her or her life, do you think it's possible that she has some insecurity and her default is to minimize the good things in the lives of those she is close to so it helps her deal with whatever she feels inadequate about in her own life? </p> <p>My thoughts are: If it's really bothering you and you really miss her, you'll probably regret it if you don't try, BUT I think to have a shot of it working, you need to have a really open conversation about that you miss her and want her in your life but also explaining what and why you were hurt in the past by what she was saying and maybe she'll open up about some things that you didn't realize, either, that may explain why it was "easy" for her to stop talking to you. </p> <p>Good luck with whatever you decide! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628408 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 10:10:16 +0000 youboots 2628408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sorry this sucks. I lost my best friend of over 10 years a year and a half ago. Not exactly the same thing but we could not grow into our new lives of being parents together it seemed to put her at odds with me. No advice exactly- just saying it happens. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/long-time-friend-do-i-reach-outagain#post-2628385 Wed, 28 Sep 2016 09:43:56 +0000 dragon 2628385@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Okay I'm a regular bee going anon for this post.</p> <p>I will try to make this as short as possible. "Jane" and I have been friends for 10+ years. We were each others maids of honor in our weddings, we have been there for the first birth of each other's children, you get the idea. Very close but also both equally stubborn and fought like sisters but loved each other just as much.</p> <p>Jane always would make digs here and there, which I was use to but as we got older (we were friends since childhood) the digs felt more like she was trying to put me down more than anything. An example was when I was house hunting a few years back, she made a comment of having my children living in a broom cabinet. In short, I felt like everything I was excited about she had something negative to add. Given this is who she is, I was use to it. It didn't take away from the fact that she was my best friend. It just was a little annoying because we were older and these were life changing moments it wasn't like she was commenting on which shirt I should get from Forever21. If that makes sense.</p> <p>We stopped speaking back in March but I reached out in July. And things seemed fine until she was just standoffish. We planned for a girls night and I couldn't make it so I texted letting her know and I didn't get a response and I never heard from her ever again. Until August when she sent a "wrong text" to me. I was in the middle for getting ready for my family vacation so I never texted her back to let her know that she texted the wrong person. </p> <p>I miss my friend. I'm hurt by the shadiest and how easy it seemed for her to not talk to me. I don't know if it's her just being stubborn and letting her pride get in the way or if she really just doesn't care. It feels so weird being pregnant and not having my best friend there. I want to reach out but I'm fearful that it will end badly. </p> <p>Any thoughts? Should I reach out or not? </p>