https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 04 May 2026 10:08:09 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice/page/2#post-1644747 Mon, 19 May 2014 12:58:14 +0000 Adira 1644747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cmomma17: Me too!!! :D </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice/page/2#post-1644741 Mon, 19 May 2014 12:55:42 +0000 cmomma17 1644741@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: I like your managers! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice/page/2#post-1644643 Mon, 19 May 2014 12:26:19 +0000 gingerbebe 1644643@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: I would tell whoever needs to know right away. If it were me, I'd tell my boss and then let him inform whoever on the project needs to know. Tell him/her you'd like to keep the information confidential to the extent possible, and document the conversation in writing if you have concerns about your job security. I told my boss at 5 weeks (I was REALLY sick and it was REALLY busy at work) and my job knew I was pregnant 10 weeks before our families. It just made my life easier that way. I'm so glad I did, because now I have complications that may make my presence at work iffy the next few months but its not a completely unexpected thing since everyone knows I am pregnant. And I don't even have a timelined project! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice/page/2#post-1644631 Mon, 19 May 2014 12:20:29 +0000 Adira 1644631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sunny: That's a very good point! I'll make the schedule assuming one developer - not necessarily me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice/page/2#post-1644622 Mon, 19 May 2014 12:17:45 +0000 sunny 1644622@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yay. I was just going to say that when I went on leave, my manager just added additional resources to cover my work since it was critical it finished on time. So when you are planning, you just think of it as 1 developer rather than Adira the developer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644621 Mon, 19 May 2014 12:17:38 +0000 kjpugs 1644621@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think going off your updates, I would just make a realistic schedule and then in 4 weeks, tell them the news and say you are happy to either rework the schedule or work OT (if you are able to, that is.) Basically give them the info when YOU'RE ready and then give suggestions for how you feel comfortable handling it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644610 Mon, 19 May 2014 12:13:57 +0000 yellowbird 1644610@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: yay!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644487 Mon, 19 May 2014 11:28:09 +0000 Adira 1644487@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsjyw: Yes!! It was such a relief to hear the advice that I REALLY wanted to hear, haha! And coming from a manager who totally would understand the situation. I'm so happy I asked him! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644483 Mon, 19 May 2014 11:27:10 +0000 Mrs. Coral 1644483@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira--Ah sweet relief! I'm glad you got some resolution :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644481 Mon, 19 May 2014 11:26:13 +0000 mrsjyw 1644481@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: great advice from your managers! :)</p> <p>Yep, do the "realistic" project timeline as is, they'll have to have a backup resource for when you're out! :) It'll still be completed according to the "realistic" timeline. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644475 Mon, 19 May 2014 11:24:30 +0000 Adira 1644475@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Okay, update!</p> <p>So I told my mentor about the situation because I'm pretty good friends with him and I felt comfortable telling him I'm pregnant, but he really couldn't give me much advice since he hasn't been in that situation. He said that he suspect that my program will want, even need, to find someone else to work on this effort, but that they obviously couldn't just replace me because I'm pregnant, so he wasn't sure what I should do. So he encouraged me to talk to my functional manager who's both a software manager on a program and a functional manager who could give me career advice.</p> <p>So I just met with my functional manager and basically told him the whole situation. And I LOVE my functional manager. He basically said that it's not my problem and I shouldn't worry or stress over it. To make the schedule as if I'm going to be working the project, but to keep it in the back of my mind that I'm not and try to think of some people to offer as replacements to take over when I go on leave. And then tell whenever I feel comfortable telling. It's the business' problem and not mine and they'll deal with it once it's in the open. And that I need to focus on staying healthy and not stress about stuff like this! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644472 Mon, 19 May 2014 11:23:51 +0000 creativemomma15 1644472@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think I agree about telling your boss/person in charge of your project but being very clear to keep it quiet. I do have a question though, in your over thread about announcing to ILs didn't you say that you feel like you're showing? I'm just wondering if you don't tell your boss if they are going to wonder if you are showing already or will be soon... Just a thought, I work with all women though so they speculate on this stuff more than guys </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644449 Mon, 19 May 2014 11:14:09 +0000 Mrs. Coral 1644449@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it were me, I would feel that I owed it to my company to tell them now. I would, however, request that it be kept on the DL until X date when I announce it to my coworkers. I guess it depends how many people this schedule will be delivered to. </p> <p>I personally am going to tell my boss a few weeks before the remainder of the group, just so he can start mulling over a game plan for my absence. </p> <p>Good luck!