https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 02 May 2026 05:29:34 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-588351 Fri, 22 Feb 2013 21:24:35 +0000 tysonja 588351@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>no advice, but just to say i hear you!! it was the hardest thing i've ever gone through in my life, too :) i found i couldn't even take it 'a day at a time', but had to just focus on one feed at a time. or even less... one failed latch at a time! oh man... </p> <p>you are awesome mama!!</p> <p>ETA: i just read your update -- so glad she is gaining weight! what a great feeling!! :) bottle feeding is great too -- we eventually transitioned to that too :) in fact in my 2nd week pp, i took a whole week off bf'ing to heal my nipples and just pumped. he still bf just fine after a week of no boob. no pressure at all, just to say that if you are ever curious to try for 'fun' later on, it could work! :) these little babies sure are smart! your little girl is gorgeous. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-588340 Fri, 22 Feb 2013 21:19:32 +0000 immabeetoo 588340@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@photojane: so you have a hands free bra? I only pump weekly but love it! Hope you find a little peace with your decision :) happy and healthy baby is all that actually matters and you've got that goin on so yay!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-588305 Fri, 22 Feb 2013 21:04:22 +0000 Mrs. Stroller 588305@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Congratulations on your new little bundle! I know I'm late to chime in but wanted to encourage you to see an independent LC if you still want to try giving BFing a go. It is SO HARD at first, but so worth it once you get it to work. It wasn't smooth for us til 5ish weeks when his little mouth got bigger. Going to see the LC was a huge turning point for us at 2w when he hadn't gained back to his birth weight yet. If you do want to try pumping, I'd recommend the hospital grade Medela Symphony - it's so much more comfortable than their other pumps (I've had them all, ugh). Good luck, momma, whatever decision you make, you're doing the best for your baby and your family. xoxo </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-588293 Fri, 22 Feb 2013 20:56:17 +0000 photojane 588293@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks everyone! I just wanted to update... We've decided after the impossible task of getting her little mouth to latch, that we're a bottle feeding family. I've been trying to pump, but I'm not sure if that will last. I'm still feeling guilt and jealousy, and reading successful breastfeeding stories still makes me cry, but I'm trying to learn to be okay with our situation. She is gaining weight &amp; seems happy, and there is nothing more important! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-570384 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 19:04:42 +0000 Kemma 570384@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hang in there Mama, it does and will get easier! You and your wee babe are both new to breastfeeding and it's going to take some time for you to master it but every feed it will get a little easier and before you know it it will be second nature :-)</p> <p>@Phillybaby2013: I like your idea of nursing lying down, even at four months my LO will always nurse lying down even if she's having a bad day feeding!</p> <p>Keep up the wonderful job you're doing with Sadie and just remember that this too shall pass! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-570243 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 15:51:15 +0000 Phillybaby2013 570243@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@photojane: i dont really have any advice but want to know you are not alone in this. BF has been not fun for us either and I've had several meltdowns over it. B lost 10% of his weight so we're supplementing too. We're doing 3 bottles a day after BFing. I was ready to quit on Friday after repeatedly trying to get him latch with him pushing against me, screaming. My sisters friend who's an LC suggested I try side lying and lots of skin to skin. It's only been 2 days but he loves the side lying position and it's so much less stressful for both of us and he doesn't fall asleep after 2 seconds like he does in the cradle hold. Try to hang in there, I know I am but it's a struggle. Hugs to you and Sadie! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-570221 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 15:28:37 +0000 immabeetoo 570221@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@photojane: she's so cute, saw a picture on the bump thread! Hang in there. I had my husband help us adjust for a while until we got more experienced - I also had him at my LC appointments so his more rested self could see her tips and techniques. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-570162 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 14:31:30 +0000 mamimami 570162@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hang in there! Congrats on your gorgeous baby. Won't say I know what you're going through but in general I think this is a bad time to make decisions for the long term. It's an emotionally trying time and you're probably not really yourself right now!</p> <p>I hear so many people say, "I'll just pump!" And that makes it sound so easy which it isn't. Try to get her on the boob as much as possible before going down that road, because it's hard/impossible to change your mind. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-570148 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 14:16:02 +0000 NerdBee 570148@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You're doing a great job already by hanging in there. It will get better! </p> <p>We had a latching problem during the first two weeks. My milk didn't start coming in until 5 days pp and we were supplementing with formula. LO had gotten used to the fast flow of the nipple and would only suck for a few seconds at the breast before realizing that milk was not coming out right away and he would scream and scream until I would give him a bottle. Things started getting better when I switched to the medela calma nipple because it made him work a bit to get the milk out so that the switch from bottle to breast wasn't as drastic. I continued trying to nurse him before supplementing and slowly he began to accept nursing and I was able to EBF. </p> <p>Hope you figure out what works for you soon! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-570069 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 12:43:00 +0000 travelgirl1 570069@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You are doing such a GREAT job, persevering is SO hard in those early days and even later days sometimes. Just by keeping going you are doing a great job for little Sadie (love the name by the way). We used a shield at the start, which helps, but we did have our fair shair of problems. She was very interested in it but just couldn't figure it out. Have you had a LC come to your home? That could help, then what helps me when A is refusing to nurse is to try nurse her in her sleep, or just before she wakes up. She resists less when she's sleepy. It is super, super hard and if it doesn't get better for you then exclusively pumping might be a better option, while still trying to nurse a little to tempt her, without relying on it to feed her. Good luck and you'll find lots of support on here, everyone knows how hard it is, mama : ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-570034 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 11:50:58 +0000 DillonLion 570034@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The beggining of breastfeeding is so hard for soany women, myself included. I was totally unprepared for how difficult it was. Just remember that things will only get better from here. Your milk supply will regulate, Sadie will become a better and more efficient nurser, and your breasts will be more accustomed to the change. Hang in there!