https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 23 Apr 2026 23:08:02 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191860 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 17:52:00 +0000 chopsuey 191860@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: yay doggie to the rescue! Ugh. Your mil is so crazy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191853 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 17:41:05 +0000 Rubies 191853@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: @purrpletulips: I figure she would TOTALLY hate you for it but at least she would have a reason to as opposed to being just crazy for no reason. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191722 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 15:14:19 +0000 Modern Daisy 191722@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>And i definitely would not pay for any of our parents hotel rooms! We don't have the money in the first place, but even if we did that is such a huge burden to take on </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191719 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 15:13:30 +0000 Modern Daisy 191719@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow, I'm really glad to hear she isn't staying with you!! I was going to say - I really like my MIL, but I still wouldn't let her share a hotel room with me and DH. MAYBE if it was only for one night, but that is still really really pushing it. No, you need your space that is just wrong. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191635 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 14:00:08 +0000 oliviaoblivia 191635@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rachel: yep. I should write a book.</p> <p>And yeah, the hive totally makes me feel better! That this is the norm in my life makes me forget just how nuts it is sometimes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191629 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:57:05 +0000 Shutterbug 191629@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: yikes!! Every time I think it's as crazy as it can get, it gets crazier! I'm so sorry you have to deal with all this - I hope that seeing the reaction of the hive is making you feel better though :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191625 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:51:44 +0000 oliviaoblivia 191625@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaMoose: I know. I wish I had just let her leave so that she wouldn't know where we live. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191621 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:50:24 +0000 MamaMoose 191621@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: WHATTTTTT? That wrong apartment story is insane. This woman should be comitted. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191609 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:41:45 +0000 Running Elley 191609@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: What the heck???? I am SO sorry that you have to deal with all of this craziness! I’m glad that the hotel thing got sorted out but the way that she treats you is just…crazy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191599 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:33:16 +0000 oliviaoblivia 191599@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaMoose: I would have, but DH made the call. Not like she talks to me anyway.<br /> It's funny if she calls and I pick up his phone she's like "who is this?" as if there are a whole bunch of women who answer his phone.<br /> Once she showed up unannounced to our new apartment and I answered the door and she said "sorry, wrong apartment" and started to walk away. I'm the invisible woman apparently. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191590 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:21:35 +0000 MamaMoose 191590@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: Oh Lord. See I'm mean and I would have TOTALLY called her out on suddenly having enough money now that she's no longer interested in taking advantage of you. I really feel for you in this situation!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191588 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:20:43 +0000 purrpletulips 191588@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If staying at a cheaper hotel is going to make her look "poor" to her friends, let her friends pay for the more expensive hotel. Glad it worked out on its own and funny how she suddenly can have the money to pay for her own room.</p> <p>@rubies-love that idea :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191570 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:02:34 +0000 oliviaoblivia 191570@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rubies: You my dear are an evil mastermind. I love it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191569 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:01:37 +0000 Rubies 191569@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: You should brush your dog and carry his shedded fur in a baggie in your purse and just slop it on her every time you see her. Muhahah. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191567 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 13:00:56 +0000 oliviaoblivia 191567@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rubies: She doesn't like dog hair on her clothes :P<br /> Still have to see her at the wedding though. ugh. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191564 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 12:59:31 +0000 Rubies 191564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: Yaaaay! Does she not like dogs? Who cares, she's sleeping somewhere else! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent/page/2#post-191554 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 12:54:56 +0000 oliviaoblivia 191554@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>UPDATE!!! We are bringing the dog with us. DH told MIL and she immediately decided on her own not to come with us. So he didn't have to use the new backbone entirely yet, but he was ready to do so. And somehow now she has money for her own room....? