https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 14 Apr 2026 20:36:56 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2281875 Thu, 03 Sep 2015 15:25:06 +0000 lemondrop 2281875@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We did an evaluation at the school district for delays since my MIL was concerned and C was too old for EI. He did qualify for free preschool and speech therapy through the school district. Ultimately I wasn't very worried about his delays, he's ahead in other things and all kids learn at different paces. It's a great program and he's getting better at communication, so I'm happy we did it. Ultimately, they are only 3 and still have so much to learn and explore! Sometimes it feels like there are way too many high expectations for them- we aren't sending them off to college anytime soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2281792 Thu, 03 Sep 2015 14:35:15 +0000 MamaG 2281792@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@loveisstrange: While biting isn't common at this age, I think it still does occur as a defensive mechanism. LO is 4 and her BFF bit her twice in the last two weeks of summer preschool program. In both cases she had done something to upset/anger him and that was his reaction. </p> <p>Emotions are very hard still for these kids and sometimes the only way they know how to let it out is physically.</p> <p>It sounds like overall the teacher isn't terribly concerned. </p> <p>I wanted to add that LO just started her pre-K program and while she does know her teachers names she doesn't know all of her classmates names. And I've noticed her verbal communication regress, she's really having a hard time organizing her thoughts lately and I think it's because she's overloaded and tired. At times she can really struggle to form a complete sentence. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2281672 Thu, 03 Sep 2015 13:04:43 +0000 loveisstrange 2281672@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ldh112: Yeah, I feel you there. I think that ADD/ADHD are horrendously over-diagnosed. She's 3! I feel like a good amount of that behavior is fairly normal.</p> <p>@BabyBoecksMom: Yeah, this was another kid. Apparently, the kid took her chalk? I've honestly never thought about her love language.... huh. I'll have to consider that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2281559 Thu, 03 Sep 2015 11:38:48 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 2281559@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@loveisstrange: Yikes! No fun :-( My daughter bit her teacher because she pulled her off the fence on the playground after several warnings to stop climbing it. When I talked to the pediatrician about it, he said that if she had bit another kid, he wouldn't be worried, but he was concerned that it was a teacher (apparently it's not common to bite authority figures?)</p> <p>What's your LO's love language? DD1's is touch, and even when she's in the worst possible meltdown, I find that most of the time, she just needs a hug and someone to tell her it's going to be ok. </p> <p>@erinpye: good input - I'll have to look into that for mine as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2281554 Thu, 03 Sep 2015 11:33:18 +0000 ldh112 2281554@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah, it drives me crazy that people just want to medicate kids without assessing properly and waiting to see a pattern of behavior/concerns. When I see that, it makes me think that teachers are just kind of lazy and don't want to do the work to meet students' individual needs! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2281419 Thu, 03 Sep 2015 10:13:18 +0000 BananaPancakes 2281419@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@loveisstrange: I think that definitely an odd comment this early in the school year! I honestly don't think at 3 years old, its even possible to make that assumption until someone has been around your child for months. Starting a new class is a huge adjustment at this age and some kids need more time than others. I'd disregard it until she's much further into the school year. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2281407 Thu, 03 Sep 2015 10:04:34 +0000 loveisstrange 2281407@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Apparently, her teacher didn't just bring this up. DH asked her about it and that's how it got started. He's apparently concerned that she does't know the other kids' names. I can't decide whether to take him seriously, because I feel like he's been paranoid about her and her development since she was a baby. He's always looking for something wrong.</p> <p>I talked a bit to her teacher this morning and she said that she is mainly worried about her verbally. She thinks that she has a hard time expressing herself verbally sometimes. She really is working trying to find ways to help her.</p> <p>@ldh112: I don't at all feel comfortable medicating her, especially for something so easily misdiagnosed and not at this young age. I don't honestly think she has ADHD. I went to college to be a teacher (although I am not, I dropped that part of my degree) and my knee-jerk reaction was to assume that that's what she was trying to say without freaking me out, since Ive been through the teacher training for this stuff.</p> <p>@HLK208: Thanks for your reply. :/ I can't figure out if Im concerned or not. DH is.</p> <p>@erinpye: Maybe we should get her screened sooner. Ive suspected she is for a while. Just the way she learns and processes things reminds me a lot of me and my brother. We have two very good gifted magnet schools in our city that we are looking into getting her into for kindergarten. We live in a de-segregation district for the city schools, so we aren't eligible for their preschool program. :/ I will wall you. Im definitely interested in how the process works.</p> <p>Thank you all for your input! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280818 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 18:53:56 +0000 erinpye 2280818@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you're gifted, chances are she is too. Have her screened with a Weschler test by a PsyD. We used the WPPSI-iv because S was only 2 yrs 9 mos at the time, and I think that's still the one they would use until the age of 5 or 6, when they would use the WISC. It gave us SO MUCH insight into her behaviors and needs, and I really recommend it. Gifted kids are mislabeled as ADHD so very often-- I really doubt that's the issue. Feel free to wall me if you'd like to talk a bit more, since our girls are the same age, and I have some similar experience.