Hellobee Boards Topic: Moving in with father in law to save $.

Hellobee Boards Topic: Moving in with father in law to save $. https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 22 May 2026 01:08:02 +0000 heffalump on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59373 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:56:37 +0000 heffalump 59373@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @JustlikeHeaven: Glad I could help! DpeachLu on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59344 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:46:49 +0000 DpeachLu 59344@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @artbee: Thank you for sharing this! :) heffalump on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59339 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:43:35 +0000 heffalump 59339@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We are not "well off" either. We do own a home, but could never have purchased it without help of my parents. They've also furnished my LO's room along with some other pieces for our home. My dad buys all of my LO's formula. Not only did they pay for our wedding, but they gave us a certain amount and said spend what you want and keep the rest, so if we eloped we'd have a crap load of money in the bank. Instead we just had a very budget wedding, and used the rest on a downpayment for our house. They do a lot for us, because they can and because they want to. I'm not embarrassed at all! My husband works hard and does make a good living, enough to support me and our baby. But we wouldn't have all of what we do if it weren't for my parent's help. I hope I can do the same for my LO one day. I'm used to my parents being generous. They paid for my college, they bought my first (and only) car with the money I saved them from getting scholarships, their rule is always that their kids and kid's friends/spouses aren't allowed to buy dinner when we're out with them until we make more money then them. Which will never happen. My husband isn't used to all of that, and he felt weird at first excepting help from them. But he's learned to just be appreciative and happy about it. DpeachLu on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59328 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:38:23 +0000 DpeachLu 59328@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My father in law was kind of absent in my husbands life while growing up... and I do think he is lonely going through a divorce... so I believe just wants to "make it up" to his son + not feel so lonely. So - their relationship can go either way during this.. since they really only spend about 5-10 hours together a month now.. going out to dinner or sporting events and whatnot. DpeachLu on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59315 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:35:03 +0000 DpeachLu 59315@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @aunt pol: no utility bills, just rent.. but the rent would be ours in the end... He basically just wants to see us putting in 800-1000 a month into a savings account for "rent" which we will then be able to use at the end of the year for a down payment. lilteacherbee on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59313 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:34:48 +0000 lilteacherbee 59313@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think you should do whatever you feel will help you in the end. DH and I lived with his parents for 5 months right after we got married and I'd do it again if we ever needed to. I love my in-laws and they genuinely wanted to help us. Our main issue was that we couldn't find a rental home in our very rural area. I know a lot of people who have moved in with their parents while saving money to buy a house, get on their feet, etc. If you're comfortable with it, I'd say go for it! aunt pol on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59306 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:31:45 +0000 aunt pol 59306@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @mediagirl: they would still be paying rent, though. Although of course the utility bills etc should be a lot more affordable. OP- I'd think long and hard about it: there are very good arguments for and against. My father lives with us- he's 81 and while generally v healthy, suffers from depression so can't live alone. My husband finds it very very difficult, even though both of them are quite easygoing. I find it hard to be kind of stuck in the middle sometimes between their competing needs. DH often says how much he misses the days when we lived alone: it can be very hard to find "normal" quiet together time. Of course your situation and mine are very different, and a year is not a long time to spend growing your finances and getting a handle on things. I imagine the relationship between your DH and his Dad would determine how easy the year is. DpeachLu on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59300 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:29:30 +0000 DpeachLu 59300@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Thank you everyone :) DpeachLu on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59299 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:29:20 +0000 DpeachLu 59299@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I guess Im not sad about it. I think it is worth it. A little more embarrased to explain to all of our friends and or family members that we are moving in with father in law - married and with a baby! & yes thats the goal pay off bills (luckily were paid off enough to where we should be done or close to done within a year!) banana on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59289 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:26:00 +0000 banana 59289@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I would totally move in with my FIL if I was in the same boat. What a great opportunity to save money! And with a new baby on the way, it'll really be nice to not have to stress so much about money. You'll already be tired and stressed about the baby! I don't see anything wrong with moving in with him and actually applaud you for thinking about your family and your baby first, over your own comfort. Rubies on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59288 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:25:45 +0000 Rubies 59288@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Oh dear - are you sad about this? Have you and your husband decided that this is what you are going to do? Many MANY people (some of my friends included) end up moving in with their parents when the baby comes because of financial difficulty. I feel your FIL is being kind and generous...Is he pressuring you to move in? Or, was it simply an offer? Whatever financial mistakes you and your husband made prior to marriage is in the past and you're working towards fixing it. Try not to beat yourself up. I hope things work out for you! mediagirl on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59283 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:23:11 +0000 mediagirl 59283@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My advice: Totally move in with your father-in-law! It sounds like he understands your situation and WANTS to help you. When you move in, put all of the money you're currently putting towards rent to your bills. Figure out how much that will be and how long it will mean you are paying them off. Would you mind living with him longer than a year? I'd say, stay with him until you have paid off your bills. Don't plan on buying a house until you have 20% down is my other suggestion... You're YOUNG! You'll get through this and be fine. It's AWESOME that your FIL has offered you this opportunity!! DpeachLu on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59279 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:20:59 +0000 DpeachLu 59279@https://boards.hellobee.com/ btw... I am sort of venting. not sure exactly what I am looking for by posting this. comments, tips, suggestions ... ?! lol. I dont know if there is much for all of you to say! DpeachLu on "Moving in with father in law to save $." https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/moving-in-with-father-in-law-to-save#post-59276 Wed, 25 Jan 2012 19:19:01 +0000 DpeachLu 59276@https://boards.hellobee.com/ So, I'm about to get a little bit personal especially because I feel like my husband and I are the only ones in this situation on this entire site. everyone just seems so well off. Realistically and honestly my husband and I arent. We are both in our mid 20's and made some big financial mistakes BEFORE marriage.. so we brought them in to our marriage. & have been working to repair all of that for the last 3 years. & little by little we are getting there :). We dont drive fancy cars and we dont own property yet. We rent a one bedroom condo. About a half of my monthly salary goes to bills and same goes for my husband (he pays rent all on his own). AND NOW WE ADD A BABY TO THE MIX. That is due to come April 8th! My father in law - who is going through a divorce has recently offered us to "sacrifice and move in with him for a year." He lives in a three bedroom home and is asking us to pay him rent that he will put away for us and save until the year is up. We will then have enough to use as a down payment towards our very own condo or home. I am not sure how to take it. Do we move in, how else would we save for our own home - especially with a newborn!? Then again .. will it make us feel bad in the end because we are grown adults and didnt do this on our very own without parental help? Moving in would = having to have our baby in the same room as us for that year. No nursery for her. However we would have our own restroom, shower. Which puts me a little at ease with privacy of walking out of the shower into our room. (it will all be in the same room) :( & That my FellowHellowbee'rs is our situation - sad but real.