https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 21 Apr 2026 08:19:51 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2718152 Thu, 30 Mar 2017 08:05:21 +0000 Orchid 2718152@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: thank you. I will pass the advice along. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2718150 Thu, 30 Mar 2017 08:04:13 +0000 Orchid 2718150@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mommy Finger: my friend didn't lie down right when the child went to nap. She did laundry and a couple other requested tasks first. The text came just the second she laid her head down. She had the monitor right beside her. It could be just a coincidence, but it happened twice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717884 Wed, 29 Mar 2017 13:41:14 +0000 Mommy Finger 2717884@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Orchid: Out of curiosity, what about the text made her think that she was being watched vs just a coincidence that the mother happened to text at that moment? Just playing devil's advocate here but if I had a nanny and knew that my LO napped during a certain time, I would probably wait until then to check since I wouldn't expect the nanny to be as distracted during that time as when my LO was awake. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717707 Wed, 29 Mar 2017 08:37:22 +0000 Anagram 2717707@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Orchid: coming back to this again. What I would tell your friend is that the first few months of a new caregiving situation are exactly what another PP said--it's when the nanny is putting their best foot forward. So napping right at the beginning is not really putting your best foot forward.</p> <p>I've posted about it a million times before here on HB, but we had a nanny we hired first that lasted only 3 weeks with us, and it was because of "little" things like this, but I kept feeling like--if this is her BEST self, how much worse is it going to be? And I ended up letting her go after 3 weeks. And our new (and current) nanny is just 1000x better in every way, even with the bumps in the road we've had.</p> <p>If your friend reads this, this is what I *like* about our current nanny. For the first 3-6 months, when I would find time to check the cameras briefly (and I always picked times I knew they should be home, like nap time), I would see my kiddo being asleep in her room and our nanny would be in the kitchen eating lunch, playing stuff on her phone, but sitting upright at our kitchen island and just seeming professional doing it. Like she was clearly listening out for my daughter, in case LO woke up. She wasn't like, laying on our couch with a blanket covering her. That may seem overbearing for me to care about, but it just really made it seem like, okay, this girl is professional and energetic. And now if I ever turned in and saw her napping a year later, I totally wouldn't care. Because now I trust her.</p> <p>And re: cameras. With both nannies, I disclosed we had cameras and they are in plain site. But with the first nanny, the more I watched, the more I disliked what I saw. Which made me watch more. Which made me see more I didn't like....which created a cycle and that's why she only lasted 3 weeks. With our current nanny, I probably checked in 4x a day at first. Now days, a year later....it's probably been 3 weeks since I even logged into our security system because now I trust her and I just don't have to think about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717350 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 10:28:28 +0000 Truth Bombs 2717350@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yeah I certainly don't get any sort of paid breaks. And I just don't buy into the idea that nannies never get a break and must really need one. Most grown adults are perfectly capable of staying awake for a full day with or without a break. And it's not like the nanny is the one getting up with the child at night. Plus, when I'm home with my children all day I certainly get breaks throughout the day when they play independently. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717330 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 10:16:23 +0000 Boogs 2717330@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: I agree with others, I haven't had a job where I had a paid lunch hour. </p> <p>Now if you are entitled to breaks previously discussed with your employer, or are allowed down time during the child's nap time, that should all be discussed with the employer. This is definitely teaching me that if I ever had a nanny, we would have a chat about these kinds of expectations ahead of time so things were clear for all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717301 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 09:41:11 +0000 LBee 2717301@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Littlebit7: I also just think open lines of communication! I would feel totally different about napping if I was contacted about it first -- i.e. nanny shot a quick text that said "I'm exhausted, do you mind if I close my eyes during nap? I am confident that I will hear LO when he/she wakes-up." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717291 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 09:33:09 +0000 Littlebit7 2717291@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LBee: fair enough I stand corrected. I did intend to type at a state level but alas. I also didn't refer to lunch breaks specifically. Ive also happened to work in states that have paid breaks: either lunch or two-15 minute breaks. And I've been both salaried and non-salaried.<br /> I think a ton of people could comment about breaks or lack thereof from their own personal experience (I've worked in plenty of jobs where I was supposed to be totally off the clock for a lunch hour yet there was no way to get my work done unless I worked and yet I was hourly with no overtime permitted).<br /> I guess this entire thread is just another reason why you really should have a pretty detailed contract with a nanny that outlines expectations from both the employer and the employee!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717275 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 09:12:14 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2717275@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LBee: Agree, even as a salaried employee I dont get a paid lunch hour. I'm expected to work 8-5 with a (8 hours plus a 1 hour break). But that hour I'm off the clock I can do what I want. </p> <p>I agree I"m not sure I'm ok with full on napping but if you want to lay down and rest and maybe close your eyes thats understandable. