https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 08 May 2026 10:38:02 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503557 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 17:41:34 +0000 danda 2503557@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: she is young so she doesn't charge much - therefore we pay her the same we would for babysitting. Our actual babysitter who is a daycare teacher gets much more. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503552 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 17:36:38 +0000 winniebee 2503552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: with our mothers helper I paid one 10/h (she was a freshman) and her sister 12/h (college freshman). I didn't leave the younger one alone with kids but the older one I did. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503548 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 17:21:22 +0000 gingerbebe 2503548@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: I have paid her the same rate whether I'm there or not. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503541 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 17:11:49 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2503541@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: it's the same rate regardless of what I do. She's still here doing work of some sort. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503540 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 17:09:19 +0000 Foodnerd81 2503540@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Follow up question- do you pay as much as you would a regular babysitter where you are leaving the house? I'm guessing yes since sometimes you do leave?<br /> @oliviaoblivia: @gingerbebe: @danda: @winniebee: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503537 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 17:06:02 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2503537@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our nanny is a friend of one of DH's friend's nanny's friend.<br /> We have her two days, for four hours. She's seriously amazing. Right now since she's new we're kind of tag teaming house chores and childcare so the girls can get used to her. Slowly I'll step away a bit more so I can run errands by myself and go to appointments.<br /> My house is immaculate for the first time in forever and we've had real meals every day for the past two weeks. I can actually breathe and take a minute to sit down without feeling regret that I'm not folding laundry or cleaning something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503516 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 16:41:37 +0000 youboots 2503516@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I take T to daycare for 4 hours 2x a week. They staff based on need 1x a mo and I don't have to go the same days. So weeks when DH travels or I have a big projects like taxes I can take her more. When we are traveling or have other plans there's no commitment. It works great for us. I can go to appointments or grocery shopping without my girl which is awesome for both of us- plus she gets to be social and have other caregivers. If we had not found this place I would have hired someone from my 4-H club or a family member. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503507 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 16:29:15 +0000 gingerbebe 2503507@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH is gone every other Saturday (he's up at 6am and comes home like 12 hours later), I'm 8 months pregnant, and I've got a high-energy 18 month old toddler, so I book a mommy's helper for a 3 hour block during those days.</p> <p>DS cries and is clingy any time a new person comes to the house, but he eventually warms up to the person within 30 minutes to an hour if I leave the scene. Generally, I will stick around for the first 15-20 minutes to go over instructions and deal with the first of his whining and crying and then say BYE and leave. He's still young enough that I can just slip into my bedroom or den and he forgets I'm around if I stay quiet, but I imagine you'd have to actually leave the house for an older child.</p> <p>Right now, I'm either organizing/cleaning my bedroom in preparation for the baby, doing computer-related tasks, or I'm taking a nap/laying down while the sitter takes DS to the park, plays with toys in the house, or they run around the backyard playing games - physical stuff I'm having a harder time managing. If I need to run an errand, I could leave and do that too. The sitter does not go anywhere with my son that requires driving, but we both preferred that arrangement. She just walks him to the park in our stroller or they play around our house.</p> <p>The sitter will wash DS up, get him changed if he's dirty from the park, and then usually leave by DS' lunch time. I'll feed him and play with him a little while and then put him down for nap, during which I can also rest. Once he's awake, I do quiet play for the rest of the afternoon, like playing blocks, reading books together on the recliner, and some screen time. Then I get dinner together and hopefully at that point DH will be home to take over. </p> <p>Once the baby is born, I imagine it will be similar, except I'll be taking care of the baby's stuff while the helper hangs out with the toddler. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503249 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:52:02 +0000 danda 2503249@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have a 13 year old who comes over if she's free when my husband travels. She comes right when we are finishing dinner and immediately starts playing with my 2.5 year old so I am able to feed the baby/get the baby to bed. She isn't able to be authoritative enough with my strong-willed girl to get her in bed, so after I finish with the baby, then I take my daughter and the teenager starts tidying up, folding laundry, and/or getting bottles of milk prepped for daycare. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503225 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:41:25 +0000 Foodnerd81 2503225@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: that example is really helpful, thanks. Maybe I will look at care.com. Have to talk to dh first. He also is going to have to travel for work at some point so having someone already lined up for a few hours a week would be good. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503223 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:39:52 +0000 winniebee 2503223@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: you might be able to find someone on sitter city! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503221 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:38:44 +0000 Anagram 2503221@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you are worried about LO1 being super attached to you--ask your nanny to take the girls outside to the park or on a walk (have her take both so you get a real break)--but YOU leave the house first, so LO can feel sad and get the crying out at home. And then once she's over your departure, the nanny can take them out, and you can go back in and do whatever you want at home--alone! