https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 12 Apr 2026 02:31:53 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-82166 Sat, 25 Feb 2012 11:20:16 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 82166@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>BTW as someone who went back to work 3 days after our baby was born, I can definitively say that the more leave you can get, the better... especially if this is your first. It was really hard to go back yesterday. Do you have sick leave and vacation that you can use too? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-82165 Sat, 25 Feb 2012 11:18:13 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 82165@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My work covers a regular maternity leave for adoption... Is this not similar? Perhaps your situation is just unusual and they don't know how to handle it? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-82159 Sat, 25 Feb 2012 11:07:43 +0000 pastemoo 82159@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not getting paid leave either, but I agree with the PPs, you should get 12 weeks unpaid leave with the baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-47298 Thu, 05 Jan 2012 14:06:52 +0000 Lozza 47298@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, that's crappy. I did not need 8 weeks to recover physically from a vaginal delivery. (I mean, it's not like I was going to go run a marathon or pose for Victoria's Secret or anything, but you get my point). The reason I needed leave was because I was up every two hours feeding a baby, and spent the time in between those feedings cleaning a baby and rocking a baby and dressing a baby and obsessing over whether said baby was still breathing and at an acceptable temperature. (Don't go crazy with that last part like I did)<br /> That would seriously tick me off.<br /> Do you have an understanding supervisor and/or HR department? They may not be able to give you the full benefits you deserve (the same ones as ladies expelling a baby from their nether or middle regions), but maybe you could at least get some additional flexibility in your hours, or ability to work from home, or something like that? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-47246 Thu, 05 Jan 2012 13:43:08 +0000 akire 47246@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Lozza - 8 weeks for natural delivery, 12 weeks for C- Section, and then they can go on long term disability at 50-75%of pay for up to a total of 6 months. This is because it's a medical condition. For anyone not birthing, it's considered "bonding time", and only 2 weeks are paid. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-47199 Thu, 05 Jan 2012 13:27:02 +0000 Lozza 47199@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Two weeks paid leave sounds great to me- all I got was my FMLA unpaid leave!<br /> How much leave would you get if you were to deliver a baby yourself? That's the part that I find weird- if you are acquiring a baby, I don't think leave policies should be any different whether you're birthing one, adopting, going through surrogacy, etc.! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-47194 Thu, 05 Jan 2012 13:22:28 +0000 akire 47194@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks @Tequerio21! And yes, it's very expensive (which is a big part of why the unpaid leave freaked me out). On the plus side, the expenses aren't all upfront. There's a big chunk for the lawyer and the IVF, then the surrogate gets paid monthly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-47154 Thu, 05 Jan 2012 12:53:31 +0000 mrs. wagon 47154@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My old company only gave 2 weeks paid leave for any new parent. Mother, father, delivered baby, surrogacy, adoption, etc. The people I knew who had babies took vacation time and unpaid time to amount to about 3 months off.</p> <p>Yes, makes you wanna live in Canada!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-47149 Thu, 05 Jan 2012 12:49:38 +0000 Mrsbells 47149@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>most companies dont really give that much time off but like pp have said you should still be covered by FMLA because like any new mom you will have a newborn baby that needs care and attention. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-47126 Thu, 05 Jan 2012 12:36:57 +0000 tequiero21 47126@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>good luck @akire!!!! sorry you aren't able to go through the pregnancy yourself, but so glad you're able to utilize other options! i really hope you get twins! (so you don't have to go through this again haha) *crossing fingers*</p> <p>just curious, is it as expensive to do surrogacy as it is to do ivf? i imagine it'll be more expensive. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-46631 Wed, 04 Jan 2012 20:49:18 +0000 akire 46631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks, Chopsuey! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-46580 Wed, 04 Jan 2012 19:24:47 +0000 chopsuey 46580@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>wow. so exciting!! :) keep us posted on how many sticky babies you have :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-46578 Wed, 04 Jan 2012 19:23:24 +0000 akire 46578@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for the advice. I can get FMLA unpaid, but I'm not sure that's a viable option. However, since I'm a workaholic who never uses vacation days, it looks like I can cobble together two months if I include those 2 paid weeks.<br /> Really appreciate the support. Makes us wish we all had Canadian Mat Leave! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-46414 Wed, 04 Jan 2012 15:57:05 +0000 twinmama 46414@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't get any paid maternity leave, and neither did my SIL who has a fantastic job. Her position was guaranteed for 3 months via FMLA, but she had to use a combo of vacation and sick time to get any $ while on mat leave.</p> <p>I would ask what leave options you have, unpaid, and ask both HR and your immediate supervisor. My SIL found that her boss was willing to approve an extra month beyond what FMLA covered. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-46406 Wed, 04 Jan 2012 15:50:54 +0000 heffalump 46406@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That sounds pretty crazy. No mother wants to leave their two week old for work. I would also check out fmla. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-46402 Wed, 04 Jan 2012 15:47:57 +0000 kiddosc 46402@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are still eligible for FMLA benefits. This will give you up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave. My company and many others don't even have paid leave for when you deliver your own children, I'd be happy with even 2 weeks. I'll have 8 weeks of vacation time saved up that I will use when the baby is born. Any time I take after that will be unpaid. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-46398 Wed, 04 Jan 2012 15:45:55 +0000 yoursilverlining 46398@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Are you a FMLA-eligible employee? If so, I would speak to HR, as I don't see how that wouldn't be covered. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-46394 Wed, 04 Jan 2012 15:44:41 +0000 MamaMoose 46394@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That seems absurd to me. Yes, part of maternity leave is about healing after the birth, but part of it is about bonding with your new baby!! At my company you get the exact same maternity leave whether you deliver the child yourself, use a surrougate, or adopt. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/minimal-leave-for-surrogacy#post-46369 Wed, 04 Jan 2012 15:28:30 +0000 akire 46369@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi Bees!<br /> My husband and I are in the process of gestational surrogacy right now due to a heart condition of mine that prevents me from having a safe childbirth. We are one month out from implantation (fingers crossed), and I just found out that I will only get a two week paid leave once the baby(or twins) is born. This seems insane, but the more I look, that's standard for anyone who has not given birth. Have any of you dealt with this? How did you handle?<br /> Thanks! </p>