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717263 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 08:54:07 +0000 LBee 2717263@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: I'm pretty sure lots of hourly employees don't get a paid lunch hour. I'm assuming you aren't hourly? Also, during my first few months of my job it wouldn't EVER cross my mind to nap during lunch. </p> <p>@Littlebit7: FYI it is not federally mandated to get a break. I believe if you offer a break between 5 to 20 minutes you are required to pay, but that's it -- (I knew this because I worked a job where I had to clock out for lunch):<br /> <a href="https://www.dol.gov/general/topic/workhours/breaks" rel="nofollow">https://www.dol.gov/general/topic/workhours/breaks</a></p> <p>ETA: I looked more into it and it looks 24 states do address it on a state level. </p> <p>I would not put up cameras without disclosing. If I was in a situation where I was doubting my nanny's discretion then I would work from home and supervise or I would simply fire her. </p> <p>I am not okay with napping. I'm perfectly fine with watching TV, studying, etc, but I have no idea how heavy of a sleeper the person might be and if they might be able to hear my child if he needs something. I say this because my son's own father can't hear him when DS wakes up from nap if DH is napping so to me it's not that farfetched. I would feel different if it was like she just accidentally fell asleep, but it sounds more like she was trying to nap and the mom kept waking her up with texts. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717257 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 08:42:44 +0000 erinbaderin 2717257@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Boogs: I get a paid lunch hour. If I decide to spend that time napping (and when I was in my first trimester I did) nobody cares. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717229 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 08:12:05 +0000 Littlebit7 2717229@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I already commented about this above, but that comment about naps and breaks by @peasinapod got me thinking too. Most other jobs, it is federally mandated that employees get breaks (hourly employees). We tend to talk about nannies as hourly employees who are subject to overtime, no? So if that is the case, they are indeed entitled to a break, and given their job description, that can only really happen while kids are asleep. So maybe they want to nap for a half hour. I think that's ok as long as the house isn't a disaster at the end of the day and other duties have been addressed. Lord knows I'd like to do that at work some days (and on particularly rough days I have been known to grab a patient treatment room and close my eyes for 15 min). I deliver better patient care if I'm not a total zombie. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717179 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 06:03:09 +0000 Orchid 2717179@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bushelandapeck: @Anagram: @annem1990: @sauerkraut: @ShootingStar: @yerpie110: @travelingnanny: @Truth Bombs: @babypugs: @winniebee: @Andrea: @SweetiePie: @PinkElephant: @snowjewelz: @Madison43: @pwnstar: @Littlebit7: @Mrs. Lemon-Lime: @Bluebonnet: @gingerbebe: @hellobeeboston: @Boogs: @MenagerieMama: @Peasinapod: @maddyz: @catomd00: </p> <p>Thanks for all the responses! I'm forwarding them to my friend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717178 Tue, 28 Mar 2017 05:45:03 +0000 catomd00 2717178@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had a nanny when DD1 was an infant and no cameras. I think it's wrong to tape someone without their knowledge. I don't care if nanny naps while kids are sleeping. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717149 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 21:31:40 +0000 maddyz 2717149@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Defiantly not cool to have a camera and not tell them about it.</p> <p>I think making is totally fine. I would nap sometimes when my kids do. I also don't mind if house work happens when kids are awake. Keeping house is part of the work of a family and kids can help or play by themselves or whatever while the nanny changes the wash and makes lunch.</p> <p>I used to nap sometimes when I was a nanny but only after I'd tidied up. The lo I watched napped for ages and there is only so much you can do in someone else's 700 square foot apartment... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717142 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 20:55:48 +0000 Peasinapod 2717142@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have a nanny, but the napping thing really got me thinking. Nanny is different from most other jobs in that they don't get any breaks when the kids are up! Not even a lunch break. Seems fair to me that naps would be their time for at least part of it, especially since there is always the chance the child won't sleep so they may not even get that break. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717113 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 20:13:09 +0000 MenagerieMama 2717113@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have cameras that we got after we were having major nanny fit difficulties and now we would never go back! We use them for security and/or checking on the pet sitter now that we have LO in daycare. We fully disclose to anyone in the house - pet sitters, housecleaners, etc. I figure if someone we hire is not okay with us watching their work then why would we hire them? And I really don't have time to creep on everyone anyhow. When we had a nanny she would actually text us to check in if LO was being super cute or she had a question about something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717102 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 19:58:30 +0000 Boogs 2717102@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would disclose cameras, unless I suspected something. I would not be okay with napping, there surely would be something else I would have them do with the time I'm paying them for. If you think about it, what other jobs can you have where you are paid to sleep? Not many I can think up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717010 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 15:23:02 +0000 hellobeeboston 2717010@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have a nanny and do not have a camera.</p> <p>Her typical afternoon with my two LOs involves her putting the baby down to sleep (he naps from 2-2.5 hrs on average) and then half the time my older son will nap, but only for an hour or so. If she had the baby monitor in my other sons room with her and she fell asleep with him I'd be totally OK with that. </p> <p>But, I don't think she would do it. She is very professional. I'm about 99% sure she doesn't even turn the TV on if they're both sleeping (I would!) All of that to say, if she took a quick nap here &amp; there I would be OK with it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717009 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 15:21:28 +0000 gingerbebe 2717009@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have worked as a nanny before. I would want to know if there was a camera. It would just be creepy otherwise. </p> <p>The only times I napped while my kids napped was incidental. Like if I was rocking them in the chair and they fell asleep on me and I knew they wouldn't let me transfer them so I was stuck there for nap and I accidentally dosed off. Or I had to lay next to them to pat them down to sleep and I dozed off. In any case, it was when I was in the same room as them and it was accidental and there were no other children in my care like an older sibling. I definitely remember apologizing to the mom one time because I dozed off in this situation and she was totally fine with it but it was definitely a rare thing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717006 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 15:13:43 +0000 Bluebonnet 2717006@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had a nanny, but I work from home, so there was no need for a camera. If we did have a camera, I would disclose before hiring.