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-191241 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 10:03:22 +0000 oliviaoblivia 191241@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: Funny thing is her latest boyfriend is a psychiatrist.</p> <p>You all are so great. I felt really crappy about this last night, and now I feel empowered. Thanks Hellobee!</p> <p>P.S. anybody wanna trade MILs? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-191223 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 09:54:19 +0000 looch 191223@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can only imagine how difficult it is to try to reason with someone who threatened suicide. At this point, the only suggestion I'd have is family therapy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-191220 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 09:53:42 +0000 Shutterbug 191220@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So sorry that this is the relationship with your MIL that you're stuck with. I agree with the others that you shouldn't have to support her slacker lifestyle and concern for how she'll look to her friends (!), especially since she treats you like crap and won't acknowledge her future grandchild.</p> <p>I think your best bet is to keep all communication with her through your DH, and make sure that he knows how important it is to not blame you for anything, even indirectly. So if she complains to you, say 'you'll have to talk to your son about that' or 'you really should be having this conversation with your son'. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-191202 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 09:42:43 +0000 MamaMoose 191202@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: Yes agree. Sorry I was using the royal "you" that OliviaOblivia and her hubs could hopefully show a united front on this.. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-191192 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 09:33:39 +0000 oliviaoblivia 191192@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH has really been working on standing up to her, but he definitely still has a ways to go. Unfortunately she is super manipulative and spent the two weeks before our wedding threatening to kill herself.</p> <p>Lord, I write these things down and they sound too horrible to be true.</p> <p>@Grace: And yes a stipend because she is too old (56) to work. She's never had a job and won't start now. It would be beneath her. (rolls eyes) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-191174 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 09:25:40 +0000 mrsjyw 191174@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>UGH, i'm so sorry for you to be in this situation, i'm in the boat that your DH needs to step up and set boundaries. you should NOT have to do this for her. AT ALL. that, in my opinion, does not make you a bad person. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-191157 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 09:17:53 +0000 mrbee 191157@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was thinking and I wonder if she can only treat you this way because your DH isn't setting boundaries... </p> <p>@MamaMoose: I agree, but I think her DH should be the one setting the boundaries with his own mom! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-191098 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 08:49:06 +0000 MamaMoose 191098@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ooooo this makes me mad. Do NOT give in. Inform her that you are saving for a baby on the way and simply can not afford to pay for her room, and you are not comfortable sharing. She will either have to come up with a way to pay for herself, or decline the invitation to the wedding. I'm sorry but she is not your husband's responsibility. And she's never going to change her ways if your husband doesn't stop giving in to her every demand. And as some of the others said... she already treats you like crap so it's not like it can get any worse because you said no to her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-191035 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 08:04:06 +0000 Grace 191035@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: Your MIL wanted a living stipend?!?!?! What...how...what??? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-190834 Fri, 15 Jun 2012 00:47:27 +0000 Sweet T 190834@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: I just wanted to say that I feel your pain because I have a monster in law too. Wish I had some good suggestions! I say put your foot down but I know from experience that it doesn't always work. =/ Hope it all works out!</p> <p>@mrbee: I think you need to have a talk with my husband! His mom sucks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-190553 Thu, 14 Jun 2012 20:58:53 +0000 oliviaoblivia 190553@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@chopsuey119: damn right! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-190548 Thu, 14 Jun 2012 20:56:01 +0000 chopsuey 190548@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: Do not spend $750 on a room for her! I hate her!<br /> You shouldn't have to deal with this stress. Have your DH tell her it ain't happening. You guys can help with a room (at a cheaper hotel or chip in so she can get her own room, but you need to put your foot down). You guys are going to be a family of 3 soon. You and baby come first! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mil-dilemma-vent#post-190542 Thu, 14 Jun 2012 20:53:56 +0000 oliviaoblivia 190542@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just absolutely hate this relationship. The money for the room isn't that big a deal, it's just the principle ya' know. She won't acknowledge the baby and yet thinks its okay to ask for $750.</p> <p>I don't think my parents would ever consider asking to share a room with us. But if they needed to stay with us it would be ok. </p>