https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 09 Apr 2026 21:41:45 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898592 Sat, 05 Oct 2019 23:00:28 +0000 Chuckles 2898592@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was wondering how her mood is otherwise. Does she seem excited and happy about things like going to the playground, etc? Does she have fun playing with other kids? I think as long as she seems generally happy and like she has activities she enjoys, I wouldn't worry about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898583 Sat, 05 Oct 2019 19:24:58 +0000 Mama Bird 2898583@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Dynamite: that's so true! It is a gift, but I do try to help her see things in a less negative light (and to help her build up her confidence in general).</p> <p>@foodiebee: that's exactly what I said about the baby! </p> <p>@cyoung: yes, trying to get her to look on the bright side and to play games where the toys are just having adventures, building things, not being sad. I'm sure sadness has its place and it's good to have an outlet for it, but... everything should be in good measure. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898552 Sat, 05 Oct 2019 08:14:00 +0000 cyoung 2898552@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My friends daughter did this but it passed. She would say “Mickey scared!” She is super sensitive to things. I agree that maybe just I enforce positive stuff and tell her “everything is okay” my friend would tell her daughter that and say “no Mickey is happy. He is smiling. Are you happy?” </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898430 Thu, 03 Oct 2019 12:31:56 +0000 foodiebee 2898430@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wonder if you could try to reinforce a more positive thought process with your responses? Like try to point out to her "oh actually mommy's tummy is warm and comfy and safe inside, like a big hug!" or just something to plant a positive seed that might help her thoughts go there after a while? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898429 Thu, 03 Oct 2019 11:42:45 +0000 Dynamite 2898429@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mama Bird: it sounds like she's really empathetic. What a wonderful gift! </p> <p>Girls are really socialized to be very accommodating. I wonder if she just needs some help identifying and establishing her own boundaries. Maybe developing more agency, so she feels like she can help. </p> <p>Also, some people are just wired that way. Since she's so young probably the only thing you can do is help her to develop appropriate responses to deal with those sorts of feelings. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898427 Thu, 03 Oct 2019 11:19:32 +0000 Mama Bird 2898427@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Dynamite: no, she wants me to save them - or if I've had enough, her brother. She's really kind and the first one to see if someone is upset and needs reassurance. It's just that she often sees "upset" where everything is fine, and I wonder if this is reflecting her own feelings. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898397 Thu, 03 Oct 2019 02:28:39 +0000 Dynamite 2898397@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is she trying to save them? Take care of them? She might want to be the hero, so they have to be in peril. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898389 Wed, 02 Oct 2019 21:31:25 +0000 Mama Bird 2898389@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cake2017: hmm... yeah, I ask why the elephant is sad and she'll say "he's lost" or "he's hungry" or "he tripped and hurt his foot." Nothing terribly unusual, but her mind will consistently go to her toys being miserable and needing help or rescue. If I "help" them, the game usually starts over and once again, someone needs help - it's like this bottomless well of unmet needs.</p> <p>She's dealing with the baby pretty well. Much better than her brother responded at her age..I'm pretty sure this mindset came way before the baby. And before baby was born, she said several times "I can't wait for little sister to come out, it's dark in your tummy and she must be so scared!" Yeah. She's always imagining everyone must be sad and scared. I don't know why. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898378 Wed, 02 Oct 2019 19:25:34 +0000 cake2017 2898378@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mama Bird: I would ask open ended questions to why everything is sad, mad, crying? </p> <p>How is she adjusting to the new addition? You mentioned you were on maternity leave? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/negative-child-how-worried-should-i-be#post-2898373 Wed, 02 Oct 2019 18:15:46 +0000 Mama Bird 2898373@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm getting more and more worried about my four year old. I've spent a lot more time with her this year than usual, thanks to being on maternity leave, and I'm seeing very clearly that she sees everything in a very negative light. If she sees a toy, she's always going on about how the toy is sad/lost/scared. Even if the toy is smiling!!! Today she brought out a set of toys with little emoji faces and I happened to ask what the faces are. She said most of them were crying or mad - again, even the smiling ones. She's always been more sensitive and fearful than average, but this distorted view of the world... I'm just noticing how it seems to touch everything she sees. What is this??? Should I be trying to get her therapy or something? </p>