</p> <p>However, I would not be comfortable with a nanny napping at all. I guess if I worked a non traditional schedule and the nanny had a really long day or something, then maybe, but not for traditional working hours. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2717000 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 14:48:45 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2717000@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No nanny, but if we did have one we would likely set up cameras in the house since we enjoy being able to see LO thoughout the day on DCP's cameras. We would absolutely disclose cameras in the house.</p> <p>I wonder if your nanny friend's employer knows her child's schedule so well she called when she knew the nanny would be free. My dad watches LO sometimes for me and I try to check in during naps or meal times. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2716991 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 14:25:07 +0000 Littlebit7 2716991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a part time nanny. I have a camera in the nursery that I could log into if I really wanted, my nanny knows its there, but I never check it when I'm not home. Truly. And I told her that. But I've considered getting a drop cam for the living room/kitchen (small open space) not for the nanny, because I trust her implicitly, but rather for our cat sitter, cleaning lady, and generally just knowing who is coming and going while we are away. I wouldn't use it to "watch" my nanny.</p> <p>My nanny does occasionally shut her eyes when my LO is asleep and I'm fine with that. I don't ask her to do housework, yet my laundry is almost always done and the house is clean, dishes are done etc when I come home, so I don't care if she takes a nap. She's nearing her 60s and still keeping up with toddlers all day. Heck, I would love a nap (but I just physically can't fall asleep).</p> <p>I think its fine to have a camera but the nanny needs to know about it. This is a two-way trust that needs to develop, and a secret camera really gets in the way of that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2716990 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 14:25:02 +0000 pwnstar 2716990@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Disclose cameras? Yes.</p> <p>Napping? No. A big fat no. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2716987 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 14:19:35 +0000 Madison43 2716987@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have nanny cams and disclosed them during the interview process.</p> <p>I seem to be in the minority but I am not ok with napping. Is it really so crazy to expect your nanny to be awake the entire time they are at work - I feel like that is he bare minimum required :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2716983 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 14:15:51 +0000 snowjewelz 2716983@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have a nanny but if I do and have cameras I think it's best to disclose. </p> <p>Maybe the mom knows it's nap time and the nanny would be more "free" so that's when she texts to see how things are going? </p> <p>I wouldn't mind the nanny napping as long as she can hear my kid and if she has nothing else to do. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2716976 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 14:10:43 +0000 PinkElephant 2716976@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Cameras are fine but absolutely need to be disclosed. </p> <p>I would not be ok with napping, unless the nanny is also a night nurse (for the same family) and is doing wake-ups with the baby so that her sleep is compromised for reasons directly related to her job with this family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2716974 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 14:10:09 +0000 SweetiePie 2716974@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>1) We have a dropcam (Nest) in my son's room. I did tell her about it when she started.<br /> 2) I do think that if the camera was there before the nanny was hired OR you're on good terms with the nanny and decide to get one just because, it's right to let her know. I would want to know - people do embarrassing things when they're alone :silly:<br /> 3) If everything was done that fell under her duties then I would not care if she shut her eyes and rested ONCE IN A WHILE. If I saw she was napping every day or the days she did I came home and the home was a shit show and work wasn't done, I'd be upset.<br /> However, I do think that napping at all in the first few weeks or couple of months probably wouldn't give me a good feeling. That's when you're supposed to put your best foot forward and Id be surprised if she was choosing to do that before we're all comfortable with each other. The only thing I can think of to compare it to is taking days off at an office job or leaving early - barring a major reason, I wouldn't take days off or leave early in the first 2-3 months of a new job. Once I've established myself as a good worker, I would feel comfortable asking. </p> <p>I think this is really a matter of preference and obviously this mom doesn't like your friend doing it - so if she likes everything else about the job, she shouldn't do it. She should ensure she gets enough rest at night and go in being prepared - make coffee or do whatever she needs to do. I stay home now with a 2.5 yo and even I rarely nap - like 2x a month maybe - if he didn't sleep well and kept me up the night before or I don't feel good. I feel like I have other things I should be doing besides napping.<br /> However, if she is overall getting not a great feeling about this family/mom and this is just one thing on top of many, just cut losses and get out of there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2716971 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 14:08:29 +0000 Andrea 2716971@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would disclose the camera and I would not be OK with napping. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/nanny-naps#post-2716959 Mon, 27 Mar 2017 13:57:13 +0000 winniebee 2716959@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had a nanny and never had cameras.</p> <p>I wouldn't mind if she napped - if her other responsibilities were handled and the baby monitor was near her. </p>