</p> <p>Eta: my gifted kid is aggressive when she's bored, frustrated, or overstimulated (sensory OE). She's bitten others. It sucks and I'm sorry you're struggling. It can be really overwhelming. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280760 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 16:52:01 +0000 HLK208 2280760@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with pp's that those comments do sound odd. Our old preschool didn't do any assessments until 2-3 months into the school year so they could get to know the kids and the kids would be familiar with the teachers.</p> <p>B really didn't remember other kids names until the school year was half way done. And he also bit another child 😁 so those things sound "normal" for the age, in my opinion. Not trying to down play it - but I would get an evaluation if you're personally concerned. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280759 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 16:51:50 +0000 ldh112 2280759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@loveisstrange: Is there a guidance counselor at the center? PreK may be young for having a GC, but typically screening goes through their office unless you want to have her screened elsewhere (PCP, child therapist, etc). I think she is a bit young for the screening (just my opinion!), but talking with guidance/PCP/therapist may help give you some support as you work on behavior concerns :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280747 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 16:39:16 +0000 ldh112 2280747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@loveisstrange: I worked in a preK/Kindergarten center as a therapist last year. typically I would tell my teachers and parents not to diagnose children with ADHD before Kindergarten (at least). I think it is such a transitionary time for kiddos and, unless its an extreme case where the child is destructive/hurting children out of poor impulse control, I would just keep my eye on it and maybe research some parenting tools for working on impulse control or seek out a child therapist to give you some tips. Best practice for ADHD is a combo of meds + behavior therapy and I really was not comfortable seeing my preK clients medicated, though a couple were on meds prior to being assigned to me. </p> <p>Also, if teachers were concerned about ADHD, it was recommended that they administer a scale to assess symptoms. Has she done anything like this? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280729 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 16:19:36 +0000 loveisstrange 2280729@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs Green Grass: @BabyBoecksMom: Annnnd apparently, she bit a kid today.</p> <p>I don't even know what to do about it at this point. I feel kind of blind-sided. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280695 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 15:54:43 +0000 Mrs Green Grass 2280695@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son is almost three and we are one month into our preschool transition and it's been pretty rough and is taking longer than I thought it would. But I see a little bit of progress every week.</p> <p>Honestly I find the teacher's comments a little strange. I also wonder what they are "teaching" at that age. Maybe it's not a good fit. But I think you'll need more time in order to really find out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280693 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 15:53:47 +0000 loveisstrange 2280693@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BabyBoecksMom: Yeah, the teacher said that she can be rowdy at nap times (she hasn't napped in like 2 years), has been having accidents, and was "handsy" with some of the other kids. It makes me feel better that someone else's munchkin went through something similar. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280687 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 15:49:08 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 2280687@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@loveisstrange: W regressed big time when we moved her from daycare to "school". (Like, kicking/biting the teachers, waking all the kids up at nap, potty accidents, etc). I want to say that after a month it started to get better (and MUCH better by 2 months). I just kept talking to her teachers a lot and trying to find ways that they could make her more comfortable. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280676 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 15:43:26 +0000 loveisstrange 2280676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BabyBoecksMom: I think it really may just be a rougher transition for her. She's been having a lot of extra potty accidents too. :/ She seems to like school, but maybe she's just good at hiding it. This is really her first time in a structured learning environment.</p> <p>@honeybear: Yeah. The kid can already do basic math, she knows all this random stuff that I had no idea she knew. I think maybe school might just be kind of boring for her and she just doesn't care. I'll definitely talk to her teacher. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280666 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 15:38:53 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 2280666@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds a lot like DD1. I would get more information from the teacher before reading too much into it. I know my girl is having a rough transition with her new teachers at daycare, but that doesn't mean that she's not making connections. She just has a hard time with big changes. </p> <p>If she doesn't know the teachers name, maybe it's just because it's not important to her right now? