https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 16 Jun 2026 09:48:43 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-416369 Tue, 27 Nov 2012 09:06:53 +0000 MamaBehr 416369@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We moved across the country when DD was 15 months old, and I struggled to make friends at first. But, when DS was born (we found out I was pregnant the second day we were in our new house....) I was actually able to make more friends! </p> <p>I currently do a baby bootcamp class, which is where I have met most of my mommy friends, I met some through a swim class at the Y, and neighbors. If we had time, I would be going to the library as well, and that is a great way to meet people. </p> <p>This time last year I was so depressed and lonely, I never thought I would like it here, but now that I have found friends (I ONLY have mommy friends down here!) it is great! I think it is a little easier to make friends through babies. It is a built in pick up line (could you call it that?) "Your baby is so cute! How old is she? Mine is ::insert age here::" commence conversation "Do you want to exchange phone numbers and do playdates?" (And most kids don't REALLY play at play dates until they are older, I think play dates are for the moms hahaha.</p> <p>When my husband was in Business School there were built in Mommy groups (which I didn't join because we didn't have kids) and I know that residency is different, but do you think you'll get a chance to meet other wives? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-416346 Tue, 27 Nov 2012 08:36:37 +0000 heffalump 416346@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I actually live in my home town and still don't have very many mom friends, and the ones I have live pretty far so I don't see them much. </p> <p>I've been wanting to join a mommy group from meetup.com, just haven't gotten around to it yet. We go to the library a lot and see lots of mommies and babies there, but your LO will still be young for that. I just make sure to get out of the house once a day to stay sane! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-416149 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 23:43:24 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 416149@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're far from all our family and friends so I understand. I do think that the first few months as a new mom are sort of isolating because you spend so much of it at home, so that's something to just be prepared for. Otherwise I agree that getting out there and finding a mommy group is probably the best. I've met some friends through mommy baby classes but my best friends here have been through a group for spouses (of medical students). Maybe there's something similar for residency? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-416108 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 22:38:33 +0000 Pancakes 416108@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just have to say that I agree with everything @Honeybear said! We moved when LO was 13 months old, and joining a playgroup, going to the playground, going to library storytime were all great ways to meet new moms (however, I'm in a military community where more people are in the mindset of "we're only here for a short time, so let's be friends NOW!"). </p> <p>Before LO was 1, I had a hard time getting out of the house to do any arranged activities, just because of how often she was napping and nursing, and I was always a stickler for making sure she never missed a nap. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-416101 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 22:31:24 +0000 betsyboop 416101@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We relocated when lo was very young, and I actually thought it was a great time to move because I found that many new moms in our new city were looking to befriend other new moms! I told my husband it felt a bit like college orientation where everyone was very friendly and open to making new friends because we were all in the same boat! I joined a neighborhood mom group, a new mom group and took lo to classes, and met some nice women. Good luck, I think you will be just fine :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-416071 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 22:08:51 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 416071@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd suggest asking the people he will be working with where young families live. My husband works between two towns, and when he had his interview he was told one town has more young families, so that is where we moved. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-416063 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 22:04:51 +0000 honeybear 416063@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva: Classes were tricky in our first move because they were really expensive and never at good times for us. Drop-in groups and things like walks around the neighborhood that didn't require corralling a 6-month old into a car seat were better bets until LO reached age 1. (For what it's worth, we just started our first organized "class" at age 2, although we've been to library storytime, etc.) Most of the time, I took (and still take) LO places that I like to go--mostly to outdoor spots, but we're lucky enough to now be in a location where it's pretty much spring and summer all year round. I haven't met a ton of moms by frequenting the state and local parks and botanical gardens, but LO and I do know a lot of park rangers and volunteers! ;) </p> <p>I'm sure that whatever you decide to do, everything will work out--you'll find a rhythm that works and mom friends to talk to, it just takes time. Flexibility is key in both moving and in mothering. :) Best wishes on the move! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415822 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 19:54:42 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 415822@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee wrote a great post about something similar - <a href="http://www.hellobee.com/2012/09/18/10-ways-for-introverts-to-meet-other-parents/" rel="nofollow">http://www.hellobee.com/2012/09/18/10-ways-for-introverts-to-meet-other-parents/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415820 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 19:52:54 +0000 Silva 415820@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@honeybear: Thanks for your thoughts! I have to keep reminding myself that we will be okay wherever we end up. There is just so much out of my control in this whole process, and I'm the kind of person who prefers to plan everything out!</p> <p>Your suggestion of the nursing group is a good idea- I could see finding La Leche League meetings in a new area as a good way to meet mom's with newborns. Or one of those postpartum, baby friendly yoga classes. And with the cost of living in this area, I might actually be able to afford to go to a class! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415691 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 18:11:09 +0000 honeybear 415691@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We've moved twice since LO was born 2 years ago. Both moves took us to entirely new areas where we knew no one. The first move was when LO was 5 months old. Here are my two cents: </p> <p>1) Hire movers and packers! It'll still be painful to unpack, but the cost is worth it if you have any heavy furniture and/or a lot of things. </p> <p>2) You'll probably be kind of lonely for a while, so it pays to be prepared for that mentally and have some sympathetic friends on speed dial. I think it's just hard to socialize as a mom to a young baby, even if you've got friends nearby. Babies require a lot of time and attention. But there's a brilliant light at the end of tunnel! In my experience, it becomes exponentially easier to meet other parents once your child is old enough to really enjoy the playground (we went out to the baby swings around 10 months and I met people immediately), the library, and other excursions. Once you've got a toddler, it's even easier. Plus, toddlers are just a lot of fun!