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503215 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:36:20 +0000 Anagram 2503215@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: care.com. Seriously. That's where I found my new (amazing!) nanny. I first posted asking for recommendations in my local mommy group, which is super active with nanny recommendations. I only interviewed 3 ladies and hired one, and she was a disaster. SO we let her go after a month and I tried care.com. I got literally 200 responses, I narrowed it down to maybe 8 that seemed viable and emailed some questions. Based on answers, I called a few and eliminated a couple just based on the phone conversations.</p> <p>We interviewed 4 in person, and 2 were just above-and-beyond amazing, so we did (paid) trial days with me there. And then I picked one, and she's been amazing.</p> <p>There are a lot of people on care.com that are looking for just a few hours a week to supplement another part time job.</p> <p>As far as duties: What's great about our new nanny is that she will just take over, in a really engaging way so the girls aren't looking for mommy. The second I walk in the door, she's taking LO1s shoes off, washing her hands to get daycare germs off, asking her if she wants a snack. If her "time" isn't up yet, she'll go ahead and feed LO2 a bottle if it's time, even though I'm home, so I get a chance to change my clothes and eat a snack myself. She does all the girls' laundry every Friday and puts it away, she organizes their drawers and their diaper supply bins, she organizes their toys. She's really great.</p> <p>If I were SAH and getting a mother's helper, I would try to set a specific schedule, 10-15 hours a week, and give them specific duties. </p> <p>Example: You want someone 12-5pm M, W, F. From 12-2, you will be totally gone by yourself running errands or doing whatever the hell you want--taking a nap in your room if you want, and she'll have both kids. From 2-5, she'll have one kid, and you can take turns having 1 on 1 time with the other kid going out to the park, or you can ask the nanny to take one kid out for a walk while you stay home with the other. And then ask her to empty diaper trash and do baby laundry once a week. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503209 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:33:19 +0000 Foodnerd81 2503209@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@winniebee: anyone with kids lives out of the city. But the local moms group is pretty active and maybe someone has someone in the neighborhood they can recommend. I just want to make sure I benefit from it and it's not just her folding laundry while I breastfeed and the toddler climbs all over me or something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503206 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:31:16 +0000 hellobeeboston 2503206@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: haha, it is very 'burb-ish.... thats one perk not being in the city anymore! lots of babysitters. ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503169 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:15:53 +0000 winniebee 2503169@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a mother's helper (family friend) for two hours twice a week when DS2 was born, for periods of time (maybe from 1-3 months and then from 6-8 months). The helper was in charge of the toddler at that time. When the baby was younger, the helper was in charge of the toddler - did art, played in play room, etc, basically while I folded laundry or caught up on stuff at home. When the baby was older, my toddler was in a program then and I would use the time to get my haircut or work out, etc, without the baby!</p> <p>What about the teenage or college age child of someone your husband works with? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503163 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:13:06 +0000 Foodnerd81 2503163@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hellobeeboston: that sounds perfect. I don't know any local teenagers though. It sounds like such a nice suburban thing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503159 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:11:43 +0000 Foodnerd81 2503159@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Champagne: the local preschool starts at 2 years 9 months and requires them to be potty trained, which she is not. They do have a toddler program but it was full day at least 3 days a week, which I didn't want plus is hard to justify cost wise when I stay at home. She will start preschool in the fall hopefully (shortly after she turns 3). I wish they had a more part time option for younger kids! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503157 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:11:28 +0000 hellobeeboston 2503157@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I use a mothers helper (my neighbor across the street who is 14!) maybe every other week if my DH is going to be home late. I basically have her take charge of my 3 year old so I can get the baby to sleep... Otherwise my 3yo is left alone (usually with a movie or the iPad) while I get the baby down which usually takes 30 minutes.... So it's nice because LO loves her and they play the whole time, I'll also have her help with making sure LO has dinner.</p> <p>I've only started using her since baby brother came along but it's a big help and keeps me sane and I like that LO has fun playing with her... It works out because it's after school and just a couple hours here &amp; there and she can walk across the yard - so if you could find someone super local that would be ideal! My sister has done the same and it's just for a couple hours every few days and it's been awesome. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503151 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:07:24 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 2503151@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe preschool? Our local preschool has a toddler program starting at 18 months. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/mothers-helper-1#post-2503140 Tue, 22 Mar 2016 13:03:08 +0000 Foodnerd81 2503140@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If you have a mother's helper or part time baby sitter, what do they do? What do you do while they are there? How did you find them? </p> <p>I SAH with my 2.5 yo and 3 month old. I'm losing my mind some days (most days) with the constant demands on me. The older one does a 2 hour drop off class at the gym once a week and that's it. DH works fairly long hours (like he is rarely home before 7 but usually home by 8). </p> <p>I'm trying to figure out a short term solution to help me stay sane. The toddler is in a big mommy phase and throws tantrums when DH tries to do things like give her a bath or change her diaper, although she's finally gotten back to a point where she will do fun things with him at least. I'm wondering if getting a babysitter or something a few hours a week would help and how that works. </p>