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280635 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 15:23:34 +0000 honeybear 2280635@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@loveisstrange: Yes, that makes sense and sounds very familiar and normal! I would talk to the teacher, but I wouldn't worry. The random repetition of things (not when an adult wants her to, but when she wants to) will likely keep going for a while. LO is 5 and he still does this a lot--it's pretty fun to watch! So will the stubborn refusal to answer questions/answering incorrectly on purpose, which can be uber frustrating, but is really just a sign that they've moved on to other more interesting things and we adults should too! :) It sounds like there isn't anything to be concerned about unless the school is not very flexible. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280444 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 12:22:59 +0000 loveisstrange 2280444@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Maysprout: She's going from a very play-based daycare to a real school setting, so Im sure the transition is hard for her.</p> <p>@honeybear: I will definitely ask her to give me more specifics about what she is concerned about. C is very independent and yes, I do believe she means making connections with the other kids. C is very smart, so Im not really worried about her academically. She does know things. She remembers lots of stuff and repeats it randomly all the time. She just tends to be very stubborn and not answer questions when you ask her. haha. Like, she knows what the color red is, she knows how to recognize it, she can tell you things that are red... but she may tell you it's purple if you point to an apple and ask what color it is. Does that make sense? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280379 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 11:23:35 +0000 honeybear 2280379@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would go back and get more information. I'm not sure that you need to read anything into her comments, but I would ask for clarification. What are they teaching that the teacher thinks she isn't absorbing? What are the teacher's concerns exactly and can she give you examples? I wouldn't interrogate her, but it sounds like she could be a little more specific.</p> <p>Three weeks isn't a long time to adjust to a new place and new people, so these could be real issues, or they could be entirely attributable to the adjustment period. Three year-olds are definitely still mastering their impulses and at least in my experience, they're also just starting to figure out how to engage with other people and children for longer periods of time/in more meaningful ways. It wouldn't necessarily bother me that she says she's not making connections, assuming she means with other children. Also, everyone needs to be left alone to do their own thing sometimes and some need more of it than others. That can look kind of strange in a group setting, but it isn't necessarily a sign of a problem. </p> <p>As for memorizing things, does she repeat things you've read/sung at home to you? I'll be honest, my feeling is that memorization should not be emphasized in preschool, so if she's simply not repeating back rhymes, stories, or songs when prompted, but sometimes repeats them when she's playing on her own, I wouldn't be worried. My LO would (and still does!) stealthily repeat new information during play. It sometimes comes out at unexpected times, so you might have to watch for it rather than try to prompt it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280273 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 10:05:06 +0000 Maysprout 2280273@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO started a new preschool a few months after she turned 3. I was surprised at how hard she took it. Our first parent teacher conference was basically she doesn't talk to anyone and just stays in her own world. Because she'd done fine at her old preschool we took it as needing to help her with the transition better. I walked her in and helped her with hellos instead of dropping her off. We tried to get a playdate with at least one classmate every week or two. I took her to her school playground instead of one slightly closer to our house to play. And just talked to her about her feelings more. My oldest, while definitely liking her imaginary world, is very social so it was surprising to hear how withdrawn she'd become in class. luckily she had much more positive feedback for the next conference. sounds like your LO is doing the opposite but sometimes I think those transitions are quite hard. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moms-with-los-with-adhd-gifted-or-similar#post-2280235 Wed, 02 Sep 2015 09:49:15 +0000 loveisstrange 2280235@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My almost 3.5 year old is in week 3 of preschool. This morning her teacher told me that she is worried that she is too impulsive to make connections and she is concerned about her memorizing and truly absorbing the things that she is teaching.</p> <p>To me, that sounds like she is trying to hint that she thinks C might have ADHD or a similar issue. It's not outside the realm of possibility. My brother has ADHD and is (most likely, they didn't really diagnose it when he was a kid) on the autism spectrum. He and I both considered "gifted" and tend to have idiosyncrasies and difficulties relating to other people sometimes. I know that "over excitability" tends to be a by-product of giftedness and high intelligence as well as a marker of an issue like ADHD. I do think she takes after me and my brother in this and we plan to have her screened next year in order to go to the magnet school we want to get her into.</p> <p>At this point, she doesn't even know her teacher's name or any of the name's of the kids in her class. However, in her daycare at the beginning of the year, she did. She used to come home talking about her little friend Alex all the time. Im not sure if this is really an issue with her or an issue with the school not really being the right fit for her. She asked me this morning to go back to her "old school". The preschool is the early childhood center run by our district.</p> <p>Any guidance? How would I go about maybe getting her screened for ADHD and the like, to rule it out? </p>