https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 06 May 2026 20:12:08 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210976 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 19:43:22 +0000 mrs. wagon 210976@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: we call him RJ for Robert Junior. We also like calling him Junior. We figure when he gets older he'll be Rob and Wagon Sr. Will be Mr. (our last name). I also hate most nicknames for Robert, but I love the name. I always dreamed of having a little boy, naming him after his father and calling him Junior... Got lucky in marrying a guy whose name I love! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210945 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 18:46:46 +0000 singingbee 210945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If we have a boy, we've picked out a name that we both love. The middle name will be my dad's name, which is also my brother's (who passed away) name. Hubby said suggested his dad's name one time as the middle name, but I told him his dad gets the same last name. The middle name is for both my dad and brother. We haven't decided on a girl's name. </p> <p>I like tradition and would go with Mark John and give a middle name from your family. You could take the Mark and add something from your family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210931 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 17:52:30 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 210931@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're naming after FIL. I don't think it's odd to have two Marks in your life and I don't think your family would take it as a rejection. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210860 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 15:24:13 +0000 jedeve 210860@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrs. wagon: Do you call Wagon Jr. by the same name, or does he have a nickname? Is it weird calling your kid the same name as your husband? I think that's what's odd to me, "Mark" is my investment banker wonderful but bossy FIL, not a baby! </p> <p>I definitely don't want John as the first name, neither does he. And I'm not a big fan of Robert as a first either (I hate most nicknames that people give it!). So it's kinda Mark or something else.</p> <p>I do really love the tradition. It's not so much about including my family, though that is an issue. (I mean, my MIL and GMIL weren't originally part of the tradition either!) It's mostly about is it odd to share a name? Would I feel weird yelling "Mark!" at Thanksgiving and having 2 people answer? Would it feel less like I chose my kid's name? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210778 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 13:36:51 +0000 mrs. wagon 210778@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I love naming traditions and we named wagon jr. After my husband. Since we're Korean American, there are all kinds of naming traditions for Korean names but no family names that we could use for an American first name. For instance, I always get jealous when hearing about naming a girl after both grandmothers! If you we tried to do that for Lil miss wagon it would be something like hyun soo young cho. Not pretty. I hate the pressure of choosing a name and wish we had family names to stick to. So I voted for mark John Robert... Sticking with tradition and adding a little something sounds great to me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210765 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 13:18:01 +0000 birdofafeather 210765@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hope for a girl? :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210747 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 12:38:19 +0000 littlebug 210747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would go with a different mix of the names, to include your family. Like John Robert or Robert Mark. That way you're including your side of the family, but you're also somewhat keeping your husband's family's tradition. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210707 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 11:04:48 +0000 purrpletulips 210707@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jedeve: you can skip the Jr. designation and just do "II, i.e. the second" however when i hear that I automatically think that the child is directly named after their father which doesn't appear to be the situation in your case.</p> <p>I picked other because I don't feel it should be solely your husband's tradition as you and him are a family yourself and should be able to start some new/blended traditions of your own. Perhaps DH could pick one of the names and then pick a name from your side of the family to include as well.</p> <p>I am all for including family names as DD was named after DH's maternal grandmother and a random middle name picked by DH (I actually insisted on the first name because I love it). We are pregnant with #2 and are team green so I'm working hard to incorporate a name shared by family members on each side into the name if we have a girl. If we have a boy it is a little more complicated because there is a tradition of having George as one of the names for a male: FIL is Ernst George but goes by George, DH's older brother is George something and also goes by George, nephew is Nicholas George goes by Nicholas and DH is Christopher George goes by Chris. I hate when people refer to their children by their middle name (since my opinion is if you wanted to call them that then it should have been their first name). I've put my foot down and told DH that we do not need anymore people who go by George in the family because it is confusing enough with the two we have and therefore I've relegated George to the middle name. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210660 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 09:56:08 +0000 jedeve 210660@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dagret: That's definitely part of it. My family lives in VA, and I'm in MT and they are already making comments about how his family will be the "real" family and they'll just be the "other" family. I'm afraid it's rubbing it in.</p> <p>It's dumb, because he's way more close to his family that lives in California than in Billings. It's all what you make of it and I'm worried their attitude will make them uninvolved.</p> <p>I think the big thing is holding my sweet baby and looking down saying, "Hi little father in law!" It just sounds weird! But I know that eventually I would associate the name Mark with my son, not my FIL! John also pointed out we'll be calling him "Grandpa" anyway. Ha! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210657 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 09:51:23 +0000 jedeve 210657@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow! The poll results seem to really disagree with the comments. Maybe because I put "other" and "something new?" (Looking back, that was dumb!) I think with "other" I meant something like "Mark Robert" or a new combo, and by "new" I meant something like Henry.</p> <p>I did think about Mark Robert, but I want the kid to have John in his name if we're gonna name it after FIL, because John is way more important to me than FIL! But I don't like have a Jr. </p> <p>I think that's one of the things I like/don't like about Mark. I like there is no nickname, but also, there's no diminutive form to make it the kids "own". And I HATE MJ. (Just personally - kids I didn't like in school tended to have initials. Nothing wrong with it.