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-570016 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 11:35:09 +0000 lemondrop 570016@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It isn't day by day at this point, it is feeding by feeding. You and Sadie have a lot to learn about each other before you become a real team. It gets easier with time, but that is what it takes- time. If you can survive these early weeks, she will get stronger and each day will start getting easier. </p> <p>My hospital had a breastfeeding support group that was great. I went to the lactation consultant twice a week for the first 3 weeks too. Hang in there. We've done all that, supplementing, shield, he fell asleep all the time, I cringe thinking about those early days. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-569991 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 11:18:09 +0000 Maysprout 569991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's hard to feed a crying baby so if she would get flustered I'd start the 5 S's to get her calm before trying again. So I sometimes nursed her swaddled. And to keep myself from getting rattled I'd just have a movie or something on so I could just hold her for a bit and relax while I rocked her and she calmed down.<br /> Best wishes! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-569988 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 11:15:50 +0000 Mrs. Tricycle 569988@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We use a shield, which does make latching so much easier. When baby fusses and screams and refuses to latch, I find he needs to be distracted. I sing really loudly, and that temporarily distracts him and allows him to latch a little more calmly. And you crying is pretty normal - part of adjusting to mama life!! Hang in there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-569985 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 11:12:55 +0000 SleepyMonkey 569985@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>the first few days are so tough! hang in there. i needed my DH to help position her and my mom's set of hands to soothe her by stroking her head to help get her on in the beginning. can DH take her for a little bit to soothe her and calm her down before trying to get her latched back on? when my LO is frantically hungry, she needs a break so my DH takes her and pats her, then gives her back to me and that sometimes works. also when i was stressed, i'd make these fast movements when trying to position her thinking the faster i got her latched on, the sooner she'd stop crying. but that just made her more stressed out and more frantic. so just try to move slowly, talk in a soothing tone, etc. etc. and my baby used to do a hoarse cry too - its ok. she survived! it gets better, promise! you are doing a great job. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-569982 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 11:11:51 +0000 Sammyfab 569982@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Aww....it will get better! Hang in there!!</p> <p>I don't think there's any harm in supplementing/bottle feeding if that's what makes you happy. We had supply and latch issues in the beginning and I gave myself 1 month as my deadline to decide whether or not I was going to keep trying to BF or to EP. Miraculously, at 4 weeks, my LO decided that was the day he wanted to EBF (he was also circumcised that day). It has been smooth sailing since.</p> <p>Set small goals, find a lactation consultant and build a support team, and most importantly, take care of yourself! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-569976 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 11:00:21 +0000 matador84 569976@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It seriously does get better. Can you try pumping and bottle feeding until you get the hang of things? It can be so overwhelming at first! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-569970 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 10:52:11 +0000 hilsy85 569970@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hang in there mama!! Good for you for having her tongue tie clipped so early...my Los was clipped until 2 wks! Did the doc check her for a lip tie as well? Sometimes they go together and lip ties can also impact breast feeding. </p> <p>Things will get better!! Especially as the engorgement lessens it'll be easier for her to latch, and if you have to use a shield for a little while that's ok--it doesn't mean it'll be forever! The sleepy newborn phase will pass and she WILL get the hang of it--just remember, she's learning just like you're learning! Do you have an LC who can come to your house? Or a breast feeding support group to can go to? </p> <p>The first few weeks are SO HARD but as she gets bigger and gets the hang of it, so will you and it will all click one day soon. And supplementing is a-ok--you're making sure your baby gets fed and that is the most important thing!! Big hugs!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-569969 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 10:52:05 +0000 pl0508 569969@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh honey I am so sorry ! I wish I had some advice for you but know lots of ladies will chime in with some ! Just wanted to say you are doing great and things will get better whatever route you take ! BIG HUGS ! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-encouragement#post-569963 Sat, 16 Feb 2013 10:45:17 +0000 photojane 569963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hi mamas! I am so excited to be on the other side of the 'bee, and be among the mamas! Sadie girl was born on Tuesday, and she is gorgeous. </p> <p>We are having a rough go at BF'ing though, and it's draining me emotionally. I feel like a big fat failure, and cry all day. It started with a tongue tie (clipped on day 2), and now she just won't latch without an hour of work/soothing/forcing. We use a shield, but we still can't feed while awake - she just screams, which has caused my poor baby to go almost completely hoarse (this KILLS me, her hoarse cry breaks my heart). Once I get her to sleep, and pop it in, she'll suckle a little if I keep rubbing her cheeks/feet/chin/back &amp; putting a cold wipe on her, but this is obviously not a long term feeding solution. We're supplementing per doc's orders (she's lost 11% of her birth weight), and I'm so, so tempted to just call it quits and do 100% formula/pumped milk. My milk came in yesterday, and while I hoped that would be the magic thing that made this easier... nope. Now we're just upset while covered in milk. Yesterday and last night were a sticky, emotional mess.</p> <p>I know BF'ing isn't easy for most women, and I anticipated that, but it's WAY harder than I could've imagined. I need some encouragement. </p>