https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 06 May 2026 20:19:05 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766643 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 13:20:15 +0000 Tionn3 2766643@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sillymilly: She told me she had a bunch of old clothes and wooden toys that she still had and I said I very much wanted those, so maybe it won't sting as much because I'll take all the other stuff. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766639 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 13:08:47 +0000 sillymilly 2766639@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is hard, I think parents get so sentimental over our baby items, they sometimes don't think rationally. If you feel it is unsafe, tell your Mom that while you appreciate her saving your crib, it doesn't meet current safety standards so you do not feel comfortable using it. If you perhaps remember an item from your childhood (blanket, stuffed animal, etc.), say you would love that in the same conversation. Her feelings may be hurt, but she'll get over it. You are now the parent and you need to make the decision that is right for you and your child.</p> <p>My mom wanted to give me a cradle to use for my dd that my dad had made for me, but it was definitely not safe given any current guidelines. I told her while I'd love it for DD to put dolls in when she was older, it was not safe to use for sleep. This turned into a whole huge fight between us, but she eventually got over it once my DD arrived (although I never received the rocking horse my dad also made that I asked for instead so who knows if that is great advice). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766635 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 12:58:56 +0000 LadyDi 2766635@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL had my husband's old drop side crib and once I explained that it was unsafe she was fine with us not using it, she wasn't aware since she hasn't had babies since the 80s. It's her grandchild so hopefully that's all the explanation she needs! Situations with items with sentimental value are always tricky. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766634 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 12:58:23 +0000 Tionn3 2766634@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for the comments everyone. I'm going to stand my ground and say thanks but no thanks, and send her the link about the drop side cribs. She will get over it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766632 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 12:56:08 +0000 Tionn3 2766632@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@alphagam84: I suggested that she keep it at her house for when we visit, but then she went on to say I should bring a pack n play for the baby...It was weird. It was a totally reasonable suggestion. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766631 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 12:50:38 +0000 Tionn3 2766631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Yoyo: Thank you for this link! The picture really drive it home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766627 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 12:33:39 +0000 catlady 2766627@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely don't use it if you don't want to, especially if you feel it is unsafe.</p> <p>My MIL gave us the bassinet that DH (and the rest of her kids) used. SIL has also previously used it for her kids so I felt uncomfortable using the whole safety argument b/c then I'd basically be saying that SIL was unsafe with her kids. So we took the bassinet and didn't use it. We kind of made some excuses ("baby only wants to sleep in the Rock n Play", soon followed by "baby is too big for it now"). Eventually we told her we didn't have room for it anymore so she took it back. So that was our wussy way of dealing with it.</p> <p>When LO2 was on the way, MIL asked us if we wanted the bassinet back (and conveniently forgot that we had never used it and made references to LO1 using it). That time we told her we had bought our own bassinet and didn't have room for another. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766626 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 12:32:18 +0000 bubblegum 2766626@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How about repurposing it!? Maybe use the wood of the crib to make a changing table or something? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766622 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 12:22:09 +0000 emilye519 2766622@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My Mom tried to do that with a bassinet and she too didn't get that safety and sleep standards had changed. I told her I appreciated her thoughtfulness but no thank you. She was peeved but she got over it. It's not the last time we've had this type of situation either so it may be good practice for the future lol! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766621 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 12:21:59 +0000 ElbieKay 2766621@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Put your foot down now. Establish boundaries. Don't be afraid to be a b!tch. This will pay dividends later because she will reconsider additional boundary stomps if she knows you will push back.</p> <p>Parenting forces you to stand your ground because it is your job to advocate for your baby. Your baby's safety is paramount, and your mother's feelings and preferences should be secondary to your own (which are still secondary to baby's safety). She needs to respect that, not get all butthurt that safety guidelines have changed in the past several decades. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766615 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 12:03:41 +0000 NorthStar 2766615@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope, nope, nope. The safety of your child is much more important than her being upset. She will get over it and if she can't that isn't your problem. Sorry that I'm being so blunt, but the life of your child is much more precious. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766613 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:57:11 +0000 avivoca 2766613@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was just really up front about the stuff I didn't want. I would point out that it's a safety hazard and leave it at that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766611 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:55:50 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2766611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Your dad isn't being practical he's being just as aggressive as your mom. There is no need to put the crib together. Drop side cribs are no longer sold for a reason. They aren't safe. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766606 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:51:51 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2766606@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think there is a metal clip you can install so that it converts to a fixed side crib. However I think the bar spacing on the crib has also changed. </p> <p>Just say thank you but no. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766605 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:47:56 +0000 looch 2766605@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom was like this too, she wanted to give me some car seat that a friend of hers had from her son, and her son was like 15, so....</p> <p>The way I approached it just calmly and with fact. Now, my parents have come to terms with the fact that the technology has improved and recommendations have changed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766603 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:46:19 +0000 Meowkers 2766603@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom wanted to use a drop side crib at her house for my daughter. I sent her all info on why it's not safe and told her it's not happening. Just tell your mom it's not safe and that you would prefer a crib that meats modern safety standards. End of discussion. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766600 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:43:48 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 2766600@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Absolutely not. Lots of babies died because of those things. I mean, it's really not any different than if she gave you a car seat from the 80s. Not safe! If she persists, send her this:</p> <p><a href="https://www.cpsc.gov/content/cpsc-issues-warning-on-drop-side-cribs-32-fatalities-in-drop-side-cribs-in-last-9-years" rel="nofollow">https://www.cpsc.gov/content/cpsc-issues-warning-on-drop-side-cribs-32-fatalities-in-drop-side-cribs-in-last-9-years</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766598 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:43:12 +0000 alphagam84 2766598@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom wanted to give me the bassinet my sister and I used when we were children. I was imagining this cute little thing and it turned out to be mammoth and ugly! I just told her it was too big and not our style. She and my aunts kept saying they couldn't believe I didn't want it but I just didn't respond. It's your house and your child, just say no. My old crib I used as a baby is at my parents house to use when we visit. I'm pretty sure the side drops but I don't worry since it's only 5 nights a year or so. Why not suggest they keep it at their house? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766594 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:42:07 +0000 Adira 2766594@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would just ask flat up "Does it have a drop side? If so, I'm not taking - those are unsafe." Period. End of discussion. It doesn't matter if your mom is upset - the safety of your child is all that matters. If they aren't sure if it has a drop side or not (or are confident it doesn't), then agree to go with your dad's approach - let's look at it and then we'll decide.</p> <p>If you DO decide you like it and want it, then I would THINK your husband's grandmother would be understanding of you wanting to reuse the crib that you had as a baby.</p> <p>This is your first, right? This is the time to really start sticking up for what's right for you and your family. Trust me, once the baby is here, you're going to be hearing it from everywhere and this is a good opportunity for you to start sticking up for yourself and your family! Good luck! And congrats! &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766593 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:41:38 +0000 wrkbrk 2766593@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No. Just no. It's not safe, and that's all the reason your parents should need! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/my-mom-wants-to-give-me-my-old-crib#post-2766591 Thu, 10 Aug 2017 11:38:23 +0000 Tionn3 2766591@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom saved my crib from when I was little and now wants to give it to me to use for our first baby that is due in February. This crib is from the 80's and has been sitting up in the garage rafters for years. I'm worried about the safety of it. I think it has a drop side, and I know that all drop side cribs are banned from being sold in the US. I've tried to tell her before that I didn't really want it, but she is insisting that I take it and follows up with comments like " well then why did I save it for you for all those years" ( I don't know why you made this decision when I was like 4 ). My Dad is more of the mindset of put it back together, see if you like it and if you don't then you don't have to take it (he's very logical) .Additionally, my husband's grandma wants to buy us a crib and crib mattress, and I know she will get upset if she is unable to do so. I guess I need some advice, or to hear some shared experiences on this. I have no idea how to handle this. </p>