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210623 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 08:48:29 +0000 eeh 210623@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I really like the idea of sticking with family names personally. For us we agreed that if it was a boy he would get my husband's middle name which is also his dad's, grandpa's, great grandpa's, etc. middle name. If it was a girl (which it is) she would get my middle name. I'm the only one in my family that has it at this point but love the idea of sharing it with my daughter. </p> <p>We didn't worry to much about excluding either side of the family mostly because we plan on having more than one child and will use a name from the other side the next time around. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210611 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 08:28:49 +0000 Mrs. Oatmeal 210611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think its pretty cool that the boys in your family will have similar names, however, I voted for something new. Rather than go with Mark John or John Mark, I agree with @mamamoose - what about using just one of those names and choosing a different middle name?<br /> I love Mark and John though - such classic boys names (that are cute when they are little, but hold up once they're adults). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210609 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 08:21:03 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 210609@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@zippylef: Heh heh: Lala is a CJ... Josephine is such a great middle name (also after grandma). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210608 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 08:18:15 +0000 MamaMoose 210608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@zippylef: This.</p> <p>My husband and I will likely use family names. But we will be sure that if the first name comes from one side the middle name comes from the other side. Tradition is nice, but I dont think it's fair for you to have to do something you're uncomfortable with just because it's his family tradition. I like Mark Robert or John Robert. And honestly of he or his family had a problem with that compromise I think that's really unreasonable! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210602 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 08:09:06 +0000 dagret 210602@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband is insisting that we name any son we have "l. h." lastname, and I feel the same way you do about it - what about my family? No one in my family tree has a decent L or H name. But I think it's a knee-jerk reaction. I'm not sure that I'd even THINK about a family name if it wasn't for his family tradition. I think you might want to ponder why you're having this reaction. For me, it's the idea of judgement from my family - sure, she will name her kid after HIS family, what are we, chopped liver... But in the end I don't think it will matter to anyone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210600 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 08:06:15 +0000 heffalump 210600@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a big fan of tradition, so I'd use the name, and maybe try to come up with a nickname to make it less confusing when your with your fil. I have a friend who did this, she calls her son sj for Sam junior. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210596 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 07:55:54 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 210596@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I voted something new. Here's why... And maybe it's a stupid reason, but I've been working on my family's genealogy and there is a stretch of 5 generations where this was the tradition. It is so damn confusing every time I want to add a new piece of information because I have to focus on the year instead of the name... And in 1850 there were 3 of them alive. Each time I work on the tree I just wish they had picked new names! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210573 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 03:23:12 +0000 DillonLion 210573@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>GFIL is Kenneth. FIL is Kenneth Scott (goes by Scotty). DH is Kenneth Bradley (goes by Bradley), and BIL is Garrett Scott (goes by Garrett). So, everyone shares some part of their name with another male in the family (DH is named after his uncle who passed away as a young adult in a motorcycle accident)</p> <p>Before we knew we were having a girl we had picked out a boy name (Lucas Scott). The family tradition was still included and I got to help pick out a name also. We also decided that if the baby was a girl, we would use a name from my family. That was our compromise. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210569 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 02:46:25 +0000 loveisstrange 210569@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think you should compromise and use either John or Mark with Robert. I think John Robert is a wonderful, classic boys name. </p> <p>I have the same dilemma with my DH. His great-great grandfather was Francesco Guiseppe, it was changed to Frank Joseph at Ellis Island, so his great-gpa, gpa, dad, and older brother are/were all Frank Joseph. His middle brother is Joseph. He is determined that if we have a son, he will be Frank Joseph. I told him we could compromise and name him Franklin Joseph. I hate the name Frank but I think Franklin is cute. Joseph works for me. My grandmother's name is Josephine, so either gender we have next will be Joseph or Josephine as a middle. (I lean toward Caroline Josephine or Audrey Josephine for a girl. Our DD's initials are C.J. also, so we'll see. Her middle name is DH's grandma's name.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210564 Wed, 04 Jul 2012 02:28:45 +0000 brownie 210564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My grandpa was Kenneth something, my dad is Kenneth Raymond and my brother is Kenneth micheal. This only led to a tiny bit of confusion with my dads family. They called my dad Kenny and my brother baby Kenny or little Kenny. It worked out well for the most part. </p> <p>We call our son baby brownie all the time and use other affectionate names so it seems less important. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/naming-after-husbandfather-in-law#post-210534 Tue, 03 Jul 2012 23:23:27 +0000 jedeve 210534@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Okay, here's the scoop:</p> <p>My GFIL is named John Mark (Jack). My FIL is Mark John. My husband is John Mark (notice a trend?)</p> <p>So if we have a boy, my husband wants to name the kid Mark John. I'm unsure.</p> <p>Pros:<br /> 1. Great tradition!<br /> 2. Love naming the kid after husband, without them sharing the same first name.<br /> 3. I have an Uncle Mark and an Uncle John.<br /> 4. Mark is a strong, classic, easy name.</p> <p>Cons:<br /> 1. Mainly is his side of the family focused. We live closer to his family by several thousand miles, so I worry mine would take it as a rejection, even if I have uncles to also "name the kid after." Would including my dad and grandpa's name be too much? "Mark John Robert S."<br /> 2. Mark seems more appropriate for dads than little boys (which I know he won't be forever!)<br /> 3. I don't really get to "pick out" a boys name.<br /> 4. This is the main one - husband calls FIL "Dad", obviously. I call him Mark. Do I want two Marks in my life? Would it be weird having a kid and FIL with the same name?</p> <p>What should I do??<br /> (Besides obvious answer of "talk to your husband about it! He's studying for the bar and we aren't due till January, so it's not a priority. I just think about it!) </p>