https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 21 Jun 2026 05:21:08 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1625303 Fri, 09 May 2014 16:40:34 +0000 Boheme 1625303@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sending you good thoughts and hoping you go into labor soon. You've got this :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1625227 Fri, 09 May 2014 16:11:20 +0000 oliviaoblivia 1625227@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thinking of you and J. I hope things move along naturally for you soon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1625152 Fri, 09 May 2014 15:41:16 +0000 Mrs. Blue 1625152@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@junebugmama: I don't suppose it's possible to have another u/s, is it? I would be very frustrated if the u/s estimate was the only reason they would not induce. Personally, I would generally go with what my doctors recommended, but since I had a baby whose last u/s estimate was 33% off in a situation that the doctors KNEW was risky and were carefully monitoring, I can't say that I have any faith whatsoever in ultrasound estimates . . . </p> <p>Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1624929 Fri, 09 May 2014 14:18:07 +0000 sea_bass 1624929@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What in the world?? I had to re read your post as I presumed it was a VBAC thread. They want to cut open your abdomen because they think your baby is too big for you to birth...?! </p> <p>Wow. Just wow. </p> <p>Good luck. I know you're a doula so you've probably tried these but acupressure and moxa see a lot of success for natural induction near me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1624871 Fri, 09 May 2014 14:02:28 +0000 artsyfartsy 1624871@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree that a mothers intuition on baby's size is more accurate. Everyone estimated at to be over 9 lbs and I felt sure that he was only between 8-9. Sure enough he was 8lbs 9oz. I can't give you advice though...I ended up with a c section after a failed induction. I wanted a natural vaginal birth so badly but after mild complications kept arising I just put it into my doctors hands. </p> <p>I hope you get the birth you want! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1624837 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:53:48 +0000 plantains 1624837@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@junebugmama: it sounds like there is a lot to be desired in your ob's bedside manner. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1624798 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:45:27 +0000 ShootingStar 1624798@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I realize that the options the OB is giving you don't seem to make sense and that they are frustrating. And you're right, that would be and *is* the decision that I made :). My birth experience sucked and in no way was anything like what I wanted except for the most important part - I had a healthy baby at the end of it. Birth experience is important, but the baby doesn't care how they come into the world, only the mother does.</p> <p>@BakerBee: As much experience as she has, she's not a doctor or a midwife. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1624767 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:38:12 +0000 Beyond2 1624767@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@junebugmama: I just had my second one, one week ago and I'd highly recommend the option ;-) ;-). Seriously though, good luck with your birth regardless of how it happens. A woman's body is an amazing thing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1624761 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:36:24 +0000 MamaMoose 1624761@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>While it does seem like an induction now is a middle ground I can certainly understand that it's well within the OB's right to refuse to administer an intervention the he feels is not the safest option for you or your baby, regardless of your consent. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal/page/2#post-1624748 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:32:54 +0000 junebugmama 1624748@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Beyond2: Since I am a doula I actually know a lot of midwives. I reached out and now have had an offer to attend my home birth :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624741 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:30:30 +0000 Beyond2 1624741@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I see a Homebirth midwife who also has hospital rights. You wouldn't believe the number of women she has had switch to her at 36-39 weeks over situations similar to this. She is usually booked solid so she isn't always able to take on additional women with her already planned work load, but she is very helpful at offering them help in the situation. I'm not sure where you live or if Homebirth is even legal, but maybe you can find some Homebirth midwives to discuss the situation with? It might offer some alternatives even if they can't personally help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624736 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:29:29 +0000 coopsmama 1624736@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva: @petunia354: @Mae: Mae absolutely knew what I meant -- thank you for your clarification. I've edited my post to remove the controversial term. I'm typing with one hand while holding a crying teething 10 month old -- let's just say I am typing with the first words that come to mind. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624731 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:28:03 +0000 junebugmama 1624731@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@blackbird: I 100% understand that point of view. However, there are reasons why ACOG just changed their recommendations on size. It's because size has no higher risk of death than plain old birth itself </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624721 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:25:38 +0000 junebugmama 1624721@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septca: They estimated my first son at 7lbs 8oz and he was 9 lbs. So I don't trust u/s' all that much. However, there is one tech that I do know and all of her stats are right on. I'm a doula and work for hospital and we track their guesses vs. outcomes </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624718 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:25:15 +0000 blackbird 1624718@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well as a senior OB, who has seen his run of everything, his main concern is that you don't deliver a dead baby. That's his job. He has probably seen similar situations not go well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624713 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:24:04 +0000 Jenn23 1624713@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hope it all works out the way you want! What a big baby, you have there! I agree with others that what we would do in this situation isn't relevant. You do what you feel is best. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624702 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:22:13 +0000 septca 1624702@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@junebugmama: Your body, your choice, so I don't have an opinion on your situation, but I just wanted to let you know that I had an u/s late in my pregnancy by a trusted u/s tech and was told that I needed to think about having my baby early because she would be *at least* 9.5 pounds if I waited until 40 weeks. I thought that seemed off due to a variety of factors, but it really freaked me out. I naturally went into labor early and DD was born at 39 weeks at 7 lbs, 14 ounces - a FAR cry from 9+ pounds... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624700 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:20:59 +0000 anandam 1624700@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@junebugmama: I see the difference. Maybe smuggle out some sterile gloves and an amnihook and have DH sweep and break your membranes at home? But nobody wants to go rogue with their baby! You're not trying to be a renegade madwoman here., you just know you can birth a big baby, from experience. It's awful you can't sign some consent form to move forward in a way you're comfortable with. And that the doctors are controlling your midwife. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624697 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:20:37 +0000 coopsmama 1624697@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Silva: Not at all! We all make different medical choices for our individual situation and based on our comfort level and desire. It's awesome to have a wide scope of care - I just hate to see someone's desires dismissed in this way. I can see how you might find my wording to insinuate that but that's not what I meant at all -- sorry for my poor phrasing. I would advocate for any mother's choice in a birthing situation, whether an at home delivery or a scheduled elective c-section. :) </p> <p>(My irritation in this particular situation probably also stems from refusing a c-section with my own DS after a 36 hour non progressing labor and all went well and baby was never in distress and was considered large (9lbs +) birth weight... basically the OB said my choice was c-section and we went against that recommendation. I got treated like a bit of an idiot for my choice until all went well, much to the OB's surprise. She agreed afterwards we made the right call.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624693 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:19:04 +0000 junebugmama 1624693@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Woolly Mammoth: Yes except the risk is increasing on the other side of things as well. The risks need to be weighed here. The outcome of a failed induction, would be the same as a planned c-section. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624689 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:18:16 +0000 petunia354 1624689@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <br /> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624677 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:15:40 +0000 Mae 1624677@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Aimed: I think this only makes sense if an induction would be MORE risky than waiting for a natural birth. Baby is coming one way or another, and just because they feel something is not the best option doesn't mean they should refuse it if it is a better option than the alternative. </p> <p>@Silva: I don't think that is what she was saying at all. I think she was just saying there is a difference between being an educated patient who understands risks/benefits and can question and disagree with a judgment call of a doctor, vs. someone who has no knowledge and would be making decisions based only on doctor's judgment because they have nothing else to go on. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624667 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:14:22 +0000 junebugmama 1624667@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Aimed: @MrsTiz: @char54: @looch: </p> <p>Ok just to be very clear. The ob and the midwife walked into the room and said, you have 2 choices 1) you can have a c-section today or 2) you can wait and see if you go into labor on your own in the next week and then we have to let you try </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624665 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:13:26 +0000 Silva 1624665@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Aimed: thank you, you've said what i was trying to say much more clearly :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624663 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:12:48 +0000 Silva 1624663@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: She is refusing an intervention. Medicine isn't ala cart. If a doctor believes there are risks inherent in a certain intervention, he/she cannot just give them to you because you ask for them.<br /> I don't necessarily agree with this particular situation, as you are correct it isn't a black and white decision. But there is a reason behind the MDs decision, and I don't think its to call a bluff. According to the most recent ultrasound, the baby weighs too much to start an induction. If your blood levels were too high for a certain medication, you cannot just tell your doctor to give it anyway. They have to draw the cutoff somewhere. Its unfortunate to fall so close to a cutoff, but the doctor has a reason for making this decision, and its based on outcome based research regarding inductions, and likely also connected to the hospital liability policy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624660 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:12:05 +0000 Woolly Mammoth 1624660@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not a doctor or midwife, but my understanding is that an induction is more risky in these situations than waiting for labor to start naturally. When mothers are induced, their rates of shoulder dystocia are higher than if they are not induced (even though the babies continue to get bigger). </p> <p>I think it's completely reasonable for you to refuse the c-section, but from what I've read, I think the doctor is right that you want a spontaneous labor or a section, not an induction.</p> <p>Hopefully the baby will decide to make an appearance soon! :happy: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624655 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:10:35 +0000 mlm2934 1624655@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My cousin gave birth to babies vaginally that were 13 and 11 lbs. I don't understand why it's not even an option to start things that way, and see how it goes! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624650 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:09:41 +0000 Aimed 1624650@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>From a purely legal standpoint, they do make sense. IF they feel that an induction is risky at this point, then, they can't take that action and induce you, and accordingly they have advised you that a c-section is the best course of action. You refused the c-section/their advice, that refusal is your choice not theirs, and it is your choice to wait for natural labor and they have no control over your choices.<br /> Not saying I agree or disagree, but legally and ethically, they do make sense. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624649 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:09:13 +0000 MrsTiz 1624649@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mae: I think you are probably right. I see 3 choices here, they totally skipped over the middle ground and went straight for "OK you are on your own!" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-2nd-pregnancy-and-my-2nd-c-section-refusal#post-1624647 Fri, 09 May 2014 13:08:56 +0000 Silva 1624647@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@coopsmama: I'm sorry, I must be misunderstanding. Are you suggesting that people who follow their doctor's recommendations are "idiots"?</p> <p>@junebugmama: I hope things go well for you and your baby. I'm sorry you are in a frustrating situation. </p>