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644416 Mon, 19 May 2014 11:04:45 +0000 jedeve 1644416@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If someone else can take over the project when you go on mat leave, make the schedule as is and tell them later. If it has to be you, I would tell whomever needs to be involved in the schedule now so they can plan accordingly. </p> <p>I am 100% for employers being accommodating of pregnancy and parenting and all that jazz. But I think it's our responsibility to make that as easy as possible for them. I think you can make it very clear that you are disclosing your pregnancy earlier than you feel comfortable and do not want to discuss it further at this time, but I think that practically they need to know you will be gone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644402 Mon, 19 May 2014 11:00:25 +0000 Mamaof2 1644402@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Littlebit: agree! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644311 Mon, 19 May 2014 10:36:17 +0000 Adira 1644311@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Madison43: Yeah. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644280 Mon, 19 May 2014 10:28:43 +0000 Madison43 1644280@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wonderstruck: same. But what an uncomfortable position to be in! I'd hate to announce before I was ready. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644271 Mon, 19 May 2014 10:23:26 +0000 wonderstruck 1644271@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Yeah, I don't know anything about programming, basically I just mean I would tell the people that really need to know and tell them to keep it to themselves until you're ready to announce. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644268 Mon, 19 May 2014 10:20:53 +0000 Ra 1644268@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Littlebit: Agreed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644262 Mon, 19 May 2014 10:18:23 +0000 Littlebit 1644262@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: I would tell everyone that NEEDS to know for sure. So in your case the program manager and the senior software person. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644226 Mon, 19 May 2014 10:08:31 +0000 mrbee 1644226@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You should absolutely tell the senior people who need to know, so they can plan accordingly. Maybe someone can help out with the project, so they can take over in December when you go out on leave... or maybe with two people on the project, it will get done before December? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644222 Mon, 19 May 2014 10:04:36 +0000 Adira 1644222@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: @hellobeeboston: @Anagram: @snowjewelz: @blackbird: @wonderstruck: @rahlyrah: @2PeasinaPod: @MrsTiz: @jetsa: When you ladies say I should tell my boss, do you mean the program manager who has tasked me with coming up with the schedule? What about the senior software person who is "overseeing" my work and will be helping me come up with the schedule? Won't it also be necessary to tell him? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644192 Mon, 19 May 2014 09:56:20 +0000 jetsa 1644192@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd tell your boss and ask them to keep it quiet </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644105 Mon, 19 May 2014 09:30:22 +0000 MrsTiz 1644105@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would also say to tell your boss, and when you do just let him/her know that you aren't ready to announce just yet but you thought they needed to know. Maybe that will help keep it unannounced until you feel more comfortable? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644104 Mon, 19 May 2014 09:30:22 +0000 Pumuckl 1644104@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Can you schedule an extended vacation in there around Christmas so that might cover some time and include some additional buffer time (maybe it’s possible to "hide" it somewhere like a pre-review phase or something other fancy). That way you could just adjust it a little once you come clean in a month. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644095 Mon, 19 May 2014 09:27:43 +0000 2PeasinaPod 1644095@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think I'd also be honest about it, strictly telling my boss about my situation. Together, we'd come up with a schedule and a plan on whether that included a replacement for while I was out or an extended timeline based on me being out. I'd also ask that my boss keep my news confidential until I was ready to announce. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644088 Mon, 19 May 2014 09:25:47 +0000 Ra 1644088@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband is the technical director for a web development firm and he said that you should probably tell your boss. He said he understands that you want to wait to tell, but by NOT telling you could be adversely affecting your team. If you are going out on maternity leave, they will most likely have to hire a contractor to fill in for you (or hire a new employee). This takes time, especially finding a quality junior or mid-level developer. I'm assuming working in the government sector, the person would need to get some sort of security clearance as well. Even if the senior level developer or another developer within your firm took over, you will need time to do a code hand off. Additionally, whoever takes over your code may have different time estimates. It would unnecessarily complicate things and could have a significant impact on the budget.</p> <p>I would just tell your boss and ask him/her to keep it quiet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644080 Mon, 19 May 2014 09:19:47 +0000 wonderstruck 1644080@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd be honest about it - you don't have to tell everyone, but I'd at least tell my boss. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644076 Mon, 19 May 2014 09:18:37 +0000 blackbird 1644076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think you need to privately talk to your boss. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/need-work-advice#post-1644073 Mon, 19 May 2014 09:16:31 +0000 snowjewelz 1644073@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd just tell your boss and ask him/her to not say anything but at least your timeline will be understood. </p> <p>I had to tell my boss at around 8 wks b/c I happened to have my review and my boss thought I was really unhappy or upset with him so I had to fess up! It turned out not to be a big deal since he isn't going to tell anyone. It actually worked out for me since he's sensitive to why I come in late or appear lethargic half the time! </p>