</p> <p>But if you're really determined to do it right away, you could find a nursing group in your new neighborhood, and some storytimes start as young as 6 months. In some neighborhoods it might also work to take a walk at the same time every day. I did that, and although most of the moms I saw kind of nodded and hurried past me when I smiled at them, one or two stopped and talked. If you can carry your baby so that you go at a slower pace than with a stroller, that's even better. </p> <p>But the best advice I have is to take the long view. And realize that you've got a pretty awesome companion to hang out with already. ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415625 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:44:46 +0000 BoogieBea 415625@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've been living where I am for nearly 3 years now. It is hard. You really have to put yourself out there by attending mommy groups, kids classes, etc. Also, if you have a hobby, there maybe a mommy group out there geared towards that hobby. I recently joined a running mommy group. I have yet to attend any of the meetups but I will soon. And I'm also finding all these fun running events to do with the kids in the area through them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415609 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:38:19 +0000 hilsy85 415609@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't really know anyone in my area with kids...what has helped is joining a new mom's group that our pediatrician runs. I've met some nice women through that! ALso, I plan to sign LO up for classes when he's a few months old, which will hopefully help me meet other moms as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415602 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:36:08 +0000 Honeybee 415602@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva: My husband will have a lot of training to do our first couple years in his new job, so I know the kids and I will have periods of time when we're on our own a lot. But long term, I think this is a great move for us, and I'm really excited. :)</p> <p>Good luck with your move too! I hope your husband gets his top pick! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415589 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:32:23 +0000 Silva 415589@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Honeybee: those are great suggestions-</p> <p>I'm a little scared of residency, to be honest, and how much of a time requirement it will mean for my husband. </p> <p>I hope your move goes well! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415587 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:32:03 +0000 tororojo 415587@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva: I think it's natural to stay at home at first, while you're figuring things out and getting used to LO--that's how I envision myself with a newborn. But after that you'll probably have to be proactive about being social, which I think will be the case for me as well. Just think of it as an adventure! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415586 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:32:01 +0000 blackbird 415586@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't know, but I have had friends do it (military spouses). You just have to throw yourself into stuff and force yourself to be friendly and invite other moms out for lunch/play dates. It feels so forceful, but you won't make friends otherwise :)</p> <p>And surely some of your DH's new coworkers will be in that position?...the medical community seems pretty transient </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415579 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:29:55 +0000 Honeybee 415579@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'll let you know how it goes in about a month! We're relocating in few weeks to a brand new city two states away. I actually have a really great friend in our new town, but otherwise, we're starting all over in terms of establishing friendships. DD will be 2.5 and DS will be 9 months when we move.</p> <p>So far, my plan of action is to create a weekly schedule for us that gives the kids and I a lot of different experiences/opportunities each week. We're looking to enroll DD in a dance class, so hopefully she'll make some friends there, and of course, I'll be taking the kids to library storytime each week, to hopefully meet some new people. I'm also looking at what kind of different activities in the area (parks, swimming pools, children's museums, play gyms, music classes, etc...). Finally, I already signed up for a mom's listserv for my new city, so I'm hoping to meet some people through that, as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415563 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:25:33 +0000 Silva 415563@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@tororojo: I would definitely have to motivate to join mom's groups and playgroups. Its scary enough to think about parenting an infant- I guess for a while I've figured we'd stay close to home- but there are a lot of pros for this program and so I'm trying to re-envision things! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415551 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:23:01 +0000 tororojo 415551@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hmm, I don't have experience as a new mom but I think making friends can be tough anytime you move somewhere new! Maybe you could get involved in a mom's group, mother's day out or mommy and me-type classes to meet other moms? We moved out to the 'burbs right before we got married and have met a lot of people in the area through our church; not sure if that would be a good option for you guys but if so maybe you'll find other moms there to hang with? Kids are a great conversation starter and everyone loves a cute baby! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/making-friends-as-a-mom-or-in-a-new-community#post-415532 Mon, 26 Nov 2012 17:16:49 +0000 Silva 415532@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband is in medical school, and starting his residency in pediatrics in June. Basically, for those unfamiliar with the process, we have to create a list of his favorite programs in order of preference and then he will be "matched" based on the program's preference of applicants. </p> <p>He is interested in a program that is about 3 hours from our family and friends (and where we currently live). He's interested in closer programs, but this one has really got his interest. I'm interested too, because the cost of living in the area is lower than here, so we'd be more comfortable financially (I'm going to be staying at home for as long as we can afford it).</p> <p>What would it be like to move to a new community with an infant? Our baby will be about 1 1/2 months old when his residency starts. I know moving will be a giant PITA, but temporary. My bigger concerns are about being in a new place. </p> <p>I figure I'd have the same problem if we stay here- I don't really know anyone else with kids, so I'll have to get creative about meeting new people and filling our days so I don't go crazy. My husband is very supportive and involved, but he will be super busy.</p> <p>Would it be awful to be far away from everyone you know with a newborn? </p> <p>How do you make new friends and connect either as a new mom in general, or in a new community?</p> <p